台北的街道上,眾多路人全都抬頭望著夜空發愣,任由雪花落在肩上。419Please respect copyright.PENANAK8kGJEEVRN
許多年輕人全都在那紛紛雪花中手舞足蹈、大吼大叫。419Please respect copyright.PENANAyzDL8IFhKe
似乎整個原本在舊軌道上運轉的世界,都因為這雪而緩暫的停了下來。419Please respect copyright.PENANATyIJ6bk26l
我快步衝過那些大叫的人群奔向捷運站,手上滑開羅慕筠的手機號碼。419Please respect copyright.PENANABwABzx9CMY
她沒開機。419Please respect copyright.PENANA6mnzjccsZG
我用Line、臉書、IG敲她,全都沒有回應。419Please respect copyright.PENANAjJLtFUCuR1
當我衝出東門捷運站時,仍用Line的免費通話與FB的連線通話輪著狂播。419Please respect copyright.PENANAPAVkkahoe8
然後罵自己笨:「啊對……她手機沒開機啊……」419Please respect copyright.PENANA7HNgxWBCun
跑到青田街C-803時,我……已經喘到上氣不接下氣了。419Please respect copyright.PENANAzYvZSgmysW
肚子裡的漢堡薯條濤天翻騰。419Please respect copyright.PENANAPoBVlMIvLb
我臉色慘白的望著昏暗的客廳,一遍空無一人。
必須找到木桐杉的機車鑰匙才行。419Please respect copyright.PENANAdAsDUrBMe8
從這裡騎車到女舍大概只要五分鐘,而我已經跑不動了。雖然考上駕照之後我仍總是給人載,但無論如何我都要見到羅慕筠。419Please respect copyright.PENANA3NKk5YFDhH
她……值得我今天晚上不計一切代價的去找她。419Please respect copyright.PENANAwLfyr8MOmf
我是指,不計一切代價。419Please respect copyright.PENANAkPYwPBrb7L
但現在,學長不在房間……我打電話,他也沒開機。419Please respect copyright.PENANAT90JYhVV1L
偏偏在這個時候?419Please respect copyright.PENANAHJMcBcPfRI
一陣小小的崩潰情緒襲來。419Please respect copyright.PENANASfdL1Jtb0W
我鞋子沒脫,怒騰騰的走向張楓的房間。或許他知道木桐杉跑去那裡。419Please respect copyright.PENANAJvUn9u0Fxk
握住門把的瞬間,才想起張楓人在台中。而且他的房門,永遠都是鎖上的。419Please respect copyright.PENANAoJKP5f9mP2
怎麼這個時候全世界都在跟我作對!?419Please respect copyright.PENANAZoWwwFSWW7
我宣洩怒氣似的轉動門把。
房門竟然打開了。419Please respect copyright.PENANALwlLzsTBpy
419Please respect copyright.PENANAews9M7iAOv
我愣愣的望著門把……這還真是始料未及啊…419Please respect copyright.PENANAKMNsVCW0LU
我一邊自嘲,一邊朝張楓的房內望去。
那是一間附衛浴的八坪大房間,房裡一切的一切全都一塵不染的。419Please respect copyright.PENANAnWqvIqM7eg
一張雙人床靠在牆角,米色的羊毛地毯鋪在地上,一旁還有個中型衣櫃。419Please respect copyright.PENANAnMituMavWM
雙人床頭貼了Nana Mouskouri與久石讓的海報,一旁的純實木書櫃上擺著一整排的(我完全不認識)古典音樂CD以及一些外文書。419Please respect copyright.PENANA3dHEARpNYs
澳美佳牌子的四尺高腳電腦桌上是27吋的iMac蘋果桌電。419Please respect copyright.PENANA81Z7YgdjC1
電腦旁邊擺了一個柚木相框。419Please respect copyright.PENANApWX4pC8T1g
相框裡,兩名黑頭髮的小男孩一高一矮正對著鏡頭微笑。419Please respect copyright.PENANAZjYSj3S2XW
看那模樣,大約八歲或九歲。
沒了。419Please respect copyright.PENANAozl2ulSmwx
整個頗大的房間,因為簡單的擺設而略顯空曠。419Please respect copyright.PENANAIjl4TPaN1L
縱然如此,空曠的房間除了這些東西以外,什麼也沒有。
我強壓著猛然加速的心跳將門把從內部鎖上。419Please respect copyright.PENANAJBsyKyUlkp
迅速退回客廳將房門關上。像是剛偷了什麼東西一樣。419Please respect copyright.PENANAFOSrP0BF1K
突然身後,房門打開,暖色的燈光照進黑暗的客廳。419Please respect copyright.PENANASvdslSPtun
419Please respect copyright.PENANAZAcpw3GUM4
「………張楓今天一早回去台中了。」杜子凌說。419Please respect copyright.PENANARLl1e0Rj42
「原來你在家呀?」419Please respect copyright.PENANAw3uNPcNTAf
我望著對方手上的……那是他們國貿系在看的原文書嗎?419Please respect copyright.PENANAJlhxBe0iIz
這種東西怎麼會出現在杜子凌手上?419Please respect copyright.PENANAf4LjgDzGqM
「剛回來。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAZFxU5uH3id
「帥哥學長,你今晚真的不跨年啊?」我問。419Please respect copyright.PENANAxZ2XDlppmL
他搖頭。419Please respect copyright.PENANAJZywt56z4E
「要不要打給波米學姐啊?你如果打算跨年夜窩在家裡苦讀,就算是這種爛行程,我相信她也一定會二話不說馬上趕到。」我開他玩笑。419Please respect copyright.PENANAaRrBhE0MH1
「波米去澳洲了。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAhDNEmJykd0
「啊!?」我脫口驚呼。419Please respect copyright.PENANA1PH1xOcPrE
「打工換宿,在果園採草莓。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAtInsb4VGwK
「什麼時候的事?」我幾乎不敢相信。419Please respect copyright.PENANARk0xtpVeFE
杜子凌歪頭想了想:「三天前吧?」419Please respect copyright.PENANARlWqEbXine
「那…你………」419Please respect copyright.PENANA2smfgBcKCl
我想要說些什麼,卻又不知該說些什麼。419Please respect copyright.PENANA3bz48T1fZH
只見那頭金髮搖動:「她有她的人生。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAnCly8qzw6y
他這簡簡單單的一句話。419Please respect copyright.PENANAEXwkuraIZc
語質輕,語意重。419Please respect copyright.PENANA8khGag2urr
有種給我平常不斷累積力氣,面對別人才能這般輕易說出口的感覺。419Please respect copyright.PENANAFEJ65n5qYJ
突然他皺起眉頭瞪著我。419Please respect copyright.PENANAOjaGBWGKXz
「倒是你……怎麼這時候會回來?」419Please respect copyright.PENANA8ZLfnZlQvD
「車…對!我要找木桐杉借車!」我聽他這樣一講,才嚇了一跳想起。419Please respect copyright.PENANAWxA7RO0ftF
「蛤?你要載人嗎?」他滿臉疑惑。419Please respect copyright.PENANAqJz3zdTcU0
「我沒有…但…但……我必須…」我大急,語氣散亂。
機車鑰匙飛過客廳。
我伸手接下。419Please respect copyright.PENANAVtEmluw8Nw
「鑰匙在我這,雖然不知道你要幹嘛……去吧!別弄壞了。」淡淡的語氣。419Please respect copyright.PENANAlQijS5UuCL
我用看到菩薩的表情望向杜子凌。419Please respect copyright.PENANAKpmuIjmKjh
他被我這表情給逗笑了。419Please respect copyright.PENANAaFvG47qYaL
「學長……」419Please respect copyright.PENANAM1nVmf8CsP
「幹嘛啦?」419Please respect copyright.PENANAKF1Y5unrZr
「你知道一萬次悲傷嗎?」我想他一定知道。419Please respect copyright.PENANAGCBpNHLt8s
「啊?你在講歌嗎?我知道啊!逃跑計畫。」他果然知道。419Please respect copyright.PENANA6MOMDSEw78
「逃跑計畫?」419Please respect copyright.PENANAaDeIgMSk3M
「嗯呀!樂團的名字,一萬次悲傷就是他們唱的。你問這個是要?」419Please respect copyright.PENANAUQ1mq5De1H
「沒……」我大力搖頭:「我只是覺得…這首歌,實在非常好聽。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAUmPTHmKGFC
然後我丟下一臉茫然的杜子凌衝向客廳大門。419Please respect copyright.PENANAIq1w0mGS5F
「謝了!!帥哥學長!!」419Please respect copyright.PENANAmMPvjPuYeJ
我在巷子裡跨上野狼機車。419Please respect copyright.PENANAeovIWDcT5E
N檔,催油門。419Please respect copyright.PENANAjIMyeB2iw9
雪花落在我傾前的背上。羅慕筠彈吉他唱歌的影片畫面出現在我的意識裡。畫面清晰。419Please respect copyright.PENANAGGzQdgJ2fL
野狼怒吼,衝向學校女舍。
「oh honey419Please respect copyright.PENANAtzCAemEuPj
我腦海裡全都是你419Please respect copyright.PENANAWHqV5zMAvJ
oh無法抗拒的心情419Please respect copyright.PENANAfKPsnUYpg1
難以呼吸 」
疾駛過幾個巷口以及社區球場的邊緣。419Please respect copyright.PENANAJ2BqCbRLh0
空蕩蕩的街道上什麼人也沒有。419Please respect copyright.PENANAtipriMiGbo
大家都忙著去跨年了,不是孤身一人,就是想待在重要的人身邊吧?419Please respect copyright.PENANAawh2Ll0wsn
經過三個十字路口。419Please respect copyright.PENANAlWIV8xvARh
學校的外圍矮牆輪廓現形。
「tonight419Please respect copyright.PENANANjaSf8Wcd5
是否又要錯過一個夜晚419Please respect copyright.PENANATg2bmTVtP7
是否還要掩飾最後的期待419Please respect copyright.PENANAFN0ddMscWM
oh tonight 」
柚芳樓,女舍前。419Please respect copyright.PENANAjxP51FMPWc
我大口哈氣,白煙不斷從嘴裡噴散。419Please respect copyright.PENANAuFfMAaX02K
「沒有喔……她沒有在房間裡。」舍監看著我。419Please respect copyright.PENANAYZNUTLSvdn
「蛤?」我傻眼。419Please respect copyright.PENANADM41ihls5r
「她一個小時前剛出大樓,我親眼看見的。」419Please respect copyright.PENANATnwij1eAgN
「她有沒有說要去那裡?」我追問。419Please respect copyright.PENANAaaPTcXuKRy
「沒有…她什麼都沒有說。你找她是要……?」419Please respect copyright.PENANA2hYvijRem4
我轉身衝向野狼機車。419Please respect copyright.PENANAk1uTLhBQar
女舍監不知道在我背後鬼吼鬼叫什麼。
「一萬次悲傷419Please respect copyright.PENANAXy3MqpowcD
依然會有Dream419Please respect copyright.PENANA5jF14bQXst
我一直在最溫暖的地方等你419Please respect copyright.PENANAwnl2ZBSVEN
似乎只能這樣停留一個方向419Please respect copyright.PENANA7wBhtdAo8x
已不能改變 」
教堂前廣場,野狼停下。419Please respect copyright.PENANAtkGr4VGqAR
我衝進空無一人的聖堂,但那裡只有耶穌跟聖母瑪利亞。419Please respect copyright.PENANAfqClrEfLYl
「耶穌保佑……妳快點出現啊……」我嘴裡胡亂唸著。419Please respect copyright.PENANAhA7ezQvOOK
退回廣場,我四處張望。419Please respect copyright.PENANAuGRN27gSUM
沒有,什麼人也沒有。419Please respect copyright.PENANAy2YN5lzDOV
就連三樓神父房間窗戶也沒亮燈。419Please respect copyright.PENANAoeGDQfKTs3
人都跑到那裡去了?
「每一顆眼淚是一萬道光419Please respect copyright.PENANABN2omPf7NK
最昏暗的地方也變得明亮419Please respect copyright.PENANAtAEQuNtvps
我奔湧的暖流尋找你的海洋419Please respect copyright.PENANAUpofr4AHZy
我注定這樣 」
我在紅燈底下不斷搓揉凍僵的雙手。419Please respect copyright.PENANA04Dr8qZfTx
在這天殺的雪夜裡騎車我居然沒戴機車手套!419Please respect copyright.PENANAVSqC1Xrqgr
我趁著四十多秒的紅燈,打開野狼車廂。419Please respect copyright.PENANAJKPvM7hLV2
裡面只有毛巾、一串保險套、喝剩一半的寶礦力、有裂痕的折疊鏡。419Please respect copyright.PENANAXOTdJ3lPw4
居然連機車雨衣也沒有。419Please respect copyright.PENANAFS1zT6WHXH
紅燈還剩十秒,我罵聲連連的跨上機車。419Please respect copyright.PENANAcJmVFL5jn1
419Please respect copyright.PENANAIPXO1zOoVJ
「oh honey419Please respect copyright.PENANAGg8wsh18VT
你目光裡充滿憂鬱419Please respect copyright.PENANARqUHsVBz8J
就像經歷一遍飛行419Please respect copyright.PENANAfEDXiRD3qw
難以逃避 」
又一個紅燈下,我在絕望中邁向這唯一有可能的方向。419Please respect copyright.PENANAtA3eiScn2j
雖然想知道離放跨年煙火還剩多少時間,但我的手已經不想離開機車握把。419Please respect copyright.PENANAZBedQrpddD
就讓它們凍在那邊好了……419Please respect copyright.PENANAUof6sviOj4
我仰起被寒風刺痛的臉龐望向一旁的休旅車。419Please respect copyright.PENANANkSGIWrWbH
不知為何車裡一家子大小全都望著我張大嘴巴。419Please respect copyright.PENANA3dlaT0542Y
我伸手往自己頭上一探。419Please respect copyright.PENANAtz8pmMMXPm
「靠北!」419Please respect copyright.PENANAx8dc5xJN6I
我居然沒有戴安全帽,從青田街騎到這裡,一直都沒戴。
「tonight419Please respect copyright.PENANA7Lu48NzX2s
是否還要錯過這個夜晚419Please respect copyright.PENANAufvBPeKfRO
是否還要熄滅所有的期待419Please respect copyright.PENANAXfe1xuNLEi
oh tonight 」
在我育幼院的廣場邊緣停下。419Please respect copyright.PENANAH2vcbX45Dp
光鮮的白油漆建築,屋裡人聲鼎沸,燈光照在滿地積雪的廣場。419Please respect copyright.PENANA9AFFESNVZj
廣場另一邊的遙遠角落。419Please respect copyright.PENANAC09krX3GRP
雙人盪鞦韆,兩隻脫了手套的手緊緊牽著。419Please respect copyright.PENANA3TSOjhQfW4
他們正抬頭望著不斷飄雪的夜空。419Please respect copyright.PENANA20HgpvvUMd
我低頭尋思……感覺羅慕筠也不在這裡。419Please respect copyright.PENANAP3aRGRD8uI
我……是不是有錯過什麼地方……
突然。419Please respect copyright.PENANAPoUJNB2b2v
沒有鎖頭的鐵門畫面浮現,它是半開的。419Please respect copyright.PENANAlFIMLz19Yf
我往我們學校的方向望去。419Please respect copyright.PENANAbsh4x2pAB6
那山巒稜線……雖然遙遠但依然可見。
「一萬次悲傷419Please respect copyright.PENANA0DCQhZbSJj
依然會有Dream419Please respect copyright.PENANAXFiXp26k3b
我一直在最後的地方等你419Please respect copyright.PENANAWMYBlbA1ut
似乎只能這樣419Please respect copyright.PENANAJaZQ62WngI
僅有一個方向419Please respect copyright.PENANAkll81LyFMT
已不能改變 」
經過半個多小時的路程,居然沒遇到任何一名警察。419Please respect copyright.PENANA6xLajvVlXC
真不知今天晚上我是倒楣還是幸運。419Please respect copyright.PENANAXlvDHK7dQO
學校大門,保全大叔正翹著腳在警衛室裡看跨年演唱會的手機直播。419Please respect copyright.PENANALB9TRrvkT8
直到我騎野狼衝過才茫然抬頭。
學校大操場旁的市民大道上,星星落落的身影驚訝的望向我。419Please respect copyright.PENANAQO6rWRQP5D
這邊是禁止騎機車的。419Please respect copyright.PENANAz4mfZEgI7p
但今天晚上我什麼都不管了。419Please respect copyright.PENANAubsqTmVw29
野狼機車衝過人行磚上車道,然後…直往後山上騎。
「每一顆眼淚是一萬道光419Please respect copyright.PENANAOZBKVlYS9z
最昏暗的地方也變得明亮419Please respect copyright.PENANAU6jnyuUjTO
我奔湧的暖流尋找你的海洋419Please respect copyright.PENANAOFnwZnruDZ
我注定這樣 」
大口喘氣,白煙猛噴。419Please respect copyright.PENANA90RUk41OGD
我在文學院F棟底下將機車熄火。419Please respect copyright.PENANA1s6cEQ86ml
除了遠處角落的萊爾富便利商店有光以外,四周空無一人。419Please respect copyright.PENANAccICi4az1p
記得今天晚上,幾乎整個文學院的都去參加人擠人的跨系煙火派對了。419Please respect copyright.PENANAJ1gnTJMiH6
幾乎。
不斷落下的雪花不知何時,已經停了。419Please respect copyright.PENANA9zpr5gnSqZ
我抬頭望向F棟的屋頂:「High place……」
我緩緩步上屋頂。419Please respect copyright.PENANABAZyZ2O6SE
這裡的視野非常好,幾乎可以一覽四分之一個台北市了,只可惜101大樓仍被信義區一帶的山巒擋住。不過縱然如此,這地方還是很適合俯視山腳下半個校園作畫。環境清幽,沒人打擾。419Please respect copyright.PENANAT7elkBkjyj
然而今晚這裡沒有畫,也沒有畫架。419Please respect copyright.PENANAneQcHgM3Pl
只有一名曾被畫過的人,孤獨的站著。419Please respect copyright.PENANA2YYtaAf8sd
她肩上積著雪,佇立在一遍雪柔的白花之中。419Please respect copyright.PENANAljjZklUhML
那長髮背影垂著頭,望著山下那變成白色的淡暗世界。
我望著眼前屋頂上這人生絕美的畫面。419Please respect copyright.PENANAmmN8Ow6mpU
深呼吸,緩緩往前踏步。419Please respect copyright.PENANAEmqiTneV4R
我開口:「……太陽不見了、河裡的魚都不游了,學校裡的每個人都厚厚裹著外套圍巾快步走過,突然人們都停下了腳步。停下了腳步,抬頭望著天空。」
那背影一陣顫動。419Please respect copyright.PENANAWcKEKHt0bI
肩上雪堆滑落。
「像是雨,從天空落下,但沒那麼快,是用飄的,輕飄飄的落下來。人們睜大了眼睛,看著初雪,落在自己的掌心上。」我於離她距離四尺處,駐足。419Please respect copyright.PENANAx2AIxS6GAM
那背影的雙肩隨著大口呼吸而上下起伏。419Please respect copyright.PENANAS36qkhb8Tr
我繼續說。
「每個人的表情像是孩子拿到第一次見到的糖果,先是用各種角度去看得仔細,接著將掌心伸到鼻子前聞一聞,最後舔一舔。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAECynjR9oTG
我說完,還真的將右手伸到鼻子前猛力一吸。419Please respect copyright.PENANADUk66qeYOs
「哎呀……是雪!」我假裝驚呼。
羅慕筠微笑的轉過身來。419Please respect copyright.PENANAwp420hzWTM
穿著紫色厚大衣的她,模樣看起來美得驚人。419Please respect copyright.PENANAixreNAFL0K
她打開有點凍啞的嗓子,也說。
「大家都樂瘋了…每個人都樂瘋了……此刻雪花像落葉一樣落下。在水泥地上越積越多,在屋頂上越積越多,在陸橋的扶手上越積越多,逐漸,整個世界都變成白色的了………大概就是這樣,有畫面了沒?」419Please respect copyright.PENANA068ACELnR2
419Please respect copyright.PENANABdPgN0lcNH
我望著她那唇紅齒白的臉蛋,長長的睫毛,笑彎了的眼。419Please respect copyright.PENANA7o0RUAgF4M
我閉起眼睛。
我說:「好美。」419Please respect copyright.PENANAvEXojlfPqo
突然,我有一股熱淚盈眶的感覺。419Please respect copyright.PENANAcov4lmaEro
羅慕筠笑著問:「好美?你是在說雪嗎!?」419Please respect copyright.PENANAIqqVVJLaOb
我張開雙眼。419Please respect copyright.PENANAWvPlm76Jmm
「我是在說妳。」
她的熱淚已爬滿了整張臉。419Please respect copyright.PENANA2hycGjxn9e
我衝過去抱住她。緊緊的。419Please respect copyright.PENANAAc2iv0ggCB


