台北的街道上,眾多路人全都抬頭望著夜空發愣,任由雪花落在肩上。439Please respect copyright.PENANApuRcDXIzsY
許多年輕人全都在那紛紛雪花中手舞足蹈、大吼大叫。439Please respect copyright.PENANAEmbW01jFjW
似乎整個原本在舊軌道上運轉的世界,都因為這雪而緩暫的停了下來。439Please respect copyright.PENANALmvdVcN4UI
我快步衝過那些大叫的人群奔向捷運站,手上滑開羅慕筠的手機號碼。439Please respect copyright.PENANAvbRP52PqCc
她沒開機。439Please respect copyright.PENANAGQ2nFxgF8f
我用Line、臉書、IG敲她,全都沒有回應。439Please respect copyright.PENANAVtBnpHpkaA
當我衝出東門捷運站時,仍用Line的免費通話與FB的連線通話輪著狂播。439Please respect copyright.PENANAUoKdzQLr8B
然後罵自己笨:「啊對……她手機沒開機啊……」439Please respect copyright.PENANAcmifSeGlNH
跑到青田街C-803時,我……已經喘到上氣不接下氣了。439Please respect copyright.PENANA8KLSINbhP4
肚子裡的漢堡薯條濤天翻騰。439Please respect copyright.PENANAMwcW72yGJ9
我臉色慘白的望著昏暗的客廳,一遍空無一人。
必須找到木桐杉的機車鑰匙才行。439Please respect copyright.PENANAPM3wHiShyq
從這裡騎車到女舍大概只要五分鐘,而我已經跑不動了。雖然考上駕照之後我仍總是給人載,但無論如何我都要見到羅慕筠。439Please respect copyright.PENANAFmp1cfeYV1
她……值得我今天晚上不計一切代價的去找她。439Please respect copyright.PENANAgNMdGvPGc7
我是指,不計一切代價。439Please respect copyright.PENANACiEwPkQU8n
但現在,學長不在房間……我打電話,他也沒開機。439Please respect copyright.PENANAhxxifZuQCY
偏偏在這個時候?439Please respect copyright.PENANAhdE6qUqt14
一陣小小的崩潰情緒襲來。439Please respect copyright.PENANAX0fsd09ZYu
我鞋子沒脫,怒騰騰的走向張楓的房間。或許他知道木桐杉跑去那裡。439Please respect copyright.PENANAyiUPJTYljp
握住門把的瞬間,才想起張楓人在台中。而且他的房門,永遠都是鎖上的。439Please respect copyright.PENANAZO384gmlHs
怎麼這個時候全世界都在跟我作對!?439Please respect copyright.PENANAAiqy7CCzI3
我宣洩怒氣似的轉動門把。
房門竟然打開了。439Please respect copyright.PENANAoqTJbtMhsy
439Please respect copyright.PENANAGGkIHR3Ct1
我愣愣的望著門把……這還真是始料未及啊…439Please respect copyright.PENANAlyK1kWTpLp
我一邊自嘲,一邊朝張楓的房內望去。
那是一間附衛浴的八坪大房間,房裡一切的一切全都一塵不染的。439Please respect copyright.PENANAqrICqbonRq
一張雙人床靠在牆角,米色的羊毛地毯鋪在地上,一旁還有個中型衣櫃。439Please respect copyright.PENANATXl8CcJBim
雙人床頭貼了Nana Mouskouri與久石讓的海報,一旁的純實木書櫃上擺著一整排的(我完全不認識)古典音樂CD以及一些外文書。439Please respect copyright.PENANAj6GmjcUhVx
澳美佳牌子的四尺高腳電腦桌上是27吋的iMac蘋果桌電。439Please respect copyright.PENANAF2fEeqc9Bk
電腦旁邊擺了一個柚木相框。439Please respect copyright.PENANAREfhqIJK49
相框裡,兩名黑頭髮的小男孩一高一矮正對著鏡頭微笑。439Please respect copyright.PENANAdNBNlYfppd
看那模樣,大約八歲或九歲。
沒了。439Please respect copyright.PENANALeMRSk0dW8
整個頗大的房間,因為簡單的擺設而略顯空曠。439Please respect copyright.PENANABaxzhKXcrQ
縱然如此,空曠的房間除了這些東西以外,什麼也沒有。
我強壓著猛然加速的心跳將門把從內部鎖上。439Please respect copyright.PENANA4mi5S4onSJ
迅速退回客廳將房門關上。像是剛偷了什麼東西一樣。439Please respect copyright.PENANA61gkeDxgYN
突然身後,房門打開,暖色的燈光照進黑暗的客廳。439Please respect copyright.PENANA6UOHO4Mktc
439Please respect copyright.PENANAb9HfBmrDfp
「………張楓今天一早回去台中了。」杜子凌說。439Please respect copyright.PENANA49xFTUGRHZ
「原來你在家呀?」439Please respect copyright.PENANAJYVvs8ssVv
我望著對方手上的……那是他們國貿系在看的原文書嗎?439Please respect copyright.PENANAGtfCVU5UQR
這種東西怎麼會出現在杜子凌手上?439Please respect copyright.PENANA955XGIwYm7
「剛回來。」439Please respect copyright.PENANA1iv5f0tHPH
「帥哥學長,你今晚真的不跨年啊?」我問。439Please respect copyright.PENANARbxHpqZgTO
他搖頭。439Please respect copyright.PENANARKQhSxhW3E
「要不要打給波米學姐啊?你如果打算跨年夜窩在家裡苦讀,就算是這種爛行程,我相信她也一定會二話不說馬上趕到。」我開他玩笑。439Please respect copyright.PENANAOoTvRN5CEX
「波米去澳洲了。」439Please respect copyright.PENANANFsxRZiVy3
「啊!?」我脫口驚呼。439Please respect copyright.PENANAyDuEGBfnJp
「打工換宿,在果園採草莓。」439Please respect copyright.PENANA1qu48WKWR3
「什麼時候的事?」我幾乎不敢相信。439Please respect copyright.PENANAlC9epbPy5Z
杜子凌歪頭想了想:「三天前吧?」439Please respect copyright.PENANAgtb2vvL3U7
「那…你………」439Please respect copyright.PENANA8kpHPMcAb2
我想要說些什麼,卻又不知該說些什麼。439Please respect copyright.PENANA23I3RgCLjh
只見那頭金髮搖動:「她有她的人生。」439Please respect copyright.PENANAqgaAO19a68
他這簡簡單單的一句話。439Please respect copyright.PENANAPrrRntM0S1
語質輕,語意重。439Please respect copyright.PENANAAlvphrZ50z
有種給我平常不斷累積力氣,面對別人才能這般輕易說出口的感覺。439Please respect copyright.PENANApCEfLrhgGW
突然他皺起眉頭瞪著我。439Please respect copyright.PENANA4PFPsQxDFn
「倒是你……怎麼這時候會回來?」439Please respect copyright.PENANA3eM3monMtj
「車…對!我要找木桐杉借車!」我聽他這樣一講,才嚇了一跳想起。439Please respect copyright.PENANA4qGxSW1XEm
「蛤?你要載人嗎?」他滿臉疑惑。439Please respect copyright.PENANADbx6DgpNuu
「我沒有…但…但……我必須…」我大急,語氣散亂。
機車鑰匙飛過客廳。
我伸手接下。439Please respect copyright.PENANAfrTz5ofN1C
「鑰匙在我這,雖然不知道你要幹嘛……去吧!別弄壞了。」淡淡的語氣。439Please respect copyright.PENANAUfdqZlrhTn
我用看到菩薩的表情望向杜子凌。439Please respect copyright.PENANAywhP03DfPA
他被我這表情給逗笑了。439Please respect copyright.PENANArsZ9PYtbkn
「學長……」439Please respect copyright.PENANA0ElzYOOi4t
「幹嘛啦?」439Please respect copyright.PENANAfCzKqB4gXG
「你知道一萬次悲傷嗎?」我想他一定知道。439Please respect copyright.PENANAmiyZWE3VCV
「啊?你在講歌嗎?我知道啊!逃跑計畫。」他果然知道。439Please respect copyright.PENANAt4eQL9BScc
「逃跑計畫?」439Please respect copyright.PENANAusknC1OSzw
「嗯呀!樂團的名字,一萬次悲傷就是他們唱的。你問這個是要?」439Please respect copyright.PENANAxNFR3WDtoG
「沒……」我大力搖頭:「我只是覺得…這首歌,實在非常好聽。」439Please respect copyright.PENANAMRqiubdJAP
然後我丟下一臉茫然的杜子凌衝向客廳大門。439Please respect copyright.PENANAwfgSnrwr2m
「謝了!!帥哥學長!!」439Please respect copyright.PENANATC4BS8DKTn
我在巷子裡跨上野狼機車。439Please respect copyright.PENANAyhzncHAgGB
N檔,催油門。439Please respect copyright.PENANAj1Ibt8YwS1
雪花落在我傾前的背上。羅慕筠彈吉他唱歌的影片畫面出現在我的意識裡。畫面清晰。439Please respect copyright.PENANAifUVbu8RA2
野狼怒吼,衝向學校女舍。
「oh honey439Please respect copyright.PENANA8oabmteXEo
我腦海裡全都是你439Please respect copyright.PENANA9tyzYSzTjk
oh無法抗拒的心情439Please respect copyright.PENANAiRPUi0NF7W
難以呼吸 」
疾駛過幾個巷口以及社區球場的邊緣。439Please respect copyright.PENANAZDKUAl9zQg
空蕩蕩的街道上什麼人也沒有。439Please respect copyright.PENANAJjA19HUMSM
大家都忙著去跨年了,不是孤身一人,就是想待在重要的人身邊吧?439Please respect copyright.PENANAUPzOlgUXu1
經過三個十字路口。439Please respect copyright.PENANAHPFhmQDHCR
學校的外圍矮牆輪廓現形。
「tonight439Please respect copyright.PENANAGOYDEpf90r
是否又要錯過一個夜晚439Please respect copyright.PENANAF6pZ3zvTli
是否還要掩飾最後的期待439Please respect copyright.PENANAhL1DUWSNkU
oh tonight 」
柚芳樓,女舍前。439Please respect copyright.PENANAc4YQ0x6DQx
我大口哈氣,白煙不斷從嘴裡噴散。439Please respect copyright.PENANAaZIZtprbY0
「沒有喔……她沒有在房間裡。」舍監看著我。439Please respect copyright.PENANAwMs1sWxmi2
「蛤?」我傻眼。439Please respect copyright.PENANAwnMeFIidHP
「她一個小時前剛出大樓,我親眼看見的。」439Please respect copyright.PENANAnysMOjouRH
「她有沒有說要去那裡?」我追問。439Please respect copyright.PENANATqASx20Mw5
「沒有…她什麼都沒有說。你找她是要……?」439Please respect copyright.PENANAAd0m8BH9TX
我轉身衝向野狼機車。439Please respect copyright.PENANAksWBiMgBS5
女舍監不知道在我背後鬼吼鬼叫什麼。
「一萬次悲傷439Please respect copyright.PENANA8wcjEoty5w
依然會有Dream439Please respect copyright.PENANAxiIB5qlib6
我一直在最溫暖的地方等你439Please respect copyright.PENANAhWKhXq8u8M
似乎只能這樣停留一個方向439Please respect copyright.PENANAvadHDlr4ys
已不能改變 」
教堂前廣場,野狼停下。439Please respect copyright.PENANAW1I57cjlDY
我衝進空無一人的聖堂,但那裡只有耶穌跟聖母瑪利亞。439Please respect copyright.PENANAD8RJxyxEik
「耶穌保佑……妳快點出現啊……」我嘴裡胡亂唸著。439Please respect copyright.PENANAmjtlw7PKF4
退回廣場,我四處張望。439Please respect copyright.PENANAFnq3RAxJ9S
沒有,什麼人也沒有。439Please respect copyright.PENANA8DsylElvM4
就連三樓神父房間窗戶也沒亮燈。439Please respect copyright.PENANAUxMXVewGzR
人都跑到那裡去了?
「每一顆眼淚是一萬道光439Please respect copyright.PENANAGyFEbIp3A6
最昏暗的地方也變得明亮439Please respect copyright.PENANAWA6yYGF34g
我奔湧的暖流尋找你的海洋439Please respect copyright.PENANAmgkVmgPQ9U
我注定這樣 」
我在紅燈底下不斷搓揉凍僵的雙手。439Please respect copyright.PENANAKZAyzKXTX7
在這天殺的雪夜裡騎車我居然沒戴機車手套!439Please respect copyright.PENANAdjCQWZIla4
我趁著四十多秒的紅燈,打開野狼車廂。439Please respect copyright.PENANAyfHdZ9pLAY
裡面只有毛巾、一串保險套、喝剩一半的寶礦力、有裂痕的折疊鏡。439Please respect copyright.PENANAM2reJcSaiP
居然連機車雨衣也沒有。439Please respect copyright.PENANAQ9M5Q9rhVM
紅燈還剩十秒,我罵聲連連的跨上機車。439Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6al9hateV
439Please respect copyright.PENANADznaHhferw
「oh honey439Please respect copyright.PENANAMrEpl7pyo6
你目光裡充滿憂鬱439Please respect copyright.PENANAPU2llaQHrp
就像經歷一遍飛行439Please respect copyright.PENANAar3poSGtVr
難以逃避 」
又一個紅燈下,我在絕望中邁向這唯一有可能的方向。439Please respect copyright.PENANAe63QghxFrg
雖然想知道離放跨年煙火還剩多少時間,但我的手已經不想離開機車握把。439Please respect copyright.PENANAcE9C1IHfS7
就讓它們凍在那邊好了……439Please respect copyright.PENANA3CYMlyeNnH
我仰起被寒風刺痛的臉龐望向一旁的休旅車。439Please respect copyright.PENANAVlAfEW1Pb2
不知為何車裡一家子大小全都望著我張大嘴巴。439Please respect copyright.PENANAh83tT9bxel
我伸手往自己頭上一探。439Please respect copyright.PENANAWRdCRJilLJ
「靠北!」439Please respect copyright.PENANAnZIqnvsgpM
我居然沒有戴安全帽,從青田街騎到這裡,一直都沒戴。
「tonight439Please respect copyright.PENANA1XjiiaBcQ2
是否還要錯過這個夜晚439Please respect copyright.PENANAV1eCv5nyTn
是否還要熄滅所有的期待439Please respect copyright.PENANAvR0zDnRbQj
oh tonight 」
在我育幼院的廣場邊緣停下。439Please respect copyright.PENANAtNfiuCE4NA
光鮮的白油漆建築,屋裡人聲鼎沸,燈光照在滿地積雪的廣場。439Please respect copyright.PENANAoW4aStBxf4
廣場另一邊的遙遠角落。439Please respect copyright.PENANAu5eleEuuRa
雙人盪鞦韆,兩隻脫了手套的手緊緊牽著。439Please respect copyright.PENANAL9dOWKmxld
他們正抬頭望著不斷飄雪的夜空。439Please respect copyright.PENANAQaOlTYT0RS
我低頭尋思……感覺羅慕筠也不在這裡。439Please respect copyright.PENANANt0d5fOL49
我……是不是有錯過什麼地方……
突然。439Please respect copyright.PENANAfIdvjosnfZ
沒有鎖頭的鐵門畫面浮現,它是半開的。439Please respect copyright.PENANAzoZXYMfe8o
我往我們學校的方向望去。439Please respect copyright.PENANABfh1cjmbm1
那山巒稜線……雖然遙遠但依然可見。
「一萬次悲傷439Please respect copyright.PENANAImDJeA3TTS
依然會有Dream439Please respect copyright.PENANAQtRj98ku2T
我一直在最後的地方等你439Please respect copyright.PENANAfNlRAKmtzq
似乎只能這樣439Please respect copyright.PENANA5aA41QDpNv
僅有一個方向439Please respect copyright.PENANAKYEb3OkiHV
已不能改變 」
經過半個多小時的路程,居然沒遇到任何一名警察。439Please respect copyright.PENANAvWd8czwy80
真不知今天晚上我是倒楣還是幸運。439Please respect copyright.PENANA7mjvLR2UaS
學校大門,保全大叔正翹著腳在警衛室裡看跨年演唱會的手機直播。439Please respect copyright.PENANAwMfodxuORg
直到我騎野狼衝過才茫然抬頭。
學校大操場旁的市民大道上,星星落落的身影驚訝的望向我。439Please respect copyright.PENANAnsAfRAaT5c
這邊是禁止騎機車的。439Please respect copyright.PENANAbhYlGYOSU6
但今天晚上我什麼都不管了。439Please respect copyright.PENANAzu3tZFvRaZ
野狼機車衝過人行磚上車道,然後…直往後山上騎。
「每一顆眼淚是一萬道光439Please respect copyright.PENANAL32J25TeYe
最昏暗的地方也變得明亮439Please respect copyright.PENANAIfaiLH72o0
我奔湧的暖流尋找你的海洋439Please respect copyright.PENANAsJ2aIbPUOh
我注定這樣 」
大口喘氣,白煙猛噴。439Please respect copyright.PENANA9b7uu8XPAZ
我在文學院F棟底下將機車熄火。439Please respect copyright.PENANA8APg7ObMXx
除了遠處角落的萊爾富便利商店有光以外,四周空無一人。439Please respect copyright.PENANADwaJCnm56b
記得今天晚上,幾乎整個文學院的都去參加人擠人的跨系煙火派對了。439Please respect copyright.PENANAOqXKn4IEk7
幾乎。
不斷落下的雪花不知何時,已經停了。439Please respect copyright.PENANAlhJeB9AQsf
我抬頭望向F棟的屋頂:「High place……」
我緩緩步上屋頂。439Please respect copyright.PENANAC7RgoKn8vO
這裡的視野非常好,幾乎可以一覽四分之一個台北市了,只可惜101大樓仍被信義區一帶的山巒擋住。不過縱然如此,這地方還是很適合俯視山腳下半個校園作畫。環境清幽,沒人打擾。439Please respect copyright.PENANAH6KoRrhLnH
然而今晚這裡沒有畫,也沒有畫架。439Please respect copyright.PENANAwlzTStyJSx
只有一名曾被畫過的人,孤獨的站著。439Please respect copyright.PENANAZz93rUt5zO
她肩上積著雪,佇立在一遍雪柔的白花之中。439Please respect copyright.PENANATqAJUr79kX
那長髮背影垂著頭,望著山下那變成白色的淡暗世界。
我望著眼前屋頂上這人生絕美的畫面。439Please respect copyright.PENANAF4PeYhEgaa
深呼吸,緩緩往前踏步。439Please respect copyright.PENANAtitD1YavFb
我開口:「……太陽不見了、河裡的魚都不游了,學校裡的每個人都厚厚裹著外套圍巾快步走過,突然人們都停下了腳步。停下了腳步,抬頭望著天空。」
那背影一陣顫動。439Please respect copyright.PENANA3S70GAYCup
肩上雪堆滑落。
「像是雨,從天空落下,但沒那麼快,是用飄的,輕飄飄的落下來。人們睜大了眼睛,看著初雪,落在自己的掌心上。」我於離她距離四尺處,駐足。439Please respect copyright.PENANAQwG8lC0klS
那背影的雙肩隨著大口呼吸而上下起伏。439Please respect copyright.PENANAK5hJsnSx2x
我繼續說。
「每個人的表情像是孩子拿到第一次見到的糖果,先是用各種角度去看得仔細,接著將掌心伸到鼻子前聞一聞,最後舔一舔。」439Please respect copyright.PENANAtDUq4P5Csd
我說完,還真的將右手伸到鼻子前猛力一吸。439Please respect copyright.PENANA4t6iYKh6lw
「哎呀……是雪!」我假裝驚呼。
羅慕筠微笑的轉過身來。439Please respect copyright.PENANAzFQdScfXw2
穿著紫色厚大衣的她,模樣看起來美得驚人。439Please respect copyright.PENANALcwVSh97kx
她打開有點凍啞的嗓子,也說。
「大家都樂瘋了…每個人都樂瘋了……此刻雪花像落葉一樣落下。在水泥地上越積越多,在屋頂上越積越多,在陸橋的扶手上越積越多,逐漸,整個世界都變成白色的了………大概就是這樣,有畫面了沒?」439Please respect copyright.PENANARRdj65cCq0
439Please respect copyright.PENANA5G0CrCUkoz
我望著她那唇紅齒白的臉蛋,長長的睫毛,笑彎了的眼。439Please respect copyright.PENANACrUClZboUM
我閉起眼睛。
我說:「好美。」439Please respect copyright.PENANAD0M5ELAIuS
突然,我有一股熱淚盈眶的感覺。439Please respect copyright.PENANAfKIQDI3Rgt
羅慕筠笑著問:「好美?你是在說雪嗎!?」439Please respect copyright.PENANA91ug45R1T4
我張開雙眼。439Please respect copyright.PENANAq0rVOIPH4R
「我是在說妳。」
她的熱淚已爬滿了整張臉。439Please respect copyright.PENANAAgWdLH3OKx
我衝過去抱住她。緊緊的。439Please respect copyright.PENANAmzYyVD8hSe


