
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory559Please respect copyright.PENANACKco8rVTjt
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 559Please respect copyright.PENANAOONV1qXcdG
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.559Please respect copyright.PENANAUtOZs61dS9
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?559Please respect copyright.PENANAmgLa3zr5y8
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.559Please respect copyright.PENANA8XPOZLvX9j
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.559Please respect copyright.PENANA6SeSf2yk3D
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.559Please respect copyright.PENANAD6G4OWsnXm
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.559Please respect copyright.PENANAWyeNaNpT1g
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?559Please respect copyright.PENANAHdd1xANTOL
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.559Please respect copyright.PENANA6zQAzmAgtw
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.559Please respect copyright.PENANAtVyKQpGfGm
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.559Please respect copyright.PENANAB38gZFkAjF
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 559Please respect copyright.PENANAsP607PIKRJ
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.559Please respect copyright.PENANAG0CtRHen8M
girl bestie? - coco <3559Please respect copyright.PENANAdTL3M4cQAZ
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.559Please respect copyright.PENANAmYelhDry5g
age? - seven years old.559Please respect copyright.PENANASIYummLuyC
last person i texted? - idfk.559Please respect copyright.PENANA6PzgguL69I
last person i called? - probably my little brother.559Please respect copyright.PENANAxdYfYzzZE4
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?559Please respect copyright.PENANA8uS6TEjwPw
random fact? - i like food.559Please respect copyright.PENANADJaauYoGZz
single or taken? - big, fat taken.559Please respect copyright.PENANA3CWLxwVD1h
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.559Please respect copyright.PENANAop5lrrG6Co
first kiss? - bitch wtf?559Please respect copyright.PENANA0nDG6m0JEg
ever smoked? - nope.559Please respect copyright.PENANARjL3FeyayJ
ever done drugs? - nope~559Please respect copyright.PENANAR9wjY7ngJL
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.559Please respect copyright.PENANAx3DoTehiEb
longest relationship? - five and a half months.559Please respect copyright.PENANAwlZX79QWER
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.559Please respect copyright.PENANAG4tjGW7T9J
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.559Please respect copyright.PENANAPmBQOqjqXq
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.559Please respect copyright.PENANAB8L7FyWb0k
obsession? - kpop.559Please respect copyright.PENANAunBvc1OxHc
do you give second chances? - that depends.559Please respect copyright.PENANAHYo2bfvQQS
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?559Please respect copyright.PENANAQd5tlSqecI
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.559Please respect copyright.PENANAZ08Uex94Ou
day or night? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANAHakYC8xBbB
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANAsiPCo9dVib
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.559Please respect copyright.PENANAfar0EacNML
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.559Please respect copyright.PENANAplzng7JYUG
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.559Please respect copyright.PENANATOjnxgDWQR
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.559Please respect copyright.PENANAucTQksOvG8
favourite movie(s)? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANAhaxxABwaw9
current mood? - bored and tired.559Please respect copyright.PENANAMueaQdxQ2a
jealous of? - a lot of things.559Please respect copyright.PENANAWtvLAD3njf
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.559Please respect copyright.PENANAgTBR15Jwee
pets? - two dogs.559Please respect copyright.PENANAzBPSDyDZLN
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.559Please respect copyright.PENANAsqLvjF4eS9
favourite number? - seven.559Please respect copyright.PENANApO7Kpfpw9G
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.559Please respect copyright.PENANA8wfQixgm28
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.559Please respect copyright.PENANAG92W1Q7yxn
afraid of the dark? - yes.559Please respect copyright.PENANAqCntn29j02
one wish? - to be happy for real.559Please respect copyright.PENANAOGolXEM86E
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?559Please respect copyright.PENANABmttQ40uOt
~559Please respect copyright.PENANArEyLjh6GVR
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.559Please respect copyright.PENANAq6Eb5E3ebD
age? - i'm still seven years old.559Please respect copyright.PENANATtl2hvmxTB
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.559Please respect copyright.PENANA0cCGWNOZF6
something you hate about yourself? - my body.559Please respect copyright.PENANALVapLT6GTF
something you like about yourself? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANALmb9CGJlBJ
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.559Please respect copyright.PENANAKQjy6TnAZ4
favourite band? - bts.559Please respect copyright.PENANAeLDdmQASjR
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!559Please respect copyright.PENANA4FpHILLGP2
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.559Please respect copyright.PENANAX9UB2dYRzr
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.559Please respect copyright.PENANAglpCB2ddGT
girl crush? - emmi.559Please respect copyright.PENANA6OhEcDvwiI
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.559Please respect copyright.PENANAshjfpSoFhd
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^559Please respect copyright.PENANAd0PtgyYulC
talents? - singing.559Please respect copyright.PENANADGZITb6vQ6
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.559Please respect copyright.PENANA7h41IfND4I
someone i love? - emmi.559Please respect copyright.PENANA2OCGNsf3Ic
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.559Please respect copyright.PENANAMnFB2BmlXu
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.559Please respect copyright.PENANAa5bvHLpZV5
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.559Please respect copyright.PENANACx6QvvDjhy
favourite animal? - dogs.559Please respect copyright.PENANAmOrn9R6NtZ
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 559Please respect copyright.PENANAMDjWCEyABZ
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.559Please respect copyright.PENANAvGn6WbUeHM
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.559Please respect copyright.PENANAZQXpxOAru0
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.559Please respect copyright.PENANALBUmmZH5Jm
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.559Please respect copyright.PENANAb3yd1QU1l9
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 559Please respect copyright.PENANAdJC5mefe70
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.559Please respect copyright.PENANALaV7oLTXJV
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.559Please respect copyright.PENANAxdQzVikVVR
~559Please respect copyright.PENANAUCZTlaDUbe
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.559Please respect copyright.PENANAzqoViiQGaI
country? - i don't live on earth. 559Please respect copyright.PENANADppBIXEwXL
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.559Please respect copyright.PENANA2hiTkUpi1j
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.559Please respect copyright.PENANAUT9czbUMjz
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.559Please respect copyright.PENANAyEUPXNMsvg
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.559Please respect copyright.PENANAmMqZhutS1l
country with your favourite accent? - australia.559Please respect copyright.PENANA9cTAolaoHp
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.559Please respect copyright.PENANAFnWTIeBMv8
dog or cat person? - both.559Please respect copyright.PENANApG2SDKJ17b
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.559Please respect copyright.PENANAEk1A2MDQMn
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.559Please respect copyright.PENANAAfuKdQko3j
do you belive in God? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANACbnU4ylj1J
single or taken? - taken.559Please respect copyright.PENANA2n1TBz1Mwy
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*559Please respect copyright.PENANApFniHlL1aY
birthday year? - 1930.559Please respect copyright.PENANAi57bZQXKix
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.559Please respect copyright.PENANAgkMP3Pyqxl
age? - what's that?559Please respect copyright.PENANAmOzUYMIwHz
enthinicity? - african american.559Please respect copyright.PENANAR46MkXEvPV
tea or coffee? - neither.559Please respect copyright.PENANAVBr4Fo6N2R
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.559Please respect copyright.PENANAflM8BpmSXQ
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*559Please respect copyright.PENANA7Uwi6nm1XJ
favourite food? - ice cream.559Please respect copyright.PENANAbnImoDut6x
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 559Please respect copyright.PENANATASQIdkL7i
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.559Please respect copyright.PENANArMjTACQM7F
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.559Please respect copyright.PENANAFynnunB9qR
favourite soda? - sprite.559Please respect copyright.PENANAKtYA03ivhk
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.559Please respect copyright.PENANAYYsnsfvA5J
can you swim? - yes, wtf?559Please respect copyright.PENANAyOi0byFPJ7
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.559Please respect copyright.PENANAsyDSXB3A9I
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.559Please respect copyright.PENANAxJqj9kKDPi
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.559Please respect copyright.PENANAP1NYrd4r3j
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.559Please respect copyright.PENANAgkWVacJSYS
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*559Please respect copyright.PENANAMfUH8Ek9Th
apple or andriod? - apple.559Please respect copyright.PENANA6Wu79Ve4La
best dessert? - mochi.559Please respect copyright.PENANAcP5WacYCBU
~559Please respect copyright.PENANAuyf8to7sbZ
have you ever:559Please respect copyright.PENANAAlzDGI0QhG
1. skipped class? - yes.559Please respect copyright.PENANAb6Po6U50vi
2. done drugs? - no.559Please respect copyright.PENANAytzTyZrxMR
3. self-harmed? - yes.559Please respect copyright.PENANA49uLq0Wjyd
4. drank? - no.559Please respect copyright.PENANAXdRvOg0sOq
5. shoplifted? - yes.559Please respect copyright.PENANA56fUPPtLJE
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.559Please respect copyright.PENANA36LyXbi7zf
7. broken up with someone? - yes.559Please respect copyright.PENANAShVx8xij97
what's your favourite:559Please respect copyright.PENANAr4iw8j5Seu
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.559Please respect copyright.PENANA9QQqXdXyua
9. movie? - break the silence.559Please respect copyright.PENANANr8JT9JWOV
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.559Please respect copyright.PENANAzgHJtlaYCH
11. artist? - bts.559Please respect copyright.PENANA8i4jwoEvYk
12. singer or band? - bts.559Please respect copyright.PENANAgYP5uvM6A7
13. memory? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANA3N5UrQ9wMS
14. book? - the cruel prince.559Please respect copyright.PENANASJ3DwfJIwT
this or that:559Please respect copyright.PENANAuxtnx2hdbw
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.559Please respect copyright.PENANAEifT6G2GLS
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.559Please respect copyright.PENANAFPzywMFfZq
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.559Please respect copyright.PENANAUlooUcyiFK
18. movies or books? - idk.559Please respect copyright.PENANAK9pAXnaYjf
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.559Please respect copyright.PENANABJ59F70yi9
20. blind of deaf? - blind.559Please respect copyright.PENANAeOz9VUHusd
21. tea or coffee? - neither.559Please respect copyright.PENANASu17obNz8v
what's your:559Please respect copyright.PENANACQj4CsAITK
22. age? - ninety-one.559Please respect copyright.PENANAIlfnqhl2e6
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.559Please respect copyright.PENANAe0zOtC016m
24. height? - 4'11.559Please respect copyright.PENANAmFJ6hXXJxa
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.559Please respect copyright.PENANAobl6UHOCgG
26. shoe size? - seven.559Please respect copyright.PENANAsGWPQLLMio
27. religion? - i'm not religious.559Please respect copyright.PENANAWmSsHNEIFW
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.559Please respect copyright.PENANABAfLhVtspY
opinion on: 559Please respect copyright.PENANAp8GNfrDVmQ
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...559Please respect copyright.PENANAU5JY8MDqqs
30. second chances? - it depends.559Please respect copyright.PENANAGmY6DtmrD0
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.559Please respect copyright.PENANABycCu3eWIL
32. abortion? - ew.559Please respect copyright.PENANAobkb74NGRL
33. a death penalty? - ew.559Please respect copyright.PENANA3oqH799dMW
34. marijuana? - i likes that.559Please respect copyright.PENANA5Et9HAX0Rz
35. love? - what's love?559Please respect copyright.PENANA4POH4PAQ6c
do you:559Please respect copyright.PENANAnAbpoBQk4T
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.559Please respect copyright.PENANAsD44ingaei
559Please respect copyright.PENANAQmDXf4yMwH
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3559Please respect copyright.PENANAXw2QVWTIUZ