
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory515Please respect copyright.PENANAe2HZWI2VF3
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 515Please respect copyright.PENANAFmLRcrVquC
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.515Please respect copyright.PENANAKfVSdzvBln
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?515Please respect copyright.PENANAfOIPRRiSND
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.515Please respect copyright.PENANA7ruMZRgFSw
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.515Please respect copyright.PENANArjFGXjrVQz
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.515Please respect copyright.PENANAxdl3mfhgeK
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.515Please respect copyright.PENANAft9lApVTpf
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?515Please respect copyright.PENANAWgryLVT5BY
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.515Please respect copyright.PENANAvJW3rpKjq8
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.515Please respect copyright.PENANA5JceRkB6Wd
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.515Please respect copyright.PENANA081MQUixX8
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 515Please respect copyright.PENANAndlAZW7va5
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.515Please respect copyright.PENANA7RXfCJHOSc
girl bestie? - coco <3515Please respect copyright.PENANAMZNPXtNGqF
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.515Please respect copyright.PENANA5MTOblQFYh
age? - seven years old.515Please respect copyright.PENANAbSHyHQQSMl
last person i texted? - idfk.515Please respect copyright.PENANAoKdfc6bPPk
last person i called? - probably my little brother.515Please respect copyright.PENANA66ShRBlROu
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?515Please respect copyright.PENANAzWvPADlHpC
random fact? - i like food.515Please respect copyright.PENANAAqNi1PAJPK
single or taken? - big, fat taken.515Please respect copyright.PENANAlmNtHZrVV8
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.515Please respect copyright.PENANAaC3XGkDWdt
first kiss? - bitch wtf?515Please respect copyright.PENANA9gXV5y6yt8
ever smoked? - nope.515Please respect copyright.PENANAUc7bbxPhTU
ever done drugs? - nope~515Please respect copyright.PENANApTUSvQ5D4i
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.515Please respect copyright.PENANAqwq8CzJ126
longest relationship? - five and a half months.515Please respect copyright.PENANAPy4pRhQZHh
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.515Please respect copyright.PENANAtl7Z7phdCn
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.515Please respect copyright.PENANARHwl2hVOaq
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.515Please respect copyright.PENANA5dVc63kH5Z
obsession? - kpop.515Please respect copyright.PENANAksLxX5v1ac
do you give second chances? - that depends.515Please respect copyright.PENANACa5yxCFP0j
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?515Please respect copyright.PENANAgCq71KfdwJ
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.515Please respect copyright.PENANA8Hie8aayds
day or night? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANAaotQRdN1cs
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANApkOJvWt5Ox
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.515Please respect copyright.PENANA2J2vJxySUU
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.515Please respect copyright.PENANA1lqn8ZN1F8
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.515Please respect copyright.PENANAS6LFc2c3mT
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.515Please respect copyright.PENANAbXM2hWbI1u
favourite movie(s)? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANAaxfuaxtn1i
current mood? - bored and tired.515Please respect copyright.PENANAzaBbWhLxCZ
jealous of? - a lot of things.515Please respect copyright.PENANAqaPODLmlxq
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.515Please respect copyright.PENANABFV3zeIZwJ
pets? - two dogs.515Please respect copyright.PENANAv3cwC0q8hF
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.515Please respect copyright.PENANA92QPqnfxKn
favourite number? - seven.515Please respect copyright.PENANAapu2ndsi6r
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.515Please respect copyright.PENANADxzQJmNIST
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.515Please respect copyright.PENANAf7VNnOTh9p
afraid of the dark? - yes.515Please respect copyright.PENANAtm5ud1bTK6
one wish? - to be happy for real.515Please respect copyright.PENANA2dJOS1tWNZ
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?515Please respect copyright.PENANAYyr8oajvHB
~515Please respect copyright.PENANAZpMJfEqviH
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.515Please respect copyright.PENANAjw2LSaSAgH
age? - i'm still seven years old.515Please respect copyright.PENANAIOLefVN2jy
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.515Please respect copyright.PENANAgTlbQzoha3
something you hate about yourself? - my body.515Please respect copyright.PENANA7ac98krKJl
something you like about yourself? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANAseAlUb68yV
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.515Please respect copyright.PENANA9lC95yaVxJ
favourite band? - bts.515Please respect copyright.PENANA32aKmbaajQ
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!515Please respect copyright.PENANAmZH9Z05VdX
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.515Please respect copyright.PENANA2HSNz1mOt6
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.515Please respect copyright.PENANAS41TqQqlg0
girl crush? - emmi.515Please respect copyright.PENANAehjJbWECj5
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.515Please respect copyright.PENANAYTUTfLBpJW
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^515Please respect copyright.PENANA2F774fDny9
talents? - singing.515Please respect copyright.PENANAbcQrmuJlFN
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.515Please respect copyright.PENANAih01cYJ1Df
someone i love? - emmi.515Please respect copyright.PENANApB1oDD4VMi
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.515Please respect copyright.PENANAs8xmcd2oic
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.515Please respect copyright.PENANAIOiXGyvHhx
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.515Please respect copyright.PENANAevjTvTWiw5
favourite animal? - dogs.515Please respect copyright.PENANAZ1hTu42WEw
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 515Please respect copyright.PENANAHDYvEzSHUK
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.515Please respect copyright.PENANAlVtNM4AHeS
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.515Please respect copyright.PENANAbnkyy6YsIJ
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.515Please respect copyright.PENANASLTxfOm2gL
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.515Please respect copyright.PENANA26VbYdAiWM
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 515Please respect copyright.PENANA26Z6EAPdSZ
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.515Please respect copyright.PENANArwinkI8cha
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.515Please respect copyright.PENANAtn3Nig3dBO
~515Please respect copyright.PENANADLS4tP3nAX
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.515Please respect copyright.PENANAZU6VMd5nMC
country? - i don't live on earth. 515Please respect copyright.PENANA9cLFfxkfPM
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.515Please respect copyright.PENANAWWJnCjc8Ur
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.515Please respect copyright.PENANA3iq2Gyp1CM
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.515Please respect copyright.PENANAJzPNmY6zCH
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.515Please respect copyright.PENANAZlzE6Knjiz
country with your favourite accent? - australia.515Please respect copyright.PENANAs5tQsslE6v
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.515Please respect copyright.PENANAjnREIESlvi
dog or cat person? - both.515Please respect copyright.PENANAiAuTb3N4bV
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.515Please respect copyright.PENANA6axPASBYqT
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.515Please respect copyright.PENANA4ABEGWUZ1x
do you belive in God? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANA9ygnVt64a1
single or taken? - taken.515Please respect copyright.PENANAlmOv2zxO8u
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*515Please respect copyright.PENANAMT9gxnuWHq
birthday year? - 1930.515Please respect copyright.PENANAMWjt1kwilY
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.515Please respect copyright.PENANAb70h7zoSEo
age? - what's that?515Please respect copyright.PENANADt4z2IljK0
enthinicity? - african american.515Please respect copyright.PENANARFIt6GaxwL
tea or coffee? - neither.515Please respect copyright.PENANAhVCRNQPrqJ
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.515Please respect copyright.PENANAS4B6QUAtz3
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*515Please respect copyright.PENANAs4XJAjSL3F
favourite food? - ice cream.515Please respect copyright.PENANAeziYmXuNZ6
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 515Please respect copyright.PENANA624FpT1W1s
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.515Please respect copyright.PENANAcxwfZqnLbZ
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.515Please respect copyright.PENANA8GH0YGkTwz
favourite soda? - sprite.515Please respect copyright.PENANA9HEvDWgaII
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.515Please respect copyright.PENANAzeioNVKYCP
can you swim? - yes, wtf?515Please respect copyright.PENANAX4zXaSQywA
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.515Please respect copyright.PENANAGvaMfiAmas
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.515Please respect copyright.PENANA8FghEafhFN
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.515Please respect copyright.PENANAayQNBHsh5u
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.515Please respect copyright.PENANAER52IkbOBe
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*515Please respect copyright.PENANADtdo0CtYC8
apple or andriod? - apple.515Please respect copyright.PENANAU7bb58qwaL
best dessert? - mochi.515Please respect copyright.PENANAhZ8Mg7kU5j
~515Please respect copyright.PENANAGNfoblfYH8
have you ever:515Please respect copyright.PENANAE1yAIqRJ6U
1. skipped class? - yes.515Please respect copyright.PENANATwdS1C5yUr
2. done drugs? - no.515Please respect copyright.PENANA0yV4FnvsW6
3. self-harmed? - yes.515Please respect copyright.PENANAh2YBVJDIFs
4. drank? - no.515Please respect copyright.PENANABroSjUQsxe
5. shoplifted? - yes.515Please respect copyright.PENANA3B9vbJSngJ
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.515Please respect copyright.PENANA5LDSHetjiA
7. broken up with someone? - yes.515Please respect copyright.PENANAmy72AvNYno
what's your favourite:515Please respect copyright.PENANAmHNbq6ECrV
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.515Please respect copyright.PENANAfJbSMEFWr6
9. movie? - break the silence.515Please respect copyright.PENANAiMyhMXP0VM
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.515Please respect copyright.PENANACNoWCXOhM5
11. artist? - bts.515Please respect copyright.PENANAYY133hlepv
12. singer or band? - bts.515Please respect copyright.PENANAaOwYkpSodg
13. memory? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANA2fWxEw58KF
14. book? - the cruel prince.515Please respect copyright.PENANAv33IDTfMLB
this or that:515Please respect copyright.PENANAwavo4jlKsl
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.515Please respect copyright.PENANA7UpAMrUJ4q
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.515Please respect copyright.PENANAtTqkYMbXWA
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.515Please respect copyright.PENANAZr662ogP7h
18. movies or books? - idk.515Please respect copyright.PENANAwCdKxcfs1K
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.515Please respect copyright.PENANAFJ2WP3jwCy
20. blind of deaf? - blind.515Please respect copyright.PENANAcbaWIuaoJ3
21. tea or coffee? - neither.515Please respect copyright.PENANAUzdRmdh4UF
what's your:515Please respect copyright.PENANAYR2irdJEUM
22. age? - ninety-one.515Please respect copyright.PENANAcRVOXRQCoR
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.515Please respect copyright.PENANAURyBYfu8rF
24. height? - 4'11.515Please respect copyright.PENANA1Gj4dYDkQJ
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.515Please respect copyright.PENANAb0ysN015gl
26. shoe size? - seven.515Please respect copyright.PENANALrfxSUIp3t
27. religion? - i'm not religious.515Please respect copyright.PENANAJC2qrNvLsu
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.515Please respect copyright.PENANAbYaqF3hwFg
opinion on: 515Please respect copyright.PENANAPOIZbwlZLo
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...515Please respect copyright.PENANAJqMgRAzfYs
30. second chances? - it depends.515Please respect copyright.PENANAfwUYJtT2DL
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.515Please respect copyright.PENANA5qlUbLYguQ
32. abortion? - ew.515Please respect copyright.PENANABqQnZajUAL
33. a death penalty? - ew.515Please respect copyright.PENANAjGuT16ORLi
34. marijuana? - i likes that.515Please respect copyright.PENANAhciawNZm1s
35. love? - what's love?515Please respect copyright.PENANAvL8GsgPiYO
do you:515Please respect copyright.PENANAeN0HPg2YQQ
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.515Please respect copyright.PENANAai9Y2LocyT
515Please respect copyright.PENANA1Gh4C4RaG8
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3515Please respect copyright.PENANAp9oVVGSejW