
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory527Please respect copyright.PENANATmgyowOFml
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 527Please respect copyright.PENANA4vRziuLsji
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.527Please respect copyright.PENANA2U81POVlDH
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?527Please respect copyright.PENANAZiTTzHUgoP
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.527Please respect copyright.PENANAvNSszU8NEu
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.527Please respect copyright.PENANAjykFGsQ7ca
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.527Please respect copyright.PENANAmpP3bCEZok
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.527Please respect copyright.PENANAZhsDywUW9g
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?527Please respect copyright.PENANA5ctwaITgmh
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.527Please respect copyright.PENANAMZuXrtbRZv
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.527Please respect copyright.PENANAfhucVgflVH
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.527Please respect copyright.PENANAxAn8wC2Fc1
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 527Please respect copyright.PENANA1eXW2mtx6k
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.527Please respect copyright.PENANAa0r1EoqOVO
girl bestie? - coco <3527Please respect copyright.PENANA8ElZxE5raM
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.527Please respect copyright.PENANAKEFNF9g8Ny
age? - seven years old.527Please respect copyright.PENANAdbAil800QE
last person i texted? - idfk.527Please respect copyright.PENANAS2BbjwgatC
last person i called? - probably my little brother.527Please respect copyright.PENANAbXv03qmE5o
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?527Please respect copyright.PENANAjmZDV2tUec
random fact? - i like food.527Please respect copyright.PENANAHqOmgCC2P8
single or taken? - big, fat taken.527Please respect copyright.PENANAG25N9Rpm8z
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.527Please respect copyright.PENANApjl5kkRhOI
first kiss? - bitch wtf?527Please respect copyright.PENANAKHtZg6qL1m
ever smoked? - nope.527Please respect copyright.PENANAwyJ30pxrwf
ever done drugs? - nope~527Please respect copyright.PENANAHi66gIWXz6
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.527Please respect copyright.PENANAE3C9uqyRU8
longest relationship? - five and a half months.527Please respect copyright.PENANAMCDyQAsGhS
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.527Please respect copyright.PENANAhwN5pGawP9
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.527Please respect copyright.PENANAkzjxfRLXnN
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.527Please respect copyright.PENANAocgt4pMozR
obsession? - kpop.527Please respect copyright.PENANALuAAvL51Qt
do you give second chances? - that depends.527Please respect copyright.PENANAHVABifBtJX
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?527Please respect copyright.PENANAQCB88IeTwF
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.527Please respect copyright.PENANAMrMYNmVIq1
day or night? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANA4Ot6f3368w
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANA3Xf2BbgHoM
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.527Please respect copyright.PENANARHHEPgLfEZ
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.527Please respect copyright.PENANAtEn9M8pKtZ
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.527Please respect copyright.PENANAHUrPQrYXIj
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.527Please respect copyright.PENANAQJi1okYQLk
favourite movie(s)? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANAANMcslIeCv
current mood? - bored and tired.527Please respect copyright.PENANAgT7kEkumf1
jealous of? - a lot of things.527Please respect copyright.PENANA3axJXccNIw
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.527Please respect copyright.PENANALSA0hA6Y16
pets? - two dogs.527Please respect copyright.PENANAZAxhKLl6SC
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.527Please respect copyright.PENANAl3fokcrEXB
favourite number? - seven.527Please respect copyright.PENANAYHs8UbnZ1K
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.527Please respect copyright.PENANA7TDwJd8Xf1
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.527Please respect copyright.PENANALFWNoUSA3N
afraid of the dark? - yes.527Please respect copyright.PENANAQSsaEoqKn2
one wish? - to be happy for real.527Please respect copyright.PENANAFz3HZsD93F
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?527Please respect copyright.PENANA6ixwxLMzrx
~527Please respect copyright.PENANAPGZ3DUn2Oq
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.527Please respect copyright.PENANAxTS9pALiik
age? - i'm still seven years old.527Please respect copyright.PENANAtwj5oy2AUf
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.527Please respect copyright.PENANAsbquis0w4f
something you hate about yourself? - my body.527Please respect copyright.PENANAqm5ATdlXCg
something you like about yourself? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANAqIjkzq2lIB
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.527Please respect copyright.PENANA9VExHXtW4h
favourite band? - bts.527Please respect copyright.PENANAXQ3IO3PKji
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!527Please respect copyright.PENANA4Cz7reD9Qx
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.527Please respect copyright.PENANAPzW4hxtqYi
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.527Please respect copyright.PENANAdX4WjqlfEV
girl crush? - emmi.527Please respect copyright.PENANAYFoxMChHtW
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.527Please respect copyright.PENANAJa6AqTlqYD
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^527Please respect copyright.PENANAqEHCwNpQbI
talents? - singing.527Please respect copyright.PENANAUap6PIdJFj
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.527Please respect copyright.PENANAsx8pS4DAgZ
someone i love? - emmi.527Please respect copyright.PENANAXycrDpVxuk
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.527Please respect copyright.PENANADXLRHiwbid
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.527Please respect copyright.PENANA517qH91zfd
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.527Please respect copyright.PENANAMBM4ADk3za
favourite animal? - dogs.527Please respect copyright.PENANArnciqxQhwW
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 527Please respect copyright.PENANAarCvWF9zWD
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.527Please respect copyright.PENANAvsrKzTZqMy
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.527Please respect copyright.PENANAjOE8z0AfFo
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.527Please respect copyright.PENANAtH64Zane0m
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.527Please respect copyright.PENANAYoG2AHKRo9
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 527Please respect copyright.PENANAj6etbtrhdK
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.527Please respect copyright.PENANA6uPJqZck15
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.527Please respect copyright.PENANAaGjEiaVyLK
~527Please respect copyright.PENANAWd7c327Vmk
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.527Please respect copyright.PENANA3krzqOWdMF
country? - i don't live on earth. 527Please respect copyright.PENANA3qQPYF3NBA
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.527Please respect copyright.PENANAQxFTMIFQBH
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.527Please respect copyright.PENANAiedMVNu098
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.527Please respect copyright.PENANAmjfN5WE0Zp
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.527Please respect copyright.PENANAkQXXngQAn6
country with your favourite accent? - australia.527Please respect copyright.PENANAZViAEg1VSR
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.527Please respect copyright.PENANA8VVkUGeb1A
dog or cat person? - both.527Please respect copyright.PENANAeefwidJQlM
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.527Please respect copyright.PENANA36jjqd4YAP
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.527Please respect copyright.PENANAqZHAovEYQM
do you belive in God? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANAbyqrNS5DxX
single or taken? - taken.527Please respect copyright.PENANA7OgwgDDTB1
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*527Please respect copyright.PENANAubWTh0nfp4
birthday year? - 1930.527Please respect copyright.PENANAndalPck2SO
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.527Please respect copyright.PENANATl06mhkthj
age? - what's that?527Please respect copyright.PENANAOBXvwHsbWc
enthinicity? - african american.527Please respect copyright.PENANAY3KeARlCd4
tea or coffee? - neither.527Please respect copyright.PENANAP3J0u3j538
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.527Please respect copyright.PENANAwQ5TBSs4ux
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*527Please respect copyright.PENANA0AgFNxW78q
favourite food? - ice cream.527Please respect copyright.PENANA9FPK6UPR8J
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 527Please respect copyright.PENANAJfP4IhjiLn
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.527Please respect copyright.PENANAnHHovfrh2G
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.527Please respect copyright.PENANAZCrEjxMq1Z
favourite soda? - sprite.527Please respect copyright.PENANAWE5Q7mLODg
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.527Please respect copyright.PENANA1nVwpPVHWN
can you swim? - yes, wtf?527Please respect copyright.PENANAy0KVbZ7DJq
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.527Please respect copyright.PENANAYUzmLdKaSA
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.527Please respect copyright.PENANA0peA1keClD
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.527Please respect copyright.PENANAIDyOiOJtrR
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.527Please respect copyright.PENANACEp5TSRbZN
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*527Please respect copyright.PENANAgjQnqFp3kn
apple or andriod? - apple.527Please respect copyright.PENANA8R92CSMkVQ
best dessert? - mochi.527Please respect copyright.PENANAnbSnWFavF9
~527Please respect copyright.PENANA9gRWR4KMKl
have you ever:527Please respect copyright.PENANATctqh9mD8B
1. skipped class? - yes.527Please respect copyright.PENANAYilmx9jLLm
2. done drugs? - no.527Please respect copyright.PENANApcJ59wfKhc
3. self-harmed? - yes.527Please respect copyright.PENANA9Z9bwkM98y
4. drank? - no.527Please respect copyright.PENANAEcRr5d7ZCM
5. shoplifted? - yes.527Please respect copyright.PENANA4oOONfNl38
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.527Please respect copyright.PENANAQePd4csGCh
7. broken up with someone? - yes.527Please respect copyright.PENANAwZsYRouXbu
what's your favourite:527Please respect copyright.PENANAeyDvZIW31N
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.527Please respect copyright.PENANAfylgrGnJzm
9. movie? - break the silence.527Please respect copyright.PENANATeaRvXicwf
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.527Please respect copyright.PENANAXLfA2zj71G
11. artist? - bts.527Please respect copyright.PENANAVqtWCishfv
12. singer or band? - bts.527Please respect copyright.PENANAYAjBcZmM20
13. memory? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANANJ8v3X2mMG
14. book? - the cruel prince.527Please respect copyright.PENANAaNNz373nSB
this or that:527Please respect copyright.PENANAZh2piUpAtv
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.527Please respect copyright.PENANA0U5BN38tRc
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.527Please respect copyright.PENANAPF06bp5esS
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.527Please respect copyright.PENANARmNyUNXFYx
18. movies or books? - idk.527Please respect copyright.PENANAqNFbgC0zXf
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.527Please respect copyright.PENANA87zgBsdcPH
20. blind of deaf? - blind.527Please respect copyright.PENANA6RqKXV8X9H
21. tea or coffee? - neither.527Please respect copyright.PENANAVpkRM5MXHe
what's your:527Please respect copyright.PENANA5eENqG5rBS
22. age? - ninety-one.527Please respect copyright.PENANAUhyBJmkmEI
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.527Please respect copyright.PENANA3qjAmX7VRM
24. height? - 4'11.527Please respect copyright.PENANAClVippVIZN
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.527Please respect copyright.PENANAr5OoDLo2b6
26. shoe size? - seven.527Please respect copyright.PENANAeYvXKBXUZ6
27. religion? - i'm not religious.527Please respect copyright.PENANAmUOi2iHNB5
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.527Please respect copyright.PENANAOjw8bLDnaW
opinion on: 527Please respect copyright.PENANAzO9GDu83wF
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...527Please respect copyright.PENANAQSv7e2KxNq
30. second chances? - it depends.527Please respect copyright.PENANA9bWQ7ous0e
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.527Please respect copyright.PENANAp1kwR6Gong
32. abortion? - ew.527Please respect copyright.PENANATxgDyHz2wV
33. a death penalty? - ew.527Please respect copyright.PENANAx1SKl91Azb
34. marijuana? - i likes that.527Please respect copyright.PENANA6b3ovKLj35
35. love? - what's love?527Please respect copyright.PENANAB73I2TNqxZ
do you:527Please respect copyright.PENANA1f1k97TemH
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.527Please respect copyright.PENANAxpfwrblJrv
527Please respect copyright.PENANA26IEQcKfPA
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3527Please respect copyright.PENANAxk3eGfzUnS