[我們做的東西才不會爆炸]658Please respect copyright.PENANA8lXcP94Cgu
658Please respect copyright.PENANApBNXEFaNft
地精跟哥布林是一體同源只是稱呼上有差別,不過可以了解的是它們做的東西都會爆炸。658Please respect copyright.PENANAdn785bQrgd
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqGzzqVkTlN
地精跟侏儒不一樣,不過名稱常搞混,還有侏儒做得東西不會爆炸。658Please respect copyright.PENANAU6vlndRh7M
658Please respect copyright.PENANAK0GfQj5205
這座島上有一堆侏儒跟地精,地精總以為他們跟侏儒是同種人,而對岸的哥布林認為地精跟它們是同族,地精又說侏儒跟它們同族,所以哥布林跟侏儒應該是同族。658Please respect copyright.PENANAa7epsQ3kil
658Please respect copyright.PENANAe0Y1BV5BI9
侏儒心裡很明白我們不是地精也不是哥布林,而且侏儒也知道我們做的東西才不會爆炸。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2g6l0ig0Pp
658Please respect copyright.PENANAkVwN7QSpi0
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAewYzTbi6eA
658Please respect copyright.PENANAoB5fllo9j1
地精做的東西都會爆炸,所以他們認為爆炸是很正常的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAq6jxa3sZAC
658Please respect copyright.PENANATu9ndqVaiS
侏儒可不這麼認為,會爆炸就代表是瑕疵品,會爆炸就可能有死傷。658Please respect copyright.PENANALisk4olf4t
658Please respect copyright.PENANARf4NCNS2QM
有一陣子地精跟侏儒在爭吵「半永續魔石能源爐」的設置。658Please respect copyright.PENANAdLMr7RQvlz
658Please respect copyright.PENANAsWUd4qyBVH
這實在是時代的錯誤,地精那偉大的先代大酋長(已故)妄想開發出可以打倒哥布林酋長的魔法兵器,而這種魔法兵器需要半永續魔法能源爐排出的廢礦。658Please respect copyright.PENANABssv7JIxYD
658Please respect copyright.PENANADxFwocOSc4
所以地精們一口氣蓋了三座舊型爐,現在還想蓋第四座。要不是後來東方的精靈大人察覺了大酋長的野心,恐怕現在島上已經十幾座了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVl0xNyuQfj
658Please respect copyright.PENANAYvzaxPq3ej
後來好不容易地精們有機會做第四座,可是這下侏儒們就不爽了,這島就這麼小,只要其中一個能源爐爆炸大概會有一半的地方受到汙染不能住人,你還想蓋第四座?658Please respect copyright.PENANAE6BsSCvLRF
658Please respect copyright.PENANAyQaryNj9de
這是想留島不留侏儒嗎?658Please respect copyright.PENANA1EWyYICLvb
658Please respect copyright.PENANAKyy2QqlnN1
地精當然不這麼想,爆炸很正常,它們反而覺得前三座能源爐不爆炸太不正常了,這一定是侏儒們細心維護的結果。658Please respect copyright.PENANAz7ag2DA0m4
658Please respect copyright.PENANAIxGSleFIQ6
這不符合地精的風格,是的地精把東西蓋完就不管了,基本上的維護都是侏儒來做的。658Please respect copyright.PENANATWsSRfpW5x
658Please respect copyright.PENANAdtfRwXwaAY
誰叫侏儒是個有責任感的種族呢?更不用說,有些侏儒為了這件事還被其他侏儒當成叛徒呢。658Please respect copyright.PENANA8n3mKsqvjD
658Please respect copyright.PENANAWyQcUlajwR
就不想想真要爆炸了是算在誰身上?倒楣的還是侏儒啊。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVehR0AMptk
658Please respect copyright.PENANA72HxNrWULZ
至於地精?他們大不了爆炸了回去西方跟哥布林們討生活而已,侏儒可是沒地方可去了,但那又跟地精們何干呢?658Please respect copyright.PENANAfrpyVMbvr6
658Please respect copyright.PENANAhKlA2DLzJP
地精向來就是自私的,只想到自己的事,就跟哥布林一樣。658Please respect copyright.PENANA8pOao8noae
658Please respect copyright.PENANAU1luW6Z7up
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAQJcFnMSUgg
658Please respect copyright.PENANAWhZFnDywEi
其實追根究柢,地精做的東西會爆炸跟它們的民族性脫不了關係。658Please respect copyright.PENANAnlfYRmEtca
658Please respect copyright.PENANAs63lcXmbGE
他們真的很容易搞混東西,可以把攝氏十度跟十公分單位搞混,當然不用期待他們做的東西品質良好。658Please respect copyright.PENANAyzQPvUlG7E
658Please respect copyright.PENANAfsZju6sHk4
侏儒都知道魔法道具的品質跟製作者的數學觀念好壞有很大的關連性,這個很重要的概念,地精是沒有的。658Please respect copyright.PENANA8k8dJh6VTt
658Please respect copyright.PENANASjgNP8iECJ
「只要看起來沒問題就行了,你們怎麼這麼挑?」658Please respect copyright.PENANAJjleeA3SLG
658Please respect copyright.PENANABQ7rvaACfh
這是地精最喜歡掛在嘴邊的話,當然,哥布林也喜歡。658Please respect copyright.PENANAd0UWa3JaS4
658Please respect copyright.PENANAHWGGsroqns
所以說,只要看起來沒問題的話,地精根本不在意那麼多,當然囉,嗜錢如命的地精只要能夠節省成本,標準要多寬就會有多寬。658Please respect copyright.PENANAE3Jco1y2r8
658Please respect copyright.PENANABffeJ3PDUW
最有名的莫過於某件假油製造案。658Please respect copyright.PENANAt3Jj9BJQri
658Please respect copyright.PENANAhHXzl8rQ7t
大家都知道食用油跟煉金術合成後得到的廢油產物是不同的,前者能吃,後者不能吃。658Please respect copyright.PENANAKHnyqeHtbg
658Please respect copyright.PENANA2rqtLDWJyo
有個地精商人不知道哪來的點子,竟然回收煉金術合成後的廢油重新精煉調味,製造出看起來可以吃的食用油。658Please respect copyright.PENANA0hpmAAgJoo
658Please respect copyright.PENANAYXr45s49SQ
這新聞被好事的妖精們爆料出來後,侏儒紛紛發起了對這位地精商人的抵制運動。658Please respect copyright.PENANAQXjAIcmp0S
658Please respect copyright.PENANAwsK0jhLTR9
那時候人心惶惶,倒是一堆地精拿那些廢油再製品炸東西,賣給不知情的侏儒跟外地人。658Please respect copyright.PENANA33xzFkJNK8
658Please respect copyright.PENANAJwubgyXLlc
不為什麼,就是便宜啊。天然的食用油算是加工品,會消耗大量的橄欖或牲畜。但煉金術廢油一開始就是不用錢了,甚至餘回收廢油,煉金術師還得另外付一筆錢給你。658Please respect copyright.PENANAJJgbrDjGAF
658Please respect copyright.PENANAHFIjULjrav
無本生意是人人做,有了一個就會有第二個,等到妖精們把消息都傳出去後,侏儒們才知道這十幾年它們吃的東西到底有多噁心。658Please respect copyright.PENANAvURH5y1tAt
658Please respect copyright.PENANAztpwEH2qDg
可是那些地精哪管這些?這錢賺得可爽了,看起來能吃就行了,檢驗也符合標準啊!658Please respect copyright.PENANA2xqoAtEumv
658Please respect copyright.PENANAeshJNn9B1C
大多數的地精都是這樣想著:658Please respect copyright.PENANAzqmsvdYaWw
658Please respect copyright.PENANALRN0bBKs3u
侏儒們的身體太弱了,才會拒絕吃這種油,真是沒出息。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2VduAGQORu
658Please respect copyright.PENANAHdx54ZhFqf
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAGplnXYgC1K
658Please respect copyright.PENANAWAFqvRzXL8
如果你以為地精們都是笨蛋,那你就錯了。所有的地精都有其狡猾的一面,小看它們可是會吃不完兜著走。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2oXmPdSGMO
658Please respect copyright.PENANAZGf4ee1CXq
事實上,地精的數字觀念並不輸給侏儒。只不過他們在意的數字只跟金錢有關,與金錢無關的數字他們是會選擇性無視的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAQVrZYEKoNt
658Please respect copyright.PENANAWP8UGhCyXV
地精對自己子女最常問的問題是:658Please respect copyright.PENANApOFTo9gdJL
658Please respect copyright.PENANAudBzTH2xjc
「你做這個有甚麼用?是能賺到錢嗎?」658Please respect copyright.PENANATkHhcyxcLq
658Please respect copyright.PENANAIdR1S4J5sw
這句話就是地精的核心價值,對它們來說有沒有用跟他能不能賺到錢有關。658Please respect copyright.PENANAokHKHXJbvz
658Please respect copyright.PENANAmrGgaQ82IE
所以賠錢貨跟無法賺錢的東西都是沒有用的廢物,是可以捨棄的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAn6A7zMlwcs
658Please respect copyright.PENANAeLlymQMA34
並不是說錢不重要,侏儒也很重視錢,沒有金錢很多事都做不到。658Please respect copyright.PENANAERsupPbnlJ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAfTqPoe9Y7h
每一個有理智的侏儒都知道,金錢只是一個工具,它不能成為一個價值觀。658Please respect copyright.PENANA4nV4U8Pd2r
658Please respect copyright.PENANAAUmTOlrY65
但是對地精來說,金錢就是它們的價值觀。658Please respect copyright.PENANA1urcAUSeiA
658Please respect copyright.PENANAE2b5yJecyX
為了金錢,它們可以犧牲一切,包括自己在內。658Please respect copyright.PENANAgnIOneYUP0
658Please respect copyright.PENANAQOcJGwhMqI
當然我們不能說這樣的價值觀是錯誤的,但是搭配上地精的差不多先生民族性,這就很要命了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAls19dBJsNg
658Please respect copyright.PENANAmurd4xWXXJ
魔法工業用酒精跟食用酒是差不多的,可是魔法工業用酒精很便宜,我們就拿這個當酒來賣吧!658Please respect copyright.PENANAc7kIj2ONE6
658Please respect copyright.PENANAmM0z6EkZ2b
魔法工業用明礬跟可食用明礬看起來一樣,可是魔法工業用明礬比較便宜,所以我們就…658Please respect copyright.PENANAo572mA4AXY
658Please respect copyright.PENANAGxCVnA5o5n
塑化劑跟起雲劑加到食物裡面造成的效果看起來差不多,可是塑化劑比較便宜,所以我們就…658Please respect copyright.PENANA1e9Z9A3nLC
658Please respect copyright.PENANAfqa9ovibOW
嘿!地精的難兄難弟哥布林們也常幹一樣的事情,看他們之前把魔法變出來的毒牛奶當成真的牛奶賣就…658Please respect copyright.PENANAGCFVls8qFH
658Please respect copyright.PENANAxkfhIhJSjo
這些層出不窮的案例不是只有在食物上面,舉凡交通、建築、衣服等都有。658Please respect copyright.PENANA9xvdfC996N
658Please respect copyright.PENANAy7eo3SXNuE
搞得侏儒人心惶惶,不管做甚麼都怕遇到劣質商品。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVuwYyk21ul
658Please respect copyright.PENANA8POcinjRXD
可能有人有疑問,那些地精跟哥布林們就不怕嗎?658Please respect copyright.PENANA0Sl1kZpNj3
658Please respect copyright.PENANArinvgth4ig
當然不怕,只要看到那些黃澄澄的金幣,他們開心都來不及了,還怕甚麼?658Please respect copyright.PENANAYtqe1zBlUE
658Please respect copyright.PENANATtQvKevR83
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAYIIkNItcDJ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAooFEqXmsVk
地精可以說是最沒有同理心的種族,它們很少用同理心去跟思考事情。658Please respect copyright.PENANAtQ66ChnacK
658Please respect copyright.PENANA9I39Y9ehdx
如果有一件事對它們自己有利卻對其他人有害,它們就算知道了也會毫不猶豫地去做。658Please respect copyright.PENANAHMcdJb09Uq
658Please respect copyright.PENANAvKpsbv0pYo
沒有比地精還要自私的種族了,哥布林除外。658Please respect copyright.PENANAcXEwpmteSb
658Please respect copyright.PENANAuDiYXCLLx4
跟地精打交道是很浪費時間的一件事,其一是它們很狡猾,其二是它們無法理解他人的困難。658Please respect copyright.PENANAELNFn8xwwu
658Please respect copyright.PENANAgt4qvPWiIQ
這點就連地精工程師自己都覺得很煩,是的,再強調一次,連它們自己都覺得很煩。658Please respect copyright.PENANAsWJvXvc0SP
658Please respect copyright.PENANA3tdd4mmqMt
地精商人在要求工程施行時最喜歡說的一句話就是:658Please respect copyright.PENANAw1vI30hlJT
658Please respect copyright.PENANATIPT2d7Yc1
「我不管,你們一定要在時限內完成,無法完成是你們自己的問題。」658Please respect copyright.PENANAUkuquRorDB
658Please respect copyright.PENANA7SYA937OoV
同樣的意思放在不同人嘴裡會有不同的表現:658Please respect copyright.PENANA3FO1D0gand
658Please respect copyright.PENANA1WHipBvogE
「考不好是你努力不夠,是你自己的問題。」658Please respect copyright.PENANA2vAVlxR2zm
658Please respect copyright.PENANAgEqdWfT4F7
「薪水低是你不夠努力,是你自己的問題。」658Please respect copyright.PENANAZTFl9h32rq
658Please respect copyright.PENANABZFew8ygQg
「無法使用魔法是你不夠努力,是你自己的問題。」658Please respect copyright.PENANAlD7yQNgeVB
658Please respect copyright.PENANAGOUzEnkepP
附帶一提,地精的魔法天賦簡直是負的,它們的種族從未誕生過一個魔法師。但他們總會選擇性迴避這個問題,假裝魔法師這個職業並不存在。658Please respect copyright.PENANAhoYnZsNdWD
658Please respect copyright.PENANAHPVp8rzrqd
過去,地精的老大哥哥布林們曾經大肆獵殺國內的魔法師跟巫師。很顯然地對這對難兄難弟來說,解決問題的關鍵永遠都在他人身上,而不是自己身上。658Please respect copyright.PENANA249UbYeYDg
658Please respect copyright.PENANAOEQ6a3NSI2
※658Please respect copyright.PENANALIuduSk3AQ
658Please respect copyright.PENANARFwAubi7TS
大多數的地精都有點小聰明,該佔便宜的時候毫不留情。658Please respect copyright.PENANA5uznjqXwTg
658Please respect copyright.PENANAUP6gqWyACO
但這些地精被騙的機率也大到不可思議。658Please respect copyright.PENANAeovMpbkn0S
658Please respect copyright.PENANAitxPZH2buL
那些受騙的地精總是有一堆藉口可以說服自己被騙,比方說:658Please respect copyright.PENANAs6tu0j6wWh
658Please respect copyright.PENANACYQ333jkK4
「我那麼聰明,一定不會被騙。」658Please respect copyright.PENANAacBvo2zEM5
658Please respect copyright.PENANAKzpfSwCxvp
「人家跟我是親友,不會那麼過分。」658Please respect copyright.PENANAPCMgMggnGJ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAeQWYX4tEjZ
「是我運氣太好,抽到大獎正常。」658Please respect copyright.PENANA7vr1FTXtPI
658Please respect copyright.PENANA1Z0Iax5eA6
「不可能那麼倒楣就被我遇上。」658Please respect copyright.PENANACEX0tZ4Au3
658Please respect copyright.PENANAOxOcAE3OWK
很遺憾地,不幸遇上詐欺事件後,財物損失的機率幾乎是百分之百。658Please respect copyright.PENANAMADPDj6TgG
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqBrqcXcPKd
常常就有地精傻傻地在魔法師銀行裡面利用魔法傳送了一些金幣給騙徒後,才在事後發現被騙而捶胸頓足懊悔不已。658Please respect copyright.PENANAXNAKvBgklF
658Please respect copyright.PENANAp3y7Y78IBj
更好笑的是,大多數的地精都是被自己人給騙了。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2PIiBQvNv1
658Please respect copyright.PENANArM0HdjZmRd
是的,只有地精懂得怎麼騙地精,地精是世界上最狡詐的種族,也是最愚蠢的種族。658Please respect copyright.PENANAeWy2btbFJa
658Please respect copyright.PENANAj5WdP0uu4i
這個世界各種高級詐欺都是在地精手上發揚光大的。658Please respect copyright.PENANA0TWyTLFX5c
658Please respect copyright.PENANAnbKac83NAj
最有名的就是「飛馬彩券詐欺」案件。658Please respect copyright.PENANA6cmVNHrX4D
658Please respect copyright.PENANACowJR4EwTY
飛馬彩券是由飛馬通運公司發行,這間公司的老闆為了吸引客人使用他們的貨運服務,想到了利用彩券的點子。658Please respect copyright.PENANAZB8FS0JmuN
658Please respect copyright.PENANAdxvF4JZych
只要使用郵件服務就會在收件者的信件裡夾一張飛馬彩券,只要刮開彩券的魔法塗層就會看到一組符文,符文記載的內容就是彩券的獎品。658Please respect copyright.PENANAwcCV03JIyT
658Please respect copyright.PENANA67WQ21U3yK
透過這樣的方式,公司的業績也扶搖直上。但不久後就被一些有心的地精偽造各種山寨的彩券,夾雜在飛馬公司負責的郵件裡面。658Please respect copyright.PENANA6hzjA62gmQ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAlCIVU2DJ6R
這彩券的中獎率自然是百分之百,金額也高得嚇人。所以收到彩券的地精在刮開彩券的當下通常會興奮地找不著北,然後順著彩券上記載的魔法通訊號碼,拿起魔法傳聲機撥號過來。658Please respect copyright.PENANAGOdVZHCqqj
658Please respect copyright.PENANApOfGiQdxvn
當然這獎品是注定拿不到的,但詐騙集團的地精會巧立各種名目,說為了政府法規或者運費等等,要求對方先匯出一筆不小的金額。658Please respect copyright.PENANArH2pDErSTG
658Please respect copyright.PENANAedtngSuqvX
然後就沒有然後了,獎品不可能給人,錢也拿不回來了。只有被騙的地精整天望眼欲穿地等著,直到他發現自己受騙為止。658Please respect copyright.PENANAOhwZxhpkPJ
658Please respect copyright.PENANACJF7dnekBv
聽說受害者高達萬人,總詐騙金額少說一千萬枚金幣。而遭受池魚之殃的飛馬通運公司在此之後信用破產,營運不擅而倒閉了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAzNYiCHzh9s
658Please respect copyright.PENANA7HZ7uvEirs
但是類似類型的彩券詐欺依然沒有消蝕,反而以各種不同形式混入了其他貨運公司的信件中,直到現在依然有腦筋不太好的老地精會被假的彩券獎品誘惑,最後騙光身上所有的退休金老本。658Please respect copyright.PENANAPDKrExkJ7Y
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqRfmL6xpKD
而那些詐欺犯地精呢?呵呵,就算真的被警察給抓了,也不過關個幾年就能出獄。如果關幾年就能騙到幾百萬金幣,那還真的沒甚麼地精會怕。 658Please respect copyright.PENANAvUAR7qGSjQ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAepToXDf5GS
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAEnp6Pnkrev
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說到這裡,就不得不批評一下地精的賭性堅強。658Please respect copyright.PENANAjf5TEWfqou
658Please respect copyright.PENANA28Da91VLRi
地精非常愛賭博,他們對賭博的怨念遠大於其他種族。658Please respect copyright.PENANAsaRYbN5AzP
658Please respect copyright.PENANAoIVBp3YhSZ
對於西方的精靈來說賭博是一種娛樂,但是對地精來說,賭博就是一種賺錢投資。658Please respect copyright.PENANAspWigYDKsk
658Please respect copyright.PENANA9p2FqWK09X
可能有人會認為投資一樣有風險,跟賭博差不多吧?658Please respect copyright.PENANA1TwWoSJTLx
658Please respect copyright.PENANAh0PUlvpBmI
是的,看起來的確是差不多沒錯。所以對地精來說,這兩樣東西就是同一樣東西了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAEayRVIyN8r
658Please respect copyright.PENANAGNgx5ZNfkV
只有侏儒知道賭博跟投資的差別在哪裡,差異最多就是那個時間。658Please respect copyright.PENANAj2oh0VhOL3
658Please respect copyright.PENANAnTkORIgsw5
賭博的勝負都是即時的居多,你下注,然後賭贏了就贏得報酬。投資不是,投資是你將錢才投入某項資產中,然後隨著時間演變,資產升值,你的投資才能得到報酬。658Please respect copyright.PENANA7527py4bEG
658Please respect copyright.PENANA9N4ro8TXen
地精才不想搞懂這些複雜的東西,大多數的地精都很急性子。658Please respect copyright.PENANAuVrbEp9ZKC
658Please respect copyright.PENANAP3KVxxFJGu
他們沒有耐心知道投資利基在哪,風險多高,又要花多少時間才能回收成本。658Please respect copyright.PENANAjYrjA2XrLD
658Please respect copyright.PENANAUHH9jnyPCL
寧願去賭機率,賭運氣,錢甩出去就要馬上看到獲利。658Please respect copyright.PENANAPSzPfqRgAV
658Please respect copyright.PENANAvepE62KXHC
地精們早就賭習慣了,為了滿足他們的賭癮,島上的政府還聯合幾家魔法師銀行開創了一種叫做「樂透」的魔法機器。658Please respect copyright.PENANAquwR9sT7Fq
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqsSc8DP6Vx
每隔二四六機器就會吐出一長串的數字,只要有地精用這組數字買樂透券,他就可以贏得所有買樂透券賭金的二分之一。658Please respect copyright.PENANAA1IGeVKHEj
658Please respect copyright.PENANAn0kQjposlE
欸?你說剩下的二分之一賭金去哪了?當然是進政府跟銀行口袋了啊,不然怎麼會只有二分之一?658Please respect copyright.PENANADuVWOFOLGz
658Please respect copyright.PENANAQe4sDOxlOg
當然,為了照顧社會大眾的觀感,主辦的政府跟銀行都說「我們會拿出彩金的一部份來照顧弱勢族群」,至於拿多少那就不知道了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVwgehsSn2v
658Please respect copyright.PENANAKXY6GXsiDr
如果你以為這個「樂透魔法」是獨創的,那你又錯了,幾十年前,就有地精們想出一種叫做「六喝蔡」的魔法機器,運作模式跟簽賭方式幾乎跟「樂透」一模一樣。差別在於一個是政府跟銀行帶頭,一個是私人帶頭。658Please respect copyright.PENANARsass0ptVT
658Please respect copyright.PENANAgZFe3Xbzi7
後來因為「六喝蔡」的魔法機器太容易被邪惡的法師入侵操縱,加上私有的簽賭組織收完錢後,常有地精會捲款潛逃,結果玩得人就越來越少了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAB9g2x0McTc
658Please respect copyright.PENANAmWEpqHIZ1c
除了「六喝蔡」、「樂透」以外,地精們還有「運動彩券」、「傌蔣」、「波青割」等多采多姿的賭博方式。658Please respect copyright.PENANAjDc4hICQoR
658Please respect copyright.PENANANlr3RJNiPA
要談賭博,還真的沒有哪個種族比地精還要感興趣的。不過奇怪的是,地精們非常不喜歡賭場。658Please respect copyright.PENANADtmdJAES2B
658Please respect copyright.PENANAKRnQcbdA3X
島上的政府是有提案建設賭場過,可是因為地精們奇怪的道德觀,竟然就被否決了。658Please respect copyright.PENANACsjaIICzrA
658Please respect copyright.PENANAfQC4J1YTeP
一個如此愛好賭博的種族卻會排斥賭場,這對島上的侏儒們來說始終是一個難解的謎。658Please respect copyright.PENANACV6t7FYD95
658Please respect copyright.PENANAFZpn4c5gLS
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAM9ZW3VVD7Z
658Please respect copyright.PENANA16yKPh5tAz
其實地精還是會做投資的,它們最喜歡的投資叫做「方地鏟」658Please respect copyright.PENANA0TmIZLHvfe
658Please respect copyright.PENANAWlomnNgVmM
這個「方地鏟」說穿了,就是用一種叫做「地鏟」的魔法道具把一塊土地劃為己有,然後標上一個價值後等人來收購。因為這種魔法道具大多是方形的,所以就被稱為「方地鏟」。658Please respect copyright.PENANA6OVsQL56Wn
658Please respect copyright.PENANAaQhwTkdYch
被「方地鏟」的土地除非得到那塊魔法道具,不然是無法在土地上進行任何行為。658Please respect copyright.PENANAsZUwegvqIN
658Please respect copyright.PENANAIlDow5C2Cr
身為地精這個種族,既然有個地字,自然是很重視土地的。地精們認為土地是有價值的,所以買賣土地也是一種投資行為。658Please respect copyright.PENANAgoHtQYR4uO
658Please respect copyright.PENANANRzqm2GEvW
當然,我們不能說這樣做很荒謬,畢竟價值是看人決定的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAQTYxdK20UZ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAC3vE23t2UA
但是地精們把「方地鏟」投資玩到一個簡直可以說是走火入魔的程度,那就讓人感到很無言了。658Please respect copyright.PENANA0vmQTN0ET9
658Please respect copyright.PENANAcn95MZIqPh
這座島的土地畢竟是不多,但好歹也是能讓所有地精跟侏儒可以生活。658Please respect copyright.PENANAMobLzxSB1T
658Please respect copyright.PENANAYK9H5sbtyB
不可思議的是,這座島大部分的土地都被標上了價格,而且很多都是連地精自己多數人都買不起的價格。658Please respect copyright.PENANAmb3i19UeAO
658Please respect copyright.PENANArvHVVqoNjv
是的,即使空間足夠,但這座島依然有許多地精與侏儒過著居無定所的苦日子。658Please respect copyright.PENANAR5nTNWnb4u
658Please respect copyright.PENANANmwgGRUdZ5
這都是地精們瘋狂地投資「方地鏟」所帶來的禍患。658Please respect copyright.PENANAhrAroT8pho
658Please respect copyright.PENANA6V6jdWmHaa
地精們發現一件事,只要今天用錢買下一塊「方地鏟」,過沒多久這塊「方地鏟」的價格就會上升,到時候再賣掉就可以獲得一筆不小的利潤。658Please respect copyright.PENANARKEIeM3fWj
658Please respect copyright.PENANAnMJYQYi2XF
那些地精們都很聰明,它們覺得沒有「方地鏟」的人鐵定是需要買「方地鏟」才有地方住的,所以它們只要有錢就會想盡辦法買「方地鏟」來投資,等待獲利。658Please respect copyright.PENANACAxjmIJEGL
658Please respect copyright.PENANAavgzWZj2pX
甚至有更聰明的地精認為既然我賣了就有錢賺,那我為什麼不借錢來買呢?只要把土地賣了馬上就能還錢了,根本不用擔心會賠錢啊。658Please respect copyright.PENANAnrWjzGHVCQ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAKkL1S3xHkA
於是乎越來越多地精投入了「方地鏟」的投資行列中,為了賺更多錢,他們還會用越來越高的價格來買「方地鏟」,這種行為又被稱作「超方地鏟」。658Please respect copyright.PENANAwSUNVzzYb6
658Please respect copyright.PENANANTCB0spIwl
地精們做事都是不考慮後果的,很快地島上所有非政府管理的土地都被「方地鏟」了。而「方地鏟」的價格也跟著水漲船高,高到多數人都買不起的程度。658Please respect copyright.PENANAP13Jzek2ha
658Please respect copyright.PENANAbAQV4RaMTT
這些地精們還不知足,連政府管理的土地都想透過非法手段來「方地鏟」呢!658Please respect copyright.PENANA0kwPBpjXWw
658Please respect copyright.PENANAr3x9iZlA03
甚至為了避免「方地鏟」貶值,它們不惜賄賂多嘴的妖精們,到處散布「方地鏟」是很熱門的好投資,連哥布林跟精靈們都喜歡買個島上的「方地鏟」來保值。658Please respect copyright.PENANAApIihHXkG6
658Please respect copyright.PENANA43MLXAQgRE
事實上,跟地精同族的歌布林也很喜歡投資方地鏟沒錯,哥布林商人跟地精商人一樣都很愛投資低風險的資產,而不會損耗,有認主不會被偷走的「方地鏟」就成了他們最愛的商品。658Please respect copyright.PENANA6QycJIF6Hf
658Please respect copyright.PENANAFID7QvX5wI
但地精們不知道的是,哥布林其實也是拿島上政府的借來的金幣在投資「方地鏟」的。比如說那個號稱島上最高的「異靈異大樓」就是由某位假裝自己是歸島地精的哥布林商人,跟島上政府借錢加上以投資股票的名義跟地精收來的金幣買下。658Please respect copyright.PENANApjkZMLkdNN
658Please respect copyright.PENANACx4gKAFMg1
如果你覺得到此為止還是正常的投資行為的話請往下看,你會發現地精們為了「超方地鏟」簡直無所不用其極。658Please respect copyright.PENANAkuNq24psWo
658Please respect copyright.PENANAyRVWubBhVK
比方說要政府在整個島上蓋滿魔法列車軌道,即使魔法列車軌道本身營運會虧損也要每隔幾公里就設一站。因為只要有車站加持「方地鏟」的價格就會暴漲。658Please respect copyright.PENANAI4GNsK39Qv
658Please respect copyright.PENANAq1U9P9GrRr
不准政府蓋孤兒院、養老院、精神病院,因為這些會害「方地鏟」的價格暴跌。658Please respect copyright.PENANA7VDcDWS3i1
658Please respect copyright.PENANA6KLxX1Lyb4
不准政府蓋社會住宅,因為社會住宅可能引來罪犯跟窮人,會害「方地鏟」暴跌。658Please respect copyright.PENANATDGrPFMg7D
658Please respect copyright.PENANAcnXkPYY668
拿錢給妖精們,要他們散播「現在進場投資方地鏟馬上就能大賺特賺」的謠言,試圖製造「方地鏟」還很多人想要買的假象。658Please respect copyright.PENANARJZ7eHuppA
658Please respect copyright.PENANAfRnph45LfW
要求政府開放哥布林拿劣質的偽造金幣來買「方地鏟」,然後無視哥布林賣掉土地後拿到的都是優質金幣這件事。658Please respect copyright.PENANA02iMCHMQKZ
658Please respect copyright.PENANAm6EX4icE4D
總之,那些地精們為了自己手上那個可笑的魔法道具,簡直是把整座島弄得天怒人怨。658Please respect copyright.PENANA4ylvsH69wE
658Please respect copyright.PENANAJjew94KMcz
而這個投資的未來展望也越來越糟了,「方地鏟」的價值是決定於需求,而現在的價格已經高到沒有人買得起的程度。658Please respect copyright.PENANAhzbjDHR2u0
658Please respect copyright.PENANACx4urAzI2T
如果哪天「方地鏟」真的崩盤了,想必會有許多地精從「異靈異大樓」跳下也說不定。658Please respect copyright.PENANANCiCjjQteL
658Please respect copyright.PENANAoGnASg9AFM
※658Please respect copyright.PENANATxwuNCNFVw
658Please respect copyright.PENANAwFyHlaCo0j
從「喜歡立即看到收益」跟「喜歡買毫無意義的方地鏟囤積獲利」兩點來看,我們可以發現地精的矛盾性格。658Please respect copyright.PENANAJzMVa7pKui
658Please respect copyright.PENANAfezAOJCI6A
賺得越快的錢風險越大,但是方地鏟這種東西風險卻極小。兩者理論上是相衝突的,但是很多地精都希望能同時達到兩者。658Please respect copyright.PENANAUboyyBkZtD
658Please respect copyright.PENANA7zpcvRxIFg
我們侏儒用左腳的小腳趾想都知道這不可能,但地精們卻認為這樣才叫在賺錢。658Please respect copyright.PENANARhKcTW0Zvk
658Please respect copyright.PENANAwoCbv9uIEP
而且越有錢的地精越是深信如此,這實在是很讓人感到無言。658Please respect copyright.PENANA5TOFclez23
658Please respect copyright.PENANAnTNCKFobgD
不只如此,地精的矛盾性格在很多方面都存在。658Please respect copyright.PENANAMN8uDRgGri
658Please respect copyright.PENANACYixX6lPig
地精們覺得物美價廉的商品才是好商品,卻不知道商品的品質與它的價格本來就該呈正比。658Please respect copyright.PENANA3L6MeJLOsU
658Please respect copyright.PENANA1eHQOPIuCJ
地精們認為政府不應該做太多管制,卻又在自己不守法而受難遭災時拜託政府給予國賠。658Please respect copyright.PENANAKXAeLCnYhV
658Please respect copyright.PENANALER6Sokecr
地精們不想花大錢看醫生,卻肯出高價購買魔法地下電台廣告的違法藥物。658Please respect copyright.PENANABrKSD0z30X
658Please respect copyright.PENANAsf8I7MdlQ5
地精們要求所有人都能對自己誠實,卻又老愛欺騙他人。658Please respect copyright.PENANAXHxKASNX2t
658Please respect copyright.PENANAC526jCsNVn
有一個現象可以很恰當地描述這種混亂的矛盾:658Please respect copyright.PENANApEPtoJRKyg
658Please respect copyright.PENANA6S2U0KHLqc
地精們在假日的時候非常喜歡去島上的一些自然景觀遊山玩水。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVLp2kzds10
658Please respect copyright.PENANAoZAeHBAkv7
這是好事,不只地精,妖精跟精靈,哥布林跟侏儒也會在假日的時候出去親近自然環境。658Please respect copyright.PENANAydPl5Thd16
658Please respect copyright.PENANAehFlsLRihs
但地精跟哥布林到了所謂的「自然景觀」,常常就會把手上的垃圾丟在當地,或者隨意破壞盜取各種自然造物。658Please respect copyright.PENANAxDfsc9HvuW
658Please respect copyright.PENANAsxHFaF0j0h
那邊那個,就是在說你,不要拿十字鎬敲女王石的脖子好嗎?658Please respect copyright.PENANAmupo5BxIuo
658Please respect copyright.PENANA8zchLDvySr
還有那邊那兩位,拜託別在神木上刻甚麼「阿明&小美一生一世」的字,這棵樹是你家種的?658Please respect copyright.PENANANYSA896xja
658Please respect copyright.PENANAFxQbM180PI
會喜歡去那種地方,當然是對眼前的景色賞心悅目。但你一邊欣賞一邊把手上的垃圾丟地上造成汙染髒亂,甚至手賤到要把自己正在欣賞的東西給弄壞,這到底是有甚麼毛病?658Please respect copyright.PENANA0W9nCEZmEu
658Please respect copyright.PENANApJCfNh0nNc
沒有人會喜歡去一個滿是垃圾的地方,連地精都是如此。但也只有地精跟哥布林會一邊欣賞一邊破壞這些景觀,且完全不覺得自己這樣做有甚麼問題。658Please respect copyright.PENANATjBOEGq7Vo
658Please respect copyright.PENANApZ99PjqjGy
真是讓人感到匪夷所思。658Please respect copyright.PENANAhvdZNxiMZB
658Please respect copyright.PENANAFoQXJnqY2z
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAHjHU8JeMw7
658Please respect copyright.PENANAXxD1xX2qfK
這種矛盾也體現在地精的國際觀上。658Please respect copyright.PENANAjRL1m0bHpS
658Please respect copyright.PENANAAaMDm1u3L5
其實地精身為哥布林的附屬,又接受了各種外來文化的衝擊,對於自身有著很強烈的自卑感。658Please respect copyright.PENANAoXIPd6Zlol
658Please respect copyright.PENANAPUMDXoGqPv
這點侏儒就沒甚麼感覺了,對侏儒來說他們可是能與精靈相提並論的古老種族,或許沒有精靈那種強烈的種族優越感,但是看的東西多了,也沒很在意要跟誰比跟誰比。658Please respect copyright.PENANAuzFR9Ob7Qs
658Please respect copyright.PENANAh9t7bE9Gur
哥布林對精靈一族一直有很強烈的敵視感,這其實也是一種自卑心理的防衛表象。而地精不只對哥布林,對精靈也有很矛盾的崇拜心態。658Please respect copyright.PENANABRu1rjCBmz
658Please respect copyright.PENANAlucFVu1Gkj
在崇尚精靈帶來的高度魔法文明前,心裡卻也對自己被文化入侵這件事感到憤慨。658Please respect copyright.PENANAU95Yx1Rcop
658Please respect copyright.PENANAMp72DZrXz0
崇拜哥布林近年崛起的優勢,卻又覺得歌布林文化與精靈相比既粗俗又不堪入目。658Please respect copyright.PENANAbDxTCSCXxj
658Please respect copyright.PENANA7sfmxVhCZl
在大部分的地精眼裡只有哥布林跟精靈兩個種族,頂多再加上北方的蛇人族而已,他們大多無視位在東南大洋的南諸島海族,極北方的機械人文明,認為這世界就是由精靈跟哥布林在推動的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAubrBEaf9LD
658Please respect copyright.PENANAmrGNqGSZPZ
原因無他,太遠了,而且語言隔閡很嚴重。658Please respect copyright.PENANAtGE9Z0g85C
658Please respect copyright.PENANAAG7hH3fXQS
有些地精連精靈內部其實還有分成幾個大部落這件事也不清楚,對他們來說那些高大的長耳族全是精靈沒錯,至於是歐羅巴系統還是雅美麗加系統,他們也分不清楚。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2KjqZJpjK3
658Please respect copyright.PENANAhwtvT2uGsX
更不用說相關的地理位置、歷史淵源、習俗文化等,對地精來說他們一向在意的只有錢而已,就是這樣還想談國際觀。658Please respect copyright.PENANA5hPaxYN5gy
658Please respect copyright.PENANAoXqvrFoDzv
那還真是讓人笑掉大牙就是。658Please respect copyright.PENANAoA7NYYIRij
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqUBCHbRYvd
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAAM4bYypNEN
658Please respect copyright.PENANAASY3AdZc9V
說到這兒,就不得不提一個非常荒謬的現象,叫做「侯斯島之光」。658Please respect copyright.PENANAcSr9wr1hhn
658Please respect copyright.PENANAGXkwkoIgqL
侯斯島就是這座島的名字,這座島除了地精跟侏儒以外,還住了半身人跟妖精。不過這兩個種族我們之後再談,先來聊聊這個侯斯島之光是怎麼回事。658Please respect copyright.PENANACBNSO8EUrr
658Please respect copyright.PENANAl3PvfAOUSu
地精們剛到侯斯島的時候,這裡就是一個無名小島,全世界能知道這座島的人寥寥可數。658Please respect copyright.PENANArN0mpXPd7W
658Please respect copyright.PENANA3KhcADi1OW
前面說過,地精是非常有自卑感的種族,它們亟需要有個證明來宣揚自己的存在。658Please respect copyright.PENANAhiQGHTGjqY
658Please respect copyright.PENANADkiLP14kp2
於是就在種族情結、政治正確、各種天時地利的考量下,「侯斯島之光」這個稱號就誕生了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAlFY5uNzSwA
658Please respect copyright.PENANAYnfMEkDeCE
這個稱號的存在就是為了表揚所有在國外取得成就的地精或侏儒,只要你在島上出生,不管是否在島上生活,在日後於國際間拿到莫大成就,就會被地精們冠上這個稱號。658Please respect copyright.PENANAflRjsE9AyL
658Please respect copyright.PENANAUFzWxcN8Or
當然,這個成就必然是要跟錢有關的,如果你的成就看起來不值錢,地精們還不屑給你。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2mzfNVN5DB
658Please respect copyright.PENANACYVfx63LtV
但如果地精們給你了,你不想要還不行。658Please respect copyright.PENANAHX7EumRkNE
658Please respect copyright.PENANAsA6HQw1W6d
當然你要是以為地精們很喜歡侯斯島之光那你就錯了,地精們喜歡的是侯斯島之光帶給它們的優越感,他們並不是在喜歡侯斯島之光。658Please respect copyright.PENANAoSskcKwmnp
658Please respect copyright.PENANAEiTHkPLnRv
好像只要把侯斯島之光掛在嘴邊,自己就能變得跟侯斯島之光一樣偉大了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAi5HwxeeNtS
658Please respect copyright.PENANAUQxrDud3bg
但其實那只是一種錯覺,個人的偉大並無法轉換成族群的偉大,而族群的偉大更不可能轉換成個人的偉大。658Please respect copyright.PENANAd1inPCSsnc
658Please respect copyright.PENANAMC612fVFKd
這個侏儒們都懂,地精們卻不懂,這又得再提到地精的差不多哲學了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAZsFy2jetwg
658Please respect copyright.PENANAIIJR8CMhHn
你是地精,我也是地精,我們都差不多,所以我就是你。既然你是侯斯島之光,那我也是侯斯島之光,你偉大當然我也偉大。658Please respect copyright.PENANAi5jnV76Urp
658Please respect copyright.PENANAjSagCIcqgn
好吧,老實說這跟哥布林最愛用的口號「大家都是哥布林」有異曲同工之妙就是。658Please respect copyright.PENANAiheKPTHwVO
658Please respect copyright.PENANA0FbSxzWxmS
說真的,很多侯斯島之光也不喜歡地精。尤其是被錯當成地精的侏儒們,通常就是在島上不受其他地精待見才逃到島外發展。現在好不容易成功了,卻又被這些往日瞧不起他們的地精給拿來利用。658Please respect copyright.PENANA440jpfRMhO
658Please respect copyright.PENANA36wcj7s2VH
你說,這怎麼能讓人高興得起來呢?658Please respect copyright.PENANAnn2lijIzED
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※658Please respect copyright.PENANAlmeDsMgsrr
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在退個幾步來說,如果「侯斯島之光」真的能讓這座島揚名國際,其實也是好事一樁。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2Hfozqn2wz
658Please respect copyright.PENANApQGhoXEGuW
很遺憾地,完全沒有這麼一回事。658Please respect copyright.PENANABwflwwcJ9b
658Please respect copyright.PENANA4keqprtszD
大多數外島人並沒有因為知道這些「侯斯島之光」的事蹟,而願意認真去了解這座島上的生態。658Please respect copyright.PENANAkUIOVYT4ef
658Please respect copyright.PENANAPKY76HW8MR
這是理所當然的,就說了個人的偉大不代表族群的偉大了,在精靈們眼裡他們會尊敬一個地精或侏儒絕對不是因為他來自侯斯島。而是因為這個地精或侏儒做的事情值得他們尊敬,所以他們才願意關注對方。658Please respect copyright.PENANAnVWuWFfOnX
658Please respect copyright.PENANAkLQ2EoKc4e
嘛…以一個侏儒冷淡的眼光來看,精靈這整個族群從上到下不管是哪個部落的,都是一副屌個二五八萬天上天下唯我獨尊的打不斷鼻子高傲感。658Please respect copyright.PENANAUawrM7H17G
658Please respect copyright.PENANA1WgtoPRqQK
有句俗語叫做:「想打斷精靈的鼻子比殺了他們還難」,意思就是想要傷害精靈的自尊心是很困難的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAZp5Yc43ZWq
658Please respect copyright.PENANAB3LpTTlQMQ
這種自我感覺良好出現在少部分慣用右手的精靈身上是很明顯的,也因為這樣,沒自信的地精在精靈面前總是抬不起頭。658Please respect copyright.PENANAzc78E7ZwGI
658Please respect copyright.PENANAhkYI2rc8Dp
尤其在島上精靈是很稀有的存在,物以稀為貴的結果,精靈就變得很尊貴了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAjmRnc2RfRo
658Please respect copyright.PENANA3mmhYXBcWc
其實精靈的文化對亞細亞大陸的影響很強勢,以歌布林為中心擴張的各類亞種更是難以抵擋。這幾年也是有侏儒或者腦袋進化錯方向的地精提出「回歸本土」的主張,希望藉由提倡島上的歷史與文化,來消除精靈文化對島上的影響。658Please respect copyright.PENANAUoqFL0Zyzn
658Please respect copyright.PENANAV3Y21ge9HB
說是這麼說,但那裏還擺著一個「哥布林文化」呢!要「回歸本土」,在某些地精耳中聽起來就像是要「去哥布林化」,這一聽可不能隨便答應了。658Please respect copyright.PENANA6w1JW3jw8Y
658Please respect copyright.PENANAeryxgl7zjM
地精的確很不在意他人感受,短視又近利。但它們自認有一個優點,就是不忘本。大多數地精都是從哥布林帝國移植過來的,對它們來說哥布林帝國才是它們的祖國,你現在要「回歸本土」「去哥布林化」,這不是要它們的老命嗎?658Please respect copyright.PENANAIAYwVm10y1
658Please respect copyright.PENANAvIrC8Znm14
所以這個主張很快就被打壓下來了,沒辦法,地精們只好繼續過著被精靈文化侵蝕的苦日子。想要回歸本土,從島上的歷史開始認真探索,估計沒個半世紀等不到了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAEkGZO2Ew0Y
658Please respect copyright.PENANAo81l4d1YzE
你總得等老地精們都死光了才推得動不是?658Please respect copyright.PENANAFn1TzuM7bW
658Please respect copyright.PENANANDKx5BUldV
※658Please respect copyright.PENANAkRF20wJqhk
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說得等它們死光可不是玩笑話,地精們的階級觀念是非常死板且不容更動的。658Please respect copyright.PENANAQbNFQVQbPO
658Please respect copyright.PENANAB2IchL1N8W
越老的地精地位越崇高,不管你有理不有理,只要你夠老,大家就得讓你三分。658Please respect copyright.PENANAPkqq2grOQJ
658Please respect copyright.PENANA0eayebD93o
這種觀念是普遍存在於地精之中,當然這幾年島上因為不知名因素,各種族的生育率都降很快,所以年輕一代的有這觀念的地精也就稍微少了一點。658Please respect copyright.PENANAHfb4YOOI7w
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但至少在中壯年這世代的地精,還是很吃這套的。658Please respect copyright.PENANA6j7ThBnpUV
658Please respect copyright.PENANAr16dC9tKvJ
長輩壓晚輩,學長壓學弟,前輩壓後輩,老師壓學生。很多聽起來有問題的爭執,只要把這個階級關係套上去,你就會發現對他們來說這非常合理。658Please respect copyright.PENANAfzZlfgXhD4
658Please respect copyright.PENANAgHKmEAMVXB
因為我老,所以這件事我對。老子吃過的岩蟲比你吃過的江稞還多,你哪來的膽子跟老子爭這個?658Please respect copyright.PENANA427pLyUoTe
658Please respect copyright.PENANA798FhcGPkM
侏儒們都很詬病這種上下關係,在它們眼裡當你年紀大了身體機能大不如前,連腦中的智慧都比不上年輕人的時候,你憑甚麼能得到他人的尊敬?658Please respect copyright.PENANASGBPir9BNL
658Please respect copyright.PENANAlDTZjtLUua
就憑你活得比較久?那這樣下去誰還願意努力奮鬥?要知道年輕時越拼命的人通常越短命,這樣篩選下去,老了還能當榜樣的可是少之又少了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAIKiQ80gB07
658Please respect copyright.PENANACZAt952GWH
地精們可不這麼看,它們的上下觀念是承自於哥布林帝國的「努學」,這據說是一門非常深奧的學問,象徵著哥布林帝國五千年博大精深的思想結晶。658Please respect copyright.PENANAwE1i7J1kDy
658Please respect copyright.PENANAUVBVG8qCXS
(實際上哥布林帝國建國至今也未滿百年,到底是哪來的五千年侏儒們也很納悶。)658Please respect copyright.PENANAw6SbRNDfh3
658Please respect copyright.PENANASrrAQ37N5J
所以對地精來說,這可是真理,一個不尊敬老人的人,除了精靈以外基本上都會被地精瞧不起。658Please respect copyright.PENANAB6NKj21SfG
658Please respect copyright.PENANA0boWfCzTlp
其實對某些看清楚形式的地精來說,這都是為了老後的保障。地精老後的身體機能其實衰敗的很快,如果沒有這樣的機制保護他們,恐怕老了後就會被年輕的地精給拋棄,從此曝屍荒野了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAB8iCq1GjIx
658Please respect copyright.PENANAD9IAFF8zMM
別懷疑,地精是很勢利的種族,像這種死後還要浪費幾百枚金幣,而且一半以上還要被那些教會的混蛋給賺走,有些地精還真的雙手一攤就不想管了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAogHoBaWKke
658Please respect copyright.PENANANjanINDh1v
但好在地精們一直堅持著「努學」,還有另一門學問「嘯道」,才能讓這些年輕的地精傻傻地相信自己就該尊敬沒有能力的長輩們。658Please respect copyright.PENANAXkQWuktFjG
658Please respect copyright.PENANAbi91R068sS
當然等年輕地精長大以後,他們自然會明白自己已經成為既得利益者的候選人,當然更不可能會放棄這兩門學問了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAeu0CgwrMIT
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這就是地精們維護自己的社會結構穩定,減少動亂的好方法。658Please respect copyright.PENANAnRKTjQH3Cn
658Please respect copyright.PENANAOkpf7M6Js8
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從地精們重老輕少的價值觀,大致可以猜到地精的教育是怎麼一回事。658Please respect copyright.PENANAM2vPWHl0eN
658Please respect copyright.PENANAlyML8C1Huh
簡單來說,地精並沒有把自己的子女當成一個獨立的個體來看。在地精眼哩,年紀越小的人越是廢物,這跟年輕地精的實力無關,只跟它們的年齡有關。658Please respect copyright.PENANAmqq00akmr1
658Please respect copyright.PENANA3MShF9sCKQ
所以年幼的地精是沒有任何發言權可言的,有一句地精俗語很直觀地描述了這樣的情況:658Please respect copyright.PENANAdXeTLu7uV9
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「小地精有耳無嘴。」658Please respect copyright.PENANAdi1amlxMna
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當然這意思不是指年幼的地精真的沒有嘴巴,只是在比喻年紀小的人要多聽少說話,不要隨便頂撞父母。658Please respect copyright.PENANA2RYnxuXoKG
658Please respect copyright.PENANAGhEtglinhu
諷刺的是,年齡差距更大的精靈教育方式卻完全相反,他們把所有的年幼精靈都當成獨立的個體教育,希望他們能夠盡快脫離父母的照顧。658Please respect copyright.PENANAteD2tTVuvT
658Please respect copyright.PENANAjqJlnzMjDf
即使在與子女溝通時也會用對等的地位與對方交流,而非只靠權威與蠻力來壓制對方。658Please respect copyright.PENANAGY1EEp2m3c
658Please respect copyright.PENANAJJ9ukD2q7h
(至於因為精靈比較年長所以得到地精過多尊敬這種事就完全是題外話了)658Please respect copyright.PENANAcwdiMuE80o
658Please respect copyright.PENANAQXgybP1YtS
地精教育小孩的方式,最簡單也最多地精會的,就是打。658Please respect copyright.PENANAGeDDUBSrxT
658Please respect copyright.PENANAGJ3kC9f3Z5
沒錯,就連地精中小學的老師們都很喜歡這一套,對它們來說小孩是無法溝通的,這些小孩太笨了,除了用野獸的教育方式,沒有任何方法可以教導。658Please respect copyright.PENANAnDHyhxCxAe
658Please respect copyright.PENANAIzLM9rPsdc
過去就有許多地精父母不小心打死小孩的案件,因為太聰明而生育率不高的侏儒們看到這些地精小孩被自己的白痴父母給打死時,很多都感到心痛不捨。658Please respect copyright.PENANAyubFPq7LYE
658Please respect copyright.PENANAS5NR1MvhCN
身為地精的小孩是非常不幸的,基本上毫無自由可言。地精父母會以小孩太弱小了不該出門當藉口,嚴格限制年幼地精的外出。658Please respect copyright.PENANAjMNVNxPUBv
658Please respect copyright.PENANAdmqESkSoGU
甚至因為覺得自己空出時間心力來照顧子女是非常虧欠自己的事情,而認為小孩都是欠自己的,自己要小孩做甚麼小孩就該做甚麼。658Please respect copyright.PENANArDnjM5vcvb
658Please respect copyright.PENANABFNzDMTzUg
在經濟方面,地精父母很少會教導自家小孩怎麼花錢,通常不是定時給幾枚金幣當零用錢就是完全不給。658Please respect copyright.PENANA8suAsIvJqt
658Please respect copyright.PENANAA8BzzFfkJd
這幾年經濟大發展,有錢的地精父母甚至會每個月給自己小孩幾百枚甚至幾千枚金幣當零用錢,一枚金幣足以讓一個普通的地精審吃儉用過上十天,一個月給幾百枚,只會養成小孩奢侈的消費習慣。658Please respect copyright.PENANAuMWLe6RP6H
658Please respect copyright.PENANA1iGWdQ5fi6
又,因為疏於與孩子溝通。是的,地精眼中最重要的還是錢,小孩只是一個附屬品,證明自己人生過得很幸福的獎狀。658Please respect copyright.PENANAuOLtE7RO0P
658Please respect copyright.PENANAyYjB1GZQVe
實際上多數地精並不懂得如何疼愛自己的小孩,它們從未把自家小孩當作跟自己同樣地個體來交流。658Please respect copyright.PENANA9QEkJgRJha
658Please respect copyright.PENANAeHUWSD3XH8
在這種情況下,教導出來的年幼地精進入青春期大多會變得叛逆不然就變得麻木不仁。前者是將反抗父母當作證明自己是獨立自主個體的行為,後者則是已經完全被剝奪了情感表達。658Please respect copyright.PENANA18pqRi0Lsc
658Please respect copyright.PENANAPS2OaxMjmE
不過有趣的是,等到這些小地精長大後.他們又大多無法脫離自家父母的影子。658Please respect copyright.PENANA9u80VdUKxt
658Please respect copyright.PENANAQbZ35KjILW
只能說基因遺傳是強大的,即使他們再討厭自己的父母,長大後依然無法避免自己變得跟父母一樣,把自己的小孩當作東西來養。658Please respect copyright.PENANAOBPqpqjPlA
658Please respect copyright.PENANAWQiOlfh0im
真是有夠悲慘的無限循環啊。658Please respect copyright.PENANAEQH8Owbn9N
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658Please respect copyright.PENANA8WRkpG6spa
其實在過去醫療不發達,島上各地貧困到難以生存的年代,地精的價值觀真的解決了很多世代衝突帶來的不穩定。658Please respect copyright.PENANAzflfBexoCx
658Please respect copyright.PENANA7jagTin0JR
日子越難過,其實最有活力的年輕族群影響力是越強的。如果不推廣「努學」、「嘯道」,老地精的非自然死亡率非常高。658Please respect copyright.PENANA9C0jRytBR9
658Please respect copyright.PENANATUnJyFYEOo
尤其是戰後地精入島,很多老地精顛沛流離餐風露宿孤苦無依,沒有年輕地精的照顧大概只能客死異鄉。658Please respect copyright.PENANAcCCVum40mO
658Please respect copyright.PENANAm3EPKIrGgX
不過這樣的景況沒有持續多久,在戰後島上的政府接受精靈部落的資助漸漸發展起來,地精們的生活條件也越來越好。658Please respect copyright.PENANAmUa93tsADT
658Please respect copyright.PENANAj0lPkxBT0P
戰後嬰兒潮帶來的人口紅利以及開發中帶來的經濟成長,讓這個戰後世代的地精們得到相當強大的經濟實力。658Please respect copyright.PENANACobVV19PPO
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這樣的實力是無法忽視的,再加上「努學」跟「嘯道」的加成,這個世代的地精非常強勢。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVjic5zlV9Z
658Please respect copyright.PENANA3eUGxcW3rR
他們認為島上的繁榮是自己靠實力帶來的,沒有自己的努力,這座島上的地精現在還在吃草呢!有這樣的認知,這些地精都非常高傲,而且固執。658Please respect copyright.PENANAaqP6rPfqDK
658Please respect copyright.PENANA9Bl6miiUp8
有的地精甚至認為自己已經能與精靈相提並論,沒辦法呢,接觸的精靈多了就會覺得地精跟精靈也差不到哪,那它們當然會覺得自己也能當精靈囉。658Please respect copyright.PENANAN1wioiDrg1
658Please respect copyright.PENANASEuLz11Zi1
近幾年人口紅利衰退,島上的經濟奇蹟不在。但這些戰後世代的地精依然把持住島上諸多資源,享受著優渥的生活。658Please respect copyright.PENANAa8rZG6Jrvh
658Please respect copyright.PENANAaDs4dTyM6h
它們對往日榮光不在感到心痛,左批這世代的年經地精沒出息,右批這世代的年精地精太會花錢。658Please respect copyright.PENANAFefxRQP5CN
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqK6LeXbvLF
總之,它們認為現在的衰退是年輕地精不爭氣帶來的。而身為老前輩的它們,該拖著年老弱智的身體帶領地精繼續走下去,才不會辜負了他們帶給地精一族的榮耀。658Please respect copyright.PENANAEu2S4WYw3i
658Please respect copyright.PENANA8EDJbxSQRA
而那些年輕的地精,自小就被這些強勢的戰後世代地精當成物品看待與教育,其實是很難生起反抗心的。不得不說這就是教育的獲勝,地精的教育真的不能等。658Please respect copyright.PENANAXkXe6PqLKP
658Please respect copyright.PENANAsU7jO0etO5
只有極少數的侏儒不吃這一套,他們早就明白整個經濟的衰退是怎麼一回事。當人口紅利不在,國家發展物價上升,自然競爭力就不在,這有甚麼好推給年輕人的?658Please respect copyright.PENANAQ6aShN0qbT
658Please respect copyright.PENANAdnXaw7ySye
更何況很多戰後世代地精都明白這點,不然何必要把自己的地精工廠轉移到東南亞細亞跟南方諸島?甚至那些人還拼命要求政府開放大量外籍的勞動力,希望減輕自家的負擔呢。658Please respect copyright.PENANAVXI5yeKsxh
658Please respect copyright.PENANAgwJCaizP8w
即使是如此,這些老地精們依然會在年輕人面前這麼說:658Please respect copyright.PENANAuroUMNHktL
658Please respect copyright.PENANAQZZy9iGkzb
「你們都是草莓地精!既軟又嫩!講沒幾句就臉紅不然就要爆炸!哪像我們以前巴拉不拉布阿巴啦…」658Please respect copyright.PENANAeAfb2ODSko
658Please respect copyright.PENANAAbJXKXjkc9
說完後滿足了自己的虛榮感,這些戰後世代的老地精們轉身就去過著比年輕地精更舒適、更糜爛、更沒有出息且完全沒有自覺的生活了。658Please respect copyright.PENANAFPHdaQdIhx
658Please respect copyright.PENANAqrCzhqMSpZ
沒辦法,誰叫它們運氣好,出生在這個輝煌的年代呢?這樣的生活才是他們應得的啊!658Please respect copyright.PENANArlNPdd9EZ3
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短篇故事集
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ISSUE #5
我們做的東西才不會爆炸!
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