**Warning** Angst, Dean is an asshole. Some language, unrequited/requited feelings. Injured Raeder. Brief description of injury and SPN level violence. Angry reader. Fluff. I think that’s it.9Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKTuKmJQqM
Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam x Reader.
Word Count: 26899Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidvCk3PRui
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It had been a long hunt. You were tired, the boys were tired, everyone was in a grumpy mood. So you sat quietly in the back seat of Baby, knowing better than to open your mouth right now. It wasn’t wise to test Dean when he was in a good mood, but when he was tired and annoyed; that was downright stupid.
You could feel his eyes on you occasionally in the rearview mirror. You refused to meet his gaze. Looking out the window, watching the Texas countryside fly by. It was all you could do to make it through this hunt, his comments and constant belittling of you didn’t help your state of mind either. You were unfortunately stuck with the Winchesters right now, so you just decided the only way to deal with Dean and his constant ability to be an absolute asshole was just avoid, and ignore him as much as possible.
Two days ago you stopped talking to him completely, and barely even acknowledge him when he gave instructions on hunts. It was literally driving him insane, and you knew it, but you just didn’t have the fight in you anymore it took to stand toe to toe with him.
Your mind wandered back to the last fight you had with him the day before you left to go on this hunt with him.
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“I know you don’t think you’re actually going on this hunt, ” Dean said, as you descended the stairs into the bunker with your duffle bag over your shoulder.
“Your brother called, said he needed some help with a vamp nest you boys were about to take down in Southeast Texas, asked me to tag along because I was in the area, is that a problem for you Dean?” you asked the eldest Winchester, stopping at the bottom of the stairs.
“Yes, it is a problem. I don’t know why my brother thought we needed you of all people to help take down a simple vamp nest, but we’re gonna handle this just fine without you. So you can see yourself out.” he said, closing the distance between the two of you, towering over you, trying to use his sheer height advantage to make himself look threatening.
“You need to crawl your little ass back in your car, and find someone else to leech off of sweetheart, we don’t need you. Every hunt we have to do with you, I have to step in and save your ass. If I wanted another liability on a hunt, I would have called the Ghostfacers.”
You wanted more than anything to knock that cocky smirk right off his face, but you knew Sam would lose his shit if you hit his brother.
“Fuck you, Winchester. I can carry my own damn self. I don’t need you to save me, I’m not some damsel in distress…”
Dean jumped in before you could even finish your sentence, almost chest to chest with you now.
“Listen to me bitch, you are a piss poor excuse for a hunter, your reckless, and stupid. You don’t think three feet ahead of yourself, and if you had any fucking sense, which you obviously don’t, you would walk out that door right now, and go wait tables or some shit, because that’s all you really qualified to do.”
That stung. You’d been hunting since you were Dean’s age, even though he was 10 years older than you. You both got thrown into the hunter's life the same way, you both were just kids when your mother’s died. Your sister wasn’t as lucky as Sammy though.
You opened your mouth to say something, but Dean stepped back and walked off before you could respond.
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The insults and constant criticism of everything you did from then on got worse and worse as the days passed, and you all worked on the hunt. The vamps nest was bigger than you all had thought, and when you all snuck in during the day, to take them out “easy” according to Dean, while they were sleeping. They weren’t in fact “sleeping”, but very much awake, and it took all of you everything you had in you to take them all down.
Two of them had you back into a corner, and if it wasn’t for Dean, you’d either be dead or in transition right now. It wasn’t your fault it happened though, you three had thought you had wiped out the whole nest, and you were walking out behind the boys when two vamps grabbed you and tried to drag you back into the house. Dean and his cat-like reflexes cut both their heads off, but not before they had pulled you down by your hair, and drug you a few feet across the dirty cabin floor, leaving a nasty gash on the back of your leg.
Dean tried to check it before you climbed into Baby, but you refused to look at him or let him touch you. You tie your flannel around your leg tightly to stop the bleeding until you could get to the motel to stitch yourself up, and slammed the car door in his face instead of letting him do anything.
Sam said nothing, just watched the exchange. He had not been thrilled with the way his brother had been treating you this week. Making you sleep on the couch, refusing to share a bed with you while knowing Sam was way too tall to share that little full-sized bed with. Everything that came out of his mouth to you for the past three days was an insult. Even though you just took it, and didn’t even speak to him Dean never let up. Sam figured he deserved it, and just smirked getting into the car.
Finally, after what felt like forever, Dean pulled into the parking lot of the rundown dump you were staying at. Getting out of the car you limped toward the front of the hotel where the lobby was located.
“Y/N! What are you doing? Come on let us stitch that up!” Dean yelled after you, but you refused to respond, just kept limping toward the front of the hotel, cursing the guy for putting your room all the way in the back of the hotel when you checked in with the boys.
You could hear Dean coming up behind you, he tried to grab your arm, and you turned on your heels. Before you can control your own actions, anger and hurt won out, and you slapped him as hard in the face as you could with your thrown off balance. It was still hard enough to make him stumble backward, which you made a mental note to smirk about later. Right now you were too angry.
Dean looked at you with his hand on the side of his face like a deer caught in the headlights. Which was very funny coming from a big, strong, manly hunter; but you didn’t have the strength to laugh right now.
You just turned around and started your trip back to the front of the hotel. This time it was Sam running up behind you. Grabbing you by the shoulders, and turning you around to face him. He was smart enough to keep a hold on you though so you couldn’t slap him. You could see Dean standing at the same stop, still looking stunned and holding his face.
“Y/N, where are going?” he said, a look of concern on his face.
“To get my own room. I’ve had enough of Dean and his shit, I want to put some distance between me and your brother before I kill him in his sleep, Sam.”
Sam pulled you into a tight hug, and you felt tears falling down your face that you had held at bay the whole ride back to the hotel. After a few minutes he let you go, Dean still stood at a safe distance watching the two of you.
“Wait here, and I’ll go get you a room. Then I’ll come and stitch your leg up.”
You nodded, not saying anything, wiping your face, and hoping Dean hadn’t seen you cry because you knew he’d have something mean to say to you about it.
You hobbled your way over to the bench that wasn’t far from where you were standing and sat down to wait for Sam to come back with your room key. When you looked up though it wasn’t Sam, but Dean standing over you.
“Y/n… I…”
“Get away from her Dean, she’s had enough of you, and I don’t blame her,” Sam said, coming to your rescue. Helping you get to your feet and he leads you to your room away from Dean.
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Two hours later your leg had been stitched and bandaged, thanks to Sam, and you had showered and gotten into your favorite oversized T-shirt and boy shorts. Not bothering to put sleeping pants on because the boys were staying in another room down the breezeway from you, and were there alone. Plus it hurt to have too much rubbed against your injured leg.
You were almost dozing off when you heard a knock on your door. Thinking it was Sam bringing you food that he’d promised he’d bring to you, you just yelled “It’s open,” not bothering to get up to look at who it was.
The door opened slowly, and Dean stuck his head in your room. You rolled over on your side away from the door as he entered and closed the door slowly behind him. A bag of food in one hand, and a bag from what looked like the drug store in the other.
“Hey,” he said timidly, placing the stuff on your nightstand in front of you. Childishly, but you were to weak and tired to run with an injury, you rolled over on your other side. Trying to not look at him, and refusing to answer him.
“Y/N, Please… You need to eat, and I brought you something for pain. I know that’s gotta hurt.”
You laid there facing the wall, not saying anything, and still refusing to look at the handsome hunter. Even though you were hurt deeply, even though you were angrier than you’d ever been in your life, your heart still skips a beat when those beautiful green eyes meet yours.
Right now though, you hate it, you want to be mad. You have every right to be angry. Dean had been nothing but nasty to you the whole time you were on this hunt with the Winchesters from the point that you walked into the bunker. He’d repeatedly ripped your heart out and stomped on it. Now, even though he’s devastatingly handsome, even though you have spent nights when you weren’t even with the Winchesters dreaming of just laying next to him, your trust was broken along with your heart, and you didn’t even know if you were able to forgive him.
“Listen, I know you’re angry with me, you have every right to be… I’ve been a horrible dick to you ever since you stepped foot in the bunker. That was wrong.. I’m an idiot. I was hoping that if I discouraged you from coming with us you wouldn’t be put in harm’s way. I didn’t want to see you hurt, and I thought I was protecting you."
You felt the bed dip under his weight as he sat down on the bed next to you, and his hand came down on your shoulder, which you instinctively pulled away from. You couldn’t see him, but you could have sworn you felt him flinch.
"Y/N, I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do to make what I did better. I don’t know how to take it all back. If I did I would. You have every right to be mad at me. Please understand that I did it because I’m in love with you, I thought if you stayed away then you wouldn’t be hurt like you are right now. When that fucking thing grabbed you it was like looking at my worse nightmare. I can’t stand the thought of having to burn your body sweetheart.”
You could feel the tears falling down our faces now. You couldn’t understand what you were hearing. The Dean Winchester just said he loved you… That’s impossible… You must have hit your head harder than you thought, and you were hallucinating… But his hand on your shoulder just now felt very real, his bodyweight next to you, sitting on the bed. That was very real…
Turning to face him slowly you saw he looked horrible. He was paler than usual. He looked completely exhausted. You couldn’t make your voice work. All those hateful things he’d said to you still ringing in your head. No matter what he was saying, or how tired he looked.
“I’m not expecting you to forgive me right now, fuck I’ll be lucky if you ever forgive me at all, but I’m not going anywhere, Sweetheart. I’m going to stay here and make sure your taken care of. I came so fucking close to losing you today. Our lives are short. We probably will never live to see 60. I only probably got 10 years left if I’m lucky.”
You laid there staring at his hand on yours. You didn’t pull away this time. When you looked up at him again to your surprise he had real tears falling down his God-like face. It made your heart seize up in your chest in spite of you.
“Please Y/N, say something. I can’t take the silence anymore. "
You knew he was telling the truth. The silence was getting pretty cruel at this point.
"I don’t know what to say to you, Dean. You really, really hurt me.”
You hated how weak your voice sounded. You were a hunter. Right now though you felt like a child.
He sat there with his head down. He looked tired and defeated, just like you felt.
After a few minutes, he got up and nodded his head. Looking like he’d had his heart ripped out and stomped on himself. Heading for the door with his head down.
“Where are you going?” you ask before you could stop yourself.
“You don’t want me here,” he said, not turning around, talking to his feet. “You got your own room because I’ve been such an ass, and you wanted to get away from me… I made you hate me.”
Sitting up you looked at the man that was so strong he carried everyone, the man that never showed weakness, he looked so weak right now., so done. It made you realize even though he was always trying to carry everyone else’s problems, no one ever tried to help him carry his.
Maybe he wasn’t lying just to make you feel better, maybe he was telling the truth.
“Stay,” you half-whispered, but he heard you, turning slowly to look at you.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure Dean, stay…”
He had a lot of making up to do, but maybe it was best to start at the beginning. Relationships are a give and take thing. If one of you doesn’t give this was never going to work. He just gave. That couldn’t have been easy for him. If you were going to not lose this chance you were going to have to take his apology.
Dean came back over to the bed cautiously. Sitting down on the edge before you pulled the covers up, signaling him to slip underneath with you. Which he did slowly.
“You know it’s going to take me a very long time to fully forgive you, Dean,” you tell him as you snuggle into his side. His strong arms wrapping around you immediately, pulling you into him.
“I know, I’m so, so, so sorry.”
Putting your hand over his chest where you could feel his heart beating you take a deep breath. Breathing in a scent that was uniquely Dean. Gunpowder, whiskey, and his cologne.
Things weren’t going to be easy for the two of you, but you had to start somewhere, and here in his arms felt like a pretty good place.
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