致美好正常的過去
如何才能再次像一個正常人地存在生活
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其實作為宿主，並不是唯一死刑364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLVCZNE4Gt
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前提，是特殊情況之下364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGVaFVUprNo
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這也是大概為什麼KDUL能趕到此地的原因吧364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBL3GfZJGPj
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大概364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCFn73t629Q
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這也是為什麼我一開始如此被幼稚騎劫理性的原因364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv63kapFMn4
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這也是為什麼我的人生如此「不正常」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVkCmhYdSx
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「⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztA2IeGN4c
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突然間吹來的陣風，由兩腿直上，大腿、大腿內側，臉到眼皮上，睜眼364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWNEOsjGKln
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「⋯⋯啊？呀？！啊？！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVjHSWh8ub
「不、不要！拜、拜托！別捉弄人家了！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWtVW7dN80
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想直接鑽入桶內，雖叫不可行，若把裙子扯至能遮蔽的地方，可是會遭流水沾到，在極致羞恥的時候364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpZlDnhPxI
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不良日常性時候364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGvp8IcKrqH
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身體總是遲遲未能反應，倒是淚會第一時間衝出，明明是不會有對手和其比得到反應速度，再說，不要論這般只是叫他們變本加厲364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE6yXCC3giU
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「還『人家人家』，女生又不是，男生又不是，人妖就人妖啦！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaIbGSqi0A7
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「哇～來看看娘娘腔！噁～」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTSFQoUe8u
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「不要這樣啦！是半個女生⋯半個怪物啦！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWULzc6J0IW
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「你們不要這樣說水無月啦！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasUKYT9AnG
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「對、對呀！好壞哦！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6WjUgkpn92
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「嗯～可是呢，要不是待下他變怪物咬人啦！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJXKi66krK
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「看呀！有尾巴和耳朵了！」
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崎品宿主是有後天性以外的可能，先天性，我就是其一，跨代遺傳，親父母經過詳細驗證後，結果仍為陰性，但舅父⋯
『不要！不要！求你了！』
『好痛喔！停下來嘛！！』
『嗚咽啊！！唔咳咿呀！』
『嗚咽⋯』
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⋯⋯簡單來說，是剛巧地，遺傳了基因缺陷364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxvtJPNn2V
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由誕生的那瞬間，身體患輕微白化病，更是出現了雙性徵⋯先天缺陷*，而原因？是因為崎品的激素，影響的不直接是我，而是母家的基因，對崎品的感染不抗拒性，先天傳了下來，我便在母體內感染，便這樣⋯來到了世上364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgy6ETOUXM
*(5-alpha-reductase deficiency)
被當成異類般364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbb33x66BU
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「呀！來了、來了！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwfwbM5w1L
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「走啊～」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYF5swPzLX6
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而怪物、猛獸，若是想與人共聚，必須有所牽制，有能防止其「暴亂」的存在，有一個「主人」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkZyZctqS5
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構成「異類」的形象，是分別要有兩種因素 —— 「怪異」 和 「不親和性」，我的存在主要是前者，而有後者特性的，是⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfD0UJxIB4I
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他364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF8pHfWFGyQ
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「又被欺負了嗎？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡevEpYpCRIe
MUC- 311602，3月11日16時02分，是我誕生的那刻
以自己出生時間為名的他，是我人生第一個遇見的人形，也是伴隨我成長的唯一，不是「朋友」，也絕不可能是，但我承認他存在，使我真正成為「怪物」的存在364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqppDyzyFN
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並非和現在，即此刻，普遍所見的人形設計明顯地不一，應該是和現在日本廳長同一型號，我才不知道，只是認得同樣的白色，如水晶一樣反光的皮膚，還有如膠管一樣的頭髮364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRGMSZpQmB
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可能是那不平常的外表，也可能是仔細觀察，便能得見腰間的鋁合金盒子，還有那冰冷的氣場364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAonyZAHe1
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老實說，當唯一照顧、保護自己也是帶來傷害的，就特別顯得自己孤獨，因為沒有其他人去依賴，不得不望向唯一，守望同時傷害自己的他，這也是為什麼他從來並不是我的朋友，我恨他，但也無可奈何地，他不在身邊自己則是會被傷害，恨不下，愛不上，若是重來不有他的存在的話，反是好364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtyUlYEyN8
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先天性宿主，除了有人形監視外還有晶片，頸部植入一塊追蹤及有抑制系統之晶片，喲，不就放生的標準動作無誤嘛？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW4hqbIUWz9
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⋯⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqHTiJCtP6
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怎也好呢364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFzjoT5U8n
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「⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6cyElPA2f3
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「為什麼不鎖門呢？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLszeFZe4xt
「去廁所也好歹開個燈呢⋯不阻你了」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiSXYmjEqhh
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—— 咔 ——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJQ5dFLuSv
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⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmd6xmD0W8U
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⋯⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohyYBD8UGo
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「⋯⋯就是不想讓人知道我在這呀⋯啊⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlruzBWCzus
「嗚⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLgCX5QUjp
本來以為到中學便會情況有所好轉，但不見得
關上位於男廁和女廁之間的大門，位於午膳時間的走廊不算多人，但任憑一對好奇、厭惡，有眼色的視線落在身上，便如同把自己摳打著364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8WV185pZBG
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最好便把自己弄到和標誌上的人同一個模樣364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mjxQNfqEi
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傷殘
「同學，請問——」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm6QRFGMRS1
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「啊？！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IoW6H5P9Q
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—— 啪噹 ——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn6w8CuwsIC
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害怕視線交流，也害怕交流本身364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8R0WY7NpAl
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但儘管這樣，自己也希望「正常」起來，和那孩子一樣，和這孩子一樣，和⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItrflzVRxX
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她一樣364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFTvOZvD5b
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乖巧、友善、親人，她是我的相反364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc11mW9TbJV
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在我的眼中，她根本是另一個世界的人364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTtLxvsdLV8
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「對不起！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynC5zV2wzy
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拾起地上的餐具，裏面為紅色，外面則是黑色的便當盒，低著頭，跪在地上，不行，不能，我討厭這樣，拜托離開我吧，請——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrwkprr7aOk
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「來」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4L8VeSX9Z
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「⋯謝謝」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwP4NW9Zfr8
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我討厭這樣的自己，特別是在她面前，在襯衫胸袋上有紅字黃底襟章的她前，作為風紀股長的她前364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQYdZUQ6n5p
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怎麼説呢，或許在初中的我，存在只會被她確定364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxiNPkEN7O
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雖然實際上的欺凌少了，但取而代之，是絕對的冷漠，情況不可以叫好轉，說到底，我並不是那種凡事沒問題，可接受的人，嘛，好歹是個頑固的，自己不相信自己是，好歹⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5V6TYTO5H
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我並不是沒遇過更壞的事364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6ctKzFdch
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「那個，水無月？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIwQCuULb2
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「怎麼了？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTvifXgvZS
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正因這樣，我不希望在唯一前，做出會被否定的行為，例如表現得像個孩子，表現失禮⋯被發現是「廁所飯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxy9uYqiCp1
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各種364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAfS3aSVzV
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所以說，活得正常，對於自己來說的話，難道是奢侈的嗎？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCTlnR6afFI
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「⋯我回來了」
快樂是一種⋯只能回顧的味道，因為太容易習慣，就好像不到零下一度就總是以為暑假一定是三十度，熱時寧願凍，冷時寧願天氣熱，會習慣、忘記、太輕易被其他情緒蓋過、混於一起，是説在開心的時候不會察覺自己在笑的道理364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvmVazK5JL
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且只能回味364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivcQg5eDOz
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「回來了嗎，島見？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlnuD5Sk7PE
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「嗯，回來了，媽媽⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSm3TZIS9W2
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放下背包是確實地放下了負累，仍然是前所未有的感覺，當然，回味的時候才發覺，畢竟那時的感覺，純粹是當下，是「發生了」而已364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3d2vL73RRd
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「喲，島見，聽媽媽說，媽媽今天——」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhQnMh2G5t
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「媽媽⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArUygoJDPV
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「⋯⋯是的？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstt8Vy5zcO
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回想起來，自己啊，真是不會珍惜，不知足呢364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2V09gvOvD
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「明天也是⋯便當不用弄我的份了」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkBVSpEmJZx
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語畢，我跑到樓上去，嘗試把微笑藏著，但有些情緒是不能隱藏起來，例如自小的抑鬱與自卑，還有這刻極為奇特的轉變，媽媽知道，爸爸也是，一直以來也知道，這點我也知道364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxdf6jBEYN
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我可不是小孩子了⋯⋯呢364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkq4FBEEWcI
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呢364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOluMBRLWb
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開始了不知多久，三個月？至少一個學期吧，事情就如此突然，事情就如此戲劇性，能和她一起，彷彿為一個幻想，不同世界的人，居然可以坐在這裏，我居然會被人照顧，世上接納自己的外人居然存在364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ85auxRv9l
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幸福曾經存在，我經歷過，品嚐過，居然能有如此的一刻364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Mg4OAryNd
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來得太突然了
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「那個，水無月，怎說呢⋯本來還以為你是個⋯怎說呢⋯⋯難親近的人呢」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMAklB308h
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「欸？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNq8gH5aJuH
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「哈哈～不過看起來只是氣息而已」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEd9t42aTGO
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「這樣嗎⋯？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7dWYluiUk
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也太順利了
也才得意忘形
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「赤⋯賀羽醬可真是個好朋友呢！」
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逐漸自滿起來364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92lhwq6caT
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「生日快樂！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDTIxIPU62C
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「這個是你弄的嗎？謝謝♡～」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhf9lNcWALP
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太過成功才使人後悔啊364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkuIBNoJHB
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「⋯賀羽⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzUAoqLry96
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「⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANPi2IBjYW
「所以說⋯你的⋯你的答覆是—— 啊⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOjiXqAxrNC
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—— 噗 ——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVeaX0IhHZ5
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「喜歡」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bKhKTYAM1
「⋯⋯嗯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRbrjCV8HxC
「賀羽？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOUotDmD10m
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「嗚⋯咽⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZuUtbPzfy1
「太好了⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUHU8ozZg02
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如果時間能稍微走慢點就好呢⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZEY7L2jjG
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如果⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSPtiRtu5vC
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持續這樣順利就好了呢⋯⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppfKnll4aM
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來得太突然了，去得太突然364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGz1STQ555A
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「什麼？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQ6SNMGBTs
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「⋯對不起⋯⋯賀羽，我也不想的——」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKsUormfiW
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消息是事實，將會發生，不久之後，即使伸出雙手，也抓不住多少，留不下什麼，什麼也沒有，改變不了什麼364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUv4g05nphi
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「你和人家道歉有什麼用啊⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG98JZYO3ip
「我⋯我已經一無所有了⋯嗚⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VRbn00HLF
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「⋯對不起⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHtQrNavJM
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對不起有什麼用？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRiC85AZ54
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道歉又有什麼用？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjF6bQHuLJK
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卻364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mRTLDcwOa
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如何裝飾過的精麗動人的言詞，終究改變不了364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsErlIuCQi4
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要説再見了嗎？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyaGuGOsFg
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我不想364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyZFd1cfQQ
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我不想笑著，和若無其事一樣，說再見，回到那個「正常」的日子，回歸那樣的生活中364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0h8NirnLjb
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這下子不只是離別，是失去，奪走364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbv1eYn09SW
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我不想那樣子364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BxKk17NOt
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但如同自己所提及，我做不了什麼，不，其實可能是有，或許有這麼個機會，我找不到而已，我不肯去找而已364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzByi8hRnko
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對，我經不起失敗，我承受不了錯誤了364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyA7JffWAQ
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不在這般的前半生之後364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yb8JAGm6C
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⋯⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ33eWfN4XCl
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無論如何，日子倒是來了364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9yZdntHtt5
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最後的笑容，就在當刻364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtVP4svZh4
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無人知曉的山林，看不到任何建築物，唯見山林和草木拼起的大地，背著式微的陽光，黃昏的太陽到此刻亦為燃燒自己的存在而已，靠在她的懷中，帽外套吸收的陽光、溫暖叫我熱得出汗，但不行，我不可以放手，放不了手，我才不要這樣子結束364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVLq6AerITB
364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbbmRQFdEsP我不接受364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgCOia9F5p
364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfpesu1lOG我不接受364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtuwea4zWT
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—— 啾 ——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0UdzF0EMmq
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我不接受364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYHKPKBjUw
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「賀羽⋯？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4VhLj0WBzB
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—— 啾 ——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSvjWyu0II
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「賀⋯⋯羽⋯這樣⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbHzHglUQg
「啾⋯咕⋯⋯不⋯唔⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGP9bqNcAkK
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我不接受這樣的結果364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNroOvjVuhA
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「嗚哇啊？！！賀羽！住、住手！拜託了！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3rjS22KCu
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當時的我，只是任憑感覺去而已364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWA5GEfeD9
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「不、不行啊！！嗚哇！賀羽！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVrlAxsoohu
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我的本性364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapu2ZoIzGi
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「救命呀！嗚 —— 救我 ——」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnfP7LNObVv
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—— 啪 ——364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBk0UWro6cR
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「給我閉嘴」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvb8LhuePDP
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「—— 嗚⋯⋯！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTkXlhkjJ0E
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我終究只是野獸而已呢364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdIUqIUfbIG
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「⋯怎麼？！呀⋯？！嗚！停下來！求你了！！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNq3VSxK7ks
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「沒用的⋯你自己看呀⋯哈哈⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt6CslwYR21
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而作為人形野獸真的該死364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUprYaUvjp
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如此痛苦也是活該364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkX7yaXIMx
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忘記不能也是364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfmNcyHvIl
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「我可把晶片挖出來了！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEuFbRDsRg
「現在靜靜的認命吧！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UZNnv0rXl
「張開口！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡom1wAzSlCA
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「嗚咳啊⋯嗯？！咳 —— 咕唔？！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOMaUAZx3O
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發現了嗎？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXQ0HhppTV
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「好痛啊！不、不要！！咿嗚哇啊！」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEEj0XMP0z
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這可是我的「正常」呀
自討苦吃的日常
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這道、那道疤痕也是，見證著364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgzpHZHQxZV
364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjx2duogiA9
我的「正常」，純粹自欺欺人而已
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「嗚⋯嗚⋯⋯嗚⋯咽⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaRS0Z8lBRE
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「為什麼⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHBCHscGnt
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我所嚮往的364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFF103a02x
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所謂的364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYYcXiLLRl
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「正常」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE60ZcgEae8
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純粹是個謊言364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxCNwBJu0q
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「嗚⋯嗚⋯⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYhST6fTw6N
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「⋯你要是說出去，我可真的把你殺了」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbvXlrFkA87
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⋯⋯364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyK8L2nlkx7
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所以說，我是異類嗎？364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDKESow6O7x
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「⋯⋯再見了」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6ySssJYec
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當然364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHQra5uioe
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那麼這份「不正常」是自出生而有的嗎？
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「切」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dHa6TqdhZ
「等了這麼久⋯嗯？」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbEQ3rsUJc
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氣息在小巷傳來，張開眼睛，長髮的，走過了我的狩獵範圍364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqW2pgoIZi
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「嘿⋯」364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbaVovixFh
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自討而已364Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmJYR5anYAp
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正常，從來只是一個藉口
快樂便是生活著而活得有意義
大概吧？
ns216.73.216.224da2
然後按「加至主畫面」