[FANFIC - HBD, KARIN!] PÉRIODICITÉ (SK)
Title: périodicité439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusLXTUYaqc
By: Kanae (Goth-Punk88 @ ff.net)439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl1Z3SQZXC2
Rating: K+439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ljjoD4yFY
Word Count: 2.817439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAysapE8V5
Author's Notes: Made for our "Karin's birthday week" over at the Ice&Spice FC @ NF ♥ I... don't even know what this is, or where it came from, and it's possibly one of the cheesiest pieces I've written for SK. But I kind of regret nothing lol - Oh and that novice drawing at the top of the fic? yup, mines. guilty as charged orz439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IcFE2AD0f
Summary: June 20 has never been an ordinary day for one Uzumaki Karin.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJrh3glMtTp
périodicité (periodicity)439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5c4jqLdoIY
"recurrence at regular intervals of time."
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périodicité;439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMJBqukvnl
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by Kanae
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“Don’t look so down, darling. This is a great chance for you.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLy6G4MruD
“…Yeah… a great chance to make a fool of myself, you mean.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMCs2kN07D
A twinkling laugh, a delicate hand warmly lands over a girl’s head and—
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At twelve, there aren’t many things that Karin has done or that she wishes to do. She is just an ordinary girl from an ordinary family living in an ordinary village; there is nothing special about her, nothing out of the norm, nothing that makes her stand out—if one ignores her flagrant red hair, that is.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxhAI33JRP
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But that is just what her father seems to have wanted to do all along.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtyUb8goUNn
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You’re going out? Don’t forget to put your hood on, Karin, he would say, whenever Karin had to wander away from the immediate realms of their home. Why, papa? She used to ask when she was no more than a little girl; but that was a habit that slowly but surely withered and died as she began to grow up—as she started to grow aware enough to notice the wary air her father’s kind, wise red eyes acquired as the reminder left his lips.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrggAE8uwpE
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As she grew older, Karin learned to recognize it for what it truly was: more a warning than a piece of advice; and she began to grow more jittery as result, more worn at the seams.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFMWKEGDeb
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Her red hair was her only outstanding trait, the only thing that made her different—without it, Karin may as well fade into the scenery.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iAanijzCq
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She may as well not exist.
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—and ruffles her hair.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6954HA3JpG
“Now, now, don’t be like that. I have a good feeling about this, you know?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxzzV0p9xw
“…What do you mean, mama?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8LSv1HGbK
A secretive smile highlighted by—
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At thirteen, Karin nearly dies.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymgL6bkC4h
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And then she is saved—saved by a striking boy with a rich voice and eyes that warm her up to the core the moment he smiles—at her, for her—and suddenly, Karin does not feel so ordinary anymore.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjXGcaNR4AP
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There is something different about you, her mother tells her once with a knowing smile, ever since you came back from Konoha.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPPaSN4KRyK
Karin jumps in her seat, awkward denial bubbling up in her throat and evaporating the moment her mother laughs, I like it. You look prettier, Karin.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGUzaJBHGF
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She does not know about that—can’t see any difference as she looks at herself in the mirror, self-consciously pulling on some strands of red hair and squinting at her reflection.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxMd02gDWC
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What she does know, though—what she can’t forget, is—439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpkVVhPqr9
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See ya, he had said, and it takes Karin a surprising amount of time to realize that, for the first time since she could remember, there was something she wanted.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYXOy7Einj
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Wanted for herself; not for her parents, not for those she cares about. Something that was completely hers, in all its staggering intensity and youthful hope.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaid7M1DhoT
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See ya, he had said, and until then Karin had never quite known how good it felt to feel alive.
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—by amber eyes that seem to spark.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMJCsxc21y
“Ara~ I wonder if I should tell you. It is a safely guarded secret, you see.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp5ywO3eJ9e
“I will keep it! I promise, I won’t tell anybody, mama!”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmaZPvMzcf
A chuckle, “Alright, alright! Since you insist, I'll tell you. It—”
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At fourteen, Karin breathes her last breath.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNpu4A5Oab
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There is no blood—not hers—involved, nor are there any wounds—not physical ones—or any white walls or tunnels and gates of light—no light, only dark—only smoke—only the smell of burnt flesh and intest—439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZHp2Qu3QR9
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There is, however, anguish. An agony so great that Karin bit her lip until it bled, fisted her palms until her nails left permanent crescent-moon shaped scars in the contours of her skin, new batches added to already cracked life lines.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtKKNY6C7s
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There are silent, chocked sobs that made her throat burn and her sight blur until she has ran out of tears.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvjlgSxbKR
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And there is also horror; a burning, paralyzing sort of horror that reaches its peak and fades into a mute but perpetual tune stringing the chords of her being as she comes back and stares at the corpses of her father and mother, unrecognizable masses of ashes retching of burnt blood and bodily fluids that make a pile of vile crawl its way up to her tongue.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpb31FUSAoh
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And then, there is he—sidestepping the man with ominous dark chakra and extending a hand towards her, onyx eyes boring into her own with the same might with which the understanding in his chakra drove her horror away.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAsZVFIoFY
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You staying here will amount to nothing, but you leaving just might, he says. Come, Karin, he calls.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHX0TvVHgVX
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She takes his hand, and there is hope.
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“—It is said that one too many women in our family have found their fate in the lands of Konohagakure.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI7fUnMGR2m
“Their… fate?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡImpJeGlPEw
Her voice curls up around the edges, as if it were a spell.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrCAMenJuvb
“You will understand in—”
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At fifteen, Karin has shed her skin.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe9zPDWQ6Ks
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There are now sharp edges where there used to be soft contours; angry frowns where there used to be kindness, smirks where there used to be smiles; buoyancy where there once was shame, barriers in what once were vast landscapes—and there are also scars.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYbNNvzZja
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Tell-tale scars of the Karin she used to be and new, revolting ones from the Karin she has become. She hides the latter and denies the former; pretends they’re long gone, never aching, never hurting anymore.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvxdbC2jhi
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Yet, he sees them all. As if she wore them on her sleeve.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm98q8gYvD4
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“Say, Sasuke, since we’re alone how about we—”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOhOcYNp8y
“I have to leave soon, Karin.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsZjuHUHaaI
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She puts her glasses back on and crosses her arms with a frown, moving away from him. “Why did you even bother coming, then?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVWCO3k6gfI
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Sasuke says nothing, then. He says nothing, and Karin straightens, her back suddenly assaulted by gooseflesh; could he—?439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6H3g7iAcU
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Could he have possibly known? Known how before his unexpected arrival, Karin had been hounded by her memories. Seeing familiar faces in the nameless prisoners of the base, ghosts come back to haunt her and pull her down with them to the depths of hell—a hell made of nothing but flames and guilt of mistakes she is not sure she would take back, even if she could.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzC4Rult9SX
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“…I had business here, is all.” His voice reaches out to her through the haze of her thoughts, pulling her back with nonchalant words that seemed devoid of any meaning.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgAxshUV36
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But as she turns and her eyes meet his, Karin sees.
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“—in due time, Karin.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5wortItrq
“Still, mama… it just isn’t fair.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaa32BJstIu
“What isn’t, dear?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaM4BurkgZ7
“… I wanted to spend my birthday with you and papa.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfweHSWZGFf
Her smile—
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At sixteen, Karin falls.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU3fjkf8rPC
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She falls from a great, great height at appalling speed; she hasn’t even had time to acknowledge the abysm before she has hit rock bottom, her goals and dreams spilling through her open chest and pooling on the ground alongside everything she knows.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXPqi413fkL
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Alongside everything she once held dear. Everyone she relied on. The one she trusted.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtZLRcTTkbp
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Now, there was no one left.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOi6UYgA5j
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No one left but the roaming, empty carcass of the boy she once loved; the boy who taught her what it felt like to be alive, the boy who gave her hope and helped her find meaning back when she had lost her way, the boy who helped her to be reborn from her ashes into someone better; someone stronger, someone capable of standing up for herself and for him, too. The boy who flared her will and her drive with a single touch, with a single look, with the simplest of words—439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNfVEavyYl
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I need you439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGMs4vAJej
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“So much for that,” Karin mutters to no one, her back pressed against the cold walls of a cell and her fingers absentmindedly tracing the ghost of the wound that had taken her heart out for good.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4jNgIZTlJ
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And then it comes. An almost unnoticeable flicker—too subtle to be perceived, but too longed for to be ignored.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX1QJhSnZum
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No… I’ve had enough, Sasuke but her withered heart is trying to beat again, and it makes up her mind for her.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1WBNEFZEb
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“…So much for this,” Karin murmurs to herself—and then she is on her feet again, her inner eye tracing his every move.
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—melts.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2Ac6hOy4y
“Cheer up, love. There will be many birthdays left for us to celebrate together.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUaiJQv3MEQ
“… You promise?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfVyPTMI2w
Her gaze softens.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeA7RdlMYU
“I promise.”
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At seventeen, Karin kisses him.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAzk6Hj9Og
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She impulsively crashes her lips against his, her arms thrown around his neck in a desperate attempt to hold onto him—to anchor him down before his essence could have the chance to fade into pitch black darkness again, to feel him before he could have the chance to waste his life—her life, their future—chasing phantoms all the way to the death.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ugGQKfmUs
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When the impromptu kiss ends, Karin sees him—the him she knows, the him she loves—flickering across his eyes for the briefest of moments, and she hears her name resounding in her ears even though he has not uttered a single sound.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡywEfsmbdy1
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She smiles ruefully; trembling eyes boring into his—and then wordlessly lets him go.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhyy4bx9Nul
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She has given him a reason, but the choice is his to make.
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“Ha, so it was about a boy, I knew it!”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPuUXwYYR7
“Shh, mama! I don’t want papa to hear! And… it’s not like I’m ever going to see him again, anyway….”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdzvesJx7S
Her mother has to hide her smile, “Actually, Karin… something tells me you just might.”
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At eighteen, Sasuke kisses her back.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiAcUrGA34O
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It is not nearly as passionate as her—their—first kiss had been; there is no desperation, no adrenaline—but there is craving all the same, waving through the serenity threading over her through the gentle pressure of his fingertips over the nape of her neck, enveloping her like a makeshift cloak and warming her down to her very core.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnfaZRk0YG
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And Karin feels her very essence quiver under it—under the warmth and the way her heart seemed to want to leave her and jump into him instead, to claim the home it has always longed for; the home it has always fought for.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYncItjBFeD
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The home it belonged to.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLGrqj6SeQ
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As he kisses her, sunrays clumsily dancing upon her lips, Karin feels like she would vaporize into him if Sasuke were to take a single breath.
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“How do you know?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoCGtd6ajA
“Because, that’s how fate works, Karin.”
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At nineteen, Karin smiles.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTqeS3Lw6TN
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“Itachi,” she says, and Sasuke looks up to her, startled. “The name… Itachi. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BlcITFZiE
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Sasuke parts his lips—once, twice—but no sound comes out and soon enough he gives up altogether, lowering his eyes to stare at the bundle in his arms. It stares back at him, impossibly red eyes widened with innocent curiosity, pink tongue sticking out from underneath rosy lips.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGeJARBxMu1
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“Are you sure, Karin?” he whispers after what seemed like an eternity, and Karin’s smile only widens.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3tR8JFFKeL
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“Yeah.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdew5DFm8x
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And as she sees them—as she sees Sasuke hold their baby as if he were holding the whole, wide world in the crook of his arms—Karin remembers her mother with such vivid clarity that she catches a breath of her perfume. The memory—the vision is bittersweet, and it makes Karin’s throat clog, because she recognizes that look.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV0NRzYpUMn
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It was the way her mother used to look at her father and her, eyes brimming with love and pride, unspoken but ever-present, never changing. Karin had not been able to understand it, then—439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPFIhImvDO
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But she did, now. And the understanding squeezed her heart in a way that was both, wonderful and terrible. To think it took her this long to finally understand, once and for all, what it all meant.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCFMsKjfka
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To understand who her mother truly was, what her mother felt, what her mother desired for her—and how her mother hurt.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmfqFyOdBe
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You’re special, Karin. She would tell her sometimes, her eyes half-lidded and afflicted by thoughts she would never get the chance to say aloud. One day, you will realize that.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Bi4rHVl1j
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She realized it, now; what it meant to love to her roots, what it meant to be a woman.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxinrgXlQk
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An Uzumaki woman.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxcecVoZOi
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“… Thank you, Karin.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0m6sfifAA
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“Idiot,” she shakes her head, weakly, traitorous tears prickling at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill. “That... should be my line.”
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“They will be here soon,”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡozrTW07aFS
“Who will be here soon, mama?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLem12FCd0
“It could be anyone,” she finally replies, and her hold is steady as she combs through Karin’s hair, “we have long since lost any care for their identities, Karin. What matters is… what their presence means.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE429VLMlGS
“And what is that?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTMkY8ZBsg
Her silence provides the only answer; and Karin wishes it weren’t enough.
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At twenty, Karin celebrates her birthday for the first time in seven years.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDkD9rB6UNF
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And it starts with a soft but firm admittance whispered as she caresses the baby’s nose, all too aware of the pleasant weight of Sasuke’s gaze, of the feelings swirling in his chakra.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM3r5Tvwjx9
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Hearing them is unexpected, however—and her widened eyes snap to his only to find his lips beginning to curve, his own hand coming to caress her cheek in much the same way she was doing to their son.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1Bz8xX4Ai
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“W—what was that about?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9vrrJNNtQ
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She asks; some habits are hard to break, and her awkward way of fighting down her embarrassment seemed to be as persistent as ever.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9pQiPKaSAs
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Sasuke doesn’t seem to mind, though. If anything, his smile seems to morph into an amused smirk as he shrugs, noncommittally. “I just felt like saying it, is all.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbn8tRbRhQ8
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“Dumbass,” she mutters, hoping the darkness will hide the way her cheeks have warmed up like bonfires, so reminiscent of her prepubescent days when all she could do was a dream she would one day lay with Sasuke the way she does now. “...You didn't need to.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNac2TfDO6
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“I know, Karin,” and this time he is positively smiling, suddenly mutating back into the Sasuke that had stolen her heart so many years ago. “But it still felt good to say it.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzvNjZQWuj
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Karin says nothing in response; simply snuggles closer to him, eyes on the baby as he opens his eyes and blinks, his little hands curling and uncurling up into the air.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw2yRI0lSu5
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“He is going to be strong,” Sasuke assesses, and Karin would have mocked him by how ridiculous it was that he sounds that proud of Itachi when the baby hasn’t even said his first word yet, weren’t it because she felt the same way.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE3OCXyoDT0
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He was going to be strong. A little piece of herself and Sasuke—a memento of those who had given their life up for them; a torch for those who had granted them the chance to live this moment.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Xs9GxmGFt
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To live this happiness.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBwBxqbgefB
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“Happy birthday, Itachi,” she whispers, and squeezes Sasuke’s hand. “I love you.”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzM0UR8HeD1
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The words feel dusty, and unknown—but familiar.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NFGMilL7w
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She knew them, once.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO8yHone62W
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She has known them all along.
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I'm sorry, Karin.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavvDlbpizA
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Were the last words her mother told her before her father ushered her out of the house and prompted her to run—run as far as she could, away from them—and forced her to leave them to die.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEiP3KcmVfQ
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To survive.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKUbYUOUnOa
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Those words used to hunt Karin down in those nights when sleep refused to lend her its hand, the eerie walls of Orochimaru’s hideout caving in on her and Sasuke’s steady chakra being her only relief, her only shield.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4FCi3Scpw
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Yet, what haunted her weren’t the words themselves, but their meaning; Karin had instinctively known then, just as clear as she knows now, that her mother was not apologizing for forcing her to forsake them and live on.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFIjgNFQNK
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No, that was not it—that was not the kind of woman her mother had been.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcTdQsWxkt
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Instead, she had apologized for something else entirely.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡze46KDwYvc
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For the unsaid.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCcr5IZLCl
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“What are you thinking about, Karin?”439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡda5uVTSbRm
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Her lips curl upward as he takes the seat by her side, repentances fading away into the evening sky.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfk8AKupQT3
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“Nothing,” she replies, threading her fingers through his and gazing back to their children, who were laughing and running together through the backyard, a lively mixture of reds and blacks; the Uchiha and Uzumaki crests proudly etched on their backs, on their hearts.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4AjT6S3aem
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“Nothing at all.”
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"You will be fine."439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1JVAkx2pDB
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And through the tears and the pain and the loneliness and the longing and the hardships and the fear, Karin should have known better.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYn0angWaX
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Her mother was always right.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwnDsPITLyF
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end.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8jCpQ3f6U
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I... seriously don't know where all this came from; my best guess: Uzumaki feelings. Uzumaki feelings everywhere. lol, I tried to play with the different facets of Karin, and how she grows into each one of them; plus SK, of course.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIk8Fyy0lA
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The stuff I wrote here is not quite how I see things going, though; to do that I would have had to write about 395749574 vignettes per year, rather than only one lol so I went for rushed versions of a couple of scenarios I had thought about.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfY2GiaAjU8
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Oh and while I did not state it in the fic: every vignette takes place on Karin's birthday, so the baby was born on June 20, too.439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGW2puc69tH
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Anyway, hopefully, it wasn't that terrible! ♥439Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSkShxzmlVl
tags: fanfic, karin, naruto, sasukarin, sasuke
i'm : 
cheerful
listening to: never let me go - florence + the machine
ns18.223.213.54da2
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