[FANFIC - HBD, KARIN!] PÉRIODICITÉ (SK)
Title: périodicité518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKlAEvFHcyx
By: Kanae (Goth-Punk88 @ ff.net)518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AWrNdQluX
Rating: K+518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7ic0H4IVg
Word Count: 2.817518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJla9GbdPXl
Author's Notes: Made for our "Karin's birthday week" over at the Ice&Spice FC @ NF ♥ I... don't even know what this is, or where it came from, and it's possibly one of the cheesiest pieces I've written for SK. But I kind of regret nothing lol - Oh and that novice drawing at the top of the fic? yup, mines. guilty as charged orz518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWTpA5IuYu
Summary: June 20 has never been an ordinary day for one Uzumaki Karin.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjEtFqAKqbB
périodicité (periodicity)518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCV0HJvR10
"recurrence at regular intervals of time."
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périodicité;518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAcogL289Fd
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by Kanae
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“Don’t look so down, darling. This is a great chance for you.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmGozPmW0Q
“…Yeah… a great chance to make a fool of myself, you mean.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡao6Lw0Cuxx
A twinkling laugh, a delicate hand warmly lands over a girl’s head and—
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At twelve, there aren’t many things that Karin has done or that she wishes to do. She is just an ordinary girl from an ordinary family living in an ordinary village; there is nothing special about her, nothing out of the norm, nothing that makes her stand out—if one ignores her flagrant red hair, that is.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YXAtj3qk0
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But that is just what her father seems to have wanted to do all along.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamLwMJgXpE
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You’re going out? Don’t forget to put your hood on, Karin, he would say, whenever Karin had to wander away from the immediate realms of their home. Why, papa? She used to ask when she was no more than a little girl; but that was a habit that slowly but surely withered and died as she began to grow up—as she started to grow aware enough to notice the wary air her father’s kind, wise red eyes acquired as the reminder left his lips.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQKGy5ObcB
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As she grew older, Karin learned to recognize it for what it truly was: more a warning than a piece of advice; and she began to grow more jittery as result, more worn at the seams.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1HSDnKb2Is
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Her red hair was her only outstanding trait, the only thing that made her different—without it, Karin may as well fade into the scenery.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9h2bb4Cqii
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She may as well not exist.
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—and ruffles her hair.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9NbeBYmZ0
“Now, now, don’t be like that. I have a good feeling about this, you know?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMDjrkOJ5b
“…What do you mean, mama?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ246HppPHyU
A secretive smile highlighted by—
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At thirteen, Karin nearly dies.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ38cvHOtHS
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And then she is saved—saved by a striking boy with a rich voice and eyes that warm her up to the core the moment he smiles—at her, for her—and suddenly, Karin does not feel so ordinary anymore.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiOIatFDYhj
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There is something different about you, her mother tells her once with a knowing smile, ever since you came back from Konoha.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrQ7YPpVPp6
Karin jumps in her seat, awkward denial bubbling up in her throat and evaporating the moment her mother laughs, I like it. You look prettier, Karin.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSVq3qMK725
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She does not know about that—can’t see any difference as she looks at herself in the mirror, self-consciously pulling on some strands of red hair and squinting at her reflection.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Vmz8KpYui
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What she does know, though—what she can’t forget, is—518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7pLgqeZiH
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See ya, he had said, and it takes Karin a surprising amount of time to realize that, for the first time since she could remember, there was something she wanted.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfJunDX5kw
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Wanted for herself; not for her parents, not for those she cares about. Something that was completely hers, in all its staggering intensity and youthful hope.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQQSNaANhB
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See ya, he had said, and until then Karin had never quite known how good it felt to feel alive.
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—by amber eyes that seem to spark.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmCaLJpQl3
“Ara~ I wonder if I should tell you. It is a safely guarded secret, you see.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkVTcMiVXH
“I will keep it! I promise, I won’t tell anybody, mama!”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5cKwphuZZ
A chuckle, “Alright, alright! Since you insist, I'll tell you. It—”
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At fourteen, Karin breathes her last breath.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCrv1mCLtiu
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There is no blood—not hers—involved, nor are there any wounds—not physical ones—or any white walls or tunnels and gates of light—no light, only dark—only smoke—only the smell of burnt flesh and intest—518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8kEHApL0Qt
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There is, however, anguish. An agony so great that Karin bit her lip until it bled, fisted her palms until her nails left permanent crescent-moon shaped scars in the contours of her skin, new batches added to already cracked life lines.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbwxYv1tsl
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There are silent, chocked sobs that made her throat burn and her sight blur until she has ran out of tears.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQUFYAmgKZ
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And there is also horror; a burning, paralyzing sort of horror that reaches its peak and fades into a mute but perpetual tune stringing the chords of her being as she comes back and stares at the corpses of her father and mother, unrecognizable masses of ashes retching of burnt blood and bodily fluids that make a pile of vile crawl its way up to her tongue.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGbeiiWoib
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And then, there is he—sidestepping the man with ominous dark chakra and extending a hand towards her, onyx eyes boring into her own with the same might with which the understanding in his chakra drove her horror away.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZotHs4zPm
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You staying here will amount to nothing, but you leaving just might, he says. Come, Karin, he calls.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp52Cxb4aOq
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She takes his hand, and there is hope.
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“—It is said that one too many women in our family have found their fate in the lands of Konohagakure.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQCI0rOnRm
“Their… fate?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7dGoRGwh4
Her voice curls up around the edges, as if it were a spell.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7mah4jKsv
“You will understand in—”
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At fifteen, Karin has shed her skin.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxsiGVKDJu
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There are now sharp edges where there used to be soft contours; angry frowns where there used to be kindness, smirks where there used to be smiles; buoyancy where there once was shame, barriers in what once were vast landscapes—and there are also scars.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrwfAjovh2w
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Tell-tale scars of the Karin she used to be and new, revolting ones from the Karin she has become. She hides the latter and denies the former; pretends they’re long gone, never aching, never hurting anymore.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMNXdk03wcr
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Yet, he sees them all. As if she wore them on her sleeve.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIsRnlQ0Fv
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“Say, Sasuke, since we’re alone how about we—”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxGoXYAH5X
“I have to leave soon, Karin.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzNhEnOgoq
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She puts her glasses back on and crosses her arms with a frown, moving away from him. “Why did you even bother coming, then?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiyjRJqTSqp
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Sasuke says nothing, then. He says nothing, and Karin straightens, her back suddenly assaulted by gooseflesh; could he—?518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNZVirx9Os
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Could he have possibly known? Known how before his unexpected arrival, Karin had been hounded by her memories. Seeing familiar faces in the nameless prisoners of the base, ghosts come back to haunt her and pull her down with them to the depths of hell—a hell made of nothing but flames and guilt of mistakes she is not sure she would take back, even if she could.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfR178Dr0lv
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“…I had business here, is all.” His voice reaches out to her through the haze of her thoughts, pulling her back with nonchalant words that seemed devoid of any meaning.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ63VtnT634X
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But as she turns and her eyes meet his, Karin sees.
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“—in due time, Karin.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQr8szppi9
“Still, mama… it just isn’t fair.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bOliM73Ip
“What isn’t, dear?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLKpZNHqNS
“… I wanted to spend my birthday with you and papa.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBN5Mh4tp7
Her smile—
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At sixteen, Karin falls.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa76TlHZPB9
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She falls from a great, great height at appalling speed; she hasn’t even had time to acknowledge the abysm before she has hit rock bottom, her goals and dreams spilling through her open chest and pooling on the ground alongside everything she knows.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGvfKEnsUF
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Alongside everything she once held dear. Everyone she relied on. The one she trusted.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQDDgBOtwY8
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Now, there was no one left.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigazAIeeoL
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No one left but the roaming, empty carcass of the boy she once loved; the boy who taught her what it felt like to be alive, the boy who gave her hope and helped her find meaning back when she had lost her way, the boy who helped her to be reborn from her ashes into someone better; someone stronger, someone capable of standing up for herself and for him, too. The boy who flared her will and her drive with a single touch, with a single look, with the simplest of words—518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5OK7XOiAe8
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“So much for that,” Karin mutters to no one, her back pressed against the cold walls of a cell and her fingers absentmindedly tracing the ghost of the wound that had taken her heart out for good.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡugPBKaIxrZ
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And then it comes. An almost unnoticeable flicker—too subtle to be perceived, but too longed for to be ignored.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKYoVBdpjY
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No… I’ve had enough, Sasuke but her withered heart is trying to beat again, and it makes up her mind for her.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uHeMDH9vF
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“…So much for this,” Karin murmurs to herself—and then she is on her feet again, her inner eye tracing his every move.
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—melts.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWyB3orrHLT
“Cheer up, love. There will be many birthdays left for us to celebrate together.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3k4COTGyC
“… You promise?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMjeztV0t6
Her gaze softens.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDEyGEcrysR
“I promise.”
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At seventeen, Karin kisses him.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9RaYLtC66
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She impulsively crashes her lips against his, her arms thrown around his neck in a desperate attempt to hold onto him—to anchor him down before his essence could have the chance to fade into pitch black darkness again, to feel him before he could have the chance to waste his life—her life, their future—chasing phantoms all the way to the death.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6V9TGn8Rt
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When the impromptu kiss ends, Karin sees him—the him she knows, the him she loves—flickering across his eyes for the briefest of moments, and she hears her name resounding in her ears even though he has not uttered a single sound.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeuoKnAJPGm
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She smiles ruefully; trembling eyes boring into his—and then wordlessly lets him go.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18XRw4vJ0o
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She has given him a reason, but the choice is his to make.
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“Ha, so it was about a boy, I knew it!”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtH1B5d8u2j
“Shh, mama! I don’t want papa to hear! And… it’s not like I’m ever going to see him again, anyway….”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkmrEJjW31
Her mother has to hide her smile, “Actually, Karin… something tells me you just might.”
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At eighteen, Sasuke kisses her back.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJhyQ860LQ
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It is not nearly as passionate as her—their—first kiss had been; there is no desperation, no adrenaline—but there is craving all the same, waving through the serenity threading over her through the gentle pressure of his fingertips over the nape of her neck, enveloping her like a makeshift cloak and warming her down to her very core.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRGkDTE8WDg
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And Karin feels her very essence quiver under it—under the warmth and the way her heart seemed to want to leave her and jump into him instead, to claim the home it has always longed for; the home it has always fought for.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHSU1UguwsF
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The home it belonged to.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv2lbqaETx3
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As he kisses her, sunrays clumsily dancing upon her lips, Karin feels like she would vaporize into him if Sasuke were to take a single breath.
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“How do you know?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOiJHQRdrB
“Because, that’s how fate works, Karin.”
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At nineteen, Karin smiles.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRFSLlkRcP
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“Itachi,” she says, and Sasuke looks up to her, startled. “The name… Itachi. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5nXn9spz37
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Sasuke parts his lips—once, twice—but no sound comes out and soon enough he gives up altogether, lowering his eyes to stare at the bundle in his arms. It stares back at him, impossibly red eyes widened with innocent curiosity, pink tongue sticking out from underneath rosy lips.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrAmFAvQYk
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“Are you sure, Karin?” he whispers after what seemed like an eternity, and Karin’s smile only widens.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehKhh4n5ho
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“Yeah.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HZPfMfn0F
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And as she sees them—as she sees Sasuke hold their baby as if he were holding the whole, wide world in the crook of his arms—Karin remembers her mother with such vivid clarity that she catches a breath of her perfume. The memory—the vision is bittersweet, and it makes Karin’s throat clog, because she recognizes that look.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOX7Ms7HYzt
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It was the way her mother used to look at her father and her, eyes brimming with love and pride, unspoken but ever-present, never changing. Karin had not been able to understand it, then—518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLadv8xSOW
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But she did, now. And the understanding squeezed her heart in a way that was both, wonderful and terrible. To think it took her this long to finally understand, once and for all, what it all meant.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkoKWqEhF1z
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To understand who her mother truly was, what her mother felt, what her mother desired for her—and how her mother hurt.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1KBXRunRF
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You’re special, Karin. She would tell her sometimes, her eyes half-lidded and afflicted by thoughts she would never get the chance to say aloud. One day, you will realize that.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpkEaT0kwD
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She realized it, now; what it meant to love to her roots, what it meant to be a woman.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8WjFXuOMIE
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An Uzumaki woman.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp6Ylygjdbb
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“… Thank you, Karin.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm69dt7ila9
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“Idiot,” she shakes her head, weakly, traitorous tears prickling at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill. “That... should be my line.”
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“They will be here soon,”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRDUvSipakf
“Who will be here soon, mama?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0ic7ezRIo
“It could be anyone,” she finally replies, and her hold is steady as she combs through Karin’s hair, “we have long since lost any care for their identities, Karin. What matters is… what their presence means.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSiDnypOiSr
“And what is that?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahJgYqjN98
Her silence provides the only answer; and Karin wishes it weren’t enough.
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At twenty, Karin celebrates her birthday for the first time in seven years.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWTMp8Z52Y
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And it starts with a soft but firm admittance whispered as she caresses the baby’s nose, all too aware of the pleasant weight of Sasuke’s gaze, of the feelings swirling in his chakra.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx0M3CIdKv8
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Hearing them is unexpected, however—and her widened eyes snap to his only to find his lips beginning to curve, his own hand coming to caress her cheek in much the same way she was doing to their son.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ01mtmQ6Vh5
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“W—what was that about?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4TpL7cZRI
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She asks; some habits are hard to break, and her awkward way of fighting down her embarrassment seemed to be as persistent as ever.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kXS4VVxRP
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Sasuke doesn’t seem to mind, though. If anything, his smile seems to morph into an amused smirk as he shrugs, noncommittally. “I just felt like saying it, is all.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5YdrSbzp5
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“Dumbass,” she mutters, hoping the darkness will hide the way her cheeks have warmed up like bonfires, so reminiscent of her prepubescent days when all she could do was a dream she would one day lay with Sasuke the way she does now. “...You didn't need to.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzMv3Fvlxbz
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“I know, Karin,” and this time he is positively smiling, suddenly mutating back into the Sasuke that had stolen her heart so many years ago. “But it still felt good to say it.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXlFaMX77O
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Karin says nothing in response; simply snuggles closer to him, eyes on the baby as he opens his eyes and blinks, his little hands curling and uncurling up into the air.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WpXHdV8Io
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“He is going to be strong,” Sasuke assesses, and Karin would have mocked him by how ridiculous it was that he sounds that proud of Itachi when the baby hasn’t even said his first word yet, weren’t it because she felt the same way.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7nH5WasIXn
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He was going to be strong. A little piece of herself and Sasuke—a memento of those who had given their life up for them; a torch for those who had granted them the chance to live this moment.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9Xg12BOHV
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To live this happiness.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIEotMpiBz
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“Happy birthday, Itachi,” she whispers, and squeezes Sasuke’s hand. “I love you.”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTu5u9TNoQ
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The words feel dusty, and unknown—but familiar.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgcA1E0R7cP
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She knew them, once.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡREdmM6gwCD
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She has known them all along.
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I'm sorry, Karin.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaIhwx13zw
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Were the last words her mother told her before her father ushered her out of the house and prompted her to run—run as far as she could, away from them—and forced her to leave them to die.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8WU6d5wj6Z
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To survive.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1i40DlseF
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Those words used to hunt Karin down in those nights when sleep refused to lend her its hand, the eerie walls of Orochimaru’s hideout caving in on her and Sasuke’s steady chakra being her only relief, her only shield.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0jkjvq35zn
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Yet, what haunted her weren’t the words themselves, but their meaning; Karin had instinctively known then, just as clear as she knows now, that her mother was not apologizing for forcing her to forsake them and live on.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgZSW1eWBC
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No, that was not it—that was not the kind of woman her mother had been.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbtZdlD991
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Instead, she had apologized for something else entirely.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFaZthiECQ
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For the unsaid.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ77zpBv5Bc7
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“What are you thinking about, Karin?”518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1QD9xSugW
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Her lips curl upward as he takes the seat by her side, repentances fading away into the evening sky.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOLcUw5BDwc
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“Nothing,” she replies, threading her fingers through his and gazing back to their children, who were laughing and running together through the backyard, a lively mixture of reds and blacks; the Uchiha and Uzumaki crests proudly etched on their backs, on their hearts.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwO3o8XmC8H
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“Nothing at all.”
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"You will be fine."518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsKYFWrcAm
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And through the tears and the pain and the loneliness and the longing and the hardships and the fear, Karin should have known better.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIZ65zSfWDN
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Her mother was always right.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNUm8ONZgf8
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end.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqqccUpDoU
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I... seriously don't know where all this came from; my best guess: Uzumaki feelings. Uzumaki feelings everywhere. lol, I tried to play with the different facets of Karin, and how she grows into each one of them; plus SK, of course.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSPCouK4xR0
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The stuff I wrote here is not quite how I see things going, though; to do that I would have had to write about 395749574 vignettes per year, rather than only one lol so I went for rushed versions of a couple of scenarios I had thought about.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdS1jvTZHGZ
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Oh and while I did not state it in the fic: every vignette takes place on Karin's birthday, so the baby was born on June 20, too.518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMNEG2rAPp
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Anyway, hopefully, it wasn't that terrible! ♥518Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7z8SlA3OD
tags: fanfic, karin, naruto, sasukarin, sasuke
i'm : 
cheerful
listening to: never let me go - florence + the machine
ns216.73.217.5da2
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