《為閣下而設的精神煉獄》 - 第1.1章 - 脫離理性的束縛 - EP 8 Que Sera sera

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Que sera sera (法文)

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Whatever will be , will be

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將會發生的，將會發生

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2218/9/6

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佐島一茂

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「該死」

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「咳哈啊⋯呀⋯⋯咳啊！」

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眼球還沾著的樣子，因為身上沒有水源，只可維持這樣子，越眨眼，灼燒的感覺越為盛上

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合眼張眼，早已弄到眼皮背後上，致淚水不斷彷如過敏反應，連眼角亦紅腫像裂痛，估計無疑吧

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喉嚨也有同樣的痛覺，甚至胸膛之中

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「嘔⋯咳⋯嗚⋯⋯咳呀」

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似乎有點跑了去胃的樣子，始終無色的氣體並不能在這灘糊狀中分辨，倒數是胃酸倒流的感覺覆蓋了前者，稍微能支撐的程度

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站一旁，吐著口水，嘗試將痛感通通吐出來

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「⋯⋯咳⋯」

「噁⋯咳⋯」

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不過大概火燒的感覺才沒有那麼快去掉

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大概

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由石縫中爬出此處，迎接此處的昏暗，痛感仍然存在

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全彩至純黑白，空間不算很闊，牆壁和地面同時在視野中可到，只是天花板，似乎沒有那般存在

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緩緩靠往牆邊，逐步次步前進

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自己夜視的能力並非很強，是稍不至於夜盲程度，有景像的範圍也大概兩、三米

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當然也好過摸黑前進

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前進約數十米，時間不長，頂多三、四分鐘，到達一個終於可見到頂的地方，而牆壁反而不見

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是個矮樓頂的闊房間吧，多半

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於原地輕呼氣，提醒自己現時的首要目標

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探索著此空間

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「宿舍區⋯嗎？」

「⋯⋯」

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憑什麼

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2218/9/5 -神隱島//KDUL基地遺址//G20層-A區物資站

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也許是受傷的關係，男子的走路姿勢活像喪屍，拐著拐著，左瓦礫堆右玻璃碎，樓頂更是塌了下來的樣子，受微弱的緊急照明燈引領，走在不時佈滿裂痕的水泥地，向唯一的道路走

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在如此末日般的情境，少年臉上閃過見鬼的樣子，具體來說，眉頭一皺，發現事情並不簡單⋯才沒有

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似曾相識的感覺而已

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被困的窒息

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姓為佐島名為一茂，男子他的雙眼此刻顯得無神，如同忘了自我的樣子，卻認真一看，原來只是把當下的自己放空，所以軀體內的，是曾經的感受，但怎會揮之不去的模樣呢？

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『哥⋯⋯哥⋯⋯』

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『好⋯⋯冷喔⋯⋯』

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伴隨涼風，乘其接來的，是熟悉的味道，就在道路盡頭的方向，位於不遠處，奄奄一息的生氣

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步向其方向，感官越為強烈，逐漸地，好像看到了散發其的主人

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⋯

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肉體中混合機件的是人形，但從其流出的味道倒是一樣，然而導致這，亦可能是壓在其身上的⋯

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冰箱

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「⋯」

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—— 嘖嚼 ——

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『對不起』

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『對不起』

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「⋯？」

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由瓦礫堆傳出的聲音，比起任何正發出的聲音更響，抹走殘渣，即時走近

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只見一個身影正倒在碎石堆

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「鈴木⋯？」

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「花子！」

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少女的氣息，與記憶中的她同樣

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「花子！沒事吧？」

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男子的聲線連呼吸亦在震抖，堪為急促

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『但老實說，已經好一會兒沒有見他這樣子，此等激動』

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女子想著，並非空閑，純粹大腦已經開始昏迷了

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已經支持不住

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「⋯嗚⋯⋯」

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「花子？花子！」

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男子跪了下來，扶起意識薄弱的對方

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「這傷口⋯什麼⋯該死的 —— 」

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意識卻已經晃晃盪盪地迷暈著

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不行了

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不行了

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不行了，閉上眼睛了

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⋯⋯

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要死了嗎？

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「醒了嗎？」

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「⋯⋯咳⋯呀⋯⋯」

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醒來後的第一感覺，是絕大的疲力，全身上下亦一一體驗強大的地心吸力中

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就連眼皮也是，好累，要睡覺，但

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但它不讓我睡

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它兩指輕壓在左右眼皮上，將不斷墮下的頂住

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即使淚水，那出於顫抖中的眼球，沾在其潤滑像水本身的指頭

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我想眨眼，但眼皮動不了

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視線再模糊，眼窩又再如何地溺水，但紫色的光源實在太為特出

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明明只是眼皮，眼球卻一同動不了

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我在盯著對方，儘管我不想，至少以目前狀態來說

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我是有病的那方，理所當然，然而這不是我的錯，對嗎⋯？

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我也不想有病，我也不想是宿主，我不想這樣子

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我討厭這樣的自己

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我不想

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我不希望

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我討厭

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尤其是那眼窩的壓迫感，在指頭的施力下無比辛苦，額頭一股閉塞感

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水感接觸表面的麻痺和刺痛，淚水不斷湧出來，沾在指頭，還有自己的臉上

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmNUu3aUZi

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直流至嘴角，咸味，想大叫也好，喉嚨彷彿不存在，使力的感覺是空洞

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唯一能做的，似乎為單純感受這折磨，無數釘子刺著的感覺，再更為使力，像要進入自身瞳孔中

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它進入了

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從單純的刺痛感燃升為灼燒，卻眼窩本身是冷的，身體各部份又個別不同，忽冷忽熱

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額頭的壓迫感演變成完全的閉塞，頭開始暈，空氣、氧氣開始進入不到鼻腔內

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但貌似，有些什麼更大的，正從脊上攀爬著，嘗試進入腦袋內

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「為什麼要放棄呢？」

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「咳啊？！」

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「鈴木，你動搖了」

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聲音是從兩側耳直入，它在自己耳旁輕語，沒法子回神

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畢竟痛感繼續是激烈，還是眨眼不能，但只知意識不能與身體的感官同步

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越是嘗試保持清醒，抵抗痛感，嘗試去看去聽，意識越是被那強烈的干預牽引出身體，意識脫離本體而出

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身體如同被切開的感覺

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不行

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我要⋯

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我要⋯⋯不好了

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「嘔吐！咳咕！」

「咕嘔嚕——咿唔嘔！」

「⋯哈咳⋯咳⋯」

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喉嚨好痛⋯

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「⋯好點嗎？」

「來⋯⋯喝到水嗎？」

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聲音，很正常，視覺模糊但回來了，沒有了剛才的烈痛，好歹能真正感受到那處在痛，而非一股窒息的密集

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盛著淚看自己的手在抖，冷嗎？有點

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但比起之更是疲力和痛

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接過杯子，但對方沒有放手，扶著自己的手，托著

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雖說杯子是塑膠，但從未發覺塑膠也能如此重

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放在唇邊，輕輕一口接一口

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但口腔實在是太苦澀，叫自己喝著的時候也在發痛，打算就此吞下去便可以，倒是遲遲未能喝下的前提，那缺氧感使自己反胃而再吐了一次

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWlQ8nGNicJ

「⋯咳⋯咳！」

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此刻吐出了的是單純的水，卻見桶子內的不是透明，而是更為刺激眼球的

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「——咳！嘔⋯」

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「⋯可以嗎？」

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「⋯⋯唔⋯嗯⋯」

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再次吐入桶內，透明中稍有混濁，但被先前的紅光一一掩蓋

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將胃袋抽出了身體般，我忘了自己吐了多久、多少次，倒是痛與嗆感逐漸式微

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQMt57yoOt

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直至上胸的空囊感出現

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「⋯⋯嗚⋯」

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見自己終於完事之後，把桶子移走後，他接著又嘗試給自己水，望自己輕嚼一口又好，稍微灌些許水進食道，沖洗一下刺痛，卻那兒早已遭酸性漆滿了

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算了，又不是不痛

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「咕⋯嚕⋯⋯咕⋯嚕」

「⋯⋯哈⋯」

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頭重腳輕

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「別亂動，你的腿傷還未好」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQjCa3pdPd

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靠在後方的牆上面，托著額髮去抹去之上的水珠，冷汗的汗珠總是莫名地奇多

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「咳啊⋯」

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喉嚨有股黏凝，不像是什麼痰，微微不經意時稍刺一痛的感覺，反是像出血，有傷口的感覺

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精神還是浮浮沉沉的感覺

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畢竟全身的力量都歸於腿部了，一大傷口上

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⋯⋯

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「⋯休息一下吧」

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在微弱的燈光下，若隱若現的他，他的臉上依舊露出表情，沒有

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「⋯」

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房間很狹窄，就如⋯就如自己在那什麼醫院區那兒時的房間一樣

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正方，混凝土結構，橫放的光氣投射機

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykxJISU9jU

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「⋯⋯」

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大和

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我不明白

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「⋯⋯我先去找一下有沒有路——」

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是什麼原因

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「我說」

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到底是怎麼樣子的原因

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才使她成為這樣子

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「⋯」

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「花⋯鈴木，怎麼了⋯？放心，我不是放著你不管——」

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是什麼？

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為什麼大家都這麼的無憂無慮無自覺

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難道看不見嗎？

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「我説」

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「為什麼要置之我於不理？」

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頭髮轉成深綠，凝重而彩系的濃欖綠

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——————

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順從

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使人

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屈服

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——————

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tdkwp1Rx8

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyImEmUh50q

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深綠，濃厚且不自然的黑欖綠

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眼線因為瞪大之雙眼，輕微而顯眼地延伸了出去

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淚腺稍脹，但比較注目的，是由黑轉紅，又輕淡而逐漸綠的瞳孔和眼白

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她的呼吸緩慢了，亦可能單方面自身的感覺，但仰視此方的，是一對不止鋭利的眼神，極為不友善

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她在仇視自己

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「為什麼要這樣」

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「⋯你說什麼」

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因為一個原因

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她希望我能幫她

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但我沒有

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「為什麼你沒有用對良世的方法，來幫我」

「為什麼？」

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她希望我能為她站出來

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在她最需要自己的時候

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「你說為什麼？」

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「因為⋯因為你記得？」

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「⋯⋯難道⋯難道就是因為⋯⋯」

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「當年的我沒有等你？」

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「拜托⋯回答一下我⋯」

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「⋯恕我拒絕」

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我不能

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「⋯⋯我」

「我不想討論那件事情」

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聲音在顫抖

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「你從來⋯沒有打算⋯⋯和我說任何事情」

「我曾經⋯以為你是我的朋友」

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「⋯⋯」

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「但⋯你⋯⋯到最後還是⋯決定默聲⋯⋯不發⋯⋯呢」

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「⋯⋯」

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「⋯」

「⋯我⋯我明白了」

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「⋯⋯」

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一如既往，我沒有出聲，我選擇不去發聲

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「⋯」

「你先走吧」

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她將頭裁入兩手肘以大腿之上，那個細小的空間

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「⋯我會跟上的⋯⋯待會」

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聲音因為一層障隔而稍模糊起來

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「⋯⋯」

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凝視著她，連腳步也僵硬的狀態

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反正事實不只一層隔模

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我亦靠近不了

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「⋯」

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「⋯⋯我說」

「⋯我想⋯⋯自己一個人⋯⋯靜靜」

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⋯⋯

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反正

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我早已放棄

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5f4purygft

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JalAm6Seq

再往會偏離已定的方向，掙扎了

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鈴木，你會明白嗎？

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————————————

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCLyIviXN7

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwY5BvLSAE

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKqIzRyLIit

不溝通是最好的理論上溝通方式

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不溝通是最好的理論上溝通方式

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpg4LeHpFwy

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8z4oJsCPJ

————————————

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2218/9/6

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鹿波依奈子

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大和英花

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————————————

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「大和⋯」

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「我已經走不動了」

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比起倦意，無生氣的聲音貌乎出於困擾，依奈子的表情回復原狀

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果然，她一開始那呆然的笑容並不能持續多久，就如流星的出現，逐漸消退得尾巴也看不到，看得來時又已經察覺太遲，早該和之率直

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應該一早在依奈子未開口時便發現

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但現時與她的距離越來越遠⋯

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFlgpQgccs

別說現在自己的模樣連自己也害怕，也知道自身氣息的裏頭混入了不少的他物，好比這股擾攘繞人頸下的陰暗感，單是感受著就令舌頭乾燥，手腳束抖，鼻腔騷動不安

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRxRVTjKt0

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEGnUpP7Wn

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2zQRCBD4z

「嗯」

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「⋯嗯」

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聲音震如息止，能發出的最後一聲

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屏息是一秒，閉塞的是左右眼睛內側

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4nuDKk7Tka

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdS2Z7qfDtY

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ZMGZqTMtY

「鹿波——」

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「大和⋯大和⋯⋯」

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不算什麼突如其來，始終剛剛的，便是現在衍生至這樣子的訊號

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuR2LKib7jN

依奈子那從上流下的大珠，劃過臉頰津紅，在那一抖一抖的下巴，聚成水滴落下

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她在努力地張開眼睛，但從神情，淚光佈滿半張臉，很微小而緊密的顫抖，以及看著也感覺痛的幅度，咬住自己的下唇，斷斷不絕的泣號還是繼續溢斥出口

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGtK1IEU1M

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynqQvLM0sM

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjSwWi35iY

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少女就在原地，顫抖著身體而哭泣著

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撇除其他，她是個和我一樣的女孩，也是一種人，宿主

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同樣，經歷這種不明的不安

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZ09cpo7sM

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLGb37i5yF

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyL8Ao2EDk

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY1QuewtjtX

「對⋯對不起⋯我⋯也不知道⋯人家⋯⋯為什麼⋯嗚⋯⋯」

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「⋯嗚咽⋯我⋯我⋯對不⋯⋯嗯⋯」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKVnQjj1jy

握緊拳頭，手背的指筋無比的明確，表現、感覺上弱小的軀體，內在的織熱卻是可以感受到的程度

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「嗚咽⋯嗚⋯⋯」

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「⋯鹿波」

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「為什麼？！」

「為什麼一定要是我？！」

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「為⋯為什麼我總要經歷這種種的壓力？！」

「我不要！才不要！」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8pabzfGyJw

「可不可以⋯可不可以⋯⋯放過我⋯⋯放過我可以嗎？」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0dkW4C1fg

「我受夠了⋯⋯」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP3eIEJsTY6

「我⋯人家只是想回家⋯我不要這樣子⋯嗚」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhikVz1JPN

「拜託⋯結束吧⋯嗚⋯⋯嗚⋯好辛苦⋯」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2rMYDlFh1

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFUAZft1EB

「⋯⋯嗚⋯」

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不難辨識，依奈子正處在崩潰的狀態中

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「⋯⋯大和⋯」

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「我⋯我該怎麼辦？」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtbcX3VHSX

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNAqwXtlVnx

仍然在顫抖

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「鹿波⋯」

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「⋯」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTZaWiP9iZ

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ24gavIHmXo

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC0wAB6sauO

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9D4Ua0knrA

「放心吧，沒事的，一定」

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「我們一定會平安活出去的」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8xI1mUzTO

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡISFyqDwhg9

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCiMyeBH2uF

「⋯⋯憑⋯什麼？」

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「憑什麼⋯⋯？」

「⋯當然⋯⋯」

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「這是我向你保證的」

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「你接受嗎？」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjabq42JDH

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHiTm1yAtXD

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw2T7kgj6a6

再度降低蛇身，我靠近

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「⋯⋯」

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將少女的身體包裹在懷中，變異的身體明顯地有所不同的感觸感，倒是硬化的皮膚仍然能感受到溫暖的存在，且格外地，熾心

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8oCZqPKHzo

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjB3CFZimsS

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8JwzZF6aib

將頭栽進自身懷中，然後張開手，摟抱

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依奈子抱住我的肚子，把臉栽入自己懷裏

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWobJI4vqi

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGkVP5W9uKB

呼吸比較上平坦、穩定

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmWeSbqtugB

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRbovLAch5

仍然急促

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「⋯嗎？」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHChVohHSfg

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzGzjBhRWkw

「嗯，我保證」

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「一起逃出去，平安無事地出去」

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「無論如何，我會保護你的，所以說」

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「怎樣？」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7oHIkFohze

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvHH1bpLUGE

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriA56uJ8e7

「⋯怎樣⋯⋯」

「人家才搞不清楚⋯」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTT1uk42rmW

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTMshyJQlu

感受到言語中少許騷動，胸懷內稍微冷冰，卻只是比較起本身的熾炎才是這樣子，本身，一滴兩滴的每一滴也是納悶的濕淋

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSIgQFSAQ0T

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YIVg2WHxl

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ueN83ACzL

呼吸仍然急促

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「我討厭這樣子」

「我討厭各種的不明不白」

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「好像⋯彷彿一切都不合理」

「突如其來」

「斯而使人受傷」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTPPHr9ZMM

「我討厭」

「我好怕」

「我好害怕啊⋯」

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「⋯⋯」

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輕撫那直順的黑長髮絲，接著六手共同抱住

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPFcm86h3td

但始終感受到的，只有一等一的安心

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然而，足夠了

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對我而言，對她而言，對我們而言⋯卻⋯沒有什麼但是⋯⋯

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJt0HQGXZg0

安心本身就是不需要解釋

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「⋯」

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「不用說下去」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTitxI2l2od

「沒關係的」

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「⋯但無論如何，我們一定可以離開這裏」

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyqZ6t54J0g

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4DNpKJNtnh

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBF3LoTtKK

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRpJTvCTfWY

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtNafEQIiB

「⋯⋯」

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「我也希望⋯」

「但——」

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「夠了，這樣便夠了⋯」

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「⋯⋯大⋯和⋯⋯」

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「沒事的」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqtlbhye56

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAonH3WrMr5

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlMRZeArfi

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKaXh5f5iyF

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVxdZv5Mc9

「一定」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWwMTeHMq61

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi3bNteIhpH

——————

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Que sera sera (法文)

Whatever will be , will be

將會發生的，將會發生

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTF2PPhwoRh

Que Sera sera

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反正因為平凡，存在平凡，活得平凡、感得平凡、生得平凡，死得平凡

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平凡年代

平凡淡趣

平凡無奇

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平凡

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您根本沒有選擇權

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只要「平穩」就好了

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好了

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHiUTva37Mw

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夠了

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——————

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——————

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWG62Q6ED0

抱頭鼠竄跪地痛哭而選擇了

「生存下去」

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這裏可是「樂園」呢

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Que Sera sera

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存在的價值和紅化的生命單純為

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因果定因果論

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從服、無本性，罪惡是扎根於本性

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就這樣為保留僅存的理性而

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哀苦吧哀愁惱吧

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Que sera sera

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIOpAgvStVn

——————

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdngUQgcXV

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxRsoHrmBi

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4bFWwR7Me

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「不知道⋯依奈子她⋯⋯」

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「放心吧，沒事的」

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怎看也好，兩人也是同一個樣子，和鹿波一個樣無誤⋯但又有⋯完全不一的氣息

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不懂怎樣形容⋯⋯

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總之不同⋯就是了

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無所謂了

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新世在前面走著

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自己在後面

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兩個鹿波伴在旁

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一路以來沒什麼異樣，感覺才是最大的異樣⋯嘛

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的說

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是沒什麼關係的説

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但就⋯總之

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總之事情儘快結束就最好呢⋯然後

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然後繼續戴著頸項環，和隻動物一樣，過作為宿主的日子

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如斯幻想多麼的不健康呢(笑⋯)

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⋯⋯

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沒差多少

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⋯我反正不值得擁有正常的日子

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人家可是現行犯⋯對鹿波⋯⋯預備去⋯

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禽獸！

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「⋯喂喂，怎了？別發呆啦」

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「抱歉⋯對不起⋯」

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「你兇到別人家了」

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「抱歉啦，我——」

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「沒關係」

「不用放在心上」

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視線交接，可還是放棄吧，不在曾有那念頭之後

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好歹當作尊重一下對方吶⋯

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「⋯嗯」

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「吶吶！」

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一概地天真無邪的聲音，良世正引著大家注意

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「這個⋯好像是出口喔！」

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指著前方開啟了的大閘，女孩笑著嚷道

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「A點撒離區⋯不知道能不能到外面去呢⋯」

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抬頭，女性望著上方的橫標

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「喂，那個⋯那麼依奈子⋯⋯這樣⋯真的可以嗎？」

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「以個人意見，先處理好自己再去顧及他人吧」

「仔細想，這種地方本身太多不定因素了」

「先確保自己安全吧」

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「⋯嗯」

「先離開的話更好吧⋯吶？」

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「那麼就⋯」

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話語的尾音是往上勾的未完成式，其視線彷似剛由另一個次元看回來

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「很像依奈子的姐姐，一起走吧！」

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「嗯」

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依舊是引人注意的她

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有股莫名的憂傷

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還是，那只是我？

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沒所謂了

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又有什麼關係

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貓耳朵有點癢⋯的說

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「⋯呼⋯⋯」

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趕快離開這惡境吧——

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「不要過來！」

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這聲音是——

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「快點 —— 嗚咳 —— 啊！！」

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可能是本來還是鬆戒著，並沒有看清楚剛剛的畫面，只知道當金髪的倒地，以極不尋常的姿勢，橫向仆倒而前，跌到

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頓時心臓立馬知道危機的存在

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視線直盯前方，落在金髮的頭上，同樣落在其頭上的，是一根透黑，不，是墨綠，如角似的插在其頭側，只是

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那才不是角

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「⋯呼⋯我説⋯就從⋯最小的開始動手吧⋯」

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是高跟鞋的跟，其主人，是那個鈴木

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宿主化的她

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「新世！」

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我無法理解自己的行為，但沒差吧

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感到心跳不是加速，反而緩慢起來，但每下愈來愈強勁，心跳震至胸膛抖動、眼睛晃動，輕微的電流感閃過，全身上下，從來不知道其真正的路程，儘管知道是一個接一個，但其速度快至一瞬的程度

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耳朵站立起來

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眼睛滾至直前

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指頭、手指、手臂初發痛，然又緊崩，叫人想發洩

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大腿、小腿、腳跟，似被刺扎而屈了起來，每部分肌肉稍作曲折，只有腳趾部分仍碰著地

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我清楚，這是貓科的攻擊動作

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直覺，距離四米

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為什麼？我可應該逃跑呢，又不是沒有經歷——

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「啊⋯」

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翠綠的顏色不是在發光，只是單單叫人注目討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己——

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

我⋯我為什麼要站出來？討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

因為自己對新世的看法是「自己的獵物」，衍生的獨佔欲？還是其他？討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

⋯ 討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

我才不曉得討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

就因為聽到她即將被傷害？討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

別開玩笑了討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

我？正義感？可不存在討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

⋯⋯ 討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

隨便啦討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己討厭自身吧，禽獸，就此吧，結束，放棄自己

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEP3GFt2CnE

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMT4LVAxadx

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3wtAOm1y4

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「吼！」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBVH3rsokWV

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出於肺喉原始的聲吼響動，為我對其的回覆

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回神過來，已經在大閘的前方，使力撥拳，擊開空氣，但我知道她那塑膠的皮膚沒離自己那拳多遠

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「⋯同樣的招數⋯不奏效了嗎？」

「貓咪⋯真是可愛呢⋯」

「抱歉啦，原諒我可沒空想出新招來使你乖巧」

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聲音很微弱，如夢話一樣

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「快點跑！」

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呵呵，我是在裝什麼呢⋯

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以我的能力阻止不了她

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人家頂多只能拖延

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沒關係了，反正於此處，不明不白，毫無原因的一切，已經是常態，顛覆概有的「正常」、「常識」

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我不需要為自己的想法尋找原因

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「我待會兒再回來和你玩呢⋯」

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向腳下的輕語，她抬回頭，看過來，輕輕一笑

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笑得人心發寒

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—— 啪 ——

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—— 咯 ——

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「啊！！！」

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使力向下踩，雖則鞋跟沒有斷，但剛剛那奇怪的清脆聲音以及那撕肺裂喉的慘叫代表的，恐怕是指有其他東西斷開了

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「咕⋯」

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躍起，跑近

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來了

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「⋯貓咪⋯我才沒空和你玩遊戲」

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什麼——

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剛剛才在自己前方，但又突然消失在眼前，聲音卻在右方——

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啊

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她不是消失了，她

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她縮小了

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在自己肩上跨過

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「你——」

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—— 碰 ——

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhl9WVl5k8A

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背脊一之前，的是兩眼一黑，伴隨額頭的破皮

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只見正常身形的她正繼續衝往其等人

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是改變身形的能力？

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「吼⋯咕」

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「吼！」

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彈跳向前，手碰地，後空翻而追上距離

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「啊！」

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良世的聲音

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不能

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「給我放開她的手」

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空中揮拳，雙拳直下，然而所感到的只有空氣的質感，不難怪，貓眼所見到的，是正在縮小的她

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她閃避了一擊

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如我所願

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—— 碰揭 ——

—— 咯 ——

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBkvCudwhW

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順以前空翻的慣力，以及重量，使勁力雙腳直下，儘管貓科動物的手足有軟勢所在，但我，是人

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是宿主而已

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uwWDMuFsF

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyMwWUHs5ic

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充血而硬化的腳板，使力搯下地面

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxUvKLwky5

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTbQtGuRfQ

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQhL235nWnt

稍有破裂且陷入，果倒她站不穩

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdNDAWaoqdY

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yfCWMBDBu

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ikhhqiaP4

現只有書本大小的她向後跌，和自己的腳尖形成直線

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稍斜腳跟，抄踢起

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—— 碰 ——

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我沒有控制自己的力量，即使有可能這下子會要了對方的命，我不知道，人家才不管了，沒有起殺意亦好，此股強烈不已的激鬥使自己控制不了

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「賀羽姐姐！」

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「噫？！」

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—— 碰 ——

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「—— 呀？！！」

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好痛！

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震至頭骨，一陣突如其來的衝擊從腦後勺直接襲來，叫眼前一黑，險些昏倒，身體油然前傾，在落地前一瞬轉身，藉背向地

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「⋯什麼——嗚！」

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—— 碰 ——

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身形大了一倍多，目測三米有多，話不定過四米，一腳踏下來的那刻若不避開，自身的上身即成肉醬，粉身碎骨

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不是誇張，但我旁邊的地板是完全陷裂的程度

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不是我起了殺意

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是她

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—— 咻 ——

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過來了！

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鞋足的橫移，看來是想以其人之道還治其人之身，但速度上——

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稍有優勢而已

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跳至其腳面

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—— 碰 ——

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAnDc7Mk0dZ

「嗚哈啊？！！」

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脊椎的末端傳來最激烈的刺感，如有至上額量的電流通過全身，好痛，痛得要吐出來了，怎麼搞的，我可不是避開了嗎？！受傷的那是——

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那是⋯

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尾巴

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感覺到血管的擴洞感，尾巴的重量多了，腫刺的，像內出血、斷了，不過更致命的是，我失平衡了

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7ju3Co0kd

「嗚吼！」

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鋒利的指甲抓著其絲襪，後空翻，繞大腿而上，跳上去——

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdvSnTYn7Fk

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQzMy7XTg7

「滾開」

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揮來，大手打走了我

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是嗎？

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是連碰也沒碰到，直接牽連的強風吹到失衡

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL25fZ2bits

這樣子的說

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尾巴紅腫得不得了，痛楚其後的倦意，繼續活動時的腫痛，互相循環，失血的冷刺一直在尾椎襲上來，扯著腦髓，要扯過來，把力量，吸過去的虛弱感

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不行，好痛，不行，超痛

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不能

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRL8lsiypib

不可以任由這傢伙

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdNZ4Nz0yfE

既然手腳如此發達也不足於重傷，那只能使上再為厚硬難折、發達無窮的攻擊

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxP67AZW2Br

「吼喔」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlZ3otD97j

「啊？！」

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使上最強勁的肌肉，身體最堅硬的地方，密集而強力的突攻，分出勝負的一下子

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獵者、獵物

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往最脆弱而又最大面積的要害

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咬下去

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8OPrvWbpv

「吼喔！！！」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPeFmKGvJsa

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVCsI4E0ULo

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8slupDaWg

犬齒確實地穿插了入去，門牙亦感受到物質的切裂，智齒則是好好地做好了其工作，粉碎

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ93ZYOaC0Rd

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCN8yldLZia

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0FkBDVsIet

塑膠的硬質無味很快就被熟悉而染鼻的濃甘蓋過，看來儘管是人形公仔的外貌，但本身作為人類的真相，從來改變

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肉的口感，血的味覺，越是咬下去，就越來勁，整個腦海入面也是那刺激的鮮味，甚至連疲意亦不能襲上來

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保持理性之野獸的味覺

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我沒有停下來，卻傷口越來越小，不，是她的身體比例在縮小，傷口則愈為有深度

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrtR7o9n060

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Q5ejuQ13x

她在掙扎，從那早已染滿銅臭的肩膀上，想拉自己下來，卻回復正常身形大小比例的她，只不過成為了自己的獵物，絕妥正名的狀態

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBh8so0LyLS

「嗚啊！」

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpnX59mpjf9

有這麼的一下子，就一下子，大概因為宿主化的改變，還有腎上腺素的協助，以及自己口部肌肉在一段收縮之後的倦意關係，成功推開了自己的口，使這整套嚐血鋒牙利齒離開了傷口，我看見了那稍有喘息的表情，但沒有多久，再次咬下去

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IWb0OKlbO

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nUn7sOaVw

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSCb7oVPs9

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZwytc92kkn

啃咬下去

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnDyIv61xz

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7NETe047zm

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirEsLJNF4D

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahdMGS7K16

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBN9lYLjh5

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GTzTyRHsb

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRKPRzhxZ9

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS6WS3wfPnB

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dTbFD90ya

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrBbxoz3Kg

卻

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJPuzqvNYj

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnACOtk10P

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頓時有絲不定的鼓騷由胸膛發出，使自己切實的磨齒下去前停了下來

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEP58ZmvAqR

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前半秒知道不妥，下半秒隨即反應

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490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbUy8378JC

490Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡls6XvJ8l6F

鬆口，使拳揮向其臉，但因其鬆忪的那刻，身體之放鬆，平衡的不一致，自身的瞄向遺準，那拳擦過其背

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她趴了在原地

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自身亦因再度歸來的疲意，坐了在地上

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磨損了其衣服，傷口只是擦傷

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鼻子告訴自己，儘管眼看滿地紅也是出於面前的她，但空氣中的氣味，有另一股更為濃烈，不是和口中的一致，而是更為淡味而又局部腥鮮，不是臭味，單純的味道，如牛奶和奶油的比較，更普通嫩小味淡的前者，如小孩子的血

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小孩的血

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呀？

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「不過呢，似乎直接的催眠無效而已」

「『幻境』可還是無人能克服呢」

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眼睛，眼睛欺騙了我

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「——啊！」

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隨即得見真相而驚恐的人，並不只有我一人

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在稍遠處的，傳來的尖叫

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⋯⋯

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鈴木的傷口上，正放著一隻手，斷掉的手，白骨的裂縫尖鋭亦可納入視野內，如冰柱一樣，末端逐流而滴，血的流行是圍之而令其正面，留白，還有那少了一根指頭的手掌

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正正是唯一正解

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沿之紅池，川河，一直追尋至剛剛的聲音發出處

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「新世⋯你⋯⋯」

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看了只有一眼，頂多兩眼而不多於三，油然而生的恐懼卻烙印了

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硬生生的斷骨，骨頭和肌肉的移位，血流成河，成湖，堪至全個地板滲水似，本人亦以奄奄二息

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我們毫不察覺

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「你這混帳！」

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「你又能拿我怎樣？小貓咪」

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站起來，即使受了傷，仍然筆直並嘗試表現出那一概，而又病態至極的淑雅

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笑著，語道

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「接下來，可是你了呢」

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「反抗吧」

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「尖叫吧」

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「不過⋯

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Que sera , sera(要發生的，終究發生)」

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翠綠色，不自然的生命力

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