I know the feeling of heartbreak. It hurts. Trust me.
I could hear my own voice in my head as I sat in my chair oddly quietly. I know it was quite peculiar for me to be silent in a 'Do Not Laugh' video, but there was just something about today that I was completely unhappy. I thought a video with Ross, Barney, and Jin could make me smile.
Jokes were made, but it seemed every bit of my energy had been drained out of my body. I let out a few pity and fake laughs, it was obviously noted it didn't sound like a squawking bird. It went on for about fifteen minutes and I outro'd my video. Quite frankly, I didn't like it.
"Heh, anyway guys. Thank you so much for watching, uh, if you guys like this episode of "Do Not Laugh" make sure to slap that like button and subscribe if you already haven't already. Um, make sure to check out everyone's channel in the description below because they're all beautiful people. Anyway guys, we'll see you guys later. Bye..!"
I waved at the camera and stopped the recording. Regaining my thoughts, I sighed and pushed my glasses up further on the bridge of my nose. I took off my headphones and exited our Skype. I raked my fingers through my slightly curly, thick dark brown hair. I heard a knock outside my office door.
It was Ross.
I forced out a smile at him, looking up into his ocean blue eyes. Hy greenish brown eyes locking onto his figure.
"Hey Ross, whatchya' doin'?"
My southern slang was more on point. Ross's face was serious. He came in my office and was now standing in front of me. I could see a look of concern in his eyes.
(For any confused readers, this is an AU where Adam suffers from depression. Depression is NOT a joke, and should never be joked about guys just so you know. People suffer from this everyday, and I know because I deal with it personally. Enough rambling, here you go.)
"Adam, you know exactly why I'm in here."
I looked down at my feet.
"C'mon man, tell me why you're sad."
I didn't know how to break the awkward silence. I just sort of sighed and remained quiet. Twiddling my thumbs, I knew Ross wasn't gonna stand there forever until I talked, and I knew I wasn't going to be talking anytime soon.
I felt a warm hand on my cold shoulder.
"Adam, you can tell me. I promise I won't tell Barney, or Jin, or Cory, or any of the other guys, okay?"
I looked up at him, into the lovely blue eyes he owned.
Stop it Adam, he's your friend. Stop fantasizing, he doesn't have feelings for you. If so, it's only platonic.
I continued to be silent, but it only lasted moments.
Moments felt like hours in the silence.
I saw Adam part his lips. Then I heard his voice.
"I dunno man, things have just been...."
He trailed off. I wasn't going to question it, though I wanted to, I held my tongue.
"I understand, but hey, if you wanna, you can come over to my apartment and uh, play a game? I dunno, you can choose whatever you wanna do."
Dammit Ross! What are you trying to do?! Flirt?!?
I saw the corners of his mouth curl into a smile. My heart was pounding lightly in my chest, I heard it in my ears. Adam stood up after saving the clip on his camera and turning off his computer. He was slightly taller than me. But I noticed something.
There was tons of rubber bracelets on his wrists.
"Sounds good, I'm down for that."
My voice cracked as I choked out to say his name. I gently grasped his left wrist and pushed away a few of the bracelets. I wanted to hug him at the horror I saw. Cuts and scratches littered his pale forearm.
I let go of his wrist and sighed. Whether he liked it or not, I wrapped my scrawny arms around his semi-musculine body. My chest tightened when I felt his chin on my shoulder. He brought his hands up my back, accepting the embrace and hugging me back.
We soon parted but I didn't want the loss of his cold touch. We headed out of his office and Adam shut the door behind him. I turned and saw Barney right in my face.
"Ares yous two lovesbirds makin' out ins theres?"
My cheeks turned a light shade of pick as I had been startled.
"Oh hey Barney."
Adam was so chill about it, his adorable real smile was so much better than his fake smiles.
Goddammit Ross! Stop thinking about Adam like that!
I heard Barney chuckle and leave. Adam and I walked out of the building and got to my car. I got in the driver's seat while he got in the passenger side. We buckled in and I started the car. I eventually parked my car in the lot at my apartment.
He and I got out of the car and went to the apartment I stayed at.
"Why don't we play a horror game, Ross?"
Adam's voice cooed as we entered my humble living space. I balled my fists. He knew I didn't like horror.
He chuckled and next thing I knew, we were at the TV, sitting in front of an XBox 360 I owned.
I squeaked at a jumpscare and Adam jumped a little while I had almost pissed myself. Adam chuckled at my frail-like figure. I was now pressed against the side of his shoulder, trembling slightly and flushed with embarrassment.
It was getting late and I'm pretty sure Adam needed to get home. It was about 10 PM. We had been playing for hours and I was definitely tired.
"Hey Adam, it's late. I'm gonna call it a day.."
I heard no reply.ns 220.127.116.11da2