今天又來說「說話」。740Please respect copyright.PENANA8ZDKgBdyBq
從前說的普遍是理論性的,740Please respect copyright.PENANAF7NVn79fwX
走心法方向。740Please respect copyright.PENANAbLcLHf85oR
今天就來分享一式拳法。
「或者......」740Please respect copyright.PENANAc9Wqy0R96O
「不如......」
當你想表現得比較有禮貌時,740Please respect copyright.PENANAe8PfuABjsM
可能是跟陌生人開會,740Please respect copyright.PENANASo1dRnlVEg
或是擔任接待,740Please respect copyright.PENANAj35GbC1gLG
適當時候在句子前加上或者/不如,740Please respect copyright.PENANArHlTihoQJM
就可以給人一種會尊重別人的印象。
以阿德勒的看法,740Please respect copyright.PENANAzBqKN2MqtX
每個人都是自己世界的主人,740Please respect copyright.PENANALQB1GhUQTj
所以我們都很討厭別人擅自進入我們的世界還要指手劃腳。740Please respect copyright.PENANANtZG6Uv43e
奈何生活就是不斷的與他人的世界碰撞。740Please respect copyright.PENANAl52GGULB8J
甚麼是尊重?740Please respect copyright.PENANAoMWuZJC4WH
就是當我進入你的世界時,我懂得作客,不越權。
「或者」「不如」這一類帶遲疑、建議意味的字詞,740Please respect copyright.PENANAG0qlsgOjVo
就能暗暗傳遞出一種「我沒有要作主」的意思,740Please respect copyright.PENANAzwqzIaL5ge
所以聽見的人就沒有一種被入侵、被冒犯的感覺。740Please respect copyright.PENANAoOA61r5Vca
只要他本身沒甚麼意見,740Please respect copyright.PENANAw72kpCtd2U
大多數情況下都會跟隨你的「建議」而行。740Please respect copyright.PENANAscuVPN06Xy
不然,不管你「建議」的內容是甚麼,740Please respect copyright.PENANAC2tMiZn2cG
對方一感到被冒犯就可能會反抗。
這是我個人常用的招數,740Please respect copyright.PENANANDPgGXQcfO
不管是當7-11便利店員,740Please respect copyright.PENANAOXEkpr0CDA
或是大學跟人討論project的時候。
如果是想跟下屬拉近距離的上司們,740Please respect copyright.PENANACi2fImWQ3S
我也建議這樣做。740Please respect copyright.PENANADtQi87rU6h
傳統的上司總是一言堂,740Please respect copyright.PENANAGUxcC6cRsa
營造一種高高在上的印象方可控制下屬。740Please respect copyright.PENANA44hn8N2dzR
可現在社會改變了,740Please respect copyright.PENANAvCia1zAzuu
你是要只會按指令做事的機械,740Please respect copyright.PENANA4FGnHD9VH2
還是敢進諫的下屬?
當然,有一些不懂事的人可能會鬧事情。740Please respect copyright.PENANAbwbeBpnPq7
例如,你:「不如我們嘗試這個吧?」740Please respect copyright.PENANAunDmaxIaG8
他:「不要。」740Please respect copyright.PENANAej4nKEeu0t
反對不是問題,740Please respect copyright.PENANA8nWzBJYHDx
但沒有理由的反對就是任性,740Please respect copyright.PENANAFWN5hWu8bc
所以這時候不識大體的是他。740Please respect copyright.PENANAQyy3mfVmzn
如果你性格比較剛烈的,740Please respect copyright.PENANA8KD4oVeSYf
你可以跟他翻桌:「那你想怎樣嗎?說呀!」740Please respect copyright.PENANAPXsMZzR8GO
只是我個人不太建議這樣。
還有一種變種的用法,740Please respect copyright.PENANAH3OSvk3CPM
是跟朋友逗著玩時用的。740Please respect copyright.PENANA1hRf8sQwcK
「你去死啦!」說太多?740Please respect copyright.PENANAUWKRhidMre
你可以嘗試「不如,你去死啦,好嘛?」740Please respect copyright.PENANApLt7EPk03v
再配上一個廉價的微笑,一流!
但這些詞不是天生雪蓮,740Please respect copyright.PENANAq2iXMN6hSk
單用就可起死回生。740Please respect copyright.PENANAK7ioFTAp16
它有用的原因是它能把語氣從「命令」改成「建議」,740Please respect copyright.PENANAjD2uHjFeaE
所以如果你能掌握語氣的轉換,740Please respect copyright.PENANAEow7APvIw7
不靠這些詞你也能靠說話表達尊重。740Please respect copyright.PENANAATpmzL20Az
若果不能,你硬用這些詞也只是把語氣變得讓人難以捉摸。