劏房內,楠少殷切地招呼阿藍,為她奉上紙包檸檬茶。阿藍開懷地大口喝著,狀甚滿足。這是她最喜愛的飲品。儘管忘記了前塵往事,她的口味依然不變。715Please respect copyright.PENANAggFjBYQ6ke
715Please respect copyright.PENANAdC6AMhVYHc
小小的舉動,看在楠少眼內,竟是莫大的希望:只要阿藍的基本性格沒有變改,她就有重新愛上他的機會!715Please respect copyright.PENANALV6QPDZIFz
715Please respect copyright.PENANAJFmH7xki4H
楠少與阿藍並肩坐在上層床舖,講述昔日在此的相處點滴。阿藍驚訝自己曾是多麼開放的野蠻女生,會主動挑逗楠少;她高興自己在楠少眼中是如此體貼的女生,在盛夏時送他冰墊、在他缺錢時配合他的省錢大計、在他自暴自棄時不離不棄;她難以想像當初是自己主動追求楠少,原因還要是極其浪漫的「一見鍾情」……715Please respect copyright.PENANASrjoDdm8M1
715Please respect copyright.PENANASu9lCXQM0j
「對不起……我真的想不起來。」對於楠少眼中的濃濃愛意,阿藍感動亦無奈。715Please respect copyright.PENANAYG4tt6NDjb
715Please respect copyright.PENANAlJw1fcBiE4
「不要緊。」楠少報以苦澀一笑,安慰阿藍:「換個角度,失憶不就是一個『重新做人』的大好機會嗎?忘記往昔恩怨,重新認識你往曾經討厭的人,放下心理包袱,重新規劃將來的路向。」715Please respect copyright.PENANATnjLpsKFQC
715Please respect copyright.PENANAixapCCBSK0
「真的不要緊嗎?」阿藍聞言後竟更為激動:「我聽到很多關於我做過的事,發現那個曾經的『我』很陌生。」715Please respect copyright.PENANAZA3wszkoKN
715Please respect copyright.PENANAAELoZoGsLR
自出院那天起,阿藍努力嘗試找出舊日的點點滴滴。家人和長輩隱形似的,不留任何痕跡;朋友和同學留痕不多,同班的馨儀和祈祈較為投契,與她私下另有通訊群組的;楠少則是她生命中的絕大部份,無論合照、情信、電話訊息、群組通訊記錄,甚至乎同學、老師、阿藍媽、馨儀、光仔、志恆均異口同聲講起二人如膠似漆的甜蜜日子。715Please respect copyright.PENANA084AISopUe
715Please respect copyright.PENANA2JtdzQ3y3l
「在同一處境,現在的我根本不會做同樣的事。那個『我』或多或少受到過往經歷所影響,作出現在的我不會做的決定和行為。換言之,我未必會再次討厭我曾討厭的人,亦未必會再次愛上我曾愛上的人。」715Please respect copyright.PENANAa1oqFlZnQb
715Please respect copyright.PENANAze51AEyr2b
眾人的憶述、手裡的合照、楠少望她的愛慕眼神,一切均使阿藍對這個陌生的「愛人」越發在意。715Please respect copyright.PENANAz4p09fyEca
715Please respect copyright.PENANAttR3MLRhUt
她花上大量時間和心思了解楠少。715Please respect copyright.PENANABlYxhfEK2H
715Please respect copyright.PENANAnjGe0wfqSt
楠少本來是個單純的大孩子,喜歡跟朋友湊在一起,嘻嘻哈哈過日子。鬧出大禍後,罪疚感逼令他一下子長大過來。在這份成熟快將他逼得喘不過氣時,阿藍出現了。他強抑恐懼,將心門再度開放予這個奇妙的女生,為她改善自己。715Please respect copyright.PENANAYIFdo5VRoj
715Please respect copyright.PENANAOFX4JuPcI5
她想重新愛上這個人,用愛情回應他的付出。奈何無論她如何設法投入,複製出來的情感永遠是贗品,沒能成真。餘下在她心內的,只有歉疚。715Please respect copyright.PENANA1oYDfUK5PG
715Please respect copyright.PENANAmCNUKOnakf
「人,不能只顧回頭看,否則會失去前方美好的人事物。這是你親自教曉我的。」楠少是過來人,深諳沉溺過去所帶來的痛苦。「盡力過後,仍然沒能想起來,那就算了吧。」715Please respect copyright.PENANAptpZxEpLY0
715Please respect copyright.PENANAbhqCbim1lC
他寧可抵著心痛,亦要阿藍放下對過去的執著:「既然我們沒有當情侶的緣份,改而當好朋友也很不錯!從今以後,你不要再回頭望。你該要望望守在身邊的家人和朋友們,還要望望將來會認識到的所有人。說不定,真命天子就在其中!」715Please respect copyright.PENANA9pS29bPxKp
715Please respect copyright.PENANAT7u0PWqjUB
三日後,阿藍家。715Please respect copyright.PENANA99Mxhg2mmv
715Please respect copyright.PENANAVujKYaQjeY
電視機前,阿藍坐在新買的梳化上,和手握遙控器的阿藍媽齊齊收看有關童黨的新聞報導。明知自己是其中一名被欺凌的學生,但報導裡的一切彷彿是他人的故事。聽來奇怪,實質卻沒有甚麼值得感到出奇。715Please respect copyright.PENANA3lVNOA7oUD
715Please respect copyright.PENANAqG8q7JZgFh
連自己的過去再也跟自己無關時,還有甚麼不可能?715Please respect copyright.PENANAg6PmVWUcAj
715Please respect copyright.PENANAu9h48TdjEf
「難道世間的一切離合都可以歸咎於緣份?」阿藍定睛望著電視畫面,卻又好像甚麼也看不見。715Please respect copyright.PENANAvJLUotMiIg
715Please respect copyright.PENANACXpyiD0bFv
「你在講楠少嗎?」面對忽然高深的女兒,阿藍媽提高警覺。715Please respect copyright.PENANAAHZkweFhwV
715Please respect copyright.PENANAr7rxO9hj0k
自從三日前與楠少獨處劏房後,阿藍整個人呆呆滯滯的,比初出院時更甚。715Please respect copyright.PENANAzELXIcEWRi
715Please respect copyright.PENANApDhQVVziKS
「嗯。我跟他正式分手了。」阿藍的表情很古怪,澄明中帶著絲絲不解。「我不傷心,亦有點兒傷心……怎麼說呢?我的『不傷心』導致了我『傷心』……我已分不清楚到底自己是否傷心。」715Please respect copyright.PENANA7HsxVUgyl2
715Please respect copyright.PENANAgIlWP3UCfg
阿藍急欲釐清內心感受,可惜焦急之情令她更為混亂,逼出眼淚來。「到底我在哭甚麼?明明對楠少沒有感覺,偏偏在他說分手時感到不捨,心頭像穿了個大洞,不停在滴血,現在仍在滴血……」715Please respect copyright.PENANAinT57IEEW8
715Please respect copyright.PENANAK8zCLxkKrH
「你不是不捨得楠少。你是執著於『自己是誰』。你認為自己是楠少的女朋友,就應該做『楠少女朋友』該做的事。」阿藍媽嘆息一聲,關掉吵鬧的電視機,將哭得抖顫的阿藍擁入懷內。715Please respect copyright.PENANAOQw77wdbNP
715Please respect copyright.PENANA1Uje4Ay9rk
「你是你,不是別人的附屬品,不需為滿足別人的期望而扭曲自己,何況楠少根本沒有要求過你要為他做甚麼!他明白這是意外,失憶一事不是你的錯。他懂得放手,你亦已盡力,誰也不再虧欠對方。」715Please respect copyright.PENANAaG1UDiOH2s
715Please respect copyright.PENANADaPRlvMqH8
阿藍哭得更厲害,淚水將阿藍媽的睡衣沾濕了一大片。阿藍媽心痛地輕撫阿藍的長髮,又呵又哄的。715Please respect copyright.PENANAwGl1Txex9C
715Please respect copyright.PENANAedMQPP6chW
自從十四年前、阿藍步入校園的一剎起,這是她和阿藍最親近的時刻。兩個獨立個體、兩套獨立思想,彼此相異,彼此理解,彼此相融,成就一個和諧的群體:家。715Please respect copyright.PENANA47WHjvjbqa
715Please respect copyright.PENANA6pPFVsOIs5
活了四十多年,阿藍媽怎會看不透阿藍的脾性。奈何自己同樣固執,強要將自己的一套加諸阿藍身上。阿藍沒有作奸犯科,只是討厭吃雞蛋、愛吃零食和煎炸食物的小女生而已。無傷大雅的小事情,那就隨她吧!為何自己偏要那麼執著,硬要她按著自己那套規矩行事?純粹為阿藍著想?715Please respect copyright.PENANA3JGtC27gnY
715Please respect copyright.PENANAA95GVDAPTX
撫心自問,不是。715Please respect copyright.PENANAi6s0jv0EMV
715Please respect copyright.PENANAfd95COm9kO
成為母親後,自然而然會覺得既然自己是阿藍的長輩,她很應該聽從自己的「意見」。那不是關乎生活經驗多少、智慧深淺或合乎道理與否的緣故,而是身份、輩份、地位的問題。年月漸長,一切爭執在不知不覺間淪為渲洩情緒的方式……715Please respect copyright.PENANAZGLx78o4Dn
715Please respect copyright.PENANA3ZfDzvBRCG
依照阿藍失憶後的性格看來,最原本的阿藍是不會愛上楠少的。無可否認,過往的「一見鍾情」是建基於她在家庭關係中的失意。715Please respect copyright.PENANAqzORYbfCZe
715Please respect copyright.PENANAEhkN8YGLxs
換言之,阿藍媽是促成這段錯愛的黑手。715Please respect copyright.PENANAGMqBU69uPJ
715Please respect copyright.PENANASvXsZfo0XY
阿藍媽一邊安撫阿藍,一邊喃喃唸道:「對不起……」
arrow_back
同學很懊惱
more_vert
-
info_outline Info
-
toc Table of Contents
-
share Share
-
format_color_text Display Settings
-
exposure_plus_1 Recommend
-
Sponsor
-
report_problem Report
-
account_circle Login
Search stories, writers or societies
Continue ReadingClear All
What Others Are ReadingRefresh
X
Never miss what's happening on Penana!
同學很懊惱
Author:
天洛卡
ISSUE #36
【4.02重新做人】
LIKES 1
READS 711
BOOKMARKS 46
campaign
Request update 0
Sponsor
Suggest Edits
Login with Facebook
or Sign up/Login to comment or bookmark! Click to load the next chapter
X
After each update request, the author will receive a notification!
smartphone100
→ Request update
X
Sponsor again
Click to login
Login first to show your name as a sponsor.
Thank you for supporting the story! :)
Please Login first.
×
Write down what you like about the story
×
Reading Theme:
Font Size:
Line Spacing:
Paragraph Spacing:
Load the next issue automatically
Reset to default
×
People Who Like This
x
Before You Publish
Please ensure your story does not contain illegal, hateful, inciting, or violence-promoting content, or any infringing, plagiarized, or spam material, and that it complies with Penana’s Terms of Use.
Penana reserves the right to remove any content that violates these rules or causes legal or community risk, and to suspend or terminate related accounts.

