MOMENT 1:554Please respect copyright.PENANAv7mKuc6hc5
'Hey, listen, I think you're pretty cool.' Alice said this only after I had landed a detention for flinging my fists at her. 'We should hang out more.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAB1oZP7gKYN
I rubbed the bruise on my cheek. 'Yeah, really? You didn't think so yesterday.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAnbT2Cefb3P
'Oy.' She says. 'You were asking for it. I see fights through when I get picked on.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAtxEvBzZpgo
'I wasn't picking on you!'554Please respect copyright.PENANA7Aa3Sf8i1m
'You said my father was trailer trash, so close enough. Just don't do that again, okay?'554Please respect copyright.PENANA95BH7d79eV
What a crazy bitch. 'Fine.'
MOMENT 2:554Please respect copyright.PENANAeX00PILOOS
'You will not believe this, John. I caught Samantha and Adam snogging in the locker room.'554Please respect copyright.PENANANWysH1txDc
'You know it's not cool to gossip, right? A, I don't really care, and B, I thought I told you to leave me alone.'554Please respect copyright.PENANA3Tqix7sdKY
'Yeah, well, no one else was gonna talk to you. It's not like I scared any of your friends away.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAXHjPC8IDny
'Alice, can you learn to shut up?' I began walking away from her to make a point.554Please respect copyright.PENANAfSPpQbbi7N
'Whatever.' She laughed, godammit, she laughed as she strutted across the oval. Where the hell does she get the bloody confidence?
MOMENT 3:554Please respect copyright.PENANAoB2lcnO7br
'Hey.' I sat down next to Alice in history.554Please respect copyright.PENANAzlHfUKYTv8
'Hey, look who it is. Lemme move my stuff.' She made some extra room on the desk for me.554Please respect copyright.PENANAXugG13sXGR
I didn't want to surrender so early. 'Thanks.' I made an effort not to talk to her during the class, and she made an effort to show that she really didn't care what I thought of her.554Please respect copyright.PENANAYj2AE6xd9x
The bell rung, and as she gathered up her papers I caught glimpses of strange little sketches - a nude woman lying inside the core of a rose, spheres and pyramids in a dappled desert - and as much as I hated to admit it, she had a way with her pen, no doubt.554Please respect copyright.PENANAGdKZasy6Pt
'Oh by the way - ' she put her hand on my shoulder just before she left, and used the other to point at a figure on my page, 'it's 1954, not 1953.'554Please respect copyright.PENANApmEkoRgxrF
The bloody cheeky smile of hers.554Please respect copyright.PENANArSXdUr7Q4G
I didn't correct it until she was out of my sight.554Please respect copyright.PENANAhfsh31sj4N
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MOMENT 4:554Please respect copyright.PENANAc1Suvb0R2w
'What're you drawing?' Shit. Did I really just initiate conversation with her?554Please respect copyright.PENANAQ02MQ0lOli
She looked up with less than half the surprise I expected. Couldn't even grant me the small victories.554Please respect copyright.PENANA17Ns8pv8xu
'Just people.'554Please respect copyright.PENANALd0sNZhlKv
I crouched down beside her and glanced into her notepad. It was faces. Luke, Chris, Jenny, Samantha and Adam (kissing), Paul, and -554Please respect copyright.PENANAcwPFW01k0r
'Woah, is that me?' It was a rhetorical question, of course - the sketch was so finely crafted there could have been no doubt as to who it was. I could see my tired eyes looking back up from the page, messy hair and one hand supporting the side of my chin, angular fingers curling up a faint trail of stubble.554Please respect copyright.PENANApIITuk7JXl
'Nah, it's my brother. Of course it's you, doofus. You can take a closer look if you want.' She handed me the book, and I flipped through the pages. All pen sketches, some surrealist and some gritty and all too real. And on the last used page, me.554Please respect copyright.PENANAHqrv9iIgQa
'Why're they all in pen? Do you do any painting?'554Please respect copyright.PENANAmleSqEsYmk
She shrugged. 'I just sketch. Can I have it back now?'554Please respect copyright.PENANALgYsirvx2K
'Sure, sorry.' I handed it back into her lap. 'You, um. You're a really good drawer.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAi6sCzMNMSb
'I know, right. It's such a pity the things I choose to draw are so damn ugly, then, isn't it?'554Please respect copyright.PENANAfPpMSkeZXs
'Bastard.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAYt6l7cHFKP
But I laughed.554Please respect copyright.PENANAWWtg0mPb6Q
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MOMENT 5:554Please respect copyright.PENANAkLMUGJYgul
'Merry Christmas, you bugger.' I held out my two wrapped parcels for her.554Please respect copyright.PENANAbEzNFGnfDO
'Oy, I didn't ask for anything. So I don't feel obliged to give you something in return.' A wink. She always had a way of avoiding saying thanks.554Please respect copyright.PENANAsiiZQGTInK
'Open em. Smaller one first.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAEFqUcJx6xx
Oil paints and brushes. She never talked about money, but I knew why she only sketched.554Please respect copyright.PENANAO4qE7AB1L1
The other gift was canvas paper.554Please respect copyright.PENANADrydScAofG
'Wow.' She said. That was all. 'I really don't - '554Please respect copyright.PENANApqxDtv47JV
'Come on, take it.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAludWA5os8y
She smiled, but there was something else underneath. 'So long as you take these.' She handed the torn wrapping back into my hands before turning around and running away across the grass, footsteps light on the weeds below and laughter spiraling behind her.554Please respect copyright.PENANA2uArxVbGl7
Part of me knew, though, that the joke wasn't the whole reason for her quick exit.554Please respect copyright.PENANA8ny1WMLVXS
She didn't want me to see her crying.
MOMENT 6:554Please respect copyright.PENANAJlnZc4GZPA
'It's a few weeks late, but you finally got your Christmas present.' She was holding something wrapped in plain brown paper and string.554Please respect copyright.PENANAReZta6ZHjp
'I'll take that.' It was light, but firm. I tore the corner - canvas paper, and the smell of oil paints. 'Now that's cheating. Returning gifts much?' But she didn't laugh as I expected.554Please respect copyright.PENANA4KyL6BUuNM
It was a painting of us. Smiling, side by side, arms over each other's shoulders as we walked through a park.554Please respect copyright.PENANAqL0rXlJBWY
'Do you like it?'554Please respect copyright.PENANAQg2mpKodnQ
'I, um, yeah, I do, but -'554Please respect copyright.PENANAwQZ0aJhjy7
'But?'554Please respect copyright.PENANAiVy8g1mLlz
'Nothing. It's nice.' I didn't know what to say.554Please respect copyright.PENANAEmkHdeTPu4
'John?'554Please respect copyright.PENANAk8wi6z10cR
'Yeah?'554Please respect copyright.PENANANY7guflGdr
'I, um. I really like you and. Um.'554Please respect copyright.PENANA8SFimTVnpZ
'Okaaay, okay.' Shit, what? 'Right.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAmYKUFDD7lF
She took a few steps towards me, and (fuck) I stepped back.554Please respect copyright.PENANA77ndptxAeg
It took only that moment - that one step back - to see the hurt staining her eyes.554Please respect copyright.PENANAHUGmS58avF
'No, wait, that's not what I - '554Please respect copyright.PENANAFJbZWntpZu
'Yeah, sorry,' she said as she wiped her nose. 'Forget it. It's all cool.' She brushed down her sleeves. 'I should get going.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAllizmkGevS
'Wait!' I took a long, shaking breath. 'Listen, I... I really like you too. It's just that - I don't want anything more than this. This is all I need, this is all I want.' I put the painting down and held her wrists. 'Just this.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAgnm87ifVI4
'I... I don't understand.'554Please respect copyright.PENANAyd7t9KaiYB
'Just the way we can insult each other. The way we can mess around, the way we can talk about all kinds of stupid shit and just not care, you know? It's all I want.' To be friends.554Please respect copyright.PENANAbk2hjlSX78
She managed a smile, a tear catching at the corner of her lip. 'It's all I need.'554Please respect copyright.PENANADhNL3laVsu
I hugged her then, not whispering time old lies about love, just hugging her because I cared, because I cared about that girl who punched me, because I cared about what my feelings meant for hers.554Please respect copyright.PENANApT4tJB5K9D
'I just don't want anything to change.' I could feel, in every struggled grasp of her fingers behind my back, the futures she imagined folding in upon themselves.554Please respect copyright.PENANA8rqHGDGF7j
I don't know how long we stood there in that frozen eternity, holding each other as she gazed through tears at pastel smiles laying upon the ground in a sun-filled park only a single lost moment away.