上一次同女仔拖手已經要回溯番當年青春既大學ocamp,呢幾年黎我日日唔係留係studio做狗,就係番工搵真銀黎打機,一時之間要同個岩岩先識冇耐既女仔拖手,真係唔好話唔淆底。641Please respect copyright.PENANA1gNYtM5gPw
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「喂,你男人黎,叫你拖個手都咁拖拖拉拉,一陣你係你班屋企人面前要點見人呀?」估唔到Tiffany都會開始訓話,正常黎講作為呢種要請ptgf既客人應該見到女性都想飛禽大撲,唔好話拖手呀,直情係想奶混哂對方每一隻手指。但係見到我只係敢拉住佢隻兩隻手指,似足小朋友勾住呀媽隻手怕走散咁,佢露出左一個冇眼睇既神情。641Please respect copyright.PENANAsl9Fe4lNME
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見到Tiffany咁既表情,我都知自己咁柒左少少,把心一橫直接成隻手拖上去,其實你唔敢拖實對方係怕自己一緊張啲手汗不受控制咁尻流,但係連個女仔都唔怕,男人老狗家陣仲施施縮縮,算得上係咩男人!641Please respect copyright.PENANAljdeP1xIjL
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拖住Tiffany,我決定直接剷開人群衝上去女性樓層買野俾婆婆。641Please respect copyright.PENANAi67VHOkrdl
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係出黎之前我已經諗好左,今次一於買件好少少既名牌衫俾佢,實用、耐用、好用,過往年年你都會送件新衫俾佢老人家過年著,新年添新衣係中傳統習俗黎,呢獲仲要係名牌!我係心中暗笑,今次仲點輸呀?641Please respect copyright.PENANA0UZmAzBOjO
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但當上左一層轉入去比較成熟既女性衣著區後,我已經察覺到Tiffany唔對路既眼神,佢捉住我隻手問道:「咪住,你諗住送咩俾你婆婆?」641Please respect copyright.PENANAWhCjVzouTn
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「衫囉,我年年都係咁送,冇問題呀!」我拎住件自己都唔識讀個名既名牌貴衫,一臉沾沾自喜。641Please respect copyright.PENANAzbE93livY3
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只Tiffany係差在未反白眼,佢用好似望住白痴既眼神睇住我:「大佬,呢到既衫咁鬼中性唔講,你揀個款仲要咁老!」641Please respect copyright.PENANARjHZlThjGm
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「下,但我婆婆年年都係咁收架喇,有咩問題?」咁多年黎婆婆收禮明明收得好開心,我完全唔覺自己有問題,但出於禮貌都問佢一問。641Please respect copyright.PENANAKtQzLK4Omz
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「你婆婆唔一巴掌打埋黎都係因為你係佢個孫咋。」tiffany露出一個「只有女人先知女人要點」既表情。641Please respect copyright.PENANAEaSKNTIrmu
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佢捉住我向番下層行,去到女性護膚品同化妝品專櫃前:「拿,我話你知,呢個世界全部女人都有一個共通點。」641Please respect copyright.PENANAjqqrOkEc5Q
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「唔理幾老或者幾後生,佢地天性都係貪靚。」tiffany自信滿滿,當左自己係大軍師,翹住手、提高頭望住我,展露出大將風範,如果加把羽扇同埋bgm,你覺得佢應該係俾孔明上左身咁。641Please respect copyright.PENANAlJjVpGJvXr
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最後我都係決定相信女人既直覺,話哂我唔係女人,又點明女人諗咩呢?641Please respect copyright.PENANAxP3FrjjfHr
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係Tiffany既帶領下買左幾枝完全唔覺婆婆會用既咩SK-II貨品,不過心中都係有少少淆淆地,錢銀事少,大不了再搵過,但一陣如果婆婆覺得我浪費錢買埋呢啲奢侈品而小尻我,咁真係事大喇...641Please respect copyright.PENANAFsBXTYuYDk
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老人家係家族入面既威嚴,唔係得個講字。641Please respect copyright.PENANADdxX1XAf5D
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「喂,你冇同我講過你地屋企咁有錢既。」641Please respect copyright.PENANAN5yTqUvo5m
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帶住Tiffany去到位於西半山般咸道阿姨屋企樓下,Tiffany疑惑咁望住你,我呢身u記毒撚穿著點都唔似有錢人既style,冇番啲superme同埋yeeze尻鞋,完全就體會唔到個種土豪既氣質。641Please respect copyright.PENANAYrk7O1lkl5
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「拿,搞清楚,唔係我屋企,係我親戚屋企有錢,如果我有佢地咁有錢?我就一早唔洗做喇。」我誠懇咁樣回應。641Please respect copyright.PENANA9rUbRGOJGY
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坐車過黎既路上我已經簡單咁同佢講左講家族既情況,同埋一陣有咩怪要打。641Please respect copyright.PENANAfsUVR5MT75
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家族既頂點係婆婆,之後落黎個層就係搞生意好成功既大舅父同埋姨丈,而我老母雖然冇咩大成就,但係卻係婆婆最愛錫既女,因此地位超凡。再落一層就到其他長輩,最基層就係我地呢班後生仔。641Please respect copyright.PENANA2emzjLWatE
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而今日我地今日中午最大既敵人就係細舅父個位每次都最鍾意捉住我黎鞭屍既老婆,我既細舅母,而一陣中午食盤菜時應該就要同佢地正面交鋒。641Please respect copyright.PENANA8jyx9OWap5
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但係細舅母都只係隻道中boss咋,殺傷力根本唔大,佢個種唔痕唔癢既人身攻擊我每年都受過唔少次,因此長久以黎都已經習慣左。641Please respect copyright.PENANAcABQvBqAyj
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係到左夜晚,去酒店食飯時要面對既一班三唔識七三姑六婆先係大佬!每一個人,每一把口都係可以將你禁係地下磨擦到體無完膚既大殺器。641Please respect copyright.PENANATDKgwHFc5q
就係咁,我同Tiffany輕輕鬆鬆咁樣理清楚成個schedule將會點樣run落去。而我地兩人都係唔知唔覺間已經黎到左樓下641Please respect copyright.PENANAOYp3w7hnhF
呢個時候我感覺到一股唔尋常既氣,果然黎料!平時聲都唔聲既看更居然一反常態,好主動咁樣行埋黎幫我地開門。新年一到,呢一班沉睡左成年既猛虎終於一一甦醒,準備要吞噬住客同訪客既血肉。平時佢就算認得我個樣,都會等我自己慢慢去一邊禁密碼推門入去,今日居然一個個都咁醒神。641Please respect copyright.PENANAylB2Pe177z
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果然呢一班人有住非凡既職業操守!641Please respect copyright.PENANArqeGcKOcyg
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「喂,明仔早晨呀!」看更福伯上前滿面笑容。641Please respect copyright.PENANAWR7pPdPJfj
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「福伯,早晨。」俗語都有講,伸手不打笑臉人,我緊係以禮還禮。641Please respect copyright.PENANAlmujbf4nK0
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因為係熟人,所以都已經慣左唔洗登記訪客資料喇。641Please respect copyright.PENANAsymWiLJczN
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「哦,呢個係呀林太佢邊位親戚?咁靚女我記得見過既,俾我諗下先!我好似有少少印象。」福伯一黎就同我玩起自然熟,呢位我既短暫女友佢明明見都冇見過,仲要係到話有印象。641Please respect copyright.PENANAYnImDzJ66O
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「唔係呀福伯,佢係我女朋友黎。」我應道。641Please respect copyright.PENANAwRo3cvspOB
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「哈哈,明仔唔好玩喇,我記得佢既!佢同呀林太個女呀茵咁似樣,俾我諗多兩秒先!」641Please respect copyright.PENANAr7ulcpJg2K
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唔知道福伯係俾你阿姨同表妹灌輸左咩知識,死牛一面頸咁覺得佢唔係你女朋友。641Please respect copyright.PENANA3C4Lznd9x0
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「唔係呢,伯伯!我真係明仔佢女朋友。」Tiffany先係望住固執既福伯同埋一直係到解釋既你偷笑,睇夠你出醜後終於出聲幫我解圍。641Please respect copyright.PENANAerDeW03DOd
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福伯微微合埋對眼瞄住Tiffany,然後又望望我。641Please respect copyright.PENANAoA7ZQMaodV
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「哦。」641Please respect copyright.PENANAbCXM9B6D3q
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叮——641Please respect copyright.PENANAKT5Nm7JkXL
好在呢個時候,電梯既到來成功咁將我係困境中救左出黎。641Please respect copyright.PENANASRXXBIfkfr
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「Lift到喇,福伯遲下再傾喇。」我發覺連個管理員都可以撚化自己,真係走夾唔頭咁拖住Tiffany走佬。641Please respect copyright.PENANADbmqXGb4Hv
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係入Lift前你都仲聽到福伯講左句,「表親相戀算唔算係近親相姦呢?」641Please respect copyright.PENANAWnHSYFZClf
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...641Please respect copyright.PENANARlR4MVS0fA
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屌!!!641Please respect copyright.PENANAIkTVFy1lUy