Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZakeYga40a
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“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6ACfsnTb7
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The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTXmnMcZYY
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“I love you,” he said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGgHjTmrfu
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“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCopJRr20Bd
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“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9SPMEMp15
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“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cwsiuFKuK
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“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdBe3BM4rk
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“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKMTRZvVQb
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“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfY08CJamSV
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She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5aQ1TVtdxi
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The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnmpmIaeew
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Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSt4plxd89
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“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxB8AHSaK6
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She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSVQcNcxIvI
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It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUkPIg7GN2
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He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx2M5BpKSMQ
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Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGJ6pH7Clzg
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He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQYiEauzCXM
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He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmetwkv4Byw
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He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL2TSh8djX9
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One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAvCnBLEZy0
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“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrLPiLEAzSh
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“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFnpwyEIr41
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“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVy0SApE3Sl
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“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9g0JjvjDLJ
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Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEXbsMeN59
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“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKyDfDQjfa
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“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1TC5tmST2
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“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCJmTYMwOg
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“Oh, Master’s then?” 745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OoDiYjFst
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“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIWgzK35raf
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“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfBJI142kuv
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Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZq1u8ZK2W
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“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZi1gPgZGi
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Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bHI9yWiO9
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He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPU1uM7Z7V
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He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUZUsEZTAc
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He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRkGdxMY3y
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He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTydgLkTnM
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It isn’t possible.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFsfPxUS9Cu
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He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQGDeSo2Wo3
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He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNiBB9KgWbX
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Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gvKjdtRPd
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If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVqivbS8ZTf
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But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4NnDyXjdx
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Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtzAQiTDzWb
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“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZuS3ag2fV
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“Like what?” he said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuE1b5vjBuI
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“Getting married, having kids,” she said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJ39asfCjr
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“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFvulhicx1
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“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9NXdIG0uW
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Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNFYyURCdr
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“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9U3smGbgA
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Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3Dvu4o760
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“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYfXeP2dq2
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This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0khUF6elyK
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Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqrKWJ5qUx
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Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWLS607w37
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“Who are you?” she murmurs.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxUFinTKG49
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He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdqcuDm14p
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“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmVWYHvK7n
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“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitLZQY7j8e
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He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNuncggH0l
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“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSWMdAMYGsz
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He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCepdyqlVL
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