我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk5DFPADgrC
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFaHt8boJF4
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSxQJfqSbX
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHf02YpJfRI
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylqoxRPCh6
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BiGxqIse4
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLDMBNeiuTG
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90lmISm1Uj
壓力似乎一併消散。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RsgKILGws
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlho21HwAkd
茶盡。我再續杯。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZ1TH0NQAX
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZLZ0M0u8A
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0P3xeSVXn
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwWPvvmJw2p
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3SSibmFV8n
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVXQy6DkAZ
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRQEK8XZf1K
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKrw4BMwdB
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE92c11janQ
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexMcNDkYxy
夢醒一場空。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJVB7cMNY8
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡydsJ92t3X8
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOqBnAfqwm
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIHliDb5Yg
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJTBZWQN4be
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7MLmDnFMp
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzW1NzFnsCU
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcyENbcMt5i
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1lKwKNwpz
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbnbA3niEhR
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmsAU8egrY
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTnaNMp5DK
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6wYBqj5ep
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedWBKgO794
我沾沾自喜。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv67GqsDNMY
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6nRFBf9pX
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfSSzEhg5l
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxWvdi9H38
但我沒有向同學們坦白。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSnQaf1kRKK
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLOFGvvUnZ
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxlsykk81Ur
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZSwTUrU42
努力，努力，努力。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmi1ahs7JnB
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MLDk7V90A
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJklFpUt4IZ
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTfOAvBSu7F
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOE6UfiPglG
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIkQxQsKBZ
以為。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIyDCYVi2KU
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKTHIn2kt3
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YbTWt8cv1
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7TeY6bris
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8ertucuA1
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqXsLoIZCnA
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfpf8z1IJs
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJABKtnyFsb
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYsVvTzOtr5
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghTIIvfrNR
我的作品感動了我。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kJsHUdjh7
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWNxCHYFVt
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwM1mOM9ETD
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdTmff9WUiM
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWAkqPrkBp
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoiWV5i6zQy
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bqXZYS0xe
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyctsmQBPcn
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeLrIgGeU2
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ456CGaCt8N
熱茶又涼了。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifoYr5JcYf
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbSFqATIQZf
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIPdQsuy5e
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaiwa2QHCK
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSe6bUAlLox
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEfFCILuwm
我的作品只感動了我。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTW5GfITL4
561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMKZNiwmiT
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。561Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfgq92Rudm
然後按「加至主畫面」