我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp6UhyEEPj0
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRR9bVnAkXm
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHIExwji0u
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb5aXIb9lm5
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFg1FAMRXJ
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTv1V8Y49Fq
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrzjkHJLRw
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrTvFUm5QK
壓力似乎一併消散。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMe4cUFJ2NA
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnB3U2cJpU
茶盡。我再續杯。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1RhxuRL0t
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKqZqvcqml
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtR2GkkVM4j
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfa33GmLT8E
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVrsSXbsTX
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcugRQchMFn
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Rb0kTcKhU
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwyV7HDujBU
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvID5pa5b8
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUd3h0F2uM
夢醒一場空。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5CBuTQET3
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡutMi6qDlYM
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJwdNJ33Aj
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe5aizWyYiu
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUT47Lyl4k4
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9TwwHGX5n
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhyNdyLfec8
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1ZhDeLmTn
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvlgf2uceMq
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqCebIBrac
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQfOwWz6tN
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxoLY3UbPWA
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYUKh35lHa1
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZgPptVS9W
我沾沾自喜。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQb0CEhttP
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ89uNWw3udQ
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1G3phIOa7
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0xEy5xmy2A
但我沒有向同學們坦白。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUoaDqd6ZJ
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKFcgHg2If
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyvsZd9VhV
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDysbSeVqLV
努力，努力，努力。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuGuItqYnR
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqaPRYbgxia
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNiY7Z7PtnR
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUgZNCfWZjf
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLDWve6RCp
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZz3RdRyyUB
以為。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3XV5bYPiq
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJaKjBoMsEi
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4v0G5LJEpG
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbhrwuEBLG
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtcdXJu9RS
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLgH1kND5D
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxo6DdsYg6p
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTz6JNDoe2z
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ALSKh64Ob
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJrENgAn7b
我的作品感動了我。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsKAO2GtHg
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiAqfkQhMfc
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FC06qHGiw
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsnR37P8aG
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKIbOv6DJnW
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnZzsltX47H
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqfap8af3gd
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6EDWKLv8Lz
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZEjHbLfS3
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4pFLKgfBS5
熱茶又涼了。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKgHPxpvd8
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGri7IqBJYh
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHAqUeeiDO
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhvJOEZFE06
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6u9qvx4Pgz
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE26PZSAirv
我的作品只感動了我。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF9knGftB5I
457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1B7ECBxPtZ
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。457Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL04uEoWzrq
然後按「加至主畫面」