那一天後 - 8月21日第14日

起床後的我滿臉疲態。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtTqSAxaNI
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我晚了一點起床，梳洗過後就立即出門。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UGbyTUXY1

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我想要偶遇她，只是理解時間上應該有點差異。我習慣的這個時間，是她第一天的上班時間，而今天，我想她大概是早了出門。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJgpTstnuSW

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又到了公司樓下吃早餐。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJi1QuRtf3

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我在寫著這小說，在想她的需要，不想再找無謂的話題，只想做到令她感到我的關愛的事。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccTs4AvGmi

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上班也在不間斷的寫著，途中感覺到毒癮的發作。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc5Api1ynlJ

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於是我祭出心理鹽水這殺著，然後選擇當沈思的大衛。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2qFc0NuG40

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聽著歌，一個人。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtH7PEXiTOx

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在小小的空間裡靜靜地寫作。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡguxsSJsFz6

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…………745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WXfMYmXZK

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中餐之後，今天會有一個「自由兼職者」來幫忙，那人年資比我多一點，我想她大概是一個渴望自由的人。我也是這種人，但她和我想像是很大程度上的差距。在我眼裡她是為了生計而東跑西走。但我想要的是一個屬於我的地方。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCWI6wDZpL

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縱是這樣想著，看著她，我還是覺得此人比起我這籠中鳥還好。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBs75EI1bZ3

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隨著我的工作量不斷增加，我也感到內心的失控感在直線遞升。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8ZuXLtkuN

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哪怕有人幫忙，也只是為了不給我去煩惱另一些的麻煩事，工作量根本沒有減輕。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSCseZiYJY

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而且我也要安排她的工作。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE3bN1TxZuX

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其實我的狀態也不太想工作，心不在焉。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ZVrh3Jscc

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隨此之外，還要做著比賽的設計，重重的山壓下來，我感覺到我很像之前那位走了的同事。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNxrILadyM

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對我來說，上班的工作應該是最嘔心。那些不務正業直到快死了才問你要東要西的人、還有那些有五十至一百張，一張一張輸入到雲端的麻煩文件。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNlc9FAyR3f

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我也嘗試著聽不同的歌和資訊。了解苦情歌賣座，但畢竟那不合我的性格，我會愛聽不放棄的歌。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjafh3y9v4f

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當然，心癮來到我也會用「心理鹽水」。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fOXGEGO0N

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下班後，我做了一會兒工作，便出去吃點東西後再到運動場。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hb8GJtiu4

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運動場的地面很濕滑，那些膠沙有時是滑滑的，我找了轉彎線內圓的地方做體能。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRRWyD1uFN

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一直做著做著，由運動場充斥著一群人，做到空無一人。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuK5pk1VMGi

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做了四組運動，全身上下的毛孔都似是哭出來般，但同時又感覺到自己的堅持與意志力。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvEUVLHKnhl

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做著的時候，會在想「這到底是誰想出來的鬼東西！」745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvoGage0day

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就像我的人生一樣，這算什麼鬼東西。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5tpvD9QMc

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我只好做好自己，好到一個比十個月前更好的自己等待她回來。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtpk7fIx1HJ

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全身哭了的我回到家。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqmwVpV6nY

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或許毛孔代替我已哭乾了的雙眼。745Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLVL0akIKQy

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最後沈沈睡去。

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