弗羅里達 - 第一場 (交通公具上) 1.1

第一場 (交通公具上)

人物: 程若真 阿堅, 大文, 肥婆

程若真: 阿堅，你睇下……

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阿堅: 睇乜呀?

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程若真: 果邊呀…

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阿堅: 有乜嘢睇啫? 果邊咁多人，又無靚女。

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程若真: 坐係度果個男仔呀。

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阿堅: 男仔? 佢靚仔咩?

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程若真: 頂！你講左去邊呀?

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阿堅: 又係你自己話睇男仔嘅。

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程若真: 我都唔係基，佢靚唔靚仔關我鬼事咩！

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阿堅: 基又有乜問題喎?

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程若真: 因人而異啦。

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阿堅: 咁佢又有乜咁好睇呀?

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程若真: 我頭先明明見到佢望到個大肚婆，但佢都唔起身讓坐，仲要係度扮訓，呢D人真係衰。

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阿堅: 香港好多人都係咁，宜家D人都無禮讓嘅意識嘅，我做嘢都見唔少啦。

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程若真: 我話佢一定係大陸人，係大陸人先會咁無教養。

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阿堅: 咁你又唔好咁標籤人地。

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程若真: 咩標籤，頭先我俾個大陸"阿蟬"果格拖車"look"到隻腳，宜家仲痛緊。

阿堅: 咁你宜家想點呀?

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程若真: 一於教訓下佢先得。

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阿堅: 你唔好亂黎喎，你想點呀?

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程若真: 影佢相，放上網lor

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阿堅: 唔好啦。

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程若真: 唔咩好啫，宜家個個都係咁架啦。

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阿堅: 個個係咁唔代表啱架嘛。

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程若真: 我剩係知我唔將佢嘅罪行公諸於世，我就真係唔啱喇，影佢出黎，等人唔好學都好嘛。

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阿堅: 俾人發現你影人相唔係咁好。

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程若真: 咁你宜家係咪要拉我呀? 唔係，你就唔好嘈。我部機 download左個偷拍功能，可以不知不覺連環拍架。

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(程若真將智能手機放在耳邊，裝作傾談。)

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程若真: 你睇下。

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阿堅: 嘩，係好多張喎。

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程若真: 呢個 Apps 好勁架。神不知鬼不覺就攪掂左喇。

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阿堅: 宜家呢科技真係太過份，呢種Apps幫左好多偷拍狂。真係狂徒隨時係你左右。

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程若真: 頂！你講我呀?

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阿堅: 你係正義公民嘛，點敢講你。

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程若真: 費事睬你，我做正經事。

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阿堅: poor guy!

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(程若真厲了阿堅一眼)

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阿堅: 我都唔係話佢poor, 我話你 poor呀, 辛苦你。

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程若真: 我知……宜家d警察好寸，但你宜家休緊班，可唔可以唔好咁寸呢?

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阿堅: 莫講話我係一個全職嘅警察，就算係一個part time 嘅警察，佢地休緊班嘅時候見到個賊偷嘢，佢地係唔會因為自己休緊班而唔去追個賊架，明未?

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程若真: 得！我唔想再聽你d警察理論。

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阿堅: 不過我想話你知，我同你熟先寸你之嘛，又唔見我阿豬阿狗都去寸。

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程若真: 阿豬阿狗，阿豹阿狼，你當然唔會去寸啦，但你係人都寸呀嘛。

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阿堅: 你講架渣，唔係我講架。

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程若真: 我宜家有講錯咩。

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阿堅: 就係無，所以由宜家起，我要寸你多d。

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程若真: 點解呀?

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阿堅: 証明你係人嘛。

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程若真: 頂！俾你陰返我轉頭添。

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阿堅: 點呀? Upload完未呀?

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程若真: upload張相要幾耐啫? 攪掂好耐啦。

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阿堅; 唓，咁你仲一邊同我講嘢，一邊對住部手機。

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程若真: 大佬呀，upload完啫，咁我都要跟進一下架。

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阿堅: 有乜要跟進呀?

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程若真: like

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阿堅: like 乜鬼?

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程若真: like 呀?

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阿堅: 咩嘢like呀?

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程若真: 玩嘢呀你，我要睇下有幾多人like我d嘢呀。

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阿堅: 哦……仲以為你要跟進d乜。真無聊。

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程若真: 你就無聊，都不知幾重要呀。

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阿堅: 原聞其詳。

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程若真: like 令我充滿自信，like 令我被別人認同，like 令我身心舒暢，like令我建立地位，like令我建立友誼。

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阿堅: 有冇咁多呀?

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程若真: 最重要係，like令我有返人生目標。

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阿堅: 乜話? 追like都可以係人生目標?

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程若真: 咩唔得呀? 我日日都不知幾努力咁諗d金句同留意身邊有乜好相去upload。

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阿堅: 咁你個人生一定係好苦悶。

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程若真: 苦悶得過同你去街?

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阿堅: 我已經成日寸你架啦喎，你仲覺得苦悶?

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程若真: 都叫你搵番條女拍下拖架啦，一放假就搵我，對得你多都悶。

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阿堅: 如果你日日對住個靚女，睇你會唔會覺得悶?

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程若真: 你都話靚女啦，唔係你呀。雖然，你都靚，但可惜不是你。講真，洗唔洗我介紹俾你呀? 我大把貨喎。

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阿堅: 有好嘢你仲唔自己上先? 係你手指溜得出黎嘅真係靚極有限。真係多謝哂。

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程若真: 唔要就算。嘩，你睇，同你講左一陣就over 左100個like 啦，仲有人comment加添，正!

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阿堅: 唔好睇住，你睇下果邊，佢落車喇。

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程若真: 仲睇? 落車啦。

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