A/N: A somewhat tongue-in-cheek skit as you can probably tell from the title, but this was plenty of fun to write. Maybe I'll return to properly finish it one day. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCJFx1cw19
-:-913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAbcvHcFaM
THE TYPICAL GOTHIC VICTORIAN MELODRAMA, ONLY GAYER AND LESS WHITE913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTeQ7360SE
CHARACTERS913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyOVqtfkgsW
CECIL - male, twenties, biracial, well-dressed913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqKmsH9Fon
XIUYING - female, twenties, Chinese, no-nonsense; a suffragette913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0ehVwaQ5s
--913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2T4GaDv51R
EXT. GARDEN BENCH, NIGHT913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApPF7RuFCZ
Early twentieth century. CECIL sits, head in his hands, as XIUYING studies a handwritten letter with furrowed brows. She carefully folds it back up and turns to CECIL.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRpIkx9EUX
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDtOVlZLjr
We don’t have much time.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC4SkCV2eiU
CECIL
I’m surprised we have any time left at all! It only came in the post this morning. What the hell am I going to do?913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcCrxYJTpn
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqk491O5Tb
First, you need to calm down so we can consider the situation. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUIeYT7CXkf
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhW462Zpv6
Calm? Calm? How can you expect me to stay calm after that? My lover is blackmailing me over poetry - explicit poetry that I sent him! He expects a thousand pounds by tonight, or else I’m in for ruin and two years hard labour!913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡajo57nefSM
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBwHgY1fFQ6
I understand you’re upset - 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFCgQHNtFL
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMpN7oFSuO
I damn well am! 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmE5Z8viulJ
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbm0Pw6HKSQ
- but panicking will get nothing done. I am so sorry this happened, Cecil, and… I’m so sorry about Laurence.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOM4LtwDdi
CECIL, stricken anew, breaks down. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9eDClWhL4y
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6blxhfPx8R
Dear God, I trusted him. The first person I ever trusted with my love, and he betrayed me. I didn’t know he had it in him. We were all so careful. There was no possible chance of discovery. The three of us were the only ones who knew. I don’t understand why he could do this. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kpM51P6bc
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlexwaWst0
(slowly)913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPBRLGH31j
As a matter of fact, I highly doubt it was him at all.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0nwgAThtnu
CECIL freezes and looks up at her. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFYYj8C9DWg
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIgCRrUWyTw
What?913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQzWg0JzX1
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzYOWYer9ck
I cannot in good conscience believe that Laurence is behind this.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPz3JYJ2Dk
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65zyke3gyk
Xiuying, what on earth are you talking about? This is Laurence’s handwriting. This is the very ink and paper he uses to write his plays! (He gets angry.) Do you think I haven’t considered the possibility that the love of my life couldn’t be blackmailing me like this? This is undeniably him!913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ZCiDsvmCm
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb8sTCvdCl7
Yes, but if you had taken the time to read over this thoroughly, you would notice that his handwriting is wobbly.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5EnJSUdKAT
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKljJQQN81E
It’s always wobbly. Messy handwriting is the staple of any artist.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5tSkULAmHA
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMpIPO6aVtY
Messier than usual, I mean. You two may be lovers, but I’m the one who’s known him since grammar school. He only ever writes like this when he’s upset or under exceptional stress.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvo1VgkmC2K
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsdJcO5nvj
Well, maybe he was nervous, pulling the rug out from under someone who trusted him. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMXAal2kDN
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSoOJSXAIPF
That may be the case, but look at this.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmO3BzNRazo
She points at several dark brown and rust-coloured stains at the edges of the paper. There are ink blotches everywhere, but these particular spots, upon close inspection, are distinctive. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3hSNH8vEs
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwhWuTQYpgU
If I’m not mistaken, that is blood.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYgsFE832o
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwm9x3OPVq
Blood? (A pause as horrified realization creeps in.) Oh, dear God. Laurence.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PffCOA2qV
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogo4v3v7ZD
(grimly)913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjLZxAqWXS
Exactly. There’s something deeper here, far worse than what’s on the surface. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfC8yO5Cy1S
CECIL913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn40u3XwM7L
But - but if someone is forcing Laurence to write this, then how - how can we get him back? I don’t own a thousand pounds. I couldn’t possibly pay this person off.913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKYoTUTw6tn
CECIL is shocked to turn and see XIUYING smiling faintly. 913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFDNeUoflGn
XIUYING913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0PlTwYpfmC
Who said anything about paying them off?913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjOTjYBdwf
--913Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SxPKQYyiV
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