/story/30396/評-悲/issue/9
評《悲》 - CHAPTER 9 - 妳頭也不回的走 | Penana
arrow_back
評《悲》
more_vert
  • info_outline Info
  • toc Table of Contents
  • share Share
  • format_color_text Display Settings
  • exposure_plus_1 Recommend
  • report_problem Report
  • account_circle Login
share bookmark_border file_download
info_outline
format_color_text
toc
comment 2
exposure_plus_1
Search stories, writers or societies
Show More Tags
Continue ReadingClear All
More
What Others Are ReadingRefresh
See more results for ""
X
Never miss what's happening on Penana!
Turn on notifications
Later
評《悲》
ISSUE #9
Author:
評《悲》
Author:
ISSUE #9
CHAPTER 9 - 妳頭也不回的走
No Plagiarism!xyek0hVHSJv6XEp3B9JTposted on PＥNAＮＡ

第三句的 「的」 應改為 「得」 。

第四句的 「的」 應該刪除。

第八句的 「的」 應改為 「地」 。

此外大致上沒有問題。

總體來說，能夠扣緊主題： 「妳頭也不回的走」，但只能突出其中憤怒及無奈，並不能突出其中的悲。

可以改善的地方：

將無奈及憤怒的情緒轉化為悲，並將整個重心放於後方重點。

完。807Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNSw8ohq44P

216.73.216.95

ns216.73.216.95da2
Comments (2)
BOOKMARK
+RECOMMEND
LIKES 0
READS 803
BOOKMARKS 1
Suggest Edits
Login with Facebook or Sign up/Login to comment or bookmark!
< Prev Issue
Next Issue >
Click to load the next chapter
Be the first to like this issue!
×
評《悲》
Essay
Last updated: Dec 29, 2017
Total word count: 1,079
Total reading time: 4 Minutes
評《悲》
Report this story
×
×
Write down what you like about the story
×
Reading Theme:

Font Size:

Line Spacing:

Paragraph Spacing:

Load the next issue automatically


Reset to default

X
×
x
Proceed

x
Before You Publish
Please ensure your story does not contain illegal, hateful, inciting, or violence-promoting content, or any infringing, plagiarized, or spam material, and that it complies with Penana’s Terms of Use.
Penana reserves the right to remove any content that violates these rules or causes legal or community risk, and to suspend or terminate related accounts.
arrow_back
×

Select a reason:

×

Install this webapp for easier offline reading: tap and then Add to home screen.