It was a VERY strong wind that day, and I absolutely swear to god that none of it was my fault. Seriously, guys. It was the WIND that knocked my umbrella into that dork's face. And his coffee fell too, rolling away. I explicitly articulated my most SINCEREST apologies and how I was just as much publicly humiliated as him.
"What is wrong with you-- I'm Gabe by the way--," he took my gloved hand to shake before returning to his nuclear meltdown. "--And what is wrong with you, coming out of nowhere, a ninja slash cat monkey assaulting my vulnerability, battering me to a pulp, leaving me struggling within in an inch of my life. I have asthma, you brute. Precious people like me die from wheezing. How dare you."
"I am MIRANDA," I shrug at Gabe. "Guess I am TOO MUCH of a woman for you."1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdLFU0gTz0r
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8RJNDBDlq
With the last word, I STRUT away. A minute later, it grew apparent he won't let that happen. He ran to my side, stammering and BLUBBERING like a fool.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSlKqNmr5U
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"Now, just wait a gosh-darned second here!" Gabe raised a finger. I kept a straight face when inside I just wanted to LOL. "You still owe me coffee-- and for mangling my face-- who knows if I ever see you again."1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmOgccB0vy
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcUangts2D
"I did not MANGLE your face! The wind did! Your face is not mangled, your face is perfectly FINE!" I huffed, realizing we stood outside the cafe. "I am being blackmailed and entrapped. I am not okay with it!"1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡseq9JeRCCO
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqEl18yighK
The clouds roared back, and rain shattered. I fought with the umbrella.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmyak3iMv6
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"So it's a date!" Gabe shouted over the hysteria. 1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkqUOBglh2N
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ79xX1HGUpz
"NO. GOODBYE FOREVER." I stormed off into the storm, wrestling with the umbrella and the wind. It took until the stoplight when Gabe ran up at the moment the wind grew VERY strong again. I swear to god, it was NOT ME the first time and it was STILL not me the second time. SMACK.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmdRhy6YgnT
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEC17DOdOsV
The umbrella slapped Gabe ... again. I SHRIEKED in horror.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuSpjH6wXw
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"What is wrong with you-- ," Gabe said as the pedestrian sign lit up and chased me across the splashing street. "-- I think I'm bleeding! Am I bleeding? My poor mangled face. You may rob me of my coffee and my dignity but you can't get rid of me that easy, infernal murderess. A menace to society, I say! We are all in danger!"
"Then stay FAR away from me!" 1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6yRQ2FpTn
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9VhMSRjoR
Gabe took my gloved hand, and at that moment our hair rose. White lightning struck -- shocking us both. We keeled over, tased and jolted in waves until it was over. We glanced at each other with fresh and cooked eyes. Smoke steamed from our bodies. Boots were knocked from our feet. We marveled that we were electrocuted and somehow miraculously survived. I nodded, "Okay... Coffee sounds good right now..."1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3T2kwiULpG
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2UOVOpTNXB
"So it's a date, Miranda," Gabe said, pleased. "That is spectacular."1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCE9jCBvhba
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBQQ2ZojY8
"It is NOT a date," I insisted. "This is strictly normal and boring. People get hit by lightning all the time, Gabe."1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqljAqX8Dx
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"And you're buying!" He pointed an accusing finger.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTQm6huRJO
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"No, if anything it is YOU who are buying," I bickered. 1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3W7RlLvYCz
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztToRr41nc
"If I'm buying, ergo it's a date."1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUX1mCRyj66
1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvXDFpIHN8s
"NOPE. WRONG. Regardless of someone buying, it is NOT--"1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymd3L1WUCw
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We got struck by white lightning twice and wound up in the hospital, in the same room, with a curtain drawn between us. We spent hours staring at the ceiling arguing whose fault it was and how awful the coffee were here.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5R5Q4vqaL
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Then his voice stopped. I looked at the curtain, hearing a droning flatline. I tore the curtain back. He was off the machine, leaning in for a kiss.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjwXFsRUX5D
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"Kiss me?" 1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSpkRnvP77T
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It was so OBVIOUS he was going to be my husband.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSS43qF7qgZ
So OBVIOUS he was going to be the father of my child.1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Ks74L8uPX
Gabe. That sweet dork. How can I not love him? 1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzLvAXnPrcC
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"No, you kiss me," I said. His eyes closed, as if to melt.
In our hospital gowns, we locked lips. And the rest?1141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeV5S4tA6B1
The rest was, as they say, a WEIRD love story.
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