文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7XMi5ejJoB
夜晚的運動場總是比較熱鬧：深紅色跑道上那相伴散步的老人家、起勁跑得汗流浹背的男男女女、聽著音樂輕鬆慢跑的中年人士、餐後打算慢步輕鬆聊天的三、四人行……被跑道包圍的淺綠大草地上，那些邊踢著足球，伴著高呼聲和青春氣息的熱血球隊……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0l1lEMfjIN
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbSFU81Dje
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PeFrnXLDC
場上打得光亮的燈光，讓每個人的臉龐身軀都清晰可見。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypahnxV3AB
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIxLagvgpV
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNB8sx9wZZ5
半個月前開始，每到晚上九時正，就會有一位穿著深藍色麻布長裙、披著淺灰色針織冷外套的女生步入運動場，默默一個人沿著跑道散步。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBq2ScXhmj
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1REdPPDdf
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYaXhhAcLZ
藍色長裙，深紅色跑道，蒼白的臉容。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9STR1uvMdu
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJcp1uVDhr
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72xsbfWqXs
她的眼神總是迷離地注視著遠方，思緒總像飄往他方，落入沉思中。不知她的思想處於哪方，反正不會是此時此刻當中。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2K41GTRvR
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUmCX1FP4T
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcEImGH3vj
其他運動場上的人總會納悶這個女生為什麼不換上運動服裝，而再穿上和運動場格格不入的長裙子。離奇的是，每當她走完一圈，她步伐經過的地方，總會遺留下一串細小的物件：第一天是卡通小本子、聖誕卡、鎖匙圈、毛公仔、便利店印花……第二天是某日本餐廳的卡片、台灣抒情女歌手的舊唱片、蠟筆繪畫……第三天是都市愛情小說、木梳子、羽毛球、筆袋……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9sk2Uta2I4
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6XS4AZLXx
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPoagwWyOVU
往後的日子也是如此，每天物件偶爾會重複著……只要旁人觸摸到物件，物件便會消失。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3RpowJJFFG
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDC7NJDXJM
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcv3W77uGk
—————————————————————————416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8RMnpXHCF
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyWlmq4aCJ
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCkZITJzfxo
長裙女生叫柏甯。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuLLlyoLCit
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡineVGUwRvo
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv2HVS9CWA5
柏甯會去運動場散步，只是她覺得有時候晚上待在家時，像被困在一個無處可逃的空間裡，會略感沉重無力，心口像有東西壓著，卻不知如何拎走。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEA2Wz6H5n
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWMd8qmoIEV
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMt4oSfhOtR
她覺得，她需要走出外面的世界，她想走路，一步一步的向前走。伴著沒有星星的夜空，走著走著，帶動著思緒，她覺得心會開朗一點點。於是，她開始萌生去運動場散步的念頭。她沒有運動服，也不打算買。她本來也糾結穿著長裙去運動場會否很奇異，但她覺得別人最多只會瞄一眼就轉臉經過她罷了，別人也不會多花心思在她身上，每個人最著緊的都是自己。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx2LlQmfaxe
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPOUGTJkmD
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhm8aINoENr
不過，散步時，心裡變得舒暢的同時，柏甯裝著一連串回憶的腦袋，和蘊釀著情緒的心，也開始一小步一小步解放起來，記憶與情緒會交錯浮現，如河川氾濫著……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg66cxU1op2
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAEGqgeVfga
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3BsdGwWww
今天是她決定持之以恆散步的第16天。每走一步，長裙都再次搖曳著她的記憶：被人嫌棄的卡通小本子、小時候總會計算收到的數量的聖誕卡片、青春時期曾沉迷閱讀的都市愛情小說、瘋狂買東西而儲下的便利店印花、中學時期與同學一起買下的同系列筆袋、在日本餐廳被以為是接納她的好朋友責罵起來、想要模仿朋友而跟隨買下的毛公仔……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXX9utcNRsP
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPdH2oC0JEF
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpn61UmXBSm
回憶的片段總是零碎而無法收攝心神去處理。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jng0cAwHA
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡooVAGh6tyB
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHMXHI7v4mc
突然，柏甯身後出現一個瘦小的青年男子，男子輕輕拍了柏甯的肩膀一下。因為男子看到柏甯身後掉出一個手錶，他好心想提醒柏甯拾回手錶。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRJgj4Oa1Z
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxskdIwqMC
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdp0mcxf5pB
柏甯回過頭來。她回頭了。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySOeXiZPKF
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPGKtsYH1xk
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmBEdTYwYO
突然，好像有一道像玻璃反光的閃光在腦海中頻繁地閃爍著，每閃爍一下，就好像有一下疼痛在頭中敲撃起來。於是，模糊的記憶也漸漸清晰明亮起來……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjzT8cQmQAj
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Tn5dFlokG
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmZe5pwjdN
—————————————————————————416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCNvSq8EGh
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RyfNTEEL3
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnypunamet
那一晚，柏甯與一位舊同學聚餐，她一直不自覺地很崇拜這位朋友。她好像每個成長時期，心裡都會藏著一位很崇拜、又很依賴的朋友。柏甯自己會模仿那個她的眼光及品味，將那個她完美化，同時依賴著那個她的一言一行。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn221UyoufO
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTcH1c6cD0
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhwLqcaEeqH
她和她，都穿著深藍色的長裙子。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0PnkdOa4Il
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjtDed4rMa7
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8c4PjvbwSH
柏甯以為這位朋友也是真心對待著她，直到那一頓晚餐，那個柏甯以為的好朋友冷冷地吐出真心話：「妳就是什麼都不知道。不直接告訴妳就什麼都不知道。妳有什麼是知道的？妳有什麼都可以給別人欣賞的？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukOFGhH0ai
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsh8ZwmHqG
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHjmpBoNOM
那時，柏甯整個人都僵硬了，她到那刻才醒覺，自己的「不知道」原來是可笑的，原來做人並不可以「不知道」事情，否則就會被人取笑嫌棄。原來，她不是真正被朋友喜愛著。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuw7BVS7xd
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrevroJK64p
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpgwZ9M5nQ
柏甯忍受不了，可是她怕惹來朋友的反彈，她壓著生氣地回嘴：「妳可不可以不要一直嫌棄我？」她仍然冷靜又無情：「那妳說妳有什麼是可以給人欣賞的？妳什麼都不懂。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEK8RFXE88O
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VjMfAF3Ck
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkPbHSaieky
柏甯臉上依然維持平靜，但她不知如何是好，心裡只懂恐懼，眼神卻靜悄悄銳利起來。她提意結帳離開。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1rnMTGoXr
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sC2p6dj6p
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkMXhMHWE1
—————————————————————————416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusTNFbrjxT
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDRzYUSZMzR
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbG1pDIhuF7
因為回頭，她記起了……那個紅燈的刺眼光芒；那架黃色車子；那手掌推出去的力度；那道尖銳的叫喊；那手指被捉緊被拉出去的剎那間；那片紅色；那架白色車子……那指著九時正的手錶……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GUM50Wti9
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ00aPVQl3ef
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBTgl8umCci
柏甯記起來，她應該還躺在白色床單上沉睡著……而另一個她，柏甯不記得她最後怎麼了……柏甯記起自己，但她不知道如何可以回去，如何可以醒來……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmM1fHXOiz
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHMSeU7wZIW
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGiUjI9sL8
最後，之後的日子，每一天她都只有晚上九時的一剎間，她能做的，只是繼續不斷地散落自己，一步一步再向前走，沿著跑道輪迴著……416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7t3oAteJ7
文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZmI8v37ZE
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBee6pgopl
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEu5npeuGuZ
*圖片取自網絡416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC7xZNj4Wfv
然後按「加至主畫面」