Revision: Anxiety!Dark
P.O.V: First Person
(A/N: Before reading this, if you don’t know anything regarding this song, please take note that it details many aspects of depression and suicidal thoughts and behaviour. This chapter and hopefully this chapter only will contain such as well. If you are okay with this, do enjoy.)
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There was a boy I met in kindergarten
My head hurts...
He was sweet, he said that I was smart
Another visit from Dr.Panic and Nurse Anxiety.
He was good at sports and people liked him
I miss him,
And at nap time once we shared a mat
I miss the old days:
I didn't sleep I sat and watched him breathing
When we’d stay up till Dawn just fooling around,
Watched and dreamed for nearly half an hour
I miss those times,
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
But it was all a fantasy, a dream, a SICK nightmare.
Then he woke up
I dont know whether to be happy or sad that I woke up.
534Please respect copyright.PENANAAVVWh2SE14
He pulled a scab off one time playing kick ball
Bumps and lines of dark, velvete maroon decorate my wrists like a christmas tree.
Kissed me quick then pressed it in my hand
It hurts but I dont say a word.
I took that scab and put it in a locket
I let my hair down, jagged strands and uneven chunks dangle and flow in the cold night wind.
All year long I wore it near my heart
My heart sobs with an agonizing stinging.
He didn't care if I was thin or pretty
Screaming at me to just end it.
And he was mine until we hit first grade
But I just let a tiresome sleep consume me,
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
Falling into the same nightmare again...
Then he woke up
But I cant escape reality.
534Please respect copyright.PENANAoCdtyPw3G6
Last night I dreamed a horse with wings
Mascara drizzle down my eyes in hopes of a rebirth from their black and sorrowful stain.
Flew down into my home roomOn its back there he sat
I shakily toss circles and ovals in my mouth, generous amounts.
And he held out his arm534Please respect copyright.PENANAd8OtuHXBJJ
So we sailed above the gym
Suddenly my hands stop shaking and Im back on my feet.
Across the faculty parking lot534Please respect copyright.PENANAPjui1OeCkc
My kindergarten boyfriend and I534Please respect copyright.PENANAGy2LkyEQaI
And a horse with wings
My heart high on today’s ‘breakfast’.
534Please respect copyright.PENANAhVTsBKthQf
Now we're all grown up and we know better
I just want to get it all out...
Now we recognize the way things are
But...
Certain boys are just for kindergarten534Please respect copyright.PENANAOn1RTTjupz
Certain girls are meant to be alone
I guess Im all alone..
But I believe any dream worth having534Please respect copyright.PENANAd6N1ZcVbYQ
So today's the day.534Please respect copyright.PENANAE4T7CP0uLa
Is a dream that should not have to end534Please respect copyright.PENANAkM6HLPcbaF
So I'll build a dream that I can live in534Please respect copyright.PENANA7pLB0RoiYq
I sigh heavily, holding my arms out in despair.534Please respect copyright.PENANAPtH00dvFct
And this time I'm never waking up534Please respect copyright.PENANAzRbuZwbTyi
My body swings dangerously, 534Please respect copyright.PENANA69thGhTqCy
And we'll soar above the trees534Please respect copyright.PENANA9yqNDhz38r
Back and forth..534Please respect copyright.PENANAaTjNpTYzi9
Over cars and croquet lawns534Please respect copyright.PENANAT0zsnxWJ12
Back...and...forth...534Please respect copyright.PENANAPDXhdGJt6D
Past the church and the lake534Please respect copyright.PENANAlWibwDHqbL
And the try-county mall
Suddenly, a new found fear dissolves into my dangerously unstable mind.
We will fly through the dawn534Please respect copyright.PENANAiqflppc3O6
To a new kindergarten
I shake it off, tears blurring my vision;
Where nap time is centuries long
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
I let myself fall forward...
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh534Please respect copyright.PENANAICwd3wGxNB
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
The thumps echo up the stairs, Soon falling in sync of the throbbing headache I have.
Ooh ooh
”NO!! DONT!” Wait—!
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