Too much.
Not enough.
Broken.
Too depressed.
A burden.
Disappointment.
If my thoughts could talk, no one would ever believe me again. They’d never believe me if I said I was okay. That I’m fine. They wouldn’t leave me alone ever again. And I hate that.
I hate that I can’t be honest about how I feel. How I keep my pain inside and smile. The saying is ‘boy’s shouldn’t cry’, which is false, though I’ve unfortunately taken those words to heart and altered them. I changed them to ‘you shouldn’t cry in front of anyone’. I hate being honest about my feelings. Being vulnerable.
Last time I was vulnerable…I lost one of the most important people in my life.
Too depressed.
Too much.
Not enough.
Too sad.
Too broken.
You need too much.
Lay off of them.
They don’t want you.
He’ll get over you soon.
I wish they’d stop. I wish I could be good. I wish I wasn’t so insecure. I wish I could trust you. Believe you when you promise I’m not too much. That I’m not broken. That I’m the best. That I’m cute or adorable…
But it’ll take time.
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