大秦皇帝蹭我家馬桶 - 1. 「大胆妖婦」

「終於下班啦。這破公司是慫人得很！」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfxdbizpC8

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女孩拖著疲累的身軀回到家裡，二話不說打開冰柜，拿出最愛的「肥宅快樂水」，然後癱在沙發上灌下了半瓶。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dtqELRfCA

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「果然沒有快樂水的人生是不完美的。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZTS7aIAus

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打開電視，電視正翻播著那套男主穿越回秦代的電視劇。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM0tgGoE5g4

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「峯峯年輕時也很帥，但還是電影版的更令人動心。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwG4EWYnVzR

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由於加班的關係，女孩還沒有看完重播就在沙發睡著了。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡceICnJLFmO

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然後，女孩發了一個夢，她代替了「師父」回到秦朝，除了教育盤兒外，更跟李斯、王翦、呂不韋都有交集，甚至連嫪毒都…..7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbASVJb33K

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在公元前二二一年，這位將會是整個民族的第一個明義上跟實際上的皇帝忙完一天的工作。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfuWBy7B6T0

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「替寡人備虎子。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqIlkSihEE

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皇帝行至側室，問了中人一句「祖籍何處？」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjALdLluUr8

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「回大王，小臣乃易水人士。」中人顫聲回答。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2DKrKGALM

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「爾乃燕人？」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlEEAMEuA7

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一旁的侍衛聞言立即把那宦官按下，準備押下去。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeLdo5RCFoc

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「大王饒命！大王饒命！我根本不認識高漸離，怎麼可能跟他一起行刺大王。大王饒命呀。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd7eFyCrhw4

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「除了我秦國兒郎，其餘六國皆不可用。押下去。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCn4cKtTM9e

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「大王且慢！他雖然籍貫燕國，但三代皆在秦地長成，若非其父犯錯受刑，他也不至於沒入隱宮為奴。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjXKV51xq0i

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「你認識他？你不怕寡人把你當同謀論處？」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYtZZ1ultY

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「此人雖然頭腦不精，但仍知道尊君卑私。還請大王留他一命，為秦效力。」趙高一身官服跪在秦王面前說道。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrCHA7L9H05

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最終那小臣雖然被趙高救回性命，但始終因為籍貫為燕而被調走，而秦王亦終身沒有再讓一位不是出身秦地的人侍奉。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAhmzzuibg

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那邊廂，某位睡醒的女子正迷迷糊糊在上廁所，然後準備沐浴更衣。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdDPpGppbZz

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「這慫業主，廁所又沒水！再不修，額真拿你家的「上周」青銅鼎舀水沖廁！」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3CnZppBx1A

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然後，她隨手拿起一個客人送給她的虎形青銅器裝水沖廁。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpO2okBKzMM

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「還裝什麼秦朝皇室用？它是秦代的，額是武則天呢！不過倒也結實，應該不是秦朝的，是「上周」的。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XrijBHWgd

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突然身後，一把低沉的男聲響起，7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQCzQcqCQfZ

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「大膽妖婦！安敢褻瀆宮禁之物？」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7D5yQBave

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女子被突然出現的男聲嚇了一跳，反手就把手上的青銅器掉向那個古裝男人。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7yxxNoXkor

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「媽呀！你哪裡冒出來的賊子！耍流氓？給我滾！」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNq0wYC6vU

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虎子？寡人的？！7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZHz04ir7W

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但男人身手卻十分了得，見他隨手拔劍擋開青銅器，然後挽個劍花把裡面的液體濺回女孩身上。最後把劍輕輕的放在她頸上。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbolRktaPht

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「還不閉嘴，便取你首級。」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAa8jJSkftH

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女孩被眼前的古裝大佬（怪人？）的劍嚇呆，劍上的森森的寒意告訴她這劍是真的。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MidSt50Hz

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「哥⋯你⋯你冷靜點！有事好說，放低劍再講好不？你看額雙手也沒有武器，而且你昂藏六尺，跟一個弱女子較啥勁？」7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlVL9RuYCM

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那「寡人」看了看眼前的女孩，雖然她全身上上下下都透露著古怪，還有這裡陌生得很的環境，但作為帝王的自信，他知道要再次制服這女孩也不是什麼難事。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNaz8nRkGqW

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「爾乃何人？此乃何地？同黨何在？說！」秦王一邊審問，一邊收起自己的「泰阿劍」。語氣冷得要命。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhgAEPL0xw

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女孩定一定神，望著眼前的古裝男。見他一身黑金線玄衣，頭戴王冠，身材高大，面容更是俊俏得很，如果那雙眼的殺意收一收，嫑瓷腦袋就完美咧。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3K1TVgIlvM

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「回大王話，民女姜適，歡迎大王來到現代。」姜適學著古裝戲裡的女角，邊說邊戰戰兢兢的作揖彎腰。7Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKat5cwLIu

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