(1)
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The lights in the street flickered. With the chaos around, it was a miracle that some electricity was still there. It has been about a month since it all started, and there’s no signal on the line anymore.
Not that I’ve anyone to call. No one’s left to.
Mom died, and pops. And now Ryan is…
It hurts. Much more than I would’ve expected to. Why Ryan…why?
No, I can’t think about him anymore. I need to find a shelter, and that too, fast. The night is about to fall.
So, I ran around. The road was mostly littered with waste and blood and occasional corpses, and the houses all around were in pretty bad condition.
I need to eat something too, and a place to rest. I need to-
The dark alley I was crossing seemed nothing special. I did see a bit of fabric out of my eyes’ corner, but I hadn’t thought much of it.
Josh, we need to be careful from now on. Very much careful.
Ryan’s words echoed in my ear at that moment. It was almost in a flash. Something jumped out of the dark alley. Startled, I tried to take a step back but missed. And fell butt first. What the- it was then I saw it.
The loose fabrics barely resembled clothes anymore, as they slipped through its body. The ‘thing’ wasn’t really living, even if it resembled one. The skin was peeling and decaying, in some parts even the bones were showing. It’s eyes…deep red. It was practically drooling without a proper mouth. The thing was dead, yet walking.
The walking dead. In other words, a zombie.
Shit. I realized I don’t have anything to protect myself. I remembered about a knife, but soon found that the pocket was teared off from the spot. I didn’t notice. The pocket knife must have fallen off somewhere along the way.
Not that it will really help.
Shit.
It will kill me. I can’t defeat it. No no no. please. I don’t wanna die. Help me God. Please don’t kill me. Please! I-
It looks at me, still drooling. But it turned around. And left.
As it soon walked away slowly, I rose up in haste and ran away. Yes, I’m alive! I’m safe! I…
But an unknown feeling wrapped my heart. Why…
Why didn’t it kill me?
I’m…I’m still human. Am I not?
Yes…yes, I’m.
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(2)
54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcZOZnzYEo
The door was slightly opened. The insides were dark. But in the light of the recent incident, I didn’t take any more chances. I walked slowly in.
Soon I realized that it was a Convenience Store. I’ve entered through the backdoor. It was full of…supplies. Food, water, medicals. Lucky! I can spend some of my days here!
I walked around the empty floor picking up anything I might need. Everything’s here, but first, I need to defend myself in case something happens. Although it seems this place is practically-
Something moved. I saw it. Yes, just a blink. Out of my eyes’ corner. But I won’t make the same mistake again. I grabbed a big hard box and slowly strolled towards the dark corner from where a rustling sound was now coming.
Slowly. Slowly. It’s okay. Nothing to be afraid of. Fear is the mind killer.
Yes, someone’s there. And it’s probably not a human. Slowly. One blow to the head. I have one chance. I can’t miss-
A bright flash of light almost blinded me. I stepped back again, and fell butt first. Damn it. Shit!
“What the- “
“Who are you?!”
The shout suddenly made me snap back. In front of me, it was not a zombie. It was a human. A girl.
“What the!? Who are you?!”
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(3)
54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmKnG3qCQV
“Who are you?!” Asked the girl, who, now as I looked more clearly, wore a long-sleeved shirt and tattered coat.
“Go away! It’s not safe here! I- “
As soon as I stood up to gather myself together, a sharp pain was felt by my left shoulder. I grabbed my shoulder and knelt back down on the floor, unable to move.
“You…you are bleeding!”
Shit. No. leave me alone.
She came towards me, “lemme see! Oh my god, you have been bleeding for a while! The place has a deep wound…”
She tore a piece of her cloth and rushed in to bandage.
“No!” I shouted, “leave me alone! Stop!”
“Huh? What are you…saying?”
She had popped behind me with the torn piece of cloth in hand. And she had started examining the wound.
Soon, my deepest fear came true.
“Wait, were you bitten?”
It’s the same. All over again. I need to run. Before she kills me.
But I can’t move. This sharp pain is making my body numb. Shit-
“I see.”, she said in a gentle voice, “it’s the same for you then, huh?” And rolled up her sleeve. Even if it wasn’t as bad as mine, a bite mark could be seen.
“No need to worry, cause I’ve been bitten too.”
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(4)
I wanted to run, but couldn’t. as I reclined against the wall and tried to recuperate, she applied bandage on my ‘wound’.
The bleeding has stopped, but the pain…well it would take time to go away. A numbness was all over my body.
“The bite secretes anaesthetic fluids into the blood, so you don’t realize until later that you were bitten. And before you or anyone else can realize what’s happening, there’s a zombie in the group.”, she said calmly as she sat down beside me.
“How do you know all that?” I asked.
“I am a doctor you know?”
“A doctor?!”
“Yeah…even until yesterday, I was working in the hospital.”
“Wait, hospital? I thought all hospitals were- “
“Well, it’s not a real hospital per se, but some of my friends from medical college and other survivors came together to make a small ‘hospital’ to treat the injured.”
“To treat them?”
“Of course, not the ones that were bitten. We had to stone them away sometimes. There’s no cure, and we can’t risk to experiment. And I worked there until yesterday before…”, she looked down and closed her eyes.
“Before you were bitten?”
She silently nodded.
“Did they also…umm…st…. stone you?”
“Huh?” She was startled a little, but soon collected herself, “n…no…. they wouldn’t! they…”
As if unsure of herself, she mumbled. “Would they?”
“What happened…?”, my curiosity got the better of me even though I knew it was a little sensitive.
“I…I escaped. I left without saying anything. I… I mean there were children in the base, so I can’t- “
“Are we really not humans anymore?”
She raised her head. “What?”
“We! It’s not our fault we were bitten! And we are still humans! You are! I am! But they treat us like dead people, or worse, zombies! They...they try to kill us, after all the time we’ve spent together!! We- “
“It’s incurable. Now we are humans, but when the infection reaches the head, we will become the walking dead. There’s- “
“Nothing we can do? That’s bullshit! I…I…”
Tears came rolling down my eyes. “I’ve so much to live for!”
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(5)
54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9DZULkLv0
After a while the bleeding had stopped. And the tears dried. We silently sat next to each other, well rather awkwardly after the little tantrum I threw.
“Umm….”, I mumbled a while. It’s a bad habit of mine, that I can’t stand such awkward silence.
But how do you talk to a girl again?
“Umm…hey!”
“Ya…?”
“Um…. what do you do?”
Instantly regretted that dumb of a question. After all the while she talked about being a doctor. I’m really cooked.
“Umm…sorry! You said you were a doctor! Umm…”
“Yeah...no. actually, I’m a 4th year student at the medical college.”
“Oo…oh??”
“Practically a doctor, you know? But I needed to pass the exam in 2 months and I would have been a fully-fledged doctor! And then I can…I….”
A silent tear rolled down her cheeks.
“Umm…sorry, I didn’t want to make this depressing…I- “
“Can’t make it any more depressing than it already is.”
“Don’t worry about that. You have the right to cry, you know?”
“Huh?”
“They always want us to swallow up it all! Zombie apocalypse? Stay strong! Don’t cry about a lost coin collection you spent your entire life or the dream job you were supposed to get next month after a gruelling struggle of the last 10 years of your life! Think of what others lost! Like fuck I care about that?”
“Wha…what are you trying to say?”
“Like we aren’t people anymore! Give up on this! On that! And then, your life! Like, josh, you need to kill yourself! You aren’t human anymore! Like- “
I suddenly realized how dumb shit I was shouting out. No wonder she had felt completely silent…
But they aren’t wrong though. We aren’t humans anymore.
“Say what! Don’t say you don’t want to live! You could’ve killed yourself but you didn’t! doesn’t that mean you wanna live? Just cause- “
“Delaying the inevitable. Just that.”
“There...there must be a way!”
“There isn’t- “
“How can you be so sure? How can you GIVE UP SO EASILY? Why- “
“CAUSE THERE’S NO OTHER WAY!”
Her shout echoed throughout the store. “You think if there was, this will happen? When I stoned the 12 or so kid along with her mother when they tried to forcefully enter the hospital, what did I tell myself? When my friend of 3 years cried “please don’t leave me alone!” why did I close my ears off and ran with people I barely knew? Isn’t it cause I told myself they can’t be saved? That the bitten are damned?!...I…have you never faced such a situation? Have your loved ones not bitten? Did they turn into zombies or not? Didn’t we do the same to them as us now?”
“Yeah, that maybe true…but…”
“But what? How can we expect something else? Everyone has the right to live and we can’t- “
“We have it too! We have the right to live too! Why only them? Why- “
“We are already dead”, she said in a low yet chilling voice, “we are- “
“ALIVE!! I Lost it. WE ARE VERY DAMN MUCH ALIVE.”
“Oh yeah? then…”, her voice was chilling, wisphers felt like screams that pierced my skin, “aren’t they attracted to loud noises? If we are humans, they will come for us! We are shouting so loudly, so they should come right? Where ARE they?”
“They…they- “
A loud noise of a container falling snapped us out.
“What the hell?” She flashed her torch in that direction.
An undead child was standing by the shelves at the entrance. Its hollow red eyes straight at us, as if the darkness inside them would drown us.
It didn’t run towards us though.
As it should. As it would.
It turned around and left.
“No…come back…”, it’s as if I whispered my mind, “I’m still human…I- “
“Hey…”, her voice suddenly trembled. She pointed at the darkness and following her sight, a chill ran down my spine.
In the darkness, more than a dozen pair of red hollow eyes glared at us.
The shout must’ve attracted a crowd.
But they didn’t move.
I don’t think since the beginning of it all, I’ve ever wanted a zombie to come eat me more strongly than ever.
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(6)
54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrx3Yo8l934
We didn’t talk for a while. The horde seems to have dissipated back into the darkness. Even so, if they don’t attack, the fear’s still fresh in the back of our mind.
A while later, she suddenly looked at me, and said, “you know, I stoned a four-year-old two days ago.”
“Eh?”
“He was infected. So was his mother. They were amongst a group of survivors whose bus was attacked by a horde of zombies a few metres from the hospital. In front of us all. Just before they could enter the premises.”
Her eyes darkened, and she almost started to babble.
“The bites were still fresh! There’s nothing we could do. Letting them in would’ve done nothing but harm to the patients inside. I…I know that…but…but…” her voice choked, “then they tried forcing their way in! they won’t listen to reason, so we…we had to…”
“It’s ok!” I didn’t know when I almost hugged her, but managing myself I almost shouted, “you had a reason! You- “
“Then what right to live we have now?” Her piercing whisper was like a needle to my heart.
Looking at her eyes, although blurred by tears and slightly reddened due to constant crying, I felt a terrible cold. Her eyes pierced my mask.
Cause she’s right. That’s what I did as well. That’s the right thing to do.
I know it…I know…Ryan wasn’t wrong…but…
I still want to live.
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I closed my eyes for a while. Taking a long breathe, my master at karate classes said this is the best way to calm one’s self down.
“Do…you have asthma?” The girl looked at me oddly. Nah, can’t even breathe without losing rizz.
“No…no! I was just…um…. thinking! you know…what to do next!”
I stood up. “No point getting cooped up in here! Let’s do something!”
“Where’s that coming from?”
“You know”, I faked a smile, “my mom says in these times of hardships, we must enjoy life as well!”
“Ya sure momma’s boy. So, what we gonna do in midst of the apocalypse?”
“Well for one, no one’s gonna attack us! So, let’s go explore!”
“Explore? What are we gonna do- “
“Come on! Don’t you have anything you wanted to do?”
She stood up, unamused. Yet, maybe a little amused.
“Can we have ice cream?”
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