THE DAY I BECAME A PASTOR

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THE DAY I BECAME A "PASTOR" BY ACCIDENT ⛪😂

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A STORY BY

MASIMBA JUNIOR MUTODZA 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qUjaJLkNx

In high school, I was the quiet kid who just wanted to pass Maths and go home.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBvLvkXP5a

Until one Tuesday when the real school pastor didn’t show up for assembly.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTRhp8vIH8q

The headmaster panicked. Looked around. Pointed at me. 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6pat9QvyXm

“You. Yes you. You look holy. Come and preach.”159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMIoMluo2M

Me? Holy? I failed Scripture in Grade 7.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzy13ls3fD3

But 800 students were staring. The prefects pushed me to the front. Someone handed me a mic.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc39TIiDNTk

My brain went blank. So I said the only Bible verse I fully remembered: 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcA1eQGs5Dv

“Jesus wept.” John 11:35.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjg9ziQLWh

Silence.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrPVGaDgkv5

Then I panicked and added: “And on that day, there was no bread in the tuckshop… so we must learn to share.”159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwceDmnPdeS

Some Form 1 kid shouted “Amen!” 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhV4raaVxo

Then the whole school: “AMEEEEN!”159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt9m0gx5KcW

I saw my chance and ran with it. 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPoKHFq6a1

“Touch your neighbor and say: ‘You will pass Maths… if you study.’” 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxr9jTNwKB8

“AMEN!” 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9Pesxb6bp

“Turn to your deskmate and say: ‘Stop eating my freezits.’” 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hBe2Fb81r

“AMEN!”159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAiy6RPPEWR

By the end, the headmaster was clapping. The deputy head gave me a free pie. 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNgIJdDDQMY

For 2 weeks, juniors called me “Papa” and asked me to pray for their crushes.159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XMCPIVjzt

My mother beat me when she found out. “Since when are you a pastor? You don’t even pray before eating!”159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb84YhdpKrF

But to this day, the tuckshop lady still gives me a discount… 159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBE5Y7zmmfl

“Because you are a man of God.” 😭🙏

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ENDS

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WRITTEN BY

MASIMBA JUNIOR MUTODZA

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