時間:2017 年,夏。 地點:太古坊某商業大廈與灣仔某唐樓窄巷。48Please respect copyright.PENANAE3SsSJkKT2
48Please respect copyright.PENANAJ2Y8V2DzvU
28 歲的阿初,剛剛離開了長沙灣那間夕陽物流公司,跳槽來到太古坊。那時的他,依然戇厚得令人髮指。他當時的上司是個典型的「老海鮮」,看準阿初正直不阿,將所有厭惡性工作塞給他,美其名曰「磨練」。阿初以為只要像練八極拳一樣,一拳一腳打得實,工作就能做好,於是每天在辦公室坐到晚上十點,逐個 Excel 儲存格去對。48Please respect copyright.PENANAifAxdqMsQb
48Please respect copyright.PENANAZJy12YWLVE
直到他遇到了談道德。談道德大他幾年,職銜是高級主任,實質是「捉蛇宗師」。他看出阿初這份忠厚像極了當年的自己,決定扶一把。48Please respect copyright.PENANABROA98BeOX
48Please respect copyright.PENANA0k0AnBIjCP
「阿初,你咁樣做嘢,遲早過勞死,重點係——你死咗,條數都係錯嘅。」談道德穿著燙得平整的恤衫,手裡拿著一杯冰塊快融化的凍檸茶少甜,斜靠在阿初位旁,「你呢種叫『笨實』,唔係『實幹』。」48Please respect copyright.PENANAe0rkU7lIDc
48Please respect copyright.PENANAlkt0IjaXvL
「但係談生,師父話做人要踏實……」阿初手裡也拿著一杯同款的凍奶茶少甜。48Please respect copyright.PENANA52giPDmtOk
48Please respect copyright.PENANASiqpLYdced
「停!」談道德做了個切換的手勢,「你師父教你打拳,無教你點喺太古坊生存。嚟,哥哥帶你去見識下咩叫『三不管』地帶。」48Please respect copyright.PENANAUjXvgSsMTE
48Please respect copyright.PENANA9mlbtqHCEf
那天黃昏,談道德帶著阿初翹班,去了灣仔一間招牌燈光曖昧、門面殘舊的骨場。按完腳準備離開時,在窄巷轉角撞上了幾個正在收數的小混混。48Please respect copyright.PENANAMLFWMWXGHx
48Please respect copyright.PENANAHgiOmqVeK1
「喂,四眼仔,望咩望啊?想代佢還債啊?」帶頭的混混推了談道德一把,眼鏡都差點飛脫。談道德正想掏錢消災,阿初突然動了。那時的他還沒修煉出後來那種「社畜隱藏氣場」,上前一步,使出一記「撐錘」。48Please respect copyright.PENANAmN5Il5SDFb
48Please respect copyright.PENANAPdQm7PaWJD
「嘭!」一聲悶響,混混整個人倒飛出去,撞碎了巷口的木製雜物架。阿初沒打面,但他那一記靠勁直接把巷子裡的生銹鐵閘撞出了一個深坑。48Please respect copyright.PENANAsXELSODWR7
48Please respect copyright.PENANAMaJ9H8eZAu
「嘩!大佬!你想拆樓啊?」談道德看傻了眼。阿初還想上前,談道德連忙死命拉住他,「夠啦!收手!呢度灣仔黎架,咁多人,你想驚動警察啊?」48Please respect copyright.PENANAvlUoJXrYrM
48Please respect copyright.PENANAyzlSzULl7Z
談道德扶正眼鏡,一把摟住阿初的肩膀,低聲喝道:「行俠仗義都要睇地頭!打爛嘢要賠錢架,快啲行!」他拖著阿初飛快消失在鬧市中。事後,談道德幫阿初處理了手尾,還教訓他:「以後記住,喺出面打交要講『技術』,即係——打完要無痕跡。我保你,你保我,明唔明?」48Please respect copyright.PENANAg3LdNcLKI8
48Please respect copyright.PENANAGa6nsKdv96
阿初看著這個斯文敗類,第一次發現,人生除了八極的「剛」,還需要談道德這種「油」。48Please respect copyright.PENANAQ8LoMXNhzg
48Please respect copyright.PENANAYnZBQ0Uhe7
2018 年,秋。 地點:中環某 Big 4 會計師樓會議室。48Please respect copyright.PENANAcrJkONXkUU
48Please respect copyright.PENANAQxNQVMBQmS
當阿初在學摸魚時,阿敏正在經歷她的「軒轅台平亂」。她當時帶的那班 A1 實習生,簡直像《射鵰》裡的丐幫,派系林立,互相推諉,自相殘殺。這單 Interim Audit 眼看就要錯過內部 Deadline,Partner 在辦公室急得跳腳。48Please respect copyright.PENANAFlapf8BwNG
48Please respect copyright.PENANAoE8uwtMUz9
阿敏穿著剪裁俐落的西裝裙,手裡捏著一杯凍奶茶少甜。「張生,你負責嘅現金流同李小姐份 Working 差咗五萬蚊,你哋打算互推到幾時?」阿敏推了推金屬眼鏡,語氣平淡如冰。48Please respect copyright.PENANAezIyqSdIwX
48Please respect copyright.PENANAxtB3k4Ztoe
「Ms. Chan,係她個 Data Source……」48Please respect copyright.PENANAK7kKGpxZB5
48Please respect copyright.PENANAeMBfwKkUH5
「我唔聽解釋。」阿敏吸了一口奶茶,「而家係下晝三點。張生,你去對銀行 Statement;李生,你負責重拉個 Excel Model。五點半,我要見到最後份 Summary。如果到時仲見到紅字,你哋今晚就留喺度食 Pizza,我自己返去食牛扒。」48Please respect copyright.PENANAI7VYGfu1Bp
48Please respect copyright.PENANAgTuiEmlxj6
阿敏利用她那套皇太后般的邏輯,強行將混亂的職責切開。到了下午五點十五分,紅字消失了。Partner 驚訝地問:「阿敏,你咁快搞掂?」48Please respect copyright.PENANAR7rmJEu3Jl
48Please respect copyright.PENANAVdLsPYkyh9
「條數啱,點解唔可以收工?」阿敏淡淡回應,轉頭對下屬說,「六點散場。張生,下次買奶茶記得叫佢多冰,呢杯唔夠凍。」48Please respect copyright.PENANAkqpqlX0645
48Please respect copyright.PENANA1GVllSsQWR
這才是「打勝仗」。如果做到凌晨三點,那是被工作強姦,慘過被甄志丙污辱的小龍女。真正的皇太后,是讓工作在規定的時間內臣服,然後騰出空檔,偷偷在電腦屏幕的陰影下,刷一刷網上流行的首飾品牌。48Please respect copyright.PENANAgTLcvtt2sS
48Please respect copyright.PENANAPhasKMYeJr
2019 年,某週末。鯉景灣家中。48Please respect copyright.PENANAkpgHlOoyDU
48Please respect copyright.PENANA47jSR7I3CF
那天晚上,阿初帶了談道德推薦的甜品回家。阿敏換上了柔軟的居家服,盤算著按揭和軒仔的儲備金。48Please respect copyright.PENANAaI2Tu08RLV
48Please respect copyright.PENANAXPHhtgwsXs
「老公,條數好似差少少喎……」48Please respect copyright.PENANAL0drCp4wDS
48Please respect copyright.PENANAL6Zy5K8GmX
阿初熟練地用八極的勁道幫她揉捏著肩膀,勁力剛柔並濟:「唔使驚,談生教咗我點樣喺下一單 Project 申請多啲津貼,我頂得住。」48Please respect copyright.PENANAneTRD3YKLj
48Please respect copyright.PENANA4Sz7lMwmzl
阿敏靠在他懷裡:「阿初,你有無覺得,我哋變咗好多?」48Please respect copyright.PENANACp2HsMG1YC
48Please respect copyright.PENANAZarZPyA8K4
「變咗咪好囉。」阿初傻笑道,「談生話,長大就係要學識喺森林入面搵食。我哋努力啲,軒仔將來先可以住得舒服啲。」48Please respect copyright.PENANAO8FxeHd8oi
48Please respect copyright.PENANA1HroEUOOh7
「小確幸」是有前設的。前設是阿初在太古坊學會了談道德式的職場博弈;前設是阿敏在中環壓服了那群丐幫子弟,換取了合規摸魚的空間。他們是在這森林裡,一邊修煉「生存神功」,一邊守護著名為「家」的寸土。48Please respect copyright.PENANAEt4ddyp3Cn
48Please respect copyright.PENANAWQGN0uISLz
阿初嘿嘿一笑,掏出一份「三不管」地帶骨場優惠券:「老婆,下次一齊去按腳?純按腳㗎!談生話呢間個師傅手勢好過佢!」48Please respect copyright.PENANAAY3CAMhDnG
48Please respect copyright.PENANA6CQqH79rhc
阿敏斜了他一眼,搶過優惠券:「條數啱喇。聽日去。」48Please respect copyright.PENANA3SpmvVbqDp
48Please respect copyright.PENANAXu5OxbWciZ
【編劇夥伴吐糟】48Please respect copyright.PENANAFTbZ4xJO9D
談道德的「反向育才」:談道德真係阿初生命中嘅貴人。佢唔係教阿初做一個「好員工」,而係教佢點樣喺惡劣嘅制度入面做一個「生存者」。尤其係嗰句「行俠仗義都要睇地頭」,簡直係社畜嘅保命符。48Please respect copyright.PENANAjmirHPrTwe
48Please respect copyright.PENANANYKvWre1Tq
阿敏與丐幫 A1:諗返起班 A1 為咗刷 KPI 互片嘅畫面,再對比阿敏淡定飲凍奶茶分派工作,呢個「丐幫幫主」真係當之無愧。小龍女嗰段對比真係神來之筆,工作唔係要做得耐,係要令佢「臣服」。48Please respect copyright.PENANAbJGgsp4w8q
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我們都不是英雄
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ISSUE #83
歲月裡的腰骨與誓言(下)
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