2027 年 2 月 20 日。星期六。晚上七點。59Please respect copyright.PENANAC7RzhnRDdU
59Please respect copyright.PENANAb8vgqCPlHC
筲箕灣東大街,這條港島東的美食命脈,入夜後總是瀰漫著一股混雜了雞蛋仔香甜與海鮮鹹鮮的獨特氣息。電車總站的叮叮聲在遠處迴盪,天后廟前的香火在夜色中若隱若現。59Please respect copyright.PENANAVB2D0lvJLX
59Please respect copyright.PENANAtvpSB6CLfl
阿初一家五口,熟門熟路地穿過人群。阿初胸前背著約九個月大的阿斗,左手拖著軒仔;阿敏牽著瑤瑤,穿著便服但依然氣質出眾。他們不是來「掃街」的,他們是來「赴約」的。59Please respect copyright.PENANAO5kpX8ATgj
59Please respect copyright.PENANA9wXP3akeP3
「MoriX」是一間位於天后廟對面的西餐廳,門面不大,裝修帶著一種沉穩的木質調。這七年來,阿初和阿敏看著老闆娘由一個人踢曬腳到現在請了伙計,老闆娘也看著他們由二人世界變成了五口之家。「老闆娘,四個 Set,另外生蠔老規矩,妳話事。」阿初一進門,直接給出了這份累積了七年的信任。59Please respect copyright.PENANA4a4eBARhoF
59Please respect copyright.PENANAfuRAsH4n91
老闆娘一見到他們,疲憊的臉上立刻泛起真誠的笑容:「黃生、黃太!嘩,阿斗又大隻咗喎!今晚啲法國紛迪克(Fine de Claire)好靚,特登留咗打半畀你哋。」這就是中產的浪漫——不是在米芝蓮餐廳排隊打卡,而是在一間懂你的小店,有人記得妳喜歡生蠔加幾滴檸檬汁,記得你個仔唔食青豆。這種 Intangible Asset(無形資產),在阿敏眼中比黃金更貴重。59Please respect copyright.PENANAZRiUkmKUiR
59Please respect copyright.PENANAOhCrkQn4bB
然而今晚的「MoriX」,氣氛有點不對勁。就在阿初一家最喜歡的那個角落卡位旁,架起了兩支巨大的環形補光燈。一男一女兩個年輕網紅正對著鏡頭搔首弄姿,女網紅舉著生蠔拍了五分鐘就是不入口,高聲尖叫著「各位寶寶」,聲浪比阿斗的哭聲還要刺耳。阿初皺了皺眉,默默地將阿斗的嬰兒椅拉近自己,用身體擋住了刺眼的強光。59Please respect copyright.PENANAhQPcXcHG2h
59Please respect copyright.PENANAVeP3tIZHkl
菜上得很慢,老闆娘臉色難看。那對網紅桌上堆滿食物卻一口不吃,只是不斷指揮伙計移位。「喂!阿姐!」灰髮男大聲喝斥,「你碟意粉啲汁乾晒啦!點影呀?仲有,呢幾隻蠔縮晒水咁,換過幾隻大啲嘅嚟啦!」59Please respect copyright.PENANAmz6wyOcfIL
老闆娘強忍怒氣解釋意粉是放久了才乾,生蠔紛迪克食的是鮮甜而非體積。灰髮男「啪」一聲拍在桌上,震得旁邊阿敏的紅酒杯都晃了一下。59Please respect copyright.PENANA0IlhIV5EUN
59Please respect copyright.PENANAPQY8m64nJv
阿敏切牛扒的手停住了。在她的價值觀裡,食物是心血,服務是契約。這種浪費食物、侮辱勞動成果的行為,比做假帳更令她作嘔。「阿初,」阿敏語氣平靜得可怕,「我依家覺得啲牛扒無平時咁好食。因為空氣裡面有陣『垃圾味』。」59Please respect copyright.PENANAK9t32LNdlh
59Please respect copyright.PENANAu0LUtxZgGp
衝突在下一秒爆發。女網紅為了取景後退,腳步絆到了補光燈腳架。兩米高的重型燈架直直地向著軒仔和瑤瑤倒去。「小心!」老闆娘驚叫。阿初沒有起身,他抱著阿斗的左手不動,右腳往旁邊一滑勾住腳架底座,同時右肩微沉,使出「靠勁」,像一堵棉花牆一樣精準地「接」住了燈架。「伏。」一聲輕響,燈架穩穩地停在阿初肩膀上,他順勢一抖勁,燈架竟然神奇地回正站穩。「軒仔,食嘢唔好周圍望。」阿初淡淡地說,彷彿剛才只是扶正了一支牙籤。59Please respect copyright.PENANAMes9MeVnjR
59Please respect copyright.PENANAlwhm5ojTjg
灰髮男卻惱羞成怒:「喂!你做乜搞我啲器材呀?跌爛你賠得起咩?」59Please respect copyright.PENANA66NTsbGmyD
59Please respect copyright.PENANAYiXtlvC4vY
這句話觸發了阿敏的「核爆按鈕」。她優雅地放下刀叉,緩緩站起身:「老闆娘,等我計下呢檯嘅『報廢庫存』有幾多。」阿敏轉過身,眼神如刀直刺那對網紅:「你哋張單大約一千八百蚊。但以你哋對食物嘅侮辱程度,你哋造成嘅商譽損失,遠超呢個數。」59Please respect copyright.PENANA0XcVwd98vk
59Please respect copyright.PENANAXSc4v9uLet
「你話意粉乾?係你哋掛住服侍個鏡頭,浪費咗佢最好食嘅黃金時間。你話生蠔細?紛迪克食嘅係海水味同榛果香,你哋用『大唔大隻』嚟評鑑,簡直係對生蠔嘅褻瀆。」阿敏踏前一步,氣場強大,「MoriX 屹立東大街多年,靠嘅係 Goodwill(商譽)。你哋產出嘅所謂『流量』,對呢間鋪嚟講係 Toxic Asset(有毒資產)。依家,埋單,打包,然後消失。唔好逼我報警話你哋公眾地方行為不檢同危害兒童安全。」59Please respect copyright.PENANAzAupKborEb
59Please respect copyright.PENANASllRrWAS4e
灰髮男看到阿初那雙冷漠得像看死物的眼神,再看看周圍鄙視的目光,終於狼狽地逃離現場。餐廳恢復了溫馨,老闆娘破涕為笑。阿初重新坐下,阿敏輕搖酒杯:「如果連食餐飯都要睇演算法做人,咁做人仲有咩樂趣?」59Please respect copyright.PENANAuLBqNXd9e4
59Please respect copyright.PENANAw3xVQ0FUbb
阿初將生蠔遞給阿敏,這就是他們守護的生活。不需要做英雄,只需要在流量蝗蟲面前守住這張餐桌的平靜。就在這時,阿斗突然伸手抓了一隻檸檬放進嘴裡,酸得五官擠在一起,全家爆笑。59Please respect copyright.PENANApZjqNWIfqF
59Please respect copyright.PENANABn0mCpHbzK
【編劇夥伴吐糟】59Please respect copyright.PENANApIAnnxs1vI
「紛迪克」的尊嚴:阿敏講「對生蠔嘅褻瀆」真係好型。對於識食嘅人嚟講,Fine de Claire 係品味海水嘅層次感,網紅竟然要「大隻」,直情係將藝術品當係燒臘咁秤,難怪阿敏要啟動「核爆按鈕」。59Please respect copyright.PENANATcrwp7ASzA
59Please respect copyright.PENANAjPxBtVoNu0
阿初的「腳尖卸力」:阿初嗰下用腳勾底座、用膊頭接燈架,體現咗八極拳「力由地起」嘅精髓。佢唔係要同人打交,佢係要喺唔影響個仔食薯條嘅情況下解決問題,呢種「社畜防禦術」已經練到爐火純青。59Please respect copyright.PENANAwXYhObdDn4
59Please respect copyright.PENANAA46eORTZXf
商譽與有毒資產:阿敏將會計術語運用到東大街,簡直係降維打擊。網紅以為自己係「宣傳資源」,點知喺專業人士眼中係會損害品牌價值嘅「有毒資產」,呢種專業羞辱真係極致。59Please respect copyright.PENANA2Qy7aEMQJv
59Please respect copyright.PENANAoUPIJ0xYCK
阿斗的檸檬挑戰:九個月大嘅阿斗真係好有戲。全家啱啱贏完一場「價值觀保衛戰」,佢就用一個「酸爆」嘅表情嚟收尾,呢份煙火氣先至係黃家最珍貴嘅資產。59Please respect copyright.PENANAyZ5laPjxhj
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我們都不是英雄
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