2027 年 9 月 10 日(星期五),秋分將至,微涼,適合食花生有些事情,當事人往往是最後一個知道的。比如阿初。62Please respect copyright.PENANA8BL616xxR3
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距離那個「斷片之夜」已經過了一星期。這一週,阿初過得膽戰心驚。他依稀記得自己喝多了,好像還在街上發了酒瘋,但具體細節就像被強行格式化的硬碟,只剩下一些破碎的、帶著馬賽克的殘影。62Please respect copyright.PENANAPxcFXLv1Nb
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殘影一:好像推開了一些很嘈吵的人。62Please respect copyright.PENANAd1e0Gc3Yr7
殘影二:好像抱住了一個很軟、很香的人。62Please respect copyright.PENANAv6iVAeGMxh
殘影三:那個很軟的人,好像……主動親了他一下?62Please respect copyright.PENANAE6g37QeS4v
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「無理由嘅,一定係發春夢。」阿初坐在太古坊辦公室的電腦前,試圖用物流數據來壓抑內心的躁動。62Please respect copyright.PENANAFNM8vEM8UL
如果是真的,皇太后這一週應該會拿這件事來恥笑他,或者作為談判籌碼。但阿敏沒有。她異常平靜,平靜得像是在審核一份完全合規的財務報表,連一句「以後唔准飲酒」都無講,只是默默地將他那套沾了灰的西裝拿去了乾洗。這種平靜,反而讓阿初更慌。62Please respect copyright.PENANAbEbWDyFOCs
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下午 1:15 地點,太古坊某茶餐廳。62Please respect copyright.PENANAmLvw3ZHZ0x
62Please respect copyright.PENANAz9xSB179Sh
「喂,阿初,你有無睇今日個熱搜?」談道德咬了一口西多士,將手機屏幕轉過來,眼神裡帶著一種男人之間「我明你,但我唔講破」的狡黠。62Please respect copyright.PENANA1I9i6PjoiT
62Please respect copyright.PENANALTVEh1Hl43
屏幕上是《東張西望》的預告片段,標題聳動:《北角深宵驚現掃地僧!神秘西裝男單挑街霸?》62Please respect copyright.PENANAdqKbV6i9eE
62Please respect copyright.PENANAUGJgmX9gOC
畫面很晃,顯然是遠距離偷拍。鏡頭裡,昏暗的春秧街後巷,幾個爛仔正在叫囂。突然,一個穿著深藍色廉價西裝的背影入鏡。看不清樣貌,只見那個背影腳步浮浮,但每當爛仔衝過來,那個背影只是輕輕一靠、或者隨手一撥,爛仔就像撞到牆一樣彈開。62Please respect copyright.PENANAo3U8DhQE1Q
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「條片我有睇,網上瘋傳,話係『北角葉問』嘛。」阿初沒好氣地扒了一口飯,「關我咩事?」62Please respect copyright.PENANA2xbaK2Ray4
62Please respect copyright.PENANAH8WwW5pkC6
談道德收回手機,切了一塊牛油,語氣輕鬆得像在講天氣:「係唔關事,不過算啦,條片影唔到樣,當係個天幫某啲醉酒佬積下陰德囉。如果俾人起到底,隨時俾人告公眾地方行為不檢就無謂啦,係咪?」他喝了一口茶,補了一句:「不過講真,果套深藍色 Uniqlo 西裝,全香港真係好多人用㗎。」62Please respect copyright.PENANAY34YzTfHOD
62Please respect copyright.PENANAw0BwAQifCa
阿初背脊流了一滴冷汗。這死佬,果然知,只是留了個白。62Please respect copyright.PENANAoRIraoVAhQ
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晚上 7:00 地點,春秧街沈姐舊樓樓下。62Please respect copyright.PENANANIQUNTLC8V
62Please respect copyright.PENANAB5dOS2fada
沈姐見到阿初,上下打量了他一番,眼神犀利得像 X 光機。62Please respect copyright.PENANABARLthAKKT
62Please respect copyright.PENANAnHIBjozxVf
「馬步浮,下盤虛。」沈姐嘖了一聲,搖了搖頭,「上次教你『閻王三點手』,是用指節點人穴位,唔係叫你用手掌去抹窗咁抹人塊面。雖然對方係垃圾,但你出手咁肉酸,行出去唔好話係我沈姐嘅徒弟。」62Please respect copyright.PENANAgxU27lGuiM
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阿初愣在原地:「師父,你講緊咩?」62Please respect copyright.PENANAByGpPjxZWf
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「仲扮?」沈姐白了他一眼,「雖然打得難睇,但算你有少少腰骨。不過記住,遇著真正行家嘅,拳只會俾人打死。返去練多兩次樁啦,廢柴。」62Please respect copyright.PENANAoTvqn5MPW6
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阿初抱著書包,看著沈姐轉身上樓。難道那天晚上的「垃圾」,真的是人?62Please respect copyright.PENANApB2uAeotmw
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晚上 7:35 地點,北角丹拿花園.客廳。62Please respect copyright.PENANAH6NTmmiUOE
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電視正播著《東張西望》。阿敏剛洗完澡,穿著一套淡灰色的家居服。阿初將切好的橙遞給阿敏,眼神不自覺地在她唇上停留了一秒。62Please respect copyright.PENANAi3gEj9BCdt
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「望咩呀?我有橙皮?」阿敏淡淡地瞥了他一眼。 「無……無呀。」阿初連忙坐下。62Please respect copyright.PENANAryp9AdYsnO
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電視上,外景主持 Baby 正用一種極度誇張、陰陽怪氣的調侃語調旁述:「嘩!大家睇下!條片近日網上瘋傳呀!北角春秧街驚現『醉拳甘迺迪』?個西裝阿叔腳步浮浮,但揮一揮手,班紋身大漢就全部跌晒落地!究竟係內功深厚,定係這班人演技太好想碰瓷呢?」62Please respect copyright.PENANAhH5fhwyeIe
62Please respect copyright.PENANA1VAojrWUeO
畫面切換,正是那天晚上的模糊片段。阿初在電視反光的倒影裡,看到了自己現在穿著的睡衣,再想想衣櫃裡那套掛著「除臭處理」標籤的西裝。62Please respect copyright.PENANAtfg2o0RFEB
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「個男人……個背影好似幾熟面口喎。」阿敏突然開口,語氣平淡,眼睛盯著電視,嘴角卻微微勾起一抹極難察覺的弧度。62Please respect copyright.PENANATtfIZ10K5f
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「呃……係、係咩?可能係大眾臉掛。」阿初乾笑兩聲。62Please respect copyright.PENANA1caimyPl4l
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「嗯。」阿敏點點頭,轉過頭看著阿初,眼神裡帶著三分笑意與看破不說破的溫柔,「不過這個社畜都幾好嘢,飲醉咗都識得自動導航返屋企,仲識得幫手倒垃圾。雖然姿勢難睇啲,但總算無整污糟件衫。」62Please respect copyright.PENANAeFK70Aw1FG
62Please respect copyright.PENANAtkkJDWUMjS
阿初瞬間破防。她全都知道了。62Please respect copyright.PENANAjRPbiET8U5
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「老婆,我……」 62Please respect copyright.PENANA2SD7MeOg5k
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「食橙啦。」阿敏將一瓣橙塞進阿初嘴裡,堵住了他的解釋,「過去咗嘅野無謂提。總之,下次再飲到咁醉,就唔係乾洗費咁簡單。」62Please respect copyright.PENANA6VufUIfeUR
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阿初嚼著那瓣橙,甜的。他肯定那晚的吻是真的,因為甜味一模一樣。62Please respect copyright.PENANAV9AuluErOG
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這時,電視上的 Baby 表情瞬間從嘲諷切換成一種聞到血腥味的興奮:「不過!原來我地攝製隊深入調查之後,發現班紋身大漢背後,竟然牽涉到東區某個政府部門重建項目!懷疑有官員隻手遮天!即刻帶大家去睇下這份獨家猛料——《東區重建背後無形黑手》!」62Please respect copyright.PENANA5GjjuLEgfG
62Please respect copyright.PENANAjbkAu0q9oj
預告片中,林 Patrick 那個一臉官腔的模糊鏡頭一閃而過。字幕打出:【官商勾結?居民聲淚俱下!】62Please respect copyright.PENANA1prshXfSIs
阿敏抽了一張紙巾,優雅地擦了擦手,眼神冷得像看著一隻剛被噴了殺蟲水的曱甴。「哦,終於要做專題啦?」她語氣輕鬆得像在挑選週末電影,「睇下今晚有無野好笑先。」62Please respect copyright.PENANA2Af7LkDQyl
62Please respect copyright.PENANAJLhgohjzHh
阿初看著老婆的側臉。比起他這個「掃地僧」,身邊這位只需按幾下鍵盤就能清理門戶的皇太后,才是真正的武林高手。62Please respect copyright.PENANAMRVn0X208E
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「老婆。」62Please respect copyright.PENANAcQh2vIn3GE
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「嗯?」62Please respect copyright.PENANAmFqYFAguRY
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「今晚……我想食多個橙。」 阿敏白了他一眼,卻將果盤推了過去。 「食啦,廢柴。」62Please respect copyright.PENANAByO19lF642
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【編劇夥伴吐糟】62Please respect copyright.PENANAGfxXu9GpXq
談道德嘅「職場修養」:談道德唔直接講穿,反而顯得佢高層次,果句「深藍色 Uniqlo 西裝好多人用」簡直係神來之筆,畀足面阿初,但又話你知「我咩都知」。呢種兄弟情先至係成年人嘅浪漫。62Please respect copyright.PENANA68p54yo49Y
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沈姐嘅「專業評價」:沈姐點評太有畫面感。佢唔係讚阿初救人,而係嫌佢出手「肉酸」。呢種對武學嘅執著,反而側面證實咗阿初果晚真係大發神威。62Please respect copyright.PENANAV2NOVUPfRx
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我們都不是英雄
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