Bob Oxinsink, an outgoing introvert, was trying nonchalantly to act naturally, standing at the front end of the bar alone in the crowd, his plastic glass fully empty, the consumed non-alcoholic beer down to the last big sip nearly perfect. He felt bittersweet at this class reunion: forgotten memories of so long ago, some pretty ugly, some seriously funny, some painfully beautiful. His sad smile revealed a melancholy joy in remembering his youth of 50 years past as he surveyed the small mass of now elderly juveniles milling about.
“Mabe it was foolish wisdom that I came to this dismal celebration since I was mostly treated with a cruel kindness by the rest of my classmates way back then,” he whispered loudly to himself, “but then I thought maybe the strangely familiar faces have lost their intense apathy they felt for me after half a century and might remember me. Yet here I am alone in deafening silence just like the bright night of graduation day.” Bob sighed lightly and slowly made haste to the buffet table. Maybe someone who is not clearly confused will recognize him there.
Bob’s arm lunged slowly for a plate and plastic silverware from the paper tablecloth and casually contemplated the crowded spread. He was definitely undecided what to eat: the boneless ribs were a sure maybe, but the jumbo shrimp, vegetarian meatballs and vegan bacon also looked awfully good as well if they were heavily sprinkled with salt and white pepper; however the fresh frozen veggies looked deliciously unappetizing, especially the mild jalapeño peppers and sweet pickles. He almost definitely kind of desired a square of the twelve-ounce pound cake and an isosceles of lo-fat cheesecake. 267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbi5APezvA
Next in line to him was much older looking Suzy Hatfield, so he asked for her unbiased opinion of what looked tasty. She ignored him just like she did in high school, but Suzy was always passive-aggressive, making him feel clearly invisible even while meandering through the hallways like ants back then. Today’s current history was old news. He received the same indifference from a bald and bony Paul McDonald from ahead of him, who looked to be in pretty poor health. The sound of silence after asking the old boy’s opinion about the fried ice cream made Bob feel as if he was as living dead as Paul looked. He was sandwiched a foot apart between a tough love ex-Marine drill sergeant and a devout atheist as Suzy let everybody know, and was ignored by both, as he almost always was in this waking dream called life. It would take an eternal lifetime to try to figure out why so many folks he came in contact with ignored his invisible presence.
A soft rock song suddenly blasted mellowly from the silent speakers; the lights darkened. In his idle restlessness Bob, hopelessly optimistic, asked Mary Clayton, still looking bad in her tight slacks, for a quick slow dance, but she was sharply blunt in her negative reply delivered with an unfriendly smile. It was another deep scratch to his self-deprecating ego. His sweet agony was prolonged a bit longer–a larger half of himself thought coming here was mad wisdom, his shaky confidence falling as fast as a rock balloon. His unbiased opinion was that he would celebrate another somnolent jubilee with the classmates never again!
Finally he could no longer hold back a silent scream. He was clearly in a mental fog, heading feet first for a crash landing. His unconscious awareness got the best of him. He climbed onto a table top and with a cool passion and an overbearing modesty, shouted meekly to the deeply superficial alums: “I graduated with all you buttheads. Probably your most remembered forgotten classmate. Hello it's me Oxy, morons!”
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FYI: The word "oxymoron" is itself an oxymoron, derived from the Greek oksús ("sharp") and mōros ("dull" or "foolish").
Oxymorons have been used since the days of the ancient Greek poets. William Shakespeare wove them throughout his plays, poems, and sonnets. In Romeo and Juliet, Act 1, Scene 1, he used 13 of them:
O brawling love! O loving hate!
O anything of nothing first create!
O heavy lightness, serious vanity!
Misshapen chaos of well-seeming forms!
Feather of lead, bright smoke, cold fire, sick health!
Still-waking sleep, that is not what it is!
This love feel I, that feel no love in this.
A mere abundance.
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and then Add to home screen.