《一腳踏淪船》 - [Day 06－姐姐計劃] PART 01

朦朦朧朧...朦朦朧朧...409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEd4peQCNV5

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半睡半醒咁...半睡半醒咁...

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間房仲係有啲黑...唔算有好多光透到入嚟...

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天仲係黑？好似黎明？

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我又唔多願睜開雙眼...但又瞓唔返咁...

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閉起雙眼喺床上碌...碌完左...碌埋右...

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間房好似越嚟越藍...越嚟越藍...真係黎明來到？

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我都係瞓唔返...只好攤喺床上諗諗...放空又諗諗...

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個人越嚟越有意識...開始清醒...然後...睜開雙眼...望住熟識嘅天花板...

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點解會喺鬧鐘未響之前就已經醒咗？

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係尋晚早咗瞓？

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唔係...都係好似平時咁...

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係尋晚好瞓咗？

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都唔係...亦都係好似平時咁...

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咁點解好以瞓得咁差咁？

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的確係有啲差...熟睡唔到...

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你話多夢發都還好...起碼叫做可以喺夢中逃避吓現實...

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但就連夢都冇發過...單純係好醒瞓...

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係唔係呢幾日瞓得太多？

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痴線啦返咗四日學邊會有得瞓多㗎？

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咁係唔係因為太多嘢諗？

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有咩嘢諗？又冇咩好諗...

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不過往往就係咁...有啲諗嘢係你冇諗冇諗...原來不知不覺一直都諗緊...

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而家幾點？

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我轉個身喺床頭拎返部電話...睇睇...真係好早...

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時間尚早之下...我又打開個IG睇睇...

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係由幾時開始...我又有一得閒就走去碌IG嘅習慣？

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又可唔可以話已經變成習慣？

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應該都未算...都未去到唔碌唔自在...

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我開IG都唔係真係碌...純粹係打返開個DM...睇吓任Sir有冇Send啲乜過嚟...

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冇錯吖～自從生日之後，呢兩三日都有同任Sir DM。

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啲內容係乜？其實又冇乜特別咋喎...

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好似尋晚瞓之前佢就提我今日要帶乜帶乜...要收咩工課...

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之前又有提我默書嘅範圍唔好記錯...

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又有叫我返校去佢簿櫃拎咗啲簿返上去派咁囉...

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其實呢啲嘢都有喺班Group度講過...唔知點解佢又會DM我再提多我一次...

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可能唔放心掛～我呢個科長唔太有責任感掛～

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咁都冇所謂嘅～我又唔係真係一個好有責任心嘅學生～

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都話咗科長唔啱我做㗎啦～

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不過可能仲係開學頭一個月啦～冇咁快炒我～俾多啲機會我為班付出掛～

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唉是旦啦～反正而家又唔係咁忙...做住先囉～

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做到頂唔住勁多甩漏任Sir自然會換走我㗎啦～

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咁除咗講學校啲嘢，仲有冇其他？

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都有嘅...都有講吓其他嘢咁嘅...

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其他啲乜？關於啲乜？

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好似話...任Sir都有問過“你會唔會再更IG？會唔會再Post返Story同相㗎？”...

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其實任Sir未問之前，我都有諗過...

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我係唔係冇嘢好更呢？

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即係連生日都冇Post返啲相上IG...又冇出Story...淨係將Crystal同Elsie Send俾我嘅相Save喺電話裡面...

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會唔會怕唔見？

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咁又唔怕...我有做Backup嘅～

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我好自立㗎喇～呢啲嘢自己識做自己做㗎喇～

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咁同Post上IG冇抵觸㗎喎～

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係...的確係冇抵觸嘅...之但係...我都仲係未準備好...

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要準備啲乜？

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呃......就好似話突然更新返IG，會有人講閒話...

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有咩人會咁無聊咁都要講閒話？

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呢個世界真係有好多無聊人...尤其係喺網絡上...

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即係之前都有唔少YouTuber或者YouTube Channel爆咗鑊...好似話咩金錢糾紛吖～偷食人夫吖～殺人放火吖～要摺返一排～

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當風聲好似過咗喇，又會放片出嚟試試水溫咁嘅～

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但呢啲仆咗街嘅YouTuber或者YouTube Channel邊有咁易翻到身吖～

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啲Hater一見佢哋露出半個龜頭，就立即狙擊佢哋！

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又話咁快就出返嚟呃錢喇？唔好以為過咗幾個月幾年幾世就冇件事吖！俾返個公道人未吖？食完肥仔唔夠飽，今次又想食邊個？

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唔講仲以為啲Hater係受害者之一～

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不過呢個世界就係咁～睇人仆街最開心～

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點解我咁清楚？因為我都係仆街嗰個～

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即係普遍人認為我哋呢啲女仔係受害者姐...但事實真係咁普遍咩？

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更普遍嘅人會認為我哋係見到靚仔就盅個頭埋去...淫娃蕩婦臭雞有男朋友仲走去一腳踏兩船抵你俾人玩到爛！自己攞嚟賤！抵撚死！

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無可否認...我自己都認同佢哋所講...甚至更甚...

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好多時我都只係唔敢去面對...唔敢去面對...

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但唔面對就唔使面對？逃避又可以逃避到幾時？

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我都唔知...只有避得一時得一時...逃得一世得一世...

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咁咪Del晒啲人再轉埋Private咪得囉～

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咁又唔可以Del晒...始終都有唔少係識得嘅...

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咁淨係Del啲唔識嘅？

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又太多喇...要逐個睇都要花上好多好多時間...仲要確保唔好Del錯啲識嘅...一陣誤會你唔鍾意佢唔妥佢就更加麻煩...

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咁開個新Account咪得囉～

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我又唔想開新Account...我唔想放低呢個Account...我想延續落去...將過去一直延續落去...

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好麻煩吖呵？係吖～女人就係咁麻煩㗎喇～

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所以都係遲啲先算啦～

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而任Sir見我覆佢“遲啲先算”，佢就覆返我“好可惜”...

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好可惜？可惜啲咩呢？

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望住部手機...Mon裡面任Sir句“好可惜”...

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好可惜...好可惜...有乜咁可惜？

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睇咗咁耐...諗咗咁耐...都係唔多明任Sir嘅意思...

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“很感激喜歡我十年仍不休”

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諗到平時個鬧鐘響...

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“近日舊同學說我已耿耿於你心六百週”

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我撳返熄個鬧鐘...

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再坐喺床上繼續諗...諗多一陣...

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然後就落床梳洗...

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對住塊鏡刷牙...望住鏡中嘅自己...又喺度諗...

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其實算唔算得上可惜呢？

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青春嘅時間好短暫...想留都留唔住...唯有留下倩影...

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冇Post IG之後，我的確影少咗好多相...

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就算有影，都係Crystal同我影...

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雖然都有Send返俾我～不過真係影得唔多...

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假如好似而家咁...青春流逝而不留痕跡...會唔會太過可惜？

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邊諗邊梳洗...比起平時都手腳慢啲...

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唔覺唔覺連換校服都慢手慢腳咁...

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手腳慢都唔緊要～最緊要都係Check清楚有冇帶齊嘢啦～

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尋晚任Sir提過我㗎喇～假如我咁都帶漏嘅話就實俾人話啦！

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Check清楚晒確保帶齊晒嘢～著埋對婆仔鞋出門口～

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就好似平時一樣等𨋢～不過今日好似等得耐咗...

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而入到𨋢後，又好似多人咗咁...

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好彩又未滿～又唔算太迫～

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然後落多兩層...又停低...

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𨋢門打開之後...係有個...男同學？

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點解叫男同學？因為係著住我哋學校套校服嘅～

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個男同學望一望我...好似有啲錯愕咁...

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或者係因為部𨋢冇乜位？又或者係平時都唔會遇到我？

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冇錯！我之前都冇遇過呢個男同學嘅！

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或者係因為今日遲咗出門口啦～同平時嘅時間唔同啦～所以遇到嘅人都唔一樣啦～

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我就讓多少少位俾個男同學...

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個男同學就低住頭咁行入嚟...背住我企喺我前面...

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閂埋𨋢門後，我見個男同學都矮我半個頭...再加上頭先睇佢個樣好生面口...又有啲稚氣...係啱啱升中嘅中一生？

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或者係啦～

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不過而家啲中一生又幾得意可愛～仲有少少靚仔添㗎喎～

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難得我哋學校有靚仔吖～係唔知啱唔啱Crystal胃口姐～

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唔知Crystal見到呢個同學仔會唔會飛擒大咬呢？

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唔知喇唔知喇～我淨係知當我哋部𨋢一落到樓下大堂，同學仔就急急腳咁行咗去～

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咁急趕住返學？

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雖然話今日係遲咗少少出門口嘅，不過正常步速行都唔會遲到啦～

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我就好似平時咁行，又行到嚟見到懶洋洋嘅貓貓～

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貓貓已經瞓咗喺度曬晨光浴喇～

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你真係好懶呢～我都已經冇你咁懶喇～（雖然今日遲咗出門口...但唔關懶事囉！）

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你有你曬晨光浴～我都要返學㗎喇～

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落到嚟黨鐵站，企喺身邊等緊車嘅乘客都同平時嘅唔同...

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呢種唔同...唔知點解總係令我有少少不安...

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我係唔係習慣咗規律嘅生活？過往嘅生活又會唔會過於規律？規律到病態？

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所以話習慣真係好可怕...

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不過...有咁規律嘅生活...或者好大原因係因為都仲係停留喺同Jeff一齊嗰陣...嗰啲一齊生活嘅習慣...

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的確呢...雖然冇咗Jeff喺身邊...但我一直都保持住過著同Jeff一齊生活嘅模式...

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明明已經離開咗...得返我自己一個...都仲係停留喺過往嘅生活規律之中...

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我仲留住嗰種感覺...強行捉實嗰種感覺...

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唔想...亦唔願俾嗰種感覺慢慢咁消失...失去...

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一直帶住嗰種感覺等車...上車...企喺車廂中...

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雖然身邊嘅人都唔同晒...時間都唔同...但我都仲係緊緊咁捉實嗰種感覺...

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直到到站落車...又一個人咁行返去學校...行到返學校...

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我都冇乜點留意學校有冇咩大變化...或者學校十年如一日...都唔會有咩大變化...

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然後我就返到上課室...做返科長嘅責任！

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係吖～要收功課吖～

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雖然同學都未返齊～都收咗先啦～

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有得交嘅就交～仲未交得嘅就抄～

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然後Crystal都返到嚟喇～

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『早吖～』我返埋位，拍拍Crystal，『交功課吖～』

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「未做晒啦！」Crystal喺個背囊摷摷，「借嚟抄啦！」

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『唉都預咗你㗎啦～』我都拎份功課俾Crystal，『唔知啱唔啱㗎！唔好抄足吖！』

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「唔抄足又點知啱唔啱吖？」Crystal唔理我咁多！抄咗先！

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講到好似好有道理咁...但道理又喺邊呢？

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只見Crystal好努力咁抄我份功課！但又好唔專心咁同我講：「係吖！今日你等埋我先好走喎！」

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『一定係我等你㗎？唔俾係你等我㗎？』

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「點睇都係我哋遲放啲㗎啦～」

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『你又知？可能我哋遲放啲呢～』

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「我唔覺得你哋有咩嘢做囉～」

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『我夠唔覺得你哋有幾多嘢搞咯～』

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「總之就邊個完先就邊個等啦！唔好煩住我抄功課吖！抄唔切㗎喇！」

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『得喇得喇！先完先等啦～』

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我哋講咗咁耐講緊乜？

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做乜要等？唔係一齊放㗎咩？點解好似分開咗咁嘅？

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因為今日就要開始課外活動喇！

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Crystal參加咗排球隊就唔再多講啦～

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而我呢...就參加咗大哥哥大姐姐計劃～

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