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不起眼的作者評文
ENTRY #34
Author: 羅璃
Published:
Jul 16, 2025
不起眼的作者評文
Published:
Jul 16, 2025
ENTRY #34
《既為刀俎》評文
Author: 羅璃
Published:
Jul 16, 2025
1 Min Read
317 Words
No Plagiarism!TAI3za0k0Sw6SZaGwkAzposted on PＥNAＮＡ

耀西的作品我很喜歡！

不管事文筆還是譬喻的部分都讓我大開眼界！

但是還有一個地方讓我覺得怪怪的

像是第四段的一個小部分"馬蹄聲如雷疾馳而過"，文中的"如雷疾馳而過"

我覺得可改成(以下是我的觀點ww)：254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCWc1XZL88

"馬蹄如雷般，疾馳而過"

254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVw67pa0Rl

為什麼會說這裡怪怪的呢?254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2DYb6ekFWt

「如雷」雖然很有氣勢，但個人感覺怪怪的，

你這裡的意思是在比喻馬蹄聲如雷一樣急速的快速地奔馳而過，但我覺得以古風文章的角度來看，可以改成‘’ 馬蹄如雷般，疾馳而過‘’，簡單來說就是前後矛盾

因為，

你這裡想要比喻馬蹄聲如雷一樣疾馳而過，但是你這裡是比喻馬蹄聲，這裡是比喻聲音，可是你後面是比喻速度，我覺得這兩個地方有點矛盾，要比喻聲音可以用‘’馬蹄聲如風捲殘雲，一掠而過‘’，如過要比喻速度的話可以用‘’馬蹄如雷般，疾馳而過‘’

以上是我對那一句的觀點，可能會有一點不好 ，感謝觀看🙇🏻‍♀️（這部我很喜歡！已書籤！）

216.73.217.19

ns216.73.217.19da2
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bl 黑暗 古風 bg 言情 驚悚 骨科 羅璃
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