隔天夜裡，風從窗縫鑽進來。房間裡很安靜，只有鍵盤偶爾的敲擊聲。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡulv07CsU1i
賴夏陽正坐在書桌前看著模擬考解答，眼神有些恍惚。他揉了揉太陽穴，覺得最近頭老是痛，胸口也悶得很。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtVSo3Kcbu
「應該只是太累了吧……」他低聲說，拿起水杯灌了一口。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAuBnzkOzR
但下一秒，他突然開始猛烈地咳嗽——
一聲接著一聲，喉嚨像被火燒一樣難受。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GuVxEShm0
他急忙起身想去廁所，卻沒走兩步就扶著牆滑坐下來。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtgwmoZpLrM
咳嗽沒有停，他的手掌按住嘴，卻感覺到一陣濕潤的黏膩。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIlLY3VvnP7
當他看見掌心那一抹鮮紅時，整個人都愣住了。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEruqXnzxRv
那不是鼻血——
是血，從喉嚨咳出來的。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxU6xzNQ0DU
—
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNjzC5NpFD
他沒有馬上驚慌，只是安靜地坐在地上，看著那血跡發了一會兒呆。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq6CuySvpKx
「……怎麼會這樣？」
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMCMAn5yci
他的聲音幾乎聽不見。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHguSBUInzs
幾分鐘後，他勉強起身，洗掉手上的血，換了件衣服，悄悄出門。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDlHg7Ajbm
沒有跟任何人說。
他只是覺得，不能再拖了。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukklqLV3sK
這件事，他必須一個人知道答案。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkdRb4xj2J7
醫院的空氣聞起來總是混著消毒水味道，冷冷的，有點刺鼻。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNPgdCV78C
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFUxe4gsKnD
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz9T8lv8Htu
賴夏陽拿著掛號單，坐在等候區的角落，帽子壓得低低的，背包放在腳邊。他左手插著口袋，右手握著手機，螢幕亮著，但他根本沒在看。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwDXPcvXIe
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBPaAwZNxt8
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCFTYlMiei
他沒告訴任何人。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIveF0DP3I3
不是不信任，只是——不想讓別人擔心。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsDU2IKABNi
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehWId8LrT5
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sze3gOXDZ
「賴夏陽先生，請進診間三。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKOYAsFIjB
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4UuNx4wk6
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWkyxJftFjJ
他站起來，深吸一口氣，走進診間。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdlQir0aAD
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1KegF0w9It
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVmQbn96PR
—8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tSsHQzKe6
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUW2eea65Dj
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTe4Fc3KZaK
醫生是個中年男人，戴著眼鏡，臉上表情一如既往的冷靜與專業。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4jA6vWecP
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9sinuotC37
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAa8133svrT
他看著報告，看了很久。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGSUncnLq4
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPmEkoxRruc
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKj2slQQnd
「你的影像資料我們已經仔細判讀過了。」醫生說，聲音平靜卻緩慢，「目前來看，肺部的異常陰影已經明顯擴散，我們懷疑是惡性腫瘤。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuL8eZT7AiF
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjKTnS1UbRx
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ678IOw6VxA
賴夏陽一時間沒有反應。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZ0A6L8bQb
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu59H0XytQu
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8cGw8xtL9
他甚至下意識笑了一下：「惡性……什麼？」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDN8lp2uGhi
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqs7GwHw4Nr
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBoqCS5Y8U1
「肺腺癌，第三期偏晚。建議你盡快安排更進一步的切片與全身檢查，並與家屬討論治療方向，後天再來做一次檢查。」醫生說完這句，才抬起頭看著他：「你今天是一個人來的？」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9HZYZfzzu
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVl5pMH4sM
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLMdtGXBlCF
「嗯……我爸媽都在外地工作，不方便過來。」他語氣輕鬆，但指尖抓緊了背包的拉鍊。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡclB9x0rfQa
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbDlMUGYXx
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZk02aVPmLv
「這不是小病，孩子。」醫生的語氣比剛才溫柔了些，「如果你信得過我，我們會陪你走下一步，但你要讓身邊的人知道。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNimlRgl1j
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHHsnG6NO9K
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmmsNQeqXpx
夏陽笑了笑：「我知道了。謝謝你。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRrIlRpg2D
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBMifQaBwsB
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwIiObs39Kz
—8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkoBWbdSrHM
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡde9xjs8gB9
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhGQxFz1khA
走出醫院那一刻，陽光很強。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8sivoAljb
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzY3k0Utfi
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1sE7l8ULJ
他站在門口的陰影下，低頭看著手裡那份檢查報告。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlp8T9KZ4PP
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgpFGhsKRDE
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc07kBQk0JB
手有一點抖。他不記得自己最後一次怕成這樣是什麼時候——是國小第一次騎腳踏車摔倒？還是那次父母吵架，把家裡東西摔得亂七八糟？8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmAHZtQooXd
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡelYD1ypKpt
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVm5Gpc2dg
都不是。這種感覺更孤單。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GXzkp3eUF
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJF7iO9V0Y
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfUl9rO5Bg
他把報告折起來，收進背包最底層。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡonQfpZGluc
接著掏出手機，給冬月傳了一則訊息：8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssoqMiQkP9
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡptBjbVDPEY
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54QSKqlfRG
【等等要不要吃甜不辣？我今天嘴巴很饞。】8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhFeYE8aOz
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KZv0ZwU5O
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1yg1I8WDa
螢幕亮起時，心裡的某個東西也默默碎了一小塊。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjIh18FqbI
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTrhp3UDNNU
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJ1bhnyH9o
但他的語氣，還是一如往常的陽光。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrOJBZVXpEA
這天，醫院裡沒什麼人，窗外陰雲低壓，像雨快要落下。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXOyqb3DgcA
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOUfHHR3hj
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tybIbN4DJ
賴夏陽坐在診間外，一隻手撐著額頭，一隻手握著手機，螢幕停在一張和陳冬月的合照。照片裡她笑得很甜，笑眼彎彎，而他就在旁邊笑著看她。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6n8e8zD2d
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeleBYpZdO
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkHojSF8KLk
診間的門開了。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSortJtIs9
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡovzkCTmWHd
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZUuoiQ8YO1
「賴夏陽，進來吧。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOzIryRc1h
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxF1wX9P0y
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGpx4b706r
—8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw93XUKLJk4
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPvnrAarZk
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQZT1O45ak
這次的報告比上次厚了一些。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhzkvBOBnj
醫生沒有立刻說話，而是翻閱資料，再三確認過數據後才抬起頭。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKkWxkOxDL
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhS02HqoZGB
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡco6TCyA0ZZ
「夏陽，這次的結果出來了。我們已經進行過切片、影像與血液標記檢查……很遺憾地告訴你——你目前的病情是肺腺癌第四期，癌細胞已經轉移到淋巴與骨骼組織。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8V94dqLDQi
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrZzckKnff
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIItoQ9l5K
他愣了一下，眼睛眨也沒眨，但胸口突然像被重錘打了一下。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKOeVbccrjy
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMAjyoOS83
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKqF2EdWi4
醫生語氣盡量柔和：「以目前情況來看，若不接受侵入性治療，存活期大約只剩下三個月左右。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNRTrMpdBn
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbn6RMqFo0m
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsVYQ1hbnGJ
「……三個月。」他重複了一次，聲音低得像喃喃自語。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJgbcxzPr6
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBJ3uB3pxC
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVWUAixzhK
「是。」醫生點頭，「如果願意配合化療、標靶，或許可以爭取更多時間，但這些治療……會很辛苦，副作用也很強。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1gnnkvqj8
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQSNkJzkGY
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqCRlDtn2b
賴夏陽沒有馬上說話，只是靜靜地坐著，視線落在桌面某個角落。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuZR5lI6aw
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsnBSm3VtIn
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3le8YIhNF
「這些話你今天第一次聽到，可能會很難接受。」醫生遞了一杯水給他，「你需要一些時間，也建議你讓家人知道，這不是你可以獨自扛下的事。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkbqRiLwg91
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwVVHV49TS
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRrYEzaW7Za
他看著那杯水，手卻沒伸出去。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0OYTHq3EC
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRSZVRxsfV
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0fwMSNHOR
「……謝謝你告訴我。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnIPijy0lfz
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeq48qFSB3H
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9VGHa1kmN
「夏陽——」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkW6pIbZKRu
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡngZUm7Mc0H
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWLXOmqFzP
「我知道該怎麼做。」他輕輕打斷醫生，語氣還是那麼平靜，「我只是……還有幾個人，我想再陪陪他們，然後，我會處理好我自己的事。」8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdbgCzTT8Q
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYudut35ofV
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtKEafVpAJd
—8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡys23RqGPJy
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSsjS1rwZb
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQOIPgcXiy
走出診間的時候，他沒哭。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHeWXBaPR89
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHL9pBXimg8
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjT0qIfXot
只是手指一直摩擦著褲邊的縫線，像是用這個動作提醒自己還活著。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbha15LQbv
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRAWXDT06aK
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlccqWvowoO
三個月。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTTyosHoln
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1r9AliOOaF
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs8smmuEBYC
這是醫生說出口，但彷彿用刀刻在他心口的字。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGJZH4FkoL
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHQLMSEB3P
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxw2CSB7AQc
他走到醫院樓下，站在陽光底下。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjFQBGZN4C
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3RM47EXwwp
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMAIKuO9OVE
這天的天氣很好，天空藍得像不會崩塌的夢。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZR0NrBfiYy
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3v25OR8m38
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsVv1zLnQj
可他知道，自己的世界，開始倒數了。
醫生說，只剩三個月。8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPGXnFUpyej
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wcngL7QpN
「不過也有例外。」
「你可以選擇化療，但……機會不大。」
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10budU7Uai
他搖了搖頭。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgmqBzD46P
他想到冬月。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxJp7BCDZJ
不行，他不能讓她親眼看見他一點一點地衰弱。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ238ZBtq8p
那會成為她一輩子的夢魘。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgNiAu782av
他要把最好的自己，留在她記憶裡。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFKAo6xpkf
—
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGIZBhHXLT
那幾天，他突然變得格外貼心，天天接她放學、帶她去吃她喜歡的甜點、看電影、吹風，什麼都順著她。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8a095idx7J
冬月察覺到他的異樣，卻說不上來是哪裡。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZuxvsNFzG
她只知道，這幾天像一場夢。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Mdr2Ajzeh
是他們之間，最美的一場夢。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bWV3OJGHx
—
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dMzpXrQzc
幾天後，他開始變冷淡，不再主動、不再回訊息，眼神也不再柔軟。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFi2pvS0YQ
她問他：「你怎麼了？」
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ2R7mDYknI
他只是淡淡地說：「我們……是不是該給彼此一點空間？」
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNEIHVqy27e
她愣住。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQi3zq6dZkF
一顆心，瞬間凍住。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHd1CPkkwtv
—
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHZnlFOtW9
然後，他消失了。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBW3L1E2hX
只留下一封信。
8Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5tDSIwICq
「小月亮，對不起，我太自私了。我不想讓妳看著我慢慢死去。妳值得更好的人生、更完整的愛。
所以我選擇一個人去走這段路——
到我人生最後的冬天。」
然後按「加至主畫面」