Most girls remember dolls, ribbons, birthday cakes.
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Me? I remember shadows.
How they used to move before the lights even went off.
How I could tell what kind of night it’d be by the sound of the door slamming shut downstairs.
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtzZgeRtSt1
I was seven when I learned not all monsters live under your bed.
Some sleep in the next room. Some wear your mother’s perfume. Some smile in your face before they sell you out for a fix.
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They called it “foster care,” but I called it trading hands.
One dirty couch to the next. One man’s rules to another’s hands.
By nine, I’d already counted more locks than birthdays.
And by eleven—I stopped waiting on anyone to come save me.
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I started learning passwords instead.
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMRwA23X6Z
I’d sneak into libraries and watch YouTube tutorials on coding, pretending it was just curiosity.
But truth was, I wanted something no one could take from me.
Something stronger than fists or fear.
Information. Power. Silence that listened to me for once.
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbMQ2z5lgI
That’s when Nova Rae was born.
Not the broken girl with scars under her sleeve.
But the ghost who could follow the money, the threat, the lie—and make it all disappear.
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMzdrwhYrc
People look at me now, and they see the gloss, the glow-up, the girl with the clicks.
But they don’t know about the girl who had to hide her tears under fluorescent lights in shelters.
Who kept a blade under her tongue and code in her bones.
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I don’t want your pity.
Just remember—
Pretty doesn’t mean untouched.
And loud girls like me? We learned to scream because no one ever listened when we whispered.
I was twelve the first time I hacked someone.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTMGYbMM0S
Not for money. Not for clout.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEim5eKQo1L
For survival.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnCP6waExOJ
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WNdWWrsNZ
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡezRhUNtdmG
Miss Laney—my third foster mama in two months—had sticky fingers and a nastier attitude.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHs6D4brvnA
Kept her fridge locked, her mouth mean, and her eyes on my clothes like they were her property.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNTcwmLmAm2
She’d smile in front of the caseworker and say I was “adjusting just fine.”16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxk1GNR8FLo
But the minute that door closed, I was back to being her little maid with a mattress on the floor and bruises she said I earned.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsxrTnclLW
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSE9Vj9vRI
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGugoC3kd74
I’d had enough.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu220whOFbf
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhu6zueNi4g
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDl1VhgnCXc
She had this dusty old Dell laptop she guarded like gold.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJXKFIRgKG
She’d always log into her food stamp portal in front of me—bragging about how much she’d get “just for feeding little street rats.”16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7z1cDJwCAo
Except she never fed us. The cabinets stayed empty.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlaRjrr2PAi
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNbz9fOYnDC
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9i5c17R6D1
One night, while she was snoring off boxed wine and bitterness, I snuck into the kitchen.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkE9FU7sDnx
Took her laptop. Sat on the floor with a flashlight between my knees.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjq8jI4OzHy
Heart pounding. Hands shaking.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQI2PARQ5aw
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8ztTkqw5O
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She used the same password for everything—Laney1234.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw70uN9wRwp
Too easy.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSr7DFbzist
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhx47sagoZN
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjm50qm5H8
I clicked into her account, found her full name, her case info, and her EBT card ID.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4aj5PY8qFc
Felt like God when I figured out how to reroute that whole deposit.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdpOYQuN3X
Transferred every dollar to a new account linked to a prepaid card I’d watched a kid at the shelter set up earlier that week.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsGYzwPJXw
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAVzivY51o3
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I didn’t stop there.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡADPTjrPg4d
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo33iOm57Km
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUS2yK27vHQ
I forwarded her entire search history—every sketchy ad she posted, every complaint the other kids had written about her but never submitted—to her case manager’s inbox.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf11SWfRqnm
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmtGFEkqG8a
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Then I put the laptop back.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡteKrU6bA1J
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCw4cIMZBZ
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The next morning, she cursed the devil into the floorboards trying to figure out why her card declined.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8xnvyeaCy
By that afternoon, a social worker was knocking at the door.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJxg0Ua6ov
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I didn’t smile when they pulled me out of that house.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgbbhkMrSC
But inside?16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnypbncajp
I was lit up like a sunrise.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMo2jtxWDmU
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGicO11Fjdp
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGWiVM3gwI
That was the day I realized something.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡErSskBigX1
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhpXYbS9Vg
16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsnhk6gUbXx
I didn’t need to fight with fists.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRhKalFpXS
I had keystrokes.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwnVcXTXqM
And people like Miss Laney?16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQm475NfXko
They had no idea what a girl like me could do once she learned the system.
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