What do birthdays mean to you?
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To me, birthday is a celebration of someone’s birth. Like a fact that they made it here and made it all the way to whatever the age they turned. They’ve filled the year and hope that they will yet again, fill another year with... well, I guess life. Since I never usually go around telling people how much I appreciate them being alive, I secretly take the time to appreciate them on their birthdays. So... to me, birthday is pretty much a day for me to say "thank you" to the other party. I know that this is not the common (?) way for people to think about birthdays, so I don’t usually tell people what birthdays mean to me. I just congratulate them and give gifts if necessary.
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My point is... in my household, we celebrate already deceased people as well.
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Because... even if they are no longer with us doesn’t change the fact that they once were and left enough impact for the rest of us to remember them and appreciate what can now only be memories. Your birthday is pretty much a day for me to celebrate, I guess. It might be weird but I kind of like it. Even my own birthdays. I’ll give myself a clap on the back for making it this far. But since I know that not everybody thinks of birthdays like this, I usually don’t like to tell people mine. I know that some have trouble memorizing it, and to some, it’s just another Tuesday. Although I know it in my brain, I can’t help but to get a little bit sad when people forget my birthday. So, in order for me to feel like nobody really forgot me... I mean my birthday; I just don’t tell them. You can’t forget something you never knew. It’s not that important anyways.
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I don’t know when I developed these kinds of defense mechanisms... But lately, people ask for mine and makes a face when I don’t tell them. I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t remember even if I tell them, so I don’t really know what the problem is? Am I making it seem more “important” somehow by withholding the information? Like I’m gatekeeping my birthday for the “chosen ones” who’ll remember them? And whenever I feel like this, I like to think: it’s not that serious...
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So...what do birthdays mean to you?
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