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Today, I am back from Hell to Earth — Encanto, this animated film teaches you how to properly rebuild a broken home and inner confidence.
The protagonist, Mirabel, really, really loves her family! And her family members are all godlike superhumans! When outsiders invaded, they shut themselves off from the world to defend against the enemy, helping the whole village rebuild and prosper!
Mirabel constantly talks about how amazing her family’s powers are, how impressive their history is, and how beautiful and sad their culture balbalbal... But the more she praises her family, the more she feels like she herself is lacking. She doesn’t understand why—despite being born into the same household—the miracle didn’t happen to her. As a result, she lost the love her grandmother once had for her as a child, and as she grew older, her family often forgot about her or didn’t even consider her part of the household.
This isn’t Mirabel’s fault—it’s her grandmother’s. Her grandmother was too afraid of losing everything again, so she wouldn’t allow anyone in the family to show weakness. This created a household that seemed strong on the outside but was breaking down internally. Every family member began to believe their value only existed in how useful their abilities were. Their once-great gifts became the very curse that made them insecure.
Mirabel, terrified of being the “black sheep,” tried everything she could to save the "miracle" and restore the family’s unity and strength. And just when she couldn’t take it anymore, she finally snapped and said something equally harsh back to her critical grandmother—and the house collapsed.
After this huge failure, the grandmother finally truly reflected. She realized that the family's fracture wasn't Mirabel's fault. She admitted her vulnerability and apologized to Mirabel for years of unfair treatment. Only then could Mirabel reconnect with her emotionally and rebuild their home together.
When the family later handed Mirabel a doorknob and she said, “I see me. All of me.”—that moment marked her transformation from someone pretending to be confident into someone who truly was. She was finally accepted by her community, and fully accepted herself. She no longer needed to repeatedly say, “Look how amazing my family is!” to pretend she was proud of herself.
So if you feel like you’re constantly being excluded by a place, maybe it’s because your own lack of confidence is passively attacking others, making them self-censor around you and feel you’re very hard to talk to. Because your insecurity has made it impossible to have a rational discussion without you derailing the conversation with personal plus nationality attacks?
And if you have a “harsh grandmother” like that—who won’t sincerely apologize, and instead keeps gaslighting you into being the insecure person that you are right now—maybe it’s time to learn how to validate yourself without tearing others down. Try being a grounded and clear-minded human being on your own. As the song sang:
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“Cause stars don’t shine, they burn. And the constellations shift.
I think it’s time you learn, you’re more than just your gift.”
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A person—no matter where they’re born—has no reason to be proud or ashamed of that alone, because it’s not something they earned. Remember: being born isn’t a skill. And anyone who jokes about it, to identify themselves as a noble, probably is the least respected and least contributing member of their own family, so useless that even they can’t respect themselves in deep.
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