好痛。272Please respect copyright.PENANAGggYEpiniV
272Please respect copyright.PENANA2bnWImKaG1
好痛,卻哭不出來。272Please respect copyright.PENANA7qRXWyrbAR
272Please respect copyright.PENANAFwTeyz0ZCo
眼淚會讓人迷路。自從爸爸離家後,媽媽總是會對我這麼說。272Please respect copyright.PENANAuZvdRPee2G
272Please respect copyright.PENANArBVQEo6r0s
或許是因為如此,我才會忘了怎麼哭泣。272Please respect copyright.PENANA3iJg5jwOUz
272Please respect copyright.PENANAQTYllY1CDc
但,即使哭不出來,國一的那堂體育課,我的膝蓋仍綻開了血淋淋的傷口;而那位名叫艾瑪的同班同學,才會向呆坐在地上的我搭話。272Please respect copyright.PENANAs12ue9TeQS
272Please respect copyright.PENANAV9Iv4DeZ4R
『你現在在哪裡?』272Please respect copyright.PENANAK9ZIKt7LkN
272Please respect copyright.PENANAov344eOAN1
說出這句令人摸不著頭緒的話語的,是因為孤僻的個性而在班上被欺負過幾次的陰森少女。272Please respect copyright.PENANA7KZPWFBx0J
272Please respect copyright.PENANArtoDpEpwGw
雖然不受歡迎,卻長得很漂亮。墨水似的柔軟黑色長髮、洋娃娃一樣的細緻五官、怕被發現一般的淡淡薰衣草香。272Please respect copyright.PENANAhohUPyT5rm
272Please respect copyright.PENANA924EiBUv1B
她微微掀起裙角,露出左腳的膝蓋。272Please respect copyright.PENANA2zIOCAnOl7
272Please respect copyright.PENANAwZugd0c97E
一塊紗布包裹著那裡。272Please respect copyright.PENANAQERwRFjLYt
272Please respect copyright.PENANAiHHTBspyYj
『我們都在這裡呢,露娜。』她向我微笑。272Please respect copyright.PENANAcBEfdQZ1i4
272Please respect copyright.PENANAJJpbMWnJf6
如此怪異的說話方式,或許就是她會被欺負的原因吧。但我並不介意,因為我想我們在班上都一樣格格不入。272Please respect copyright.PENANAcuD48a46zt
272Please respect copyright.PENANAvKvrarcApc
後來,她陪我一起到保健室。看見我沒有像其他同學一樣把她趕走,她似乎很開心。272Please respect copyright.PENANARtkLegktsU
272Please respect copyright.PENANAioEY6mmcur
從此以後,她變得只黏在我身邊。272Please respect copyright.PENANAm2abFBQaNH
272Please respect copyright.PENANAxazJxAGKdN
我發現我們有許多相似之處。除了都很安靜以外,我們還喜歡看書,也喜歡畫畫。272Please respect copyright.PENANA9rE5JU7oY5
272Please respect copyright.PENANADII0pT6232
她買了一本筆記本,與我在上課時互傳、輪流塗鴉。我很喜歡艾瑪的塗鴉,她會畫她養的短毛貓高斯,以及她跟姐姐、媽媽——是的,我們都沒有爸爸。高斯這個名字是她姐姐取的,她的姐姐似乎很聰明,在鎮上的大學裡做大腦相關的研究。272Please respect copyright.PENANAyVmOl2FsWP
272Please respect copyright.PENANAzLMQJ0ZIwq
轉眼間,我們就迎來國一升國二的暑假。放假後,我跟艾瑪常去不同地方玩,有時去逛書店,有時去看電影。272Please respect copyright.PENANAynZJwGmDKj
272Please respect copyright.PENANAhkAao0ghpW
一次,我們去參觀科博館。那天艾瑪的話突然變得很多,到處向我介紹姐姐告訴過她的知識。272Please respect copyright.PENANApjKm2ge0eq
272Please respect copyright.PENANAWSxS5TNkq7
我記得她站在科博館二樓的大腦模型前面,平時暗沉沉的眼睛閃閃發光。272Please respect copyright.PENANATMgZtfaWE2
272Please respect copyright.PENANACV36yRodsm
『露娜,你現在在哪裡?』她這麼問我。272Please respect copyright.PENANATAtI5tS6dP
272Please respect copyright.PENANADKEkoamplx
又是這個奇怪的問題。272Please respect copyright.PENANAyEXAsbRubL
272Please respect copyright.PENANAnvkQw3ZJ9K
她逕自接著說道,人們在某個時刻的思緒和感受,好比位在一張巨大地圖上的一個點;而那張地圖,解釋了我們從何而來,可以往哪裡去。272Please respect copyright.PENANA5Zoz3GJZWj
272Please respect copyright.PENANAbB0Ty8ywGf
可惜,那張地圖不是平的,而是立體的,或4、5,甚至更高次元的,所以科學家暫時還找不到它。若是找到了,人們就能知道怎麼從這件事想到那件事,怎麼從高興走到難過,怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。272Please respect copyright.PENANAuvZ41IvknN
272Please respect copyright.PENANAAbLmMWzcIu
這些都是她姐姐告訴她的。當然,我一點也不知道她在說什麼。272Please respect copyright.PENANAv18yWx1qqF
272Please respect copyright.PENANAm4gE1JRsH6
開學後,我們又度過了數週平平無奇的學校生活。272Please respect copyright.PENANArUedf34zKV
272Please respect copyright.PENANAuLyZu3Mg1W
上課、塗鴉、放學時一起回家,一切都看似毫無異狀。272Please respect copyright.PENANAgf76826s5x
272Please respect copyright.PENANAOaVvU2io26
然而,隨著國二的尾聲到來,那件事情發生了。272Please respect copyright.PENANAqXgDlQGnST
272Please respect copyright.PENANAfnJKOSZtl5
高斯死了。272Please respect copyright.PENANAqQbIbbeaUv
272Please respect copyright.PENANARCO4mgno01
這是在艾瑪因為難過而兩個禮拜都沒來學校後,才從她口中得知的事情。272Please respect copyright.PENANAeWNntIsymK
272Please respect copyright.PENANA1HPgLU6e1b
『就因為這樣?』272Please respect copyright.PENANAPpMHZ6iZwx
272Please respect copyright.PENANAS222bz4ora
那節下課,站在艾瑪的座位前,我脫口而出這句話。272Please respect copyright.PENANAuuU18hwQ7n
272Please respect copyright.PENANAtOzW3tRgDP
我只是覺得她不因該讓自己那麼傷心。272Please respect copyright.PENANAfsAONAM6NA
272Please respect copyright.PENANAPzpZUBT0XC
因為,眼淚會讓人迷路。272Please respect copyright.PENANA4fTGbqM7kT
272Please respect copyright.PENANAXkmFBaWLyx
然而,艾瑪似乎無法理解我的意思。直到我看見她的臉垮下來,眼眶裡有淚水在打轉,我才知道我搞砸了。272Please respect copyright.PENANA7ByXbV60oA
272Please respect copyright.PENANAGEWIf7lyvj
後來,直到放暑假,她都沒有再來學校。我想了想,決定傳訊息向她道歉,但她只回了一次「沒關係」,就再也沒有回過我之後的訊息了。272Please respect copyright.PENANAytzrZCZ05n
272Please respect copyright.PENANAGOqQHdKPKr
暑假過後,三年級的開學日,我再次遇見艾瑪。272Please respect copyright.PENANAgJq2JyBjhv
272Please respect copyright.PENANASHPb48PiLG
她的樣子變得古怪。她的眼神更加沒有生氣、更不愛說話,沒人知道她發生了什麼事。大家都避開她,而我也一直找不到機會跟她搭話,只能默默的觀察著她。那本筆記本上再也沒有新的塗鴉。272Please respect copyright.PENANAAMjjluz6C0
272Please respect copyright.PENANAh85aY9GoDD
畢業後,我們又恰巧進入同一所高中。她就在我隔壁班。每次我經過,都會看見她一次比一次消瘦。272Please respect copyright.PENANAeYopTs8rh7
272Please respect copyright.PENANAtDUvrXAbs5
不久後,他們班的傳聞就傳到我們班上,說她得了癌症、她被家人虐待、她被附身了。有一次,我在辦公室聽到老師們聊到艾瑪,說她好像去了奇怪的教會。272Please respect copyright.PENANAnF8M5cz1vC
272Please respect copyright.PENANAsDAyHGU5k2
高二接近尾聲的一日放學,我經過他們班,看到裡面空空如也。在她的座位上,我看見有幾束鮮花和燒過的蠟燭擺在那。272Please respect copyright.PENANAIifJXbk4kS
272Please respect copyright.PENANApFLSNGvu6L
艾瑪去世了。272Please respect copyright.PENANAQpjuNJbiNR
272Please respect copyright.PENANA4VoGTfmHTa
她是DMT中毒致死的,DMT是一種毒品的樣子,鎮上的報導是這麼說的。我不知道艾瑪為什麼會吸毒,也不知道她從哪裡弄來這種毒藥。272Please respect copyright.PENANAy2RnJwcDg0
272Please respect copyright.PENANAIGfHkU71yi
然而,我告訴自己不能哭,不能迷路。大家都得在自己的路上繼續前進。272Please respect copyright.PENANAQZW75aa1ZD
272Please respect copyright.PENANAyXG2oA9dBU
上課、作業、考試,一成不變的生活因此繼續運轉著,隔壁班似乎也一下子就忘了她。272Please respect copyright.PENANACkhbSoy6Rm
272Please respect copyright.PENANA9zHsihsif1
但,就在放假前一週的生物課上,老師跟我們分享了一個科學上的新發現。272Please respect copyright.PENANAHAkybz6PNi
272Please respect copyright.PENANAaBOJgdKyc5
他說科學家發現了一個多達數千億維的空間。這個空間記錄了人類大腦任何可能的思想狀態。科學家稱這個空間「意識宇宙」。272Please respect copyright.PENANAvH0DoV2M91
272Please respect copyright.PENANAj0Bs23birm
當下,我想起了去科博館玩的那次,艾瑪所說的那張巨大地圖,還有怎麼從高興走到難過、怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。272Please respect copyright.PENANAahlMTj1GqF
272Please respect copyright.PENANA1zDK7FwAbh
我感到一陣反胃。在以內急當藉口離開教室後,我跑向廁所。272Please respect copyright.PENANAXiPJCEzQDs
272Please respect copyright.PENANAwXmOWO81Hl
跑著跑著,跟艾瑪有關的回憶不斷湧現。272Please respect copyright.PENANAphwn82JoAT
272Please respect copyright.PENANAdH9LKlDkKr
首先,是我與艾瑪的最後一次對話。那時的我只是希望艾瑪不要因為難過而迷失了,但我現在卻隱約明白,有什麼注定讓艾瑪流淚。272Please respect copyright.PENANARtNGv8VQfv
272Please respect copyright.PENANACBtZqJU9Bx
接著,是我們經歷過的種種。艾瑪和我暑假時常去的書店,艾瑪在筆記本上的塗鴉,還有艾瑪在那堂體育課向我說的那句話。272Please respect copyright.PENANAGqwNwK8OfR
272Please respect copyright.PENANA1yaqylXtdO
我頓時恍然大悟。艾瑪讓我看她膝蓋的傷,並不是想說我們受傷的地方一樣——272Please respect copyright.PENANAxwClN3KD7z
272Please respect copyright.PENANA4cieIhPcQw
而是想告訴我,在那張以數億個維度所描繪的地圖上,我們在同一個地方。272Please respect copyright.PENANAM6edmb7o2a
272Please respect copyright.PENANAyEUNFU3Vpb
我們一樣痛。272Please respect copyright.PENANAuPFk8hIgBc
272Please respect copyright.PENANA5iTfe5XsaI
——我現在在哪裡?272Please respect copyright.PENANAYc6cCXbZoW
272Please respect copyright.PENANACT6ZZA2mgv
好痛。272Please respect copyright.PENANAKJZ2NaB0vI
272Please respect copyright.PENANAagO7CvhPyh
好痛,卻哭不出來。272Please respect copyright.PENANALxWQUbrbyb
272Please respect copyright.PENANASrnMUNCM87
胸口就像膝蓋那時的傷口一樣刺痛;我停步在走廊上,難受的蹲下。272Please respect copyright.PENANAB5e8o9JbeD
272Please respect copyright.PENANAzHMR0hT0WK
我好希望當我抬頭時,能看見艾瑪對我微笑。272Please respect copyright.PENANAILRWnmpZhH
272Please respect copyright.PENANA7JAoUQOmuJ
但,倘若她還活著,或許只會回我一句「就因為這樣」。272Please respect copyright.PENANAovn73CIfbY
272Please respect copyright.PENANAW7kN3NY49R
好痛,好憤怒。272Please respect copyright.PENANAomjQuYa3ev
272Please respect copyright.PENANAiohEK0i8XD
艾瑪迷失時,我拋棄了她。272Please respect copyright.PENANACiSYP9TX4W
272Please respect copyright.PENANAX9wVvE3G1V
我就這樣放手了,導致了這場悲劇。272Please respect copyright.PENANAxYrGQYJJIb
272Please respect copyright.PENANAWoajqXlKIP
艾瑪死後,我仍假裝自己沒有迷路。272Please respect copyright.PENANA4fvn5CsEEw
272Please respect copyright.PENANAlz9BDScyQB
假裝不珍惜她,作為我曾經最好的朋友。272Please respect copyright.PENANArScjWl2ue2
272Please respect copyright.PENANAMJBWTMaL58
突然,彷彿不留給我任何喘息的餘地一般,我的手機傳來震動。272Please respect copyright.PENANAZt2254JnV8
272Please respect copyright.PENANAzDk8mcic8C
我懺抖著從口袋中拿出手機,將恍惚的目光投向螢幕。272Please respect copyright.PENANAMUZPk6ns6E
272Please respect copyright.PENANAJBDJpqtHJf
我看見通知欄顯示的屬名和訊息內容。一時之間,我所有的思緒都停滯了。272Please respect copyright.PENANAeyINnVG9Py
272Please respect copyright.PENANAwQQZdnDHos
『艾瑪:』272Please respect copyright.PENANAnrWWwNqtNT
272Please respect copyright.PENANADPUXW7mIyz
『來地圖上找我。』272Please respect copyright.PENANAXjbCT1Xo1K
272Please respect copyright.PENANA5chpgqG85I