【校園/日常】杏壇中學眾生相 - [3-3]主席的危機

熟悉的1A教室內，桌子的佈局和平時有些不一樣，有⼀張由數張學⽣桌組成的⼤桌⼦，幾個⼈正圍著這張⼤桌⼦戰戰兢兢地坐著，眼⾓不時瞄向敞開著的⼤⾨。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIao5Ng4JAP
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經過的旁人都能嗅到房內那種肅殺的味道。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESS1TodLYR
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「⽼實說，我們甚麼都沒有討論過，⼀會兒要怎樣應付『她』？」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkc6G46l3qs
天才，班會會計一臉嫌棄地說。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzOgW8wJSw5
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「事情發⽣得太突然，這次真的要靠⼤家臨場表現了。」班會主席羅晨西緊盯著大門說。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbnyoD8z3y
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班會文書林正君咬著下唇，聲音微微發抖：「臨場表現？你不是在開玩笑吧？」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCB1cspmEy
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「噓！」羅晨西聽到門外一絲動靜，連忙示意大家安靜。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88WFKXtI2c
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「噠、噠、噠⋯⋯」在⼤家不再說話後，⾨外的腳步聲越發明顯。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WV75S1qXw
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聽到這個有點熟悉的腳步聲，眾⼈⾯⾯相覷。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVitE8NH4eV
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「糟了！」羅晨西第一個回過神，意識到大事不妙。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRS3HIQ6R0q
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他⽴即狂打眼⾊。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9T2QsKUrE
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班會的副主席，Queenie的⼿在桌上掃了⼀圈。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIw2IqLBElq
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羅晨西堅定地點頭。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTMqE8m4j6
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Queenie⽐了個「ok」的⼿勢。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMDha4EsL1
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「他們兩個都在交流甚麼？」另外兩人驚訝地看著這個情景。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnM2N5OsLKr
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孫老師一踏進教室，滿臉狐疑地掃視大家，用一貫的壓迫聲音問：「你們剛剛在那邊擠眉弄眼什麼？」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZD0UZ3OeYf
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「第⼀關⽐想像中的更早來到。」羅晨西不動聲⾊，在腦海中急速搜索着應對之策。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSIzgCOzarH
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要怎樣才能避免激怒孫⽼師？這是⼀個1A班全體同學正在研究的課題。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlP0eThSmVd
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當中有⼀位同學的筆記本中，就有記載與此相關的資料。按照該同學整理的案例分析，以下三種情況激怒孫⽼師的機會可說是相當⾼。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡndfdh8wVHR
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⼀、作出違反杏壇中學校規的⾏為。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLhypSI14x4
⼆、在她⼼情不好的時候（可能是⽣理期），嘗試和她理論。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOB6jYORKSe
三、不慎應對她提出的問題導致她⼼情變差。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzL8MUn1hMN
（超過⼀半案例的成因出⾃此列，令⼈遺憾的是，我們未能找到有效的預防⽅法。）363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ2FHtylksy
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順帶一提，開學至今被抓出來罵的同學，比起第一次統計再多出了8人，已經佔到全班的50%。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHTApZD5GU
——摘錄⾃該筆記本的總結部分363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsoMPcx55z
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以下的這些，就是1A班⾯對的⽇常。

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「叮、噹、叮、噹——叮、噹、叮、噹——」八點整，鐘聲響起，李宜光氣喘吁吁地衝進教室。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk9C5Neq05w
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「停下來！」孫⽼師的臉上已經⾁眼可⾒地⽣氣。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWfWOjHOoy
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李宜光被孫⽼師的⼤聲訓斥嚇得站在原地，不知道該如何是好。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ZoOm39Qpd
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「出去！」孫老師大喝一聲，接著開始一條條地羅列出罪狀。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBZlGBGxbU
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「第⼀，你沒有敲⾨就進來！」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnT8bJaipOF
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「第⼆，你為甚麼會遲到？」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YGnzt4KVj
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「我今天剛好錯過了⼀輛⼩巴。」李宜光如實報告。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVJHeLT62g
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「這些不是合理的原因！」孫老師憤怒地大吼著。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZpnWHqGl0X
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「不是？是你叫我交代原因的？」李宜光⼼裡腹誹。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYYR7oSS7eB
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李宜光在這⼀天深刻體會到這種被針對的感覺，實在是很不好受。

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「林正君，為甚麼你的中⽂作業會在我的桌上？」孫⽼師把作業遞給林正君，看上去很平靜。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IpkAujKHN
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「啊？我昨天⽣病了，所以今早我把作業順便連同請假條⼀起交到你桌上了。」⼀臉無辜的林正君沒察覺到任何異常。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡijH28N7n3D
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孫⽼師情緒上的爆發，往往只需要⼀瞬間。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSiqWIjJRU
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「順便？你是在順便個甚麼啦？你真的覺得我是⼀個被你當成順便的⼯具嗎？」孫⽼師就像精神錯亂⼀樣瞬間炸開，抓住⼀個字眼借題發揮。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1c2AhfOPB3
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被氣勢壓過的林正君，由始⾄終沒有為他⾃⼰抗辯，只是在害怕地抖個不停。

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即使發生了這麼多，總會有人學不乖。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLZlBw0oDZ
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「有嗎？」⾯對孫⽼師的質疑，天才第⼀個跳出來裝傻。

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羅晨西內心的警鈴大作。

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不要質疑孫⽼師啊！363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWiwCTtcn7F
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「這就是那個甚麼，最近很流⾏的狼⼈殺！」Queenie眨眼間編了⼀個理由。

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羅晨西馬上冷靜下來。

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太好了，就順著說下去吧。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3Kuehnct6
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「對，其實有同學建議我們班會在旅⾏⽇舉辦狼⼈殺遊戲，所以我們在進⾏著情景模擬。」羅晨西趁機補充上細節，嘗試展⽰班會並⾮對旅⾏⽇毫無準備的假象。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSOj71aGAc
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「看來⼤家已經有構思過⼀些旅⾏⽇的活動建議。但你們是打算只預備⼀個活動？」孫⽼師的這個問題，令班會的眾⼈再次感受到她不好打發。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlcH4sLC3U
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Queenie⽬光別去了⼀旁，天才表⾯上還是笑嘻嘻的，林正君的眼神閃閃縮縮。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEmHC0RfxD
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羅晨西看著在恐嚇學生的孫老師。

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呃，不然你還想怎樣？真難搞。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9jNyjFKRSi
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⾒沒有⼈發⾔，孫⽼師⼜留下⼀句：「旅⾏⽇的活動時間可是很⻑的。」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRV8Abu0mzp
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這句話就像⼀道催命符，⼀下貼在⼤家的⼼上。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRgG5RucL59
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「再不給⼀些回應的話⋯⋯」遲鈍如林正君都讀懂了孫⽼師的⾔外之意。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3u3gYbMbY
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「會計，請你匯報⼀下班會現在有多少錢。」Queenie⼩⼼翼翼地說。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOMNQQnemS
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「班會的錢現時有三百三⼗塊。」天才乖乖地照做。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOuH7RLahuj
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「沒錯，這就是我們班會辦活動的資⾦。」Queenie硬著頭⽪說著。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCry7Ull3c1
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羅晨西的腦細胞急速運轉著。

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很好，先拖延時間讓我想想。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0qa4pQ5M7
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「活動分為了⼤家⼀起進⾏的活動，還有⼤家分開⾃⼰進⾏的活動。」她⼜換上了肯定的語氣，提供了⼀個討論的⽅向。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5lbstPiRW
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聽到這番話，羅晨西靈光⼀閃。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1EQkt47rd2
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「其實我們之前有請教過班上其他人，討論全班在旅遊日要做什麼活動，不過目前還沒統一意見。我想最晚後天應該能給您一個答案。」要渡過這個難關，無⾮是要讓孫⽼師認為他們已經做⾜了準備功夫。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgIWoylJdU
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這個答案，相信可以清晰展現出班會有在籌備活動上出過⼒。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd5XVzkvINa
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「明⽩了，最晚後天我要有答覆。」似乎被說服的孫⽼師站了起來，起身走向教室大門。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5telvU3cg
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看到孫⽼師要離開，班會的所有⼈都鬆了⼀⼝氣。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiBizxoizZs
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站在⾨旁，孫⽼師⼜道：「對了，聖誕聯歡會的活動也是時候要討論了。」363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1TFJ6mPmh
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「好，我們會盡快討論的了。」羅晨西禮貌地回說。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfSf9awR90
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⽼師⼀離開，所有⼈⾺上把剛才會議中抑壓的盡情宣洩出來。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc6F4NiTfni
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「無論如何，我想我們現在最重要還是要想出旅⾏⽇的活動。」等大家都發洩得差不多，羅晨西說出了重點。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mChGhK2qA
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Queenie看着現在的班會，露出欣慰的眼神。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKkztejseU
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363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7JOm1YUccJ
「後天要給答案的話，現在已經沒時間了。」羅晨西拿出⼿機，在班群打出了向其他⼈求救的信息。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcK3TJbY8F
363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbCLZZZeWh
363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUh8g63LZUn
這次的會議，只是成功拖延了時間。決定⽅案需要時間，讓同學同意⽅案同樣需要時間。這種情況下，可以直接讓所有同學參與討論的班群相信是最優解。363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm9pH3cvAVU
363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenaSIvvZRz
363Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV3HC4GGg9T
「拜託了各位，這次不要再在那邊不認真了。」羅晨西在心裡默念。

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