No Plagiarism!ZSvM39RMgKMj8kD5N3lWposted on PENANA 在那封簡訊之後,我知道有大麻煩了!8964 copyright protection150PENANAUory5SJQfV 維尼
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最近瘋狂的事情太多了,讓我壓根忘了這回事!練舞!154Please respect copyright.PENANAZHdVqLQGV0
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想到花海的情不自禁!同樣的事情不能再次發生!!154Please respect copyright.PENANAzkKM6lGaLq
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家裡什麼都有、有沙發、有床、有地板、有廚房、有浴室!8964 copyright protection150PENANARJQT2gJw1R 維尼
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還有玄關和陽台──本子的劇情點太多了!154Please respect copyright.PENANAm71Lxjxgip
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一個不小心,就會不自禁到,直接從女性朋友變女朋友!154Please respect copyright.PENANA7V7iI7YsOC
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說不定就直接一條龍到結局了!生兩個嗎?呸!!8964 copyright protection150PENANArqtrHoBC0X 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAhFIvMpVJOa
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我只好拿起手機,打給我們之中最聰明的傢伙……8964 copyright protection150PENANAfxFG5NiXAF 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANArv1Bz3Qyv4
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雖然是想過打給雨宮霞──可這畢竟是和男人的骯髒有關!8964 copyright protection150PENANApo36dTs16i 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAyUe31448V6
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嘟嘟幾聲之後,碧心勇的聲音,從話筒那一端傳出:「老耀,怎啦?」8964 copyright protection150PENANA784TRvpR38 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAEfhxfhLc4k
8964 copyright protection150PENANAYFtrMVeBCX 維尼
「呃……你知道冬季慶典吧!?」8964 copyright protection150PENANApWx9HMzdz2 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAMHauZcRMjJ
8964 copyright protection150PENANA71wIKKEZEw 維尼
「廢話,那在這地區很有名!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAChjdCewNLz 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANASsFBsODcnn
8964 copyright protection150PENANA9y5TKJVtns 維尼
「嗯……那你知道那時候要幹嘛嗎?」8964 copyright protection150PENANA0BRmdWNh5O 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAvY63BPEQ8u
8964 copyright protection150PENANAzXYUkBvuqU 維尼
「對喔,不說我都快忘了──要跳舞,跟女生。」8964 copyright protection150PENANA9wPNFRFKMD 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAkZyt8vpWy0
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「對……所以有女生要跟我跳舞,然後她有時候沒啥距離感……」8964 copyright protection150PENANAZtdfSqMeNi 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA5ITJHxVYip
8964 copyright protection150PENANAjbhxMSTKsc 維尼
電話另一頭的碧心勇:「原來如此。」,露出微笑──終於發酵到,可以烤麵包的時候了!8964 copyright protection150PENANAGeJD5s7uma 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAY2vPl9UR28
8964 copyright protection150PENANAxcF4cvQb9G 維尼
於是隔天,我來到上次那間和室──為了不再情不自禁!8964 copyright protection150PENANA5k2Ar9p14h 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAsDnOre0Piu
8964 copyright protection150PENANAsph1NLzMA8 維尼
碧心勇狐疑的問:「真不是女朋友?」8964 copyright protection150PENANA6rkbrvvg8E 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAuxdB0w5aBJ
8964 copyright protection150PENANAtum3uC62Pv 維尼
「不是……」,我也想問,可是一問的結果不是天堂就是地獄,這可賭不起!8964 copyright protection150PENANAbhY3O51eAw 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA2XIIJU1Kti
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「是女……性朋友?」8964 copyright protection150PENANAzVAp6j0i2V 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA4gSpNTsrSI
8964 copyright protection150PENANA7IQsOWcfRh 維尼
「咳咳,普通的女性朋友!」,為啥要特地強調第二個字?8964 copyright protection150PENANAHu6i7ioW1l 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAIJkVhRZhN9
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「但是,是身材很好的女……性朋友?」8964 copyright protection150PENANA0CSaHuFu4o 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAkYTpw1rXgq
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「你可以不要再延長了嗎!?雖然我很感動你難得正常,會想吐槽我。」8964 copyright protection150PENANAfEdlfvKVH9 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAMDUyZG7H4u
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「喔,好吧。時間不多,我們就來練習、如何成為真正的衣冠禽獸!」,碧心勇推出了黑板,開始教學,連幻燈片都準備好了!8964 copyright protection150PENANAAXtq1nRfG1 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAn9dWMQnJKo
8964 copyright protection150PENANA3Bm2EJAUyP 維尼
──你們肯定會覺得很扯吧?但是,碧心勇這傢伙說得沒錯!男人,都是禽獸!男子高中生是男人,所以是禽獸,這很合邏輯!8964 copyright protection150PENANAqQ9kmrdv45 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA6V0AeXRglH
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所謂禽獸,就像路邊的狗……會情不自禁、爬上另外一條狗的背上!8964 copyright protection150PENANAjsVW3LGil9 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA05KhdKDQZl
8964 copyright protection150PENANAjjyLIsG0qf 維尼
「所以,為了要駕馭你內心的野獸……」8964 copyright protection150PENANAF4uWynno6X 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAqQgpa0odUl
8964 copyright protection150PENANA9IAC5wq9rZ 維尼
──你想想看,要跟女性朋友跳舞,就不免會有肢體接觸!還會聞到她身體的香味,費洛蒙!!發情費洛蒙!有部片,就是男人被費洛蒙控制的科幻片!科幻片都是有現實基礎的!8964 copyright protection150PENANADR5YWtzAmm 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAcpoviw22wn
8964 copyright protection150PENANAW8HRgRCGEi 維尼
「我們必須要用,一大堆激烈的愛情動作……」8964 copyright protection150PENANAfw7oOpuZqb 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANApwi8xWBKpa
8964 copyright protection150PENANAHObQdgs0xE 維尼
──你還要摟著她的腰、牽著她的手,明白嗎?越說越像謎片前戲!想想看,我一碰到她的腰,一瞬間、臉變成跟那些邪教徒,一樣的猥褻大叔臉!8964 copyright protection150PENANAwb9y0gxSKp 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAqA2E4HCFVk
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然後發出嘿嘿!接入謎片段落……結局,靜香對我大失所望,以為我就跟那群邪教徒一樣渣!不可以!!絕對要防止!!8964 copyright protection150PENANAtJEWSk9hH6 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAY0mduPHyju
8964 copyright protection150PENANActEMAgoGlc 維尼
碧心勇用棍子敲了敲黑板:「說到這裡,明白了嗎?」8964 copyright protection150PENANAAHSAZ0TEdP 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANApgEGOu8Jx3
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什麼!?我不明白!看著碧心勇眉毛挑起,我忙說:「……對不起,我恍神了!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAkcI1ieHGV9 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAwKlhmJfRix
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「知錯能改,善莫大焉。那我再說一次結論──一個訓練有素的衣冠禽獸,必須要做到,就算火山在他面前爆發,也能處變不驚的程度!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAPsuu72VEpi 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA45VVwkleDD
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「原來如此!」,這真是顛覆我對衣冠禽獸的認知!!還訓練有素勒!8964 copyright protection150PENANAKdZKGtVDYU 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAN4MTygbEi4
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「就是這樣,你要知道你這次的對手!是一個不知道怎樣抓距離感的女……」,在他想要延長那個女的時候,我咳了兩聲,他才改口:「女性朋友!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAq5F40oCiJX 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAP9mcdbQtsk
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我吞了吞口水,他說得沒錯!154Please respect copyright.PENANAY7JjLImSOI
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她……是個對手!理性的對手!手都牽下去了,還沒有給我巴掌!154Please respect copyright.PENANAfHp4NIZv1A
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太沒自覺了!8964 copyright protection150PENANAJC9vZSo0ZY 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAxQe4LGcqVC
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碧心勇嚴肅問我:「我問你,女生會喜歡……表情猥褻的男生嗎?」8964 copyright protection150PENANAMHKJH4gzu4 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA4xohq4t2Q4
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「呃……不會。」,看她之前對邪教徒的態度就知道了,她說過──她最討厭死纏爛打、還會發出嘿嘿的男人!8964 copyright protection150PENANAPVVSXKU1J8 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAwDT8K10K7Q
8964 copyright protection150PENANAd2VEOTKfiE 維尼
「沒錯!如果你不想社會性死亡!」,他敲了敲黑板:「不管發生什麼事情,面對她的無自覺,就算你內心崩潰到無以復加,該硬的地方就是不能讓它硬!然後你的臉,必須要維持在溫和有禮貌的樣子──絕不能發出,猥褻嘿嘿!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAzUg7sCv48C 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA39ENcI0VPT
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這時,我突然想到一個很重要的事情:「勇……我有問題。」8964 copyright protection150PENANAKVil2z6A1Y 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAQcWDS5k2Vn
8964 copyright protection150PENANAYEs2uoSi4D 維尼
「什麼問題?」8964 copyright protection150PENANAP2SD2c965H 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAPOH0ZSOifs
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「所以,你也是稱職的衣冠禽獸?」8964 copyright protection150PENANAtF2x30H2EA 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAHBNHUDzGO4
8964 copyright protection150PENANAUwICZ8g136 維尼
「咳咳……」8964 copyright protection150PENANAQVCyscXU8n 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAJyVk6RkITs
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果然如此!找他真是找對人了,但我不能讓他難堪:「沒事!讓我們繼續!」,我明白的──男人內心中都有一頭野獸嘛!8964 copyright protection150PENANAvrSDTsJdNM 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAcdjcNxfCk4
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「很好,我個人認為你就是最欠缺這方面的功夫。」8964 copyright protection150PENANAzWgg5xswuz 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAv5oZOlySEA
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「是!」,你們聽到沒有,這傢伙說功夫耶!果然……是個衣冠禽獸!8964 copyright protection150PENANAIy1YTcbqao 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAeGJsRU46fk
8964 copyright protection150PENANAYtQ1BsOavQ 維尼
「所以你才會覺得我們都會讀心,其實你的表情,實在太骯髒、太好懂了!」8964 copyright protection150PENANA9xkGooLQRP 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA4PBui412Ie
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「是!」,我要忍啊!!好想揍他,把中古電視的故障敲好!我的表情,忍住!8964 copyright protection150PENANAz0GBvybPYj 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAtpIFps1z1B
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碧心勇認真凝視我的臉:「就是這樣!就算你想要揍我,把我打到趴在地上吃屎,但你的面容、絕對不能表現出來!明白嗎?」8964 copyright protection150PENANAYXPQdmAiRg 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAjQyu6GniT7
8964 copyright protection150PENANAz9fP0yM7Mv 維尼
「是!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAM6X4ITUKkA 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAkSDk8AFPH2
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「很好,為了今天的訓練,我跟緋火誠借了個東西,等我一下。」,碧心勇說完就走出去,不知跑去哪?8964 copyright protection150PENANA8PMYytWvAH 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAMYhBBelDnR
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我正襟危坐在和室,覺得現在火山在我面前爆發,也可以處之泰然──才怪!8964 copyright protection150PENANAxog7R0CrdL 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAjA6MUmCI1A
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因為碧心勇回來了!!扛著──普遍級不能說出之娃娃!8964 copyright protection150PENANApQaSPuXhfN 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAIjW8WzY6Ya
8964 copyright protection150PENANADYjfCw64l7 維尼
他把這玩意放在我面前,不……是我腿上:「接下來呢,你要維持這個姿勢,抓著這玩意的某些地方,然後我會開始撥放──不可名狀之幻燈片給你。你務必要成為,稱職的衣冠禽獸!」,果然瘋了……8964 copyright protection150PENANAcrYw5TqJSF 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAFjFR6AwH0S
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啪!竹竿的尖銳打在我的頭上,「眼神不要飄移!丟掉內心的羞恥!不過是區區傳教式,這就不行了?」,可惡!我還沒滿十八耶!8964 copyright protection150PENANAAp9c3JFpvX 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAClTftYdsZL
8964 copyright protection150PENANAM7Mb6pdIfg 維尼
啪!臉頰的刺痛,讓我視線重新定格在畫面上!「動作不要軟趴趴的!面對六九,就是要把頭埋在娃娃下面、視線瞪著影片──同時不能硬!」,不愧是矽膠製的……夠軟!8964 copyright protection150PENANAu9dSxlmrkj 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAYE9Hg1RhjD
8964 copyright protection150PENANAc68GYKKamj 維尼
啪!「火車便當,是進階!但你一臉就像喜歡火車便當的渣男!」,靠……這傢伙是不是趁著訓練損我!?8964 copyright protection150PENANAk8wHFDmZQw 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAXzUl5PXEwj
8964 copyright protection150PENANAbvJAF0q2pz 維尼
一段不可名狀的時間過後……碧心勇一臉嚴肅的站在黑板面前,而我已經快靈魂出竅了!8964 copyright protection150PENANA47wSPeq7fZ 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA4tQDIr2vC4
8964 copyright protection150PENANA6xz23BKTPn 維尼
他拍拍手掌:「看來你已經掌握住,身為衣冠禽獸的基本技能了!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAZjTjyKBvQI 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANApSQ0wgyMWs
8964 copyright protection150PENANAzVQDYUcD6r 維尼
這句話說完,我立刻回說:「我……不是一個普通男高中生嗎?」,還身為衣冠禽獸勒!?想拐我,沒門!8964 copyright protection150PENANABV03xrFYiW 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAmUjQjiSzUZ
8964 copyright protection150PENANAb9YXTMZias 維尼
「說話要精準!你是一個骯髒的男高中生!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAQUh6pB5d4t 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA290ItFKpkp
8964 copyright protection150PENANALeJmzyMwAQ 維尼
「……我無話可說。」,就算一開始不髒,現在全套都學了,髒爆!8964 copyright protection150PENANAxUdunlEMHl 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAL68pb8sMgQ
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「總之你已經進步了,段位從禽獸升格成衣冠禽獸了。」,我怎麼覺得沒有比較好?!是說……這東西還有段位喔!?8964 copyright protection150PENANA6LD8grvHqb 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA1LdOV1HVdC
8964 copyright protection150PENANARCdsjc8WkU 維尼
碧心勇沒注意到我內心的吐槽,他繼續說:「所以,整體上來說!你已經從一個骯髒的男高中生,成為一個──外表正常的男高中生了!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAlXCmpcUNlk 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANATf1hhFJGjC
8964 copyright protection150PENANAnPy9USPH2v 維尼
「……你說得沒錯。」,總之我升級了!8964 copyright protection150PENANAJF9ZqKz4re 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA9Yt5qg7De6
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雖然我很想反駁他的話,但是你們知道嗎……他讀不出我的想法了!平常他都會在我有骯髒的想法,立刻點破我──說我思想骯髒什麼!8964 copyright protection150PENANAkwjIYqC3aV 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAFqJq8EuGhP
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但現在他看不透啦!我銀天耀──真的成長了!8964 copyright protection150PENANASfnEXdeVCL 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAR9n43bv0Th
8964 copyright protection150PENANA6ic64SXxQT 維尼
突然,我想到一個人:「不過勇……」,就算髒了,我的內心果然還有淨土!8964 copyright protection150PENANAFg1CoEjcLU 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAafLMzmaj43
8964 copyright protection150PENANAVbiiwfJWJ3 維尼
「怎麼,從你眼中的深處,我看到你有不認同。但因為你已經是衣冠禽獸,所以你的骯髒思想、我已經感受不到了!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAjqAnqSdEGk 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAcyBQaGesna
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我咳了一下,表情依然維持溫和有禮貌:「我對我的初戀,就沒什麼骯髒的心思。」8964 copyright protection150PENANAvMUGyRqs7k 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAUxyKIipkja
8964 copyright protection150PENANAivBKcUlfH3 維尼
「你該不會真的硬不起來?」8964 copyright protection150PENANA2XYfS6y9fb 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAkA2OfeWHhW
8964 copyright protection150PENANADrB2X7lCiT 維尼
我要──溫和!有禮貌!「我是說,我對她沒什麼骯髒的想法這件事情。」8964 copyright protection150PENANAFj1qFBFdLQ 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANA8mzwZRjAuy
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勇拍了拍我的肩膀說:「吾友,那是因為……她沒法讓你硬起來!」8964 copyright protection150PENANAijVeXDJyE3 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANAm0ovBzywkw
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然後交給我一張裱起來的證書,上面寫著四個字:衣冠禽獸。8964 copyright protection150PENANAXOuuOUq3wM 維尼
154Please respect copyright.PENANARUvMd2eQli
8964 copyright protection150PENANARuteXMSgdA 維尼
於是,我畢業了──從禽獸畢業成為衣冠禽獸,還拿到證書!8964 copyright protection150PENANAPSVGH02WFi 維尼
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