向菱出教室,來到走廊上,突然就覺得南雨鎮的三月不存在春天。83Please respect copyright.PENANAKFZhDcfo0D
83Please respect copyright.PENANAEnbSCwYyN2
據說祁小波感冒了,所以向菱那天沒有陪她出去玩。83Please respect copyright.PENANAJoBMLwKI4k
83Please respect copyright.PENANAGQwpko2gx4
這事是祁澈先和她提的,那時他像是隨口一提,她點點頭,表示回應。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAZitcmgahNA
83Please respect copyright.PENANAyKdhwore30
她原本和祁小波約好要一同去公園溜滑梯的,但因為此事,也只好之後再說了。83Please respect copyright.PENANA0BxnV7I6zn
83Please respect copyright.PENANAjz0GaZjhkd
海邊小鎮的春季多雨,多雲又帶點悶熱,海浪拍打得更加兇狠,雨下得更為頻繁。83Please respect copyright.PENANAKKQMlDn023
83Please respect copyright.PENANAso5yeFPuXC
用一個字來總結就是——躁。83Please respect copyright.PENANA1KZesut6xZ
83Please respect copyright.PENANAoxbgduw5gZ
高二下學期的春天,學生們到了適合思考自己生涯的年紀。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAemsYobHc8S
83Please respect copyright.PENANAHFCfurzK5U
台上的教師總會在講課時有意無意地提起,同儕間偶爾也有討論,引起不少人開始規劃。83Please respect copyright.PENANAvNx7UPKBiw
83Please respect copyright.PENANAJY1pf7saP0
楊宛和向菱聊到這個話題時,楊宛提起了她的志向。 83Please respect copyright.PENANApeMwW3j5vZ
83Please respect copyright.PENANAzNctOL5TCw
「我故鄉那所大學的服裝設計系!」 83Please respect copyright.PENANAf9FqQIdkzR
83Please respect copyright.PENANAQyFlVq0504
幾個同班同學也跟著提出了各自的目標,似乎已經充滿鬥志。83Please respect copyright.PENANAL1kGDxseri
83Please respect copyright.PENANA9AzE4L1YqZ
某個女同學說道:「我想去北渝市!」83Please respect copyright.PENANA12jbBIPtxN
83Please respect copyright.PENANAEppjWCdG7C
另一個男同學順著她的話建議,「我也是,要不我們結伴吧?」83Please respect copyright.PENANA1OSPQ5pIp6
83Please respect copyright.PENANAQgel7fjhCZ
「哈哈哈哈你們倆還真是般配——」83Please respect copyright.PENANAnRIWwkM8zc
83Please respect copyright.PENANAVkgBAPiuqa
眾人笑鬧成一團,那對男女被同學們說得臉紅了。83Please respect copyright.PENANAj6qx9s2HT1
83Please respect copyright.PENANAX9i1r3TxoP
十七、八歲的年紀,本就應該意氣風發,昂首挺胸,耀眼熱烈。 83Please respect copyright.PENANA5rKe4xDX8d
83Please respect copyright.PENANA6Tlc3i8QN4
向菱卻是在此時變得心不在焉,默默退出了討論。 83Please respect copyright.PENANA99RawouTbQ
83Please respect copyright.PENANAIDeX0Yhf4q
她一直以來,都有些迷惘。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAJUNqsq99FH
83Please respect copyright.PENANAltdyi0OPkL
少女悄然離開剛才嬉鬧著的人群,沒有目標的閒晃,直到她莫名其妙地抵達了教室外稍遠偏僻的走廊。83Please respect copyright.PENANA6sIASim2IN
83Please respect copyright.PENANAoR7DygA338
那裡是安靜而沒有人煙的地方。 楊宛問了她不少關於將來的問題,她卻經常回答不上來。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAjhWr9nC1QV
83Please respect copyright.PENANAOQxD2nccsP
「北渝市不錯啊,而且你已經是文學界的大人物了,感覺很有前途嘛。」83Please respect copyright.PENANA1QLxzUthNY
83Please respect copyright.PENANAYj29Y6Zjfm
向菱不知道怎麼回應這種話。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAaq7o3MbMXB
83Please respect copyright.PENANAigbmunB3Kr
因為她當初會步入文學,只是為了躲避身後的經濟、心理壓力,她只是想遠離。83Please respect copyright.PENANAd5uloi9pfg
83Please respect copyright.PENANA055YpXtBBU
那時候,鄭娟因為向里的過世而開始出現異常行為,經濟困頓,她沒有專長又未達可以打工的年紀,於是只好拿出自己的興趣。83Please respect copyright.PENANAKfD67gDaIJ
83Please respect copyright.PENANAdsRuvTZz5c
結果最後越走越遠,她已經看不見家庭了。83Please respect copyright.PENANAptH1iWZjmo
83Please respect copyright.PENANAkGy6rOgHmh
自那以後,她逐漸把寫故事當成了工作,而不是原先最純粹的興趣。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAueyC7w52a4
83Please respect copyright.PENANAyf9JbTDreU
思考大綱成為習慣,那麼提筆寫作就是例行公事。83Please respect copyright.PENANA5qPKuozS9h
83Please respect copyright.PENANA2PttVRpgWE
她仍然喜歡文字,仍會從故事裡得到快樂,不過她好像成為了一個工作狂,也對這樣的現況感到迷惑。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAH9GF5dA8Ag
83Please respect copyright.PENANAh6u237q1z2
向菱覺得自己還挺矛盾的,遲遲想不通。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAeM3vhScwl0
83Please respect copyright.PENANADbdfjLkEkH
她想起前陣子,室友王曉認真問過她的話。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAZuYAIjOvWt
83Please respect copyright.PENANAXTfNLNwTJz
「你有想過未來嗎?」83Please respect copyright.PENANAz2xNCdF1ua
83Please respect copyright.PENANAvkrzSiICGJ
——怎麼想?83Please respect copyright.PENANAagQcnEqRPS
83Please respect copyright.PENANAy0sDOB5Ftx
要怎麼想,才是正確的? 83Please respect copyright.PENANABAk7ymXkHh
83Please respect copyright.PENANAj1wNz8Rhqz
她那時候沒有回應,只是勉強扯了扯唇角,以示附和。 83Please respect copyright.PENANApkx1jBjIEO
83Please respect copyright.PENANA6vAEcYC5xC
大家都具有計畫,擁有目標,唯有她卻像是迷路的小孩子似的,不知所措的站在交叉路口。83Please respect copyright.PENANAeZp8bLe2R3
83Please respect copyright.PENANA6F61GGqYPS
向菱不知道有沒有人可以來拉她一把。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAdyQIG40XvF
83Please respect copyright.PENANAceMWdXQ0iX
後來,大概又過了一段時間,文壇裡的朋友言恬,她說的話迫使少女開始直接面對另一件事。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAGjSfsO39Rs
83Please respect copyright.PENANAxG74qwPb1v
——她似乎喜歡上一個人了。83Please respect copyright.PENANAbpZUZH7En3
83Please respect copyright.PENANAjaUeK7YUbD
原來不知不覺間,她也抵達了,會因為學業和愛戀煩惱的年紀。83Please respect copyright.PENANA0OwGxL6cHb
83Please respect copyright.PENANAKhYtdUu6JT
那些事讓她愈來愈困惑,無法立即下決定但又無法乾脆割捨,陷入一種無止境的內耗裡。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAyX6gQnFQsI
83Please respect copyright.PENANALBWdgmcdJ1
這很不像向菱以往的風格,不乾脆,而且拖泥帶水。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAHUewLh8TZY
83Please respect copyright.PENANAF4bcJBNRYE
她覺得越來越看不懂自己了。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAleIHKGleTA
83Please respect copyright.PENANAGBxSvJOKMf
_ 83Please respect copyright.PENANArurfWsvBP9
83Please respect copyright.PENANA8pLD47XRTv
這麼稱呼似乎有點矯情,只不過她喜歡的人……算了,還是稱呼全名吧,祁澈。83Please respect copyright.PENANAlO3ffgM7yT
83Please respect copyright.PENANAdkzylBxwNx
——她喜歡的人,祁澈,從中午那節午休之後就消失了、再也沒回教室了。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAnXeTh2zzFD
83Please respect copyright.PENANA2P4uJRxKJp
這種事不是第一次發生了,下午時向菱問過沈中奕,對方一臉莫名的丟給她一句——你第一天認識祁澈嗎?83Please respect copyright.PENANAZ6vyAcP7Ho
83Please respect copyright.PENANAZkFYApai0s
…… 話雖如此,向菱還是有一點想找他說話。83Please respect copyright.PENANA1VwP3BtbrG
83Please respect copyright.PENANAgeIq3dXfz6
放學後,她打開手機,讓螢幕畫面在對話框裡停滯,一邊思忖著她應該說些什麼。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAGhnGWFYxGZ
83Please respect copyright.PENANA9tTEycV8KU
「祁澈。」 83Please respect copyright.PENANARNpc3InBsF
83Please respect copyright.PENANAnWBSHzYvoN
無意識的輸入了這個名字。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAZh7a4dbZkK
83Please respect copyright.PENANAPiAxwG6BBf
彷彿肢體比她先記住,這個人的身影。83Please respect copyright.PENANAhyan5FuNQg
83Please respect copyright.PENANATDI9WHKvqL
奇怪了,她又不是失戀,只是和他說話的機會減少而已,自己在發什麼神經。83Please respect copyright.PENANAc6zcvAodss
83Please respect copyright.PENANAWt58is0LOz
半個下午都過得魂不守舍,難道這個人是她過活必須的能量嗎?83Please respect copyright.PENANA4ji3c5PDbW
83Please respect copyright.PENANAIY9efqgDx0
她腹誹了一會,手動刪掉輸入框的文字,重新輸入。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAsLUBY9kjGh
83Please respect copyright.PENANAQb9ZYL4dYp
——「在嗎?」不對。83Please respect copyright.PENANAGAONVzmEyA
83Please respect copyright.PENANAyNOmRkoSOo
意圖太明顯了。83Please respect copyright.PENANA4oFT2OilEw
83Please respect copyright.PENANAFlyoonV4a3
——「你在幹麼?」也不對,這樣未免太故意了點。83Please respect copyright.PENANAvPFBcXrFAG
83Please respect copyright.PENANAxosjyjLk5G
她猶豫著要發什麼訊息,最終還是沒發,盯著那個對話框框發怔。83Please respect copyright.PENANAD0XFqFjKYn
83Please respect copyright.PENANAy0xBHcT6dW
幾分鐘後,向菱挪動指尖,點按幾下手機,忽然突發奇想決定給他取個名稱備註。83Please respect copyright.PENANA13mui1JITD
83Please respect copyright.PENANAtVRMVbDZiy
指尖在空白的名稱框裡停頓了下。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAcFFg3CHZL7
83Please respect copyright.PENANARcX0RGSfjX
然後,她沒什麼猶豫的從手機鍵盤裡戳出一個「?」,想表示神秘又行蹤不明的意味。83Please respect copyright.PENANAczFPqAwGOM
83Please respect copyright.PENANAdFKy6cSkAY
三秒鐘後又迅速刪掉,默默改成了別的內容。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAgX6p9GQ7O7
83Please respect copyright.PENANACd0sxATA0u
她怔了幾秒才按下確定按鈕,看著新備註,她突然覺得心裡樂得不行,唯一美中不足的是她有些羞恥。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAPNaX0OYk5T
83Please respect copyright.PENANAia1xyFf5B6
新備註:「我才不喜歡他」。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAaRJVD4kQjH
83Please respect copyright.PENANAr6dg3a7ADe
看著新取的備註,少女的唇角壓抑不住地往上翹。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAWpyqHgbptv
83Please respect copyright.PENANAyVP0eaDNSX
她還在傻笑,一則新訊息突然從底部彈出,對方的訊息竟然主動來了。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAJxpy1b32Uq
83Please respect copyright.PENANANcV3xJO12q
祁澈極少主動找她,所以向菱有點驚訝又有點愉悅,她點擊訊息閱讀。83Please respect copyright.PENANAnfZtACaBRb
83Please respect copyright.PENANA1KT4FOmJJ4
那封簡訊,簡單直接而且很有他的風格,只有一句「在嗎」,甚至沒有附上標點符號。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAiIQJ1PSnJw
83Please respect copyright.PENANAA9g5OGoyut
向菱本來打算秒回,但突然想起言恬的話,於是便退出聊天框,刻意延遲了幾分鐘才回覆。83Please respect copyright.PENANAPNy8hfZ1oB
83Please respect copyright.PENANAj9XS0hWMFd
……意義不明的舉動,大概只有這麼傻的人才幹得出來。83Please respect copyright.PENANAy6BhqUo174
83Please respect copyright.PENANAyOgEOMZTky
向菱:「在。」83Please respect copyright.PENANAydOq9rUAVi
83Please respect copyright.PENANA3Uocf9Trh6
突然有些好奇對方給她取什麼備註。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAz2l2IXMB2g
83Please respect copyright.PENANApmH3LukTUU
對面的訊息停頓了幾秒,像是在斟酌怎麼開始,然後才發送過來:「你在男生宿舍嗎。」83Please respect copyright.PENANA8N48B4rz3u
83Please respect copyright.PENANAf5WnlonovT
教室換座位之後,向菱還是經常找祁小波玩耍,熟悉之後變得像姊妹一般親暱。83Please respect copyright.PENANAi9WW0CBH7g
83Please respect copyright.PENANANEztGqfvIB
——只是,她很少在宿舍碰到祁澈。83Please respect copyright.PENANA75mT7P9Gmw
83Please respect copyright.PENANASh3Esqpm2n
想想也對,他似乎極為頻繁的打工。記得某天她路過魚市,碰見他在那裡幫忙一個老人將新鮮的魚隻裝進大袋子。83Please respect copyright.PENANA7xcuM8AhHm
83Please respect copyright.PENANAlgdSHgrl4C
她知道他每天固定蹺掉的那節午休,都是去給祁小波帶飯的,但這不為其他人知道。83Please respect copyright.PENANAafxO2hJWVV
83Please respect copyright.PENANAbgSOBjKLvY
向菱回覆:「祁小波感冒了啊,你早上說的,所以我今天沒過去。」83Please respect copyright.PENANAo8KZfAOGR2
83Please respect copyright.PENANAdhgK9GF1Qr
「怎麼了嗎?」她敲下這行,然後送出。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAVykh1lfbgA
83Please respect copyright.PENANAUYhLE6GiHx
訊息傳送到網路彼端,很快已讀,接著對方的文字沒幾秒又傳過來,「明天也別去那裡。」83Please respect copyright.PENANAo75rs7Yjnd
83Please respect copyright.PENANAGCX642CA7M
——向菱不懂他的意思。 83Please respect copyright.PENANACTvw7ZvnH0
83Please respect copyright.PENANAV2PW7SNW04
她用一隻手指戳出單個符號:「?」83Please respect copyright.PENANAGF4QqHzSAh
83Please respect copyright.PENANAYKB0A5cmUR
這一次,祁澈的訊息許久沒有傳來回覆,久到她差點以為他網路掉線了。83Please respect copyright.PENANAYiGpDpBG1Y
83Please respect copyright.PENANACNGpPrWCCT
從以前到現在,還是第一次出現這種情況。83Please respect copyright.PENANACUmWGHUkMz
83Please respect copyright.PENANAEQXmRmJJCx
她常和祁小波玩,他沒阻止過。她經常去男生宿舍遛達,和小女孩一起亂翻他的東西,他也沒拒絕過。83Please respect copyright.PENANAnQLtBsspUl
83Please respect copyright.PENANA8KFc6tjtyk
向菱有點錯愕,心想這人的態度轉換得有些過快。 83Please respect copyright.PENANA1eIqkJoqcr
83Please respect copyright.PENANAjymTcYhqGE
她故作玩笑的發送,「你是被盜號了?」 83Please respect copyright.PENANA54oGp2Ef69
83Please respect copyright.PENANA8DgAzI3hxZ
「沒。」否認得倒還挺快。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAa0L9vJFRgr
83Please respect copyright.PENANAHV1Z2Kfa20
「那是怎麼了?我和小波約好明天要去公園盪鞦韆的。」 83Please respect copyright.PENANADgztQsttPV
83Please respect copyright.PENANAWGQ5UGrZVr
「抱歉。」 83Please respect copyright.PENANApU5H3qyynL
83Please respect copyright.PENANASPSIQu5iqX
少女打字的手驀地僵住了。83Please respect copyright.PENANAHxWG3k9OWi
83Please respect copyright.PENANAs9wyoQMrFL
其實她的第一反應是——這傢伙居然會道歉啊?真稀奇。83Please respect copyright.PENANATLnc0ilx9f
83Please respect copyright.PENANAQK5vYFFpjr
緊接著她的思緒是這樣運轉的:等一下,他真的在道歉嗎?靠,好像是認真的,不對,他幹麼道歉?83Please respect copyright.PENANAsf5VTRcwpj
83Please respect copyright.PENANAqnPIL5jAUY
為什麼要和她說抱歉?83Please respect copyright.PENANAAJWbAWBduq
83Please respect copyright.PENANAjbGbjuYpHs
一瞬間,她的腦子像是過載了,運轉不過來,甚至倏地空白。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAqoI5EIvbwm
83Please respect copyright.PENANAJPeYgU5dRg
這算什麼,變相拒絕還是撇清關係? 83Please respect copyright.PENANAZDQFObvlKs
83Please respect copyright.PENANAktOJZwfK0R
她首先聯想到的是電視上的八點檔連續劇。83Please respect copyright.PENANA74vz9ck8Ar
83Please respect copyright.PENANArysH4Ho23z
對不起我們不要再打擾彼此了、就這樣結束吧、再這樣下去也不會有結果……為什麼她滿腦子都是這種沒梗的俗濫台詞。83Please respect copyright.PENANAQZAbm4QGp1
83Please respect copyright.PENANAPCfObgFWQD
突然就慌亂了起來。83Please respect copyright.PENANAFOAfTjjJ40
83Please respect copyright.PENANAeppC8RsgX7
但是喜歡一個人的心思,本來就是很敏感的,她知道自己反應不應該這麼大,因為一句抱歉。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAq4mZtU1QpS
83Please respect copyright.PENANAC9lRQppVfg
又或者因為失去了一種可能「巧遇」他的機會。83Please respect copyright.PENANAiEb3irRcRW
83Please respect copyright.PENANAj7fx3w3zGx
少女開始胡思亂想,腦袋一團暴亂。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAQPpt08Hez8
83Please respect copyright.PENANA7uMGafCENr
難道他已經意識到她的喜歡,於是決定開始疏遠她了嗎? 83Please respect copyright.PENANA58KfvB3fBf
83Please respect copyright.PENANAa1tuE1MWTr
她陷入一種莫名的恐慌裡,像是憑空懸浮於半空中,踩不到地板,像是失重。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAZtEN7zMVqU
83Please respect copyright.PENANADCBIANLGh7
這種感覺,一點都不踏實。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAlkHB9cQSOh
83Please respect copyright.PENANARWVNDXqSAe
_83Please respect copyright.PENANATqCxQhPLzM
83Please respect copyright.PENANA3AbVkzpfRk
窗外陰雨綿綿,烏雲潛伏在暗色裡,連消失都悄然無聲。83Please respect copyright.PENANA7hv7MeHYyz
83Please respect copyright.PENANAU5fFv6ue2O
隔天是周休,但向菱絲毫開心不起來。83Please respect copyright.PENANAvWmq34Q7Ce
83Please respect copyright.PENANADed5JDE0S1
她一旦變得鬱悶,就經常直接倒頭就睡,因為現實讓她覺得很累,睡眠做夢反倒是最好的去處。83Please respect copyright.PENANAWi8BN92S7I
83Please respect copyright.PENANAhBoTNDTXMQ
室友們見慣了她假日睡長覺的習慣,都見怪不怪,放輕了動靜,不驚擾到少女。83Please respect copyright.PENANA50284s4qrB
83Please respect copyright.PENANA4yIS8xEs3F
她睡得比平時更晚了一點。83Please respect copyright.PENANAP9JoS20deV
83Please respect copyright.PENANAeybqlrXC4H
下午起床時,她覺得胃臟空得發慌,腳步沉重虛浮,囫圇拆了幾包糖果餅乾了事。 83Please respect copyright.PENANAWhMN61SqKv
83Please respect copyright.PENANAhLTgHqDJjJ
過了一小段時間,向菱才打起精神訂外賣。83Please respect copyright.PENANAzQrY4g874k
83Please respect copyright.PENANA0Pmvif07jY
簡單而隨便的向室友們打了招呼,她覺得自己的話音有氣無力。 83Please respect copyright.PENANA9usDFWJplW
83Please respect copyright.PENANA00g3ALF5iM
半小時後,她坐在床上吃著外賣便當,一邊打開手機給言恬發訊息。83Please respect copyright.PENANAoks0QZApFy