I’m tired.549Please respect copyright.PENANAFOfmjOe1TA
If I’m honest, the days keep dragging by549Please respect copyright.PENANAyoBcNVb7SV
and my feet are sliding across the floor instead549Please respect copyright.PENANAiUJskQNot9
of lifting with each step because I can’t find the energy549Please respect copyright.PENANAE6at57TsI0
to pick them up and set them back down.549Please respect copyright.PENANAl6pXF2MLgt
Some people turn and ask me to stop scuffing549Please respect copyright.PENANARiXj2KZMp7
my feet on the floor, please lift them up and walk549Please respect copyright.PENANAPN5Nqv6DEq
like a normal person, thank you.549Please respect copyright.PENANATSWzEDGiy9
I try.549Please respect copyright.PENANAjVkKSZqe6m
I try everyday to lift myself up and keep walking549Please respect copyright.PENANAn5wrjzdpuf
but like my feet, I am scuffing across the ground549Please respect copyright.PENANAd02GyM33tv
just barely making it from one place to another549Please respect copyright.PENANAXhZ4bdlahe
without damage.
I’m tired.549Please respect copyright.PENANAwyOGOYhhkb
Just this Wednesday I was driving home549Please respect copyright.PENANAe5O77OZ5tq
on the highway, 480 West from Brookpark Road549Please respect copyright.PENANAZp2Or0Aln0
where the RTA takes me to Cleveland for classes, and549Please respect copyright.PENANAqv1s1bgTRh
during the drive, I couldn’t focus on the road before me549Please respect copyright.PENANA3vDPVyZ9Jp
because the news that Trump had won left me shaken549Please respect copyright.PENANAMnmbHCpftC
for those I’m not sure how to help549Please respect copyright.PENANAFNv7Xi4wSB
when I’ve been given a privilege I didn’t ask for.549Please respect copyright.PENANAAO2RE2rHqm
And while I was driving down the highway549Please respect copyright.PENANA2i0q0xxSiz
I contemplated the notion of jerking the wheel549Please respect copyright.PENANAd8unmxlgfm
to the left and letting my car hit the divide between the549Please respect copyright.PENANAIxzmZP0Bve
highway East and the highway West; allow myself to549Please respect copyright.PENANAzVMkf17vbw
collide with the wall, break through and destroy549Please respect copyright.PENANA8FWwexlt0j
the other side.549Please respect copyright.PENANA7KMAerEGKf
Then, I contemplated jerking the wheel to the right549Please respect copyright.PENANAMbYDTTcASf
into the ditch along the grass so I wouldn’t549Please respect copyright.PENANA2ZFIerr7BW
harm anyone else in the process. But I549Please respect copyright.PENANARKssNzcFVf
didn’t do either, even though I549Please respect copyright.PENANA1F4Dig1GUo
got so scared for a minute549Please respect copyright.PENANA9lLAurGBkC
that I would.
I’m tired.549Please respect copyright.PENANAi3mZYkaT4M
Last year on August 22nd, my birthday, I had a similar549Please respect copyright.PENANAOciQbOPtaK
reaction to suicidal thoughts. I had a rough549Please respect copyright.PENANABkBBYi6Cvo
birthday; I worked, I was lonely, I felt549Please respect copyright.PENANARg97Fmq5Bk
pathetic, worthless, uncared for and forgotten549Please respect copyright.PENANA0N0yrvxrNX
so I took the sharpest and largest kitchen knife549Please respect copyright.PENANAIOA9FThPMU
and I pressed the tip of it to my chest, above my heart549Please respect copyright.PENANAXCVlDQn7Bo
and sobbed until I couldn’t sob anymore.549Please respect copyright.PENANAfWju6zG37v
I did not press the sharp edge deep enough to549Please respect copyright.PENANAus9Ia4wMJW
draw blood, but it was the first time549Please respect copyright.PENANAvAb1ZIEHzR
I had allowed myself to549Please respect copyright.PENANAdWjj1goXX9
get so close to the temptation.
I’m tired.549Please respect copyright.PENANAHCae8nPDEc
I say that I want to die a lot, even though I never549Please respect copyright.PENANA8J4ahpJmYc
actually reach out and go through with it549Please respect copyright.PENANAxJru4CezBr
I think because I’m afraid of not existing549Please respect copyright.PENANA1eRcHpXtSF
just as I’m afraid of existing. And lately I549Please respect copyright.PENANAjyJZnMHVav
have people who reach out to me when I’m not sure549Please respect copyright.PENANAL8gKxNp6Wi
how to reach out to them, and it’s sweet to have people549Please respect copyright.PENANARxk5C9fHec
support me, but I go right back to wanting to isolate myself549Please respect copyright.PENANAsLk1mV3U08
and give up. I have thought about dying every day549Please respect copyright.PENANAJM54MEfdua
for the last few weeks and I wish I could just549Please respect copyright.PENANA69no8nFAnV
go through with it.
I’m tired.549Please respect copyright.PENANAVGZ47CAoxc
I’m so tired of being forgotten, of arguing549Please respect copyright.PENANALdkhu2VTnJ
for people to care about me when they should549Please respect copyright.PENANAnWRNT7sM7N
care about me on their own. I often think that549Please respect copyright.PENANAv3cQzFMF0L
I should just stop putting in such an effort for those that549Please respect copyright.PENANA7LKqCKIWgs
do not consider me, but I can’t seem to stop caring.549Please respect copyright.PENANAVbMmRp9cuX
She often hurts me more than she improves my life549Please respect copyright.PENANA7ws7yzUDY1
but I’m too afraid to say anything because549Please respect copyright.PENANAnXT62YPtSN
I need her. I need her to exist549Please respect copyright.PENANAadbATogisI
in my existence, and I need her to549Please respect copyright.PENANABMhgTM4lPh
be by my side.549Please respect copyright.PENANAie6x4cDE5Z
But I’m tired.
I’m tired549Please respect copyright.PENANA9eXkhjhQyo
of being tired549Please respect copyright.PENANAFHkonxcDUM
in this tiring life.