日正當空,湖面蒸氣騰升,空氣濕翳悶侷。旅客遊湖興致大減,看見湖側小艇租賃店的殘破裝潢,僅餘的愉悅心情消磨殆盡。304Please respect copyright.PENANAU821h3mZuM
304Please respect copyright.PENANAAtVvBMFOqz
四十年前,他一手創立這曾經輝煌一時的小艇租賃店。哪個他?就是那個身穿發黃白色背心、正在店內老舊梳化上打盹的瘦削老頭。304Please respect copyright.PENANADeopbSJj6R
304Please respect copyright.PENANAJVCkSSAxQB
一個女人走入店內,輕推他的臂膀,硬生打斷他夢中的快樂家庭生活。「先生,我來租小艇的。」304Please respect copyright.PENANAW0iifJFDVZ
304Please respect copyright.PENANA5YL9JLrbbz
他氣得想要破口大罵,但千萬粗言穢語最終化成一聲不耐煩的嘆息示現人前。嶙峋雙手硬撐身子坐起來,乾癟雙腳好不容易才成功對準、穿上拖鞋,以飄落黃葉似的搖曳步姿走到櫃檯,拿出簇新的黑色硬皮簿。「這裡。填資料。」304Please respect copyright.PENANAmYA6eYDUiZ
304Please respect copyright.PENANAGjetp5mKER
「嗯。」女人察覺硬皮簿的簇新與店面的陳舊裝潢格格不入,估計是剛剛更換不久,證明店舖不缺客人。面前的酒鬼應該活得不錯,如果他沒有花太多錢在酒水的話。「填好了。」304Please respect copyright.PENANArkL4kX9nMU
304Please respect copyright.PENANATgqc9MSR0v
他匆匆收起硬皮簿,沒有瞥望資料一眼。收下按金,三言兩語粗疏講解船槳的使用方法和救生衣的位置後,馬上領著女人前往三號小艇的所在。304Please respect copyright.PENANAKQ8rdQcY6S
304Please respect copyright.PENANAspAULM7jfQ
「有關救生衣的使用方法,自己看說明書。」他打個呵欠,彷彿剛才的一連串工作已然耗盡畢生精力。304Please respect copyright.PENANAKc9jGT8Arp
304Please respect copyright.PENANAlDKUP7PEon
「嗯。」女人不介意他的粗魯無禮,幽幽目送他微駝背影遠去不復見。304Please respect copyright.PENANATDvgeErlSE
女人沒有歸還小艇。他想報警,可恨營商牌照早已被吊銷,實在報不得警。恨得牙癢癢的,只好買醉洩憤。304Please respect copyright.PENANAsWfQbBFYSy
304Please respect copyright.PENANAnPwoLUb290
醉。忘了恨,忘了痛。304Please respect copyright.PENANAVLwNTdhiqU
304Please respect copyright.PENANAcVmEuaDa2j
妻女的離開是他畢生最痛。明知她們恐懼自己酒後的狂態,奈何他真的十分需要酒精——打理生意不容易,無數問題只得他一人去處理。壓力大,失眠,唯有栽進酒水裡求安寧。304Please respect copyright.PENANAoQaHgwEoY2
304Please respect copyright.PENANAqgJMBheLLj
安寧日子終於到來。304Please respect copyright.PENANAVC3bMz4xte
304Please respect copyright.PENANAxIB2qAMLkg
妻女離家出走後,家裡沒有半點生氣,死寂氣氛沉重得令人窒息。他憤怒,他難過,他不明白自己為養家奔波勞碌多年有何價值。沒有尋找二人,沒有繼續拼盡全力打理生意。得過且過。有錢買酒就可以,有酒尋夢就可以,有夢安家就可以。夢裡的家,有他有妻有女……304Please respect copyright.PENANAtKeMp8dVWs
304Please respect copyright.PENANAx27ePpXbhl
一名警員輕推他的臂膀,硬生打斷他夢中的快樂家庭生活。「先生,我們需要你就一宗命案到警署協助調查。」304Please respect copyright.PENANA2tkmti59tu
「爸:304Please respect copyright.PENANAH8zxvyeKhS
304Please respect copyright.PENANAP31KeZyEyY
三個月前,我跟丈夫離婚,兒子撫養權歸他。一個月前,媽急病離世。304Please respect copyright.PENANArHGAlJ7pWB
304Please respect copyright.PENANAYzIW7q4yI6
我不知道自己該要為何活下去——我在乎的人全都離我而去。若說將來會遇到更多在乎的人,他們終歸離我而去,不是嗎?304Please respect copyright.PENANAFugPWaWLhh
304Please respect copyright.PENANATuWGN1zkNH
被遺棄的滋味十分熬人。我驀地想起你,被我和媽遺棄的你。304Please respect copyright.PENANAkDQN4atszL
304Please respect copyright.PENANA3F9MN0giBX
你活得好嗎?有否掛念我和媽?你會因我們的離開而反省和戒酒嗎?304Please respect copyright.PENANAxGxCRRvrIZ
304Please respect copyright.PENANARbMZyi9CMC
二十多年來,我們的生活尚算可以,苦樂參半。奈何無論時日如何流逝,我們偶爾仍會想起你。無可否認,你是我們生命的一部分。否定你,就是否認我們生命的一部分。即使懼怕你,我們仍然希望你活得好,證明我們的生命曾經很好。304Please respect copyright.PENANArGaJe4bL8j
304Please respect copyright.PENANAa8ktcC6ROt
媽已然沒機會知道你活得可好——這是插在我心裡的一根刺。304Please respect copyright.PENANAvCX6eqPFOK
304Please respect copyright.PENANANcs52eAWK0
踏上回憶中的道路,我來到湖邊。想要看看你,卻又害怕看見你。想跟你相認,卻又害怕被你認出。如果你認出我、喚我的名字,我會捨不得去死嗎?不知道,因為你認不出我。304Please respect copyright.PENANAkLKLwAKdGF
304Please respect copyright.PENANAdTpwLZDLYo
我在硬皮簿如實寫上名字,你沒有看。我反倒覺得釋懷——一直猶豫該否自殺,一直幻想你勸阻我的情境,一直誤會世上仍有人會捨不得我……但原來是我想多了,世事從來很簡單。304Please respect copyright.PENANAF8vSQacHHo
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就這樣吧。我累了。304Please respect copyright.PENANA6KzSQCCmlx
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永別!304Please respect copyright.PENANAm2S7WkKImx
304Please respect copyright.PENANAUc7l1zagwS
女兒上」304Please respect copyright.PENANAeeRvXnHZct
夜,無月無星,只有店門前的一盞黃光大燈照亮湖面一隅。風吹,水面輕皺,大燈的倒影隨之輕晃輕動。304Please respect copyright.PENANAKpHI8TTNcg
304Please respect copyright.PENANAnDtHb1AZYL
很美。有如久遠記憶中的女兒,妸娜多姿,輪廓分明。304Please respect copyright.PENANA0Y8N7RFXSh
304Please respect copyright.PENANADejDchehjJ
手裡的啤酒罐清空了。他用力將空罐扔向大燈的倒影,倒影被空罐泛起的水花打亂本身的晃動節奏,散了、碎了。以為稍等數分鐘後湖面就可以重歸原樣,不,那突如其來的空罐仍在水面中或浮或沉,持續泛起無數大大小小的漣漪。304Please respect copyright.PENANAhq1Y4yQNDq
304Please respect copyright.PENANASoePrSRB4y
不美。有如殮房中的女兒,屍身發脹,面目全非。304Please respect copyright.PENANAmMtR3URhsr
304Please respect copyright.PENANANqXmyf5Niz
「我在乎的人全都離我而去……他們終歸離我而去……」女兒在遺書裡無意間吐露出他多年的心聲。「我不知道自己該要為何活下去……」304Please respect copyright.PENANAonnCmVTyO2
304Please respect copyright.PENANAJsTBnEUr5J
他又喝完一罐啤酒,再次將它扔向湖面。一罐復一罐,浮浮復沉沉。後來他乾脆省下喝酒的時間,直接將未開封的啤酒罐扔進湖面。啤酒罐被丟光以後,沙灘椅、戶外摺枱、櫃檯的硬皮簿、電話、文具、錢箱、身上的拖鞋、白色背心、運動短褲、內褲相繼遭殃。304Please respect copyright.PENANA0S2UaZ1ggg
304Please respect copyright.PENANAJFj26aQg2q
愧疚難當——如果自己當時認出女兒,或許她不會自殺!304Please respect copyright.PENANADUKN4MPhdJ
304Please respect copyright.PENANA7P6Z3vuDXH
赤條條的他倏忽縱身躍入水裡。寒意徹骨。水質混濁,視野模糊。無視危險,他游向多件漂浮雜物,逐件將它們拾回岸上。看見岸上雜物在自己的努力下慢慢增多,東歪西倒堆疊一起,他心裡更覺踏實,生起奇異的安寧。304Please respect copyright.PENANAvR7VR8BjP7
304Please respect copyright.PENANANXQL724GD2
他哭了。304Please respect copyright.PENANAh7hRsYmBdL
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為何而哭?為誰而哭?不知道。304Please respect copyright.PENANAMND5fjYjRg
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不要問,不打算知道。304Please respect copyright.PENANAjfR8VvERTA
304Please respect copyright.PENANAzqag2x1zsJ
他游回岸邊,軟癱地上,粗喘聲中仰望夜空。304Please respect copyright.PENANACvYWkbGlqR
304Please respect copyright.PENANAQdD9S33OuR
筋疲力竭,必須休息。304Please respect copyright.PENANAL2d6tDSs5Q
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不。尚有要事未辦。304Please respect copyright.PENANAKIm3frGBcm
304Please respect copyright.PENANATjhSw2eGx2
他用盡力氣爬向雜物堆,抽出一罐未開封的啤酒。304Please respect copyright.PENANAmLXjMwakex
304Please respect copyright.PENANA1Rus9HTFXK
咔——304Please respect copyright.PENANAFCc0cUp8DG
304Please respect copyright.PENANA3tYqNCShdh
骨碌骨碌骨碌——304Please respect copyright.PENANAjIIbGwxMXm
304Please respect copyright.PENANAYbDrBg7E0b
嗄——304Please respect copyright.PENANAauISA5fjtj
304Please respect copyright.PENANAkG1zJoOpos
人生,但願如此。