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🌪
王一博今天心情炸裂,帥氣冷臉直接甩在了會議室那群迷妹面前,毒舌一句懟完,轉身就走,乾淨俐落,帥得像拍電影退場畫面。
但——219Please respect copyright.PENANARKvLNiAtHc
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其實這都怪二天前那該死的連鎖事故。
⏪ 兩天前,災難開始倒計時
王一博冷著臉,一邊拿著手機開黑,一邊無語吐槽。
219Please respect copyright.PENANAUosy5vmmL3王一博:“我去!二爺別浪,小心又落地成盒——苟住,穩住別慌!你要出圈啦——戰哥快去扶!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAk8QaU4WSJF
即使王一博身經百戰,依舊敵不過隊友二爺那神一樣的手殘操作。三人成功團滅,集體成盒,氣得王一博當場爆粗:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAmFvlaEYry9“姓張的!再帶你吃雞我就是棒槌!!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAtw28ZOepbO
——219Please respect copyright.PENANAGmbCwC2z3z
219Please respect copyright.PENANAN95EQgBn8c
補充背景:219Please respect copyright.PENANA006woK1mKI
219Please respect copyright.PENANA2GhifMua4L
其實王一博不是冷臉王,他是慢熱型社恐小社牛。219Please respect copyright.PENANA4B5qBwYqhl
219Please respect copyright.PENANAcQovLqEDJn
對熟人會嗨,對外人禁欲冷漠,熟人面前話癆+吐槽王。
這次連續熬夜兩天打遊戲,他累癱了。
☠ 睡神剛剛入眠,命運開始捉弄他
打完遊戲,王一博帥氣撂下一句:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAxzXah02tJp“戰哥我睡了,別再帶二爺了,你拖不動老古董!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAYRp6nFtvtf
結果——
他從早上九點一口氣睡到下午四點,眼看著能躺屍續命,忽然——
越洋電話響了。
看到來電人那串熟悉的“哈福橋斯教授”,王一博那股起床氣瞬間憋回肚子裡去,還得強裝乖巧開口:
219Please respect copyright.PENANA03QTdz7NJA“Hello
Prof您說啥?”219Please respect copyright.PENANA4N4oZp4pfQ
結果那老頭全程用「我很自豪我中文說得好」的標準雞同鴨講,說了一堆王一博連蒙帶猜的中英夾雜版亂碼。
好不容易總算聽懂了重點——
有人寫了篇潦草手寫的醫學心得,還用篆書繁體寫的。
外國醫學界大佬們直接全員原地爆炸:
「這寫的啥?」219Please respect copyright.PENANA0RJ0HUD0Gb
219Please respect copyright.PENANACVRjmLYrre
「這是古文嗎?」219Please respect copyright.PENANAqYYHvxS0k4
219Please respect copyright.PENANAgIJaN2NELr
「能不能叫你學生幫忙翻譯啊?」
——219Please respect copyright.PENANA5hx2X9LWzc
219Please respect copyright.PENANA6hQJ1EoXoc
最後的救命差事,自然落到了哈福橋斯唯一華國得意門生王一博頭上。
當王一博硬著頭皮研究那篇手寫篆書,看懂內容後,只想罵髒話:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAt84kj7KqPL“這位醫學界大佬,純屬無聊人上人,純耍人玩!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAv852qcjCqm
王一博翻譯完這篇謎之心得,已經是第二天凌晨兩點。
他倒頭就睡,心裡暗暗發誓:
「天王老子來了也別想吵醒我!」
結果——三秒鐘後,手機又響了。219Please respect copyright.PENANAQ63HWzBZw6
219Please respect copyright.PENANA2zX01E8acr
來電顯示:孫子。
肖戰來了。
☎ 肖戰出場:萬年禍害
王一博頂著半死不活的理智接起:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAxNaq1lKNGc肖戰那頭元氣滿滿:“崽ㄦ啊~~”219Please respect copyright.PENANAdv8DsHAeqO
219Please respect copyright.PENANA2JJblv2sMJ“你那條寶貝魚突然掉鱗啦!可能要禿,快來看最後一面!”219Please respect copyright.PENANA2FbBAPO1E9
219Please respect copyright.PENANAmU0THiRftc“放心,它還有口氣!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAwqrbacnToT
王一博瞬間黑臉:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAPdAvC0XFKw“哥,親哥!你老實交代!你對我的魚做了什麼?我保證不生氣。”219Please respect copyright.PENANAwwMOt0aoBg
肖戰語氣無辜:
219Please respect copyright.PENANA59zcYBMfCQ“昨天人家送我兩條風水魚,虎頭跟紅血龍,看牠們可愛嘛,就跟你的魚放一起了……”219Please respect copyright.PENANAa18BA0pNTA
結果現在,你的寶貝魚快禿了。
219Please respect copyright.PENANAAQwRYROWAU王一博:“……你把食肉魚和錦鯉放一池子裡養??!!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAYQtEwQ5pMu
怒氣值爆表的王一博當即衝去寵物中心——
🐟 實地探查:全是假警報!
結果到現場,發現魚群活得比他還精神,在水裡快樂吐泡泡。
肖戰人也不見了。
王一博氣到內傷,冷臉坐進館長辦公室,咬牙打電話:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAOAU9VZXRhP王一博:“你人在哪?”219Please respect copyright.PENANAjPBYpODxQJ
肖戰語氣淡定:
219Please respect copyright.PENANARcu4WeQDJp“在家啊~”219Please respect copyright.PENANAHTJ19NP7e4
王一博咬牙:
219Please respect copyright.PENANAfbmfqWSpdF“你再說一次試試看。”219Please respect copyright.PENANAEeC5WZAPWq
這時肖戰語氣一轉,裝認真:
219Please respect copyright.PENANA0Tf3ohVN3i“我受傷了,手破了個口子,必須在家休養幾天。”219Please respect copyright.PENANAFHEHGRS8pb
219Please respect copyright.PENANA9omh1S3P6l“早上切火腿的時候切破皮了,真可怕!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAo3utD0fyN7
王一博:“……”
——219Please respect copyright.PENANAA0jCI5O0PI
219Please respect copyright.PENANAyw4uublU0t
肖戰此時還想裝可憐裝病假,想讓王一博幫忙頂班。
王一博沉聲威脅:
219Please respect copyright.PENANA8BziRvqHld“再不來,你後院那顆快成材的樹,就保不住了。”219Please respect copyright.PENANAazePQADNnK
肖戰秒慌:
219Please respect copyright.PENANA8lyEnMHJxb“崽兒啊!別衝動!我馬上來上班啊!”219Please respect copyright.PENANAF3U6gHoyVw
📢
王一博起床氣尚未平息,結果今天在會議室,誰都別想討他好臉色看。
——219Please respect copyright.PENANAVHokTiNZhh
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