「無論你如何糟蹋自己,他亦不會起死回生。倒不如好好活下去,別讓大家擔心。」母親痛心流淚,語重深長勸勉她堅強活下去。185Please respect copyright.PENANAeBcVbPTiDr
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「如果死去的是爸爸,你能夠若無其事好好活下去嗎?」她反問,因為她和母親的性格一模一樣。185Please respect copyright.PENANAtXDZrbbXYe
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母親理解,哀嘆,見她心意已決,沒再勸說。185Please respect copyright.PENANAjWtw3KvrYM
185Please respect copyright.PENANA6OnSKQpV4c
她十日無眠。生理時鐘錯亂,頭暈,頭痛,作嘔。精神紊亂,抑鬱,躁狂,幻覺。185Please respect copyright.PENANAlOAoAJhlVX
185Please respect copyright.PENANA1Mz5Mo00yg
丈夫遇害情景不斷重現眼前。185Please respect copyright.PENANAXa3XShbtEB
185Please respect copyright.PENANAlNYZHzk1hG
陸上巨獸突襲,揚起大把沙子模糊大家視線,飛擲幾片尖石無差別攻擊大家。親友四散逃命,只有被尖石傷及的幾個原地倒下。有的一命嗚呼,有的不省人事,有的與我丈夫一樣,在意識清醒的情況下被折斷四肢、被灌石入胃、被荊棘吊死。最後頸項不勝體內石子重量,身首分離……185Please respect copyright.PENANAWdcvrpPlT8
185Please respect copyright.PENANASmPAYN55UU
我不停重覆經歷丈夫慘死情景。幻覺之中,我毫不察覺一切既成事實,絞盡腦汁想要救出丈夫。或是刺穿巨獸腳踝關節,或是衝前啄走巨獸眼睛,或是攻擊巨獸頸側動脈。可惜統統失敗,丈夫終究在我面前痛苦離世。185Please respect copyright.PENANAu4WnrImkSa
185Please respect copyright.PENANAuH0H9o76JH
偶爾頭腦清醒過來,意識到事實和真相,怒火只會燒得更旺盛。這些日子,我被大家反鎖房內。我明白,大家擔心我會去找巨獸報仇,而他們是對的——我時刻在心底盤算報仇之計。185Please respect copyright.PENANA6ocXX4syRV
185Please respect copyright.PENANAZGBnRseHHF
第一步,逃走。我趁機攻擊送來食物的母親,離開居所。鄰居發現狀甚癲狂的我,紛紛走避,沒敢攔路。我暢通無阻地來到湖邊,游離家園,前往丈夫遇襲地方。185Please respect copyright.PENANAOBExomXyKb
185Please respect copyright.PENANAztqCfIMis3
第二步,埋伏。我長草密雜之處搭建一個簡陋的藏身所,等候巨獸到來。巨獸經常在此出沒,但少有大規模殘殺平民——牠們對湖裡的魚較有興趣。我見過巨獸捉魚。牠們不吃魚,多以玩弄心態對待魚的身心和生命。我偶爾從親友口中聽聞過湖中魚兒的慘況,不少因為受驚過度或是掙扎求生時傷重身亡。那時我隔岸觀火,誰料如今身受其害。185Please respect copyright.PENANA5psfAXZnYA
185Please respect copyright.PENANA8ODXymZTic
埋伏是一個漫長的痛苦過程。需要時刻保持隱匿狀態,但我時而失常,深陷幻覺之中。我提醒自己,眼前景物盡是假象,除非……185Please respect copyright.PENANAjTi5qRnzYu
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金睛火眼。185Please respect copyright.PENANAiKaBPDF9ma
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藍天白雲,和煦日照,綠草如茵,清澈湖水。原本是世外桃源的美麗地方,在我眼裡是無間地獄。巨獸時有經過,或老或壯或嫩,卻不是我的報仇對象。日轉星移,那可惡的傢伙尚未現身。我啄食剛捉來的魚兒,血腥味道使我在現實與虛幻之間徘徊不定。185Please respect copyright.PENANABqJUMAcdUS
185Please respect copyright.PENANA4TXrM4Qrgc
魚兒是真是假?長草是真是假?迎面而來的巨獸是真是假?捉住我的巨獸大手是真是假?185Please respect copyright.PENANAy9bq3xJmip
185Please respect copyright.PENANAmDt9eOkEUJ
「看!我又捉到一隻雀!我在書本上見過圖片,這是鴛鴦的『鴦』!」一隻稚嫩的巨獸提起我雙翼,興奮向同伴炫耀。185Please respect copyright.PENANASkyu60nri6
185Please respect copyright.PENANAtLGR8VROzQ
這氣味!是牠!每隻動物都有獨一無二的體味,我肯定這就是我要找的巨獸!185Please respect copyright.PENANAqiZr3Dwacz
185Please respect copyright.PENANA4s6iZhm2uZ
怒火攻心。我轉頭狠狠咬斷牠手指。牠痛極把我往大樹使勁擲去。我連忙拍翼高飛,看清地面情況後俯身衝前啄走巨獸一隻眼睛。牠的同伴被嚇得不輕,逕自跑走。正合我意。再一個俯衝,巨獸失去了另一隻眼睛。我接連來回,在牠身上各個位置啄出不少血洞。牠的活動能力被削弱,將近無力反抗或逃跑。我準備好作出再後一擊——攻擊牠的頸側動脈。185Please respect copyright.PENANA9KydWqdemI
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呯——185Please respect copyright.PENANAxkg0IwsLIl
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不明東西從樹後飛射穿過我身體。我應聲墜地,血流如注。185Please respect copyright.PENANAGlnd20IwWD
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兩隻強壯巨獸從樹後跑出,經過我身邊,直奔向年幼巨獸。185Please respect copyright.PENANAJjY1xWanlq
185Please respect copyright.PENANAOdNObiQkaZ
「不用怕!爸媽在!千萬不要閉眼!」牠倆強忍淚水,連聲安慰,抱著小巨獸跑走。185Please respect copyright.PENANA4zqPNMvPg6
185Please respect copyright.PENANATvnPFqTg3e
藍天白雲,和煦日照,綠草如茵,清澈湖水。在這原本是世外桃源的美麗地方,我驀地憶起父母。如果他們看見我奄奄一息,肯定會同樣悲傷。185Please respect copyright.PENANAaouH0N6qQP
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但我不後悔。185Please respect copyright.PENANAFlrmQbzCgE
*卯:有茂盛之意,因此亦指草木覆蓋地面的狀態。185Please respect copyright.PENANAXWn40JNXn9
*此篇將會收於短篇小說合集《雜念集》
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