Have you ever experienced the moment where you just had a fight with a friend but then they continue to talk to talk to you as if it never happened? Usually you are still mad at that person, so you really don’t want to speak to them. I believe that that those people could never be true friends; they are only pretending to like you for their own selfish needs. Naturally, I realised this too late, but that is another story.
“So where is your sister?” Racheal asked annoyingly. I sighed; I was defiantly in no mood to keep up with casual conversations.
“Why does everyone seem only interested in my sister?” I exaggerated.
Ignoring my comment, Racheal moved her chair closer to mine with her usual I-know-all-so-tell-me-all grin. I sighed again.
“my mother took her out shopping to get some new clothes” I said looking at her as if I actually cared about the conversation, “I mean, who pops out of nowhere and only has one outfit?!”
“Ooh, I’m detecting a bit of jealousy” Racheal cooed.
“I’m not…” I lied, “besides you saw the way she behaved”
At that moment Jayden walked into the classroom. I went silent as I watched him walk to his usual seat. I couldn’t believe that it had only been one week in that very class room of colourful walls and broken windows that Jayden got me the lead in the musical. To think that only a week later he would refuse to talk to me became unbearable.
“So it’s true then” Racheal said with a surprisingly sympathetic tone, "you guys really aren’t speaking to each other.
“Yeah…” I sighed, feeling a little shocked. Even though we were supposedly friends, I didn’t know it was in Racheal’s nature to care about people’s emotions. Or perhaps it was my own anger towards her that made me feel that way.
The bell rang and class began.
“So everyone how is our musical coming along?” Miss Haldom asked. The class went silent. Not much had occurred since the last class and no one wanted to announce the bad news. However, Miss Haldom realised what the silence meant.
“Hazel, could you please show the class your progress.”
I jumped and blushed. Although I was confident with the song, I was certainly not ready to perform in front of the whole class. Ever since I could remember, even the clouded memories of my life before the grave, I found that I had always been shy. Shaking I slowly rose from my seat.
*
The entire class room broke into applause. I blinked twice, I couldn’t remember performing. It was as if my body went into this trance as soon as I got out of my seat. I smiled; it felt good to be in the spotlight. I bowed and quietly returned to my desk. Miss Haldom came up to me in relief.
“Thank you Hazel, here is the opening number. See how well you can do in learning it before rehearsals at lunch.”
She set the paper on my desk, sheet music labeled ‘Once upon a December”
I looked at my talk for a moment. Somehow I had this feeling that I had sung it before. I shook my head as the bell rang. Not long afterwards Alice, who I didn’t even notice was in class, came up to me.
“Hey Hazel…” Alice asked hesitantly, “do you know that all the boys talk about you behind your back?”
“w-what do they say?” I stuttered in surprise.
Alice looked around quickly to see who was around and whispered in my ear. “About how they want to make love to you”
“Whaa?!” I exclaimed turning a deep shade of red.
“Now that I think of it they always stare at you like sex animals” Racheal butted in, “but I don’t know why they would rather have sex with you than with me”
“W-w-why didn’t you tell me?!” I stuttered, completely embarrassed.
Racheal shrugged, “You know, you better be careful, with valentines coming up they might try to make a pass at you”
Completely embarrassed about the topic I quickly jumped out of my seat. “I-I-I have to go!” I felt as red as a tomato as I ran out of the classroom. ‘There is no way it could happen’ I kept saying to myself over and over again. Not looking what was in front of me I ran into a group of boys.
“I’m Sorry” I said bowing. I didn’t know why I bowed but it seemed like a natural concept due to my mother’s expectations.
“Hazel!” they all called in a creepily simultaneous manner, “will you be my Valentine?”
I blushed as their faces went from creepy to scary. Thinking about what Alice and Racheal said I darted away from them.
“Hey Hazel wait for us!” the group called simultaneously again.
It was a never ending cycle. I kept running and they kept chasing me. For years no boys ever had an interest in me and now I was overloaded with them. The more I thought about it the more I blushed.
Why can’t this be like an anime where I continue running but someone saves me by pulling me into a cupboard? I thought.
Funnily enough that was exactly what happened. Someone grabbed me by the hand and pulled me into a nearby classroom. We listened in silence as the boys ran past. I looked up to thank my savior to realise that it was Jayden, who was holding me extremely close. I blushed even more.
“Are you okay?” he asked not looking at me.
Words couldn’t come to my mouth so I simply nodded my head.
We stood in silence, standing close to each other until Jayden cleared his throat and moved away.
“Now once you’ve finished mucking around, we have a rehearsal to get to” he said as he grumpily walked away.
*
‘Hazel, are you ready for the opening number”
I stood on the stage with the curtain closed and sighed. It was my chance to shine.
“Yes” I called closing my eyes. The opening song still seemed familiar to me personally. Not only did I know the lyrics and the musical it came from really well I felt as if I had sung the song before. The music began. I still felt anxious even though it was only a rehearsal. The curtains slowly rose as I began to sing.
‘Dancing bears
Painted wings
Thing I almost remember
And a song someone sings
Once upon a December’
The world around me became a blur as an image of a ball room came into view. I saw myself as a ten year old girl, with thousands of people dancing to my song. I could see gene swaying in front of me giving me a gentle smile. The world seemed peaceful and beautiful that I closed my eyes and sang with all my heart.
‘Far away long ago
Burning dim as an ember
Things my heart used to know
Things it yearns to remember’
The image began to fade and I was left in the darkness as the final words left my mouth leaving nothing but a dull ring in my ears.
And a song someone sings
Once upon a December
‘Hazel! Hazel! Can you hear me!” a voice called. My eyes weakly opened to see a blurred image of Jayden kneeling towards me. As my surroundings became clearer I noticed that I was sitting crossed legged on the stage floor leaning back on my hands.
“w-what happened?” I asked looking up at Jayden whose outstanding blue eyes turned dull and empty.
“You collapsed on stage, I… everyone was worried”
This was the second time that I had collapsed after regaining a memory. Not wanting to think about it I shook my head, stood up quickly and smiled just like nothing happened. “I’m fine” I laughed.
“Ok” was all he said and walked out the door.
Thinking about what Lilly said I chased after him. “Jayden Wait!” I shouted, as he began to run faster when he noticed me. I managed to catch up enough to grab him by the arm. “Can you just wait a minute?!”
“Let me go!”
“No! I want to talk to you” I sighed, “look I’m sorry for whatever I have done, but I can’t stand it when you ignore me. So please just let me speak.”
“Fine…”he said no longer resisting, “but can you please let go of my arm your hurting me”
“Sorry” I said with a laugh, I didn’t realise that I had lost control of my strength. “So it’s Valentine’s Day on Friday, so I was wondering if you would like to go out tonight to the amusement park.”
“Why tonight?” he asked clearly uninterested in my proposal.
“Well it closes down tonight forever and I’ve never been”
Jayden sighed; he seemed to be hesitant of giving me an answer. I my chest began to tighten; I wanted him to forgive me so badly that I would do anything to regain his trust.
“Ok, I’ll go with you,” Jayden said still avoiding my gaze “however you must promise to leave me alone after I do”
I thought for a moment. Leave him alone for good? This meant that he still wanted nothing to do with me. I sighed, this was something I really wanted but it looked like I had to let to let it go.
“I will”
As Jayden walked away I heard him mutter, “This is only for your own good Hazel”
*
If this was a musical, my date with Jayden should have had “kiss the girl” in the background. However this was not a fairy tale and my happy ending was not to come. Don’t get me wrong, it was a beautiful evening. There were times that even Jayden was having fun. We laughed at the not-so-scary Haunted House, shared Fairy Floss and enjoyed the breeze blowed through our hair on the top of the Ferris wheel. The lights of the city sparkled like the stars as the sun began to set. Jayden and I walked through the glistening streets, talking about the wonders of the amusement park. To me everything was perfect but something made Jayden seem distant, perhaps he was struggling with something he didn’t want to face, much like the relationship with my sister. I really did try to work things out with her; I even believed that she was also trying to fix things. However, something inside of me kept me from getting closer to her. It was probably something to do with the voice inside my head.
There are no good people in this world. Trust no one, you will only get hurt. It said.
My inner conflict is a struggle I have to face, as if I didn’t want to accept what I thought was true. I believed this was not only going through my mind but Jayden’s as well. It was my own conflict of confidence that kept me from reaching out to him.
“Hey…Jayden…?” I asked with a deep breath. I was going to ask him, I had to find a way to encounter our problems. However I was distracted by Jayden, whose breathing became increasingly heavier.
“What’s wrong?” Jayden growled as we walked down an empty alleyway.
“You seem… are you okay?”
Without warning he knocked me to the ground. I groaned as my head hit the pavement. I watched Jayden’s eyes as they turned dark, as if his inner conflict had taken over his soul. He but his hands around my throat but I did not struggle. I just relaxed my head as my hair fell loosely onto the pavement. I closed my eyes.
“Hazel?!”
I opened my eyes to see that Jayden’s eyes had returned to normal and had widened when he saw my position. He quickly got up and stepped away from me.
“I’m so-so sorry! I…” he stuttered avoiding my gaze.
“Jayden…?” I said as I slowly got up.
“H-how could you let me do that… you are supposed to run away as soon as you think you are in danger” he stated. As I began to take a step closer, he stepped away.
“This is why I have been so distant, why I have been so unwell in the past few days. There is something wrong with me. Every night I have nightmare that confit of different ways I have killed you”
“You could never hurt me” I said trying to get closer to him.
“You don’t understand Hazel” he exclaimed turning away from me, “I’ve done my research. I’m what they call a Fallen Angel. My very existence is a curse; the curse that states I will eventually kill the one I love, without being able to control myself. I love you so much; I couldn’t bear the thought of hurting you. Besides no one can love the non-living”
I grabbed his hand. He looked at me with teary eyes. I smiled as he tried to walk away for my grip was strong enough to keep him from moving.
“You could never hurt me”
“But Hazel…”
“You cannot kill me because I am also the non-living. My death occurred eight years ago. Although your conflict may strive for it I know that nothing could destroy our life together”
“Hazel…” he pulled me in and hugged me, resting his head on top of mine. I felt at peace for the first time and I believed that he felt the same way.
“You know I always thought I’d be alone, but you changed that. With you I belong somewhere” he said. I smiled, I knew that he felt that way about me, “but are you sure you want to be with someone who is as cursed as me”
“Jayden, I don’t know who I am, I have no memory of my past. However, I do know that no matter who I am or what you become, my feelings for you will never change. I will love you until the end of time as not even death can part us”
He held me closer, I was so comfortable I closed my eyes a
*
“No Valentines!” Racheal screamed when she opened her locker on Friday morning, “How could I not get any love letters”216Please respect copyright.PENANAVyOfzaU7jb
“That’s a shame but it’s only the morning” Alice smiled awkwardly, “perhaps you’ll get some later”
“Gee don’t you know anything?” Racheal exclaimed, “It’s customary that valentines are given at the start of the day”
I shook my head at Racheal’s false and non-existent knowledge.
“How ‘bout you Hazel?” Alice asked.
“Haven’t checked, I already had my Valentines” I said reminiscing about my wonderful date with Jayden.216Please respect copyright.PENANAV2DWINOLXW
“Just check, it’s customary” Racheal grumped, still sulking about the absence of admirers.
I opened my locker. Inside was a large teddy bear, with a large heart with my name. I gasped in delight, it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.
“Hazel” Jayden called from behind.
“Oh My God thank you” I shrieked jumping into his arms.
“That’s not all…” he said reaching into his pockets. He grabbed a small box which contained two opal rings, “they’re promise rings.
He put one in my hand and I read what was on it around the small gem.
I will love you ‘till the end of time as death could never part us.
“From now on we will always be together”
I smiled as we shared our first kiss. Alice and Racheal watched in amazement and joy. At that moment everything was perfect.
But it was not to last.
nd sighed.
“I love you” I said
“I love you too Hazel”
*
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