239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDo5exNn5RI
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrEPrRTNeIF
和喜歡Kelvin的女生進行了一場不愉快的對話後，我便到了學校門口會合Kelvin：「行得。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6qR6xP1BUa
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTLTNTKhYX
「咁耐嘅？」他問。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFzyTaqXKv
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjpSoPo9eu
「嗯。」想要放鬆心情的我說：「不如今日去掃街，肚餓想食啲嘢。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuur3i0Kgr
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9wBuD2Q0te
「好阿。」Kelvin和我並肩而行。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtnDb3ppP4
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmHDm5CyYu
這不是我第一次和Kelvin單獨放學，可是我的心情竟然緊張起來。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2JSHW6eMMW
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuhdVaRoLZa
自從被同學懷疑我和Kelvin、古榮的關係後，我的心便不再單純。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfiE9yWz8B
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ATY1GVLdt
我開始思考，難道我對他們抱有愛情的感覺而沒有察覺？到底怎樣才算是愛情的喜歡？239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡet5YZivemT
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfj4CQXrEg
我仔細打量Kelvin的側臉。他有一顆性感喉核、單眼皮、微卷頭髮、手臂有因為勤力做運動而得來的小肌肉、永遠不願穿得整齊的校服。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFhQhkQLan
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3UGh9D7kV
我第一次有這種想法——每天見面的Kelvin外型其實不錯，能夠和他去掃街真幸運。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡewp9IPQJS6
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7oz9MEqzk
人的想法很微妙，明明沒有事情發生過，我跟Kelvin本來就會相約一起放學和掃街，只因為幾句說話便能扭轉一個人的想法。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqJ6WIaV9a
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tehM5Jqfy
想法塑造習慣，習慣就是生活。一個人的想法非常重要，光用腦袋便能改變自己對世界的觀感。難怪校長時常訓話，學生必需留意自己說話的用詞。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dOx0Kf4TK
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RpJHFp7wY
爸爸吸毒後會有這種感覺嗎？生活過於苦悶無新意，對身邊本來平平無奇的東西，從無到有，誕生了快感。就像吃完精神鴉片，內心一陣飄飄然。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03McXzSVc5
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsj5MnROUFN
「喂。」Kelvin打斷我的發情，還伸手摸摸我的額頭：「你係咪唔舒服？塊面咁紅嘅？」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjWvNbFH0lp
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJoTB4GP19B
「咳咳⋯」我因為吞了一半的口水，嚇得狂咳。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfxoneBa3J
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTS2nMF77R1
Kelvin拍拍我的背：「洗唔洗早啲返屋企休息？」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0TR4CMu1I
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDKeBGP1Cet
「唔洗。我吞口水唔小心瀆親姐。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgstU259Szv
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw2B4jJfNZ4
「咁蠢嘅人都有，你陣間食燒賣小心啲。」說話一啖砂糖一啖屎是Kelvin的特色。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHFCGfZFAb
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpr2VjY7U3U
我站在Kelvin旁，一邊吃撈麵，一邊等待著我的芋圓鮮奶茶。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvaIibfw3Hr
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq9q3LLzouL
腦中是各式各樣的幻想。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkXnoOj5mY
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxTkBkq2nCp
如果我跟Kelvin談戀愛，會一直感受到這種飄飄然嗎？239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gEilpMbIH
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZ5RGcV31v
如果會，戀愛似乎不錯。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cha9S5PvX
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zawMCQ4xr
「琴日睇新聞好爆阿，韓流巨星宣佈退出樂壇。」Kelvin說。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6lj3vk5e0
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlef34ZVo7m
「係咩？我無留意。」我通常聽本地音樂，對外國音樂不熟悉。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUijBZfxSxh
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ63XHc9VOyE
「原來佢做龜公，開間酒吧做毒竇，仲有堆明星朋友喺Group share落藥迷姦嘅片段，好痴線。」Kelvin說。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKyjDaWqYr
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3VRA6yg97
「咁癲？佢好似都幾紅。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgC0aWN5L5
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mvsU6pIWC
「真係無樣睇。好彩你唔迷呢啲韓星。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqbJR8kNcP
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLT7bn7oBI
「點解咁講？」我問。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpttUVXllq
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhJD27rRC8
「鐘意埋啲衣冠禽獸就傷心囉。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPex6pMGj5
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAv2UMkQae
「我問你一條問題阿。如果你識人吸毒，仲會唔會同佢做朋友？」Kelvin的話題讓想起我的爸爸。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kNAc35pRN
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhGpr3RMat
「唔會，我唔會接受。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5aOTbON5Jm
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jgCLVfG0n
「如果係你朋友嘅屋企人吸毒呢？」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOyC8C0Cnqz
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRp0NBUibF
「咁就難講。」Kelvin說：「佢出入屋企品流複雜。我會盡最大努力幫佢，等佢唔好誤入歧途。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGRNbn8f8u
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1w7oLNaxHU
我從來沒有嘗試幫助爸爸，鼓勵他離開黑社會：「屋企人吸毒，唔係朋友本人吸毒，唔代表會誤入歧途嘅。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAv1WGuwfD4
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡup5J9c429T
想來爸爸也是身不由己賺錢還債，以他的能力除了保安、洗碗也沒有工作適合他，沒有站在他的立場勸喻也是種偽善。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeg8KA1SMXj
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdri0PRVmAf
「係好容易呀！如果你老竇喺房食冰隊草，你喺廳都會聞到啦，毒品喺你眼前，又會心郁郁想試。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmbgGgURw1u
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2PrLlSOeFK
「你唔係好鐘意幫人㗎咩？」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0Is8Pmb0e
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItP1AErDKH
「阿婆行動不便，點可以相提並論！吸毒對我嚟講無咩討論空間！你話我歧視都係咁講，同賭錢一樣，無人拎住支槍迫佢，累己累人。幫過對方拒絕就算，連朋友都唔會做。留返俾專業嘅機構幫手。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVNdE99xnn
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeZgT2nTIZ
Kelvin的說話打破了我和他戀愛的幻想。跟正義的Kelvin坦白父親有吸毒習慣絕對是一件自掘墳墓的事。他會討厭我的家庭，管東管西，而需要倚賴父親生存的我在成年前也無法解決家庭背景的問題。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLShHLISwB
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLOQy51Ejb
他無意的批評讓我內心不舒服。我是受害者，也很討厭自己的家庭阿！可是家庭的影響一直都在，它就像一道封印在身上除不掉的詛咒。無論是自己、抑或他人，同樣避之則吉。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡITtDwXUERf
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQ2tBuScsy
我寧願沒有開口詢問，沉醉在五分鐘前的粉紅色泡泡裡。我忘記了我和Kelvin是對難以找到共識卻常常一起的朋友。現在的我失去了幻想，變得更自卑了。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjcQS4zliG
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxqIsgRte5R
我和Kelvin的關係並不穩固，他會隨時離棄我。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf9F4Jc3peP
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kut46X3WW
婚姻的承諾都能推翻，更何況是乳臭未乾的戀愛。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5F6lMVeai
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMzSQC6X55
「點解人係群體動物？點解人要互相來往？」我喃喃自語：「係自私，係計算？兩個人，一定係有利益先會走埋一齊。世界上根本冇無私嘅愛。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsZMytH459X
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUZ9Kalgj1K
「咁功利，一齊開心唔得咩？」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy0UYwuaeWj
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuP2lch5gs
「開心都係一種利益。可能對方人緣好，帶自己去認識朋友；可能係對方博學多才，學業上幫到自己；可能係自己孤單，想有人陪伴自己。總之就係因為利益開始，互相需要，到咗某一日，唔再幫到大家，就自然分開。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ79j8bxsdUY
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXwVnklCmQ
我為未發生的事情擔憂。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeko3FIQRDU
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQV0JPfrvNn
面對關係看得見的分岔，倒數著珍愛的關係終會消逝，無力感擴散。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRTq9iZN9p
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡraRyWLK3mF
「你今日做咩事咁多愁善感？」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTF2DlC92oB
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RnAHHnPEu
「無呀。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2zZDPnpCY
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiLGG9UyULX
「我知啦，思春期！中二病！」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcefrBE3yK
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbygkQy9Hgl
「唔知呀！你話係就係啦。」239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoNas3Gotz
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnh7SEul4F8
人生就是各種徒勞無功的零碎。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLo73wzu4k4
239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLGclj1Pir
難過。239Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7PobYFyTr
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