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去見訓導張的時候還未開始上第一節課，經過一輪審問回到課室時經已是小息。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuR9Kobaa9M
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「喂，姣雞返嚟啦。」254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzuNNMZzpy
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「佢俾訓導張審完，一副生人勿近嘅樣。」254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡChgOZwzUjI
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「抵佢死啦！平時咁鐘意姣仔。」254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQTXom3EVf
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我到今天才知道，原來班上不曾說過話的同學們如此討厭我。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAYydkcAWYG
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流言被其他八卦取代只是我一廂情願的錯覺。今天大家不再假裝，就在我面前談論當時人。也對，校服都夠膽偷了，還會不敢在我面前說話嗎？我只是有點兒安靜，不是聾子，能夠聽得到你們的說話。可以想想我聽到別人說自己是非時的感受？彷彿把事情搞得越難看，他們越興奮。在他們面前，我不是一個能夠享有基本尊重的人類。我只是一個娛樂大眾的小丑。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgMPjwfMfa
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同班同學遠離我卻又在遠處談論我，當中包括古榮。他明知道我剛剛見完訓導，也沒有過來跟我搭話或者問候。如果害怕與我交談被同學看到會尷尬，大可以發一個短訊，可是他沒有。這個行為充分體現了我在他心目中的位置，心照不宣。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6AzFLtIBH
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我帶著被背叛的憤怒和古榮對上眼神，他閃縮別過臉逃避。眼前的古榮陌生，難以想像他是曾經和我親近過，天天一起吃飯的好朋友。古榮主動邀請落單的我用餐、一起吃過許多頓豬油魯肉飯、在我和Kelvin意見不合之間調解。所謂的回憶只是一場自作多情的綺夢。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7umW2Fh2yF
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脆弱的友誼小船翻側，終於意識到一切好意屬於人情世故客套。就如葉瑞恩你的命運，無法擁有什麼，凡事何必太認真？我祈求自己胡塗，能夠偽裝懵然，一切如常。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQqVvy5xP4
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現實是，由察覺真相的一刻開始，剩下的只有唏噓和哀悼——我們的關係回不去了。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJqZgPKr2H
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古榮逃離我眼神的畫面歷歷在目。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8CfCBbgX9
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永遠也回不去。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JXQbG1pxp
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是我天真、不夠城府。他日遇到友善的朋友，請記得建立一道厚厚的牆壁，不要再隨便交出真心信任。唯一慶幸的是我在年輕的時候上了人生寶貴的一課，在劣勢中找到一點自我安慰。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZel8EAkrx
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我伏在桌子上，閉上眼睛，逃避世界所發生的事。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVDbmzyGdb
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彷彿看不見，身邊就什麼事也沒有發生。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡom7RDVJorB
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關掉視覺觀感，聽覺被放大加強。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWb0xDmLpM
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「佢身材平過洗衫板，咁都好意思出嚟姣仔。」254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbg5jwXvlfs
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「日日黑面死老豆咁嘅樣。」254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNr5tbhESNn
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「佢個背囊係街市$50貨色，極Bad Taste。」254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwU3QbWiCKI
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他們不瞭解我，也不打算去瞭解我。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsex7suz8d
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這個故事教訓了我，如果你不勉強自己合群，就會落得如此下場。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcEHs5l3QOu
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人類就是如此寂寞的個體。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyLR7tNsUn
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我沒有力量獨自面對一切。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3EYG4iZlp
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疲累、被背叛、憤怒、傷心、自信心低落，內心充斥著各種情緒。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1Uecg10MX
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我的心情糟糕透頂，無法承受更多。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRz0kPP0BV
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此刻我好希望身邊有人能分擔我的心事，無論是誰也好。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNcLivj2gk
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我卻無法向任何人尋求協助。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRrhMVe3VPw
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好朋友離我而去。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQMIvZXyJO
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家人不會幫助我，生命唯一的價值是做爸爸的傭人。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVi0IwHfjD
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學校的訓導老師更是欺負我的元兇之一。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3s9l6QIe1
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別人家的小孩會受到這種對待嗎？254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNSVeXdQRH
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當訓導張說打電話告訴父母，他們大概能夠洋洋得意地叫訓導打阿，誰怕誰。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBctXWHTcyF
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搞不好人家的父母是律師、報館記者，可以把訓導張這教畜的職位拿掉。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0ZJbT2sN1
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而我只是宇宙一粒微塵，無法改變任何事情，被人隨意輾壓。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTi9kifGxAP
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人生沒有希望。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Jxh9r38Vk
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我用右手手指觸摸著左手的脈搏。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1fTxjhjQr
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若我使用𠝹刀在手腕中割一下，鮮血會從傷口中溢出。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWYbPNpRP0a
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若我能感受到皮膚的疼痛，放鬆一點，使能享受傷口的快感。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8PeU5td48
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若我能熟習刀片擱在皮膚裡的感覺，再放膽地進入深一點、再深一點。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbfJpJU9pE
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很快便能到天堂。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIVaqq57o74
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我的一生從來沒有作惡，總不會下地獄吧？254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4b7Td59UFR
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當我幻想著把𠝹刀在手腕中一割，手腕竟真的感到有點痕癢。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvqIFu8LDZ
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沒法解釋原因，可是這個殘暴的念頭卻能讓我抒解了一點壓力。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDrfVg7f5r
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我把𠝹刀放在校裙袋裡，讓它成為我安全感的來源。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFsnzDQ2eB
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若有一天有誰傷害我，我也有能力保護自己。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGD29MN29w
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煎熬地等待分秒過去，下課的鐘聲終於響起。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HUDQHMD7j
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我以九秒九的速度直奔學校大門。​254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1TZjVcM90S
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逃離這個鬼地方。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAdJHL0KsV2
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無論以何等形式。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCP1Gt7HR0p
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我終究會離開這個吃人的社會。254Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqsjTrrAar
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