「你還可以嗎？」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlRPCtK2Rz
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAsEfCGL8dv
「無法不可以。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6ljRfu9ZA
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqqcgUiqCY
「如需幫忙，來找我吧。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd0vyya9Fpn
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEa3NGV77qo
「謝謝你。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCgKOVmNL9
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRorZ3R94df
我對隸屬同組的小妹報以虛弱苦笑。與她向來關係不錯，概略知道彼此家庭狀況——同是經濟支柱，一屋老嫩。聽到她主動提出幫忙，我除了感激，更多的是恥感。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJJUtolxXk
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZssOxoPiy
唉！多講無謂，反正既成事實。倒不如動腦筋思考如何向妻子說明狀況。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbTF18BB8T
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw2v4BAHDTR
疫情關係，全球經濟不景氣。我和妻子預料這段艱難時期將會維持好一段日子，早已節衣縮食，積穀防饑。但我們慢慢沒有想到老闆會有此一著：工作日數減半意味薪金減半。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3fNIRON9bw
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKpvFrxoRw
供樓開支無法削減，父母醫療開支不能削，孩子教育開支不能減。唯一可以削減的只有我們夫妻倆的花費……678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdXMM0ROBb8
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3OnJE4txZu
飯後，兩老早睡，兒女溫習，妻子洗碗。我怯怯到廚房去。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxCgYh9Nx0
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs47oXnHQMN
「老婆……」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsMFEfjEM4R
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPgBumGGEUQ
「有困難？金錢？」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVeB1jOn6Kb
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkrNFCFcyGb
妻子搶佔發言先機，內心不安的我更覺虛怯。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgwE6rJVogO
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2UvFKyj02Q
「是。明天開始，只需星期二、四上班。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7yUIE2PY23
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kLlS6l3kl
「嗯。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNI9PKX0kNe
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQ8m05ObWm
妻子沒再多話，專心洗碗。她的冷靜淡然在我意料之外，卻又在情理當中。無力改變現實，也就只得接受和硬撐，呼天搶地無補於事。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLkXWG8nIt
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEenIWtvU5W
我回睡房躺在床上發愣。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxtfUOpDlBY
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflnc5nTlFY
無能。無力。無奈。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjNBcujV8yH
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomHjhSaO5o
千思萬緒化作團團亂線。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMY2YOWCruE
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0kwGv30ML
剪不斷，理還亂。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAYJkdakCGg
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡno1jK3MmI2
勿剪，別理。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC1PFrE05S2
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTBSF6PZBT
待時日將其化解。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeuFROe6C90
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZUc0nkewlH
莫操心。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2892mv8jfG
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMiY7IyXwb
莫操心？678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlR7eyDRmtF
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliSqbvLuu4
如何莫操心？678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmI6fTwArOH
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPHzQYn3wU
我知道困境必定會過去，但我必須硬撐直到那天到來。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6g9nBev7d1
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNjdJXFN2s2
撐多久？如何撐？678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡia5C1ok5mX
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkURVkkoG0i
不知道……678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgaMdSaiuWX
日出。星期二。上班員工人數銳減，辦公室冷清不少。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRfdARuaIB
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaN83lQfdkL
有人若無其事，有人變得寡言，有人大吐苦水。不論個人感受如何，公司繼續營運，世界繼續運轉。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGA4dmP139J
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxxmS39aoC
啟動電腦。電腦桌面背景是站在浮冰的北極熊。毛色暗啞，骨瘦如柴，神色虛弱。想必多日找不到食物，飢腸轆轆。絕望？誰管你的！天地蒼茫，白皚皚一片。無論北極熊是否存在，北極仍是北極，我仍在地球另端為家庭財政傷透腦筋。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxkRwqJL3K
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOgKvuQV5l
午餐。翻熱食物。是昨夜飯餸，白飯菜心排骨。白飯黏糯，菜心苦黃，排骨柴乾。想要一支豉油。下班後去買吧！不了，豉油不是必需品，不該浪費金錢買奢侈品。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFFPefL6tXp
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybCsZxn2WH
下班時間，加班。加班同事還不少。沒法子。減少工作日數不代表減少工作量，也不代表工作進度可以放慢。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrHkR4v9Ik0
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8DkOPAuMEA
每次想及時間、日子，位於電腦屏幕右下方的時鐘就會顯得格外礙眼：它在提醒我妻子的飯菜變涼了、孩子掛念我的心情變淡了、父母與我相處的時間變短了；它在催促我加快手腳完成當前項目，接下來的工作將以排山倒海之勢襲來；它在教導我人生大道理，一寸光陰一吋金，吋金難買寸光陰，更何況加班沒有加班費……678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpfNe21QUF
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsi0l35qELL
關機，正式下班。心情太壞，說服不了自己留下來。回首，同事們仍在埋頭苦幹。理解，但無法奉陪到底。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgpuMLZsZwZ
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZCJUuSXb3
大街上，人影疏落，商店無燈。車站無人，想必有一班次剛剛離站。等。車頭燈或白或黃，在黑夜暗色環境當中尤其刺眼眩目。節慶煙花，演唱會螢光棒，無燈飯廳裡的金魚缸，床頭小燈，被窩裡的手提電話屏幕……腦袋失控，只管想著一堆毫無意義、不著邊際的雜亂畫面。累？是吧。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNlpugNBjl
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYh7tuMGbqz
我笑。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfUQRpL1Fd5
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKnNVlUZYhe
在巴士入站之際決定轉身離開。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuHdyKb03O
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSKB8uGR0v
忽爾不想回家。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9C7DEUPuGk
「飯餸在雪櫃。你自行翻熱吧。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhimFFVwCvq
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjt4ttqBPA0
「好的。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBUSdvwwNk
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzE2lRo4htY
我敷衍回應妻子幾句後也就洗澡去。熱水沖去臉上油塵，皮膚霎時變得乾淨而乾燥，微癢微痕。或許每個人都是因為這些不著眼的小耗損而老去。無可避免。無可奈何。是否只得順從？是否只得接受？不順從又如何？不接受又如何？678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQWvWRgA3G
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUIr8xaumX7
只會苦了自己。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqN6fwZhtG
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOgOyPdaOY
努力改變過，極力掙扎過，然後一切依舊——世界依舊不似預期。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkO7swFCOR
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4pmPcR2EA
通體蝕骨的無能無力無奈。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWXjvQHRz3
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWXFVTQFns
浴後，睡床上。妻子望著天花發愣。天花燈沒有亮著，光源自窗外滲入，剛巧側照伏在天花的小蟲，以誇張得滑稽的比例拉長小蟲影子，如怪物，如鬼魅。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYOIxTBFC8
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tDEro94U4
「你的同事有沒有跟老闆反映近來遇上的問題？」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrBH2ElpueX
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBHDnWimgxL
「沒有。大家都在座位上邊罵邊工作。」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyQHg1Cdms
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0orCwWoAo2
妻子乾笑一聲，側身面窗睡去。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6F3CauFdun
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfiVjwNVPWd
我實在笑不出口，呆望天花數蟲子。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKXHIjuMxE
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLnehn7Qqg2
一、二、三、四、五……678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY3o0Tp58Ld
註：678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHinbaRs5C
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzLbIk65lK
***題目其中一句問「不知道大家有沒有因為這場疫情失去了甚麼呢？」678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8ajmVU64m
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSfuYsRYcR
我認為大家除了關於物質上（例如金錢、生活質素）、生理上（例如生命、健康）及心理上（安全感、與親友相聚的快樂）的失去，還有自我認同（例如對掌握自身未來的自信、對於自身的道德批判）的失去。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfpJvCkejM
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡze1wsHKSLo
未必關乎大是大非，每次小小的自私自利或是小小的屈辱或是小小的啞忍退讓，足以大大貶低自我形象。這是否疫情過去就可以彌補的傷害？誰知道。678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhC4VFN6Jnq
678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx2l2NvKKmQ
***此篇會另外收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》678Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsDO2fhLwnG
然後按「加至主畫面」